This is a oneshot for KatieKazaMizAwesome.
She's one of my most awesome reviewers.
I don't own anybody, unfortunately.
This is something different for me.
It's in The Miz's point of view.
Please enjoy, and remember that I love to read reviews!
I'm The Miz, and I'm going to explain why I am better than "Dashing" Cody Rhodes.
It has come to my attention that Cody has been proclaiming himself as being 'dashing' over on Smackdown. He says that this is because a Diva's poll named him as the most handsome superstar. This poll doesn't sound very accurate as it appears to have missed both myself and my former tag team partner The Shaman of Sexy himself, John Morrison.
All my Mizfits knew that this was the year of The Miz. Even those Miztakes have to admit it now that I am the United States champion, as well as Mr. Money in the Bank. Due to this miscarriage of justice in naming Cody the most handsome, I have compiled a list of ways that I am better than him. Enjoy!
1. I got into WWE without relying on daddy. I did it on my own, along with obligatory appearances on reality TV shows.
2. My legs look good when I wear trunks. Cody looks like a teenage girl.
3. I was the better member of my tag team. Now Ted is the better Legacy member. Look at the facts; he got a trust fund, a title belt and a hot valet… Cody got Husky Harris and a weekly slot giving grooming tips.
4. Speaking of which, I don't need facials. My skin is naturally this awesome.
5. I breathe through my nose. Enough said.
6. My finisher sounds far superior. Would you rather have the Skull Crushing Finale, or Cross Rhodes? I thought so.
7. My attire rocks. Does Cody have his own logo? Nope. Does he have his own t-shirt, in two different colours? Nope. All he has is that black bomber jacket… And they took away his socks, so now you can see more of his skinny legs.
8. I have my own teeth. Take a look at Cody's teeth when he debuted and then take a look now. He totally has veneers. Not a patch on my pearly whites…
9. He's never won a singles title. May I remind you that I am the United States Champion, as well as Mr. Money In The Bank… And I was a longer reigning tag team champion than him too.
10. Cody can't get a date. The best he could do was Beth Phoenix. He might as well have been gay. Now, me for instance…I have dated such beauties as Layla and Maryse. All Cody had was Husky Harris, but he got eliminated…boohoo.
11. I am the all round entertainer. I can wrestle, I can sing, I can dance, I can rap…there's no end to my talents. While I'm showing them how it's done at karaoke, or busting a move with the chicks, Cody's at home with his comic books and G.I. Joes.
12. I don't have a baby oil fetish. I think Cody has a serious addiction to the stuff.
13. I am not a nerd. Cody is a nerd. Simple enough.
14. I have much better fashion sense. My waistcoat and shirt combos win over Ed Hardy t-shirts and a nose stud.
15. Because I'm The Miz and I'm AWESOME! That speaks for itself…
What do you think?
Any chance of reviews?
All this is meant in a humorous manner.
I think Cody's great too, but I love The Miz more!
*Katie - I hope you like this! xxx