Title: All The Wrong Reasons
Pairing: Shizuo x Izaya
Disclaimer: I own none of these characters!
THIS STORY CONTAINS MALExMALE RELATIONSHIPS. You have been warned.
"Mirads" are my made up creatures.
His hand is incredibly warm against my cheek, and I subconsciously turn my head into that familiar touch. I breath softly and open my eyes to see Izaya leaning over me.
No matter how many years have passed, my heart still manages to skip a beat every time I see him. It was something engraved in my very being, because I loved this man more than life itself.
It had taken a couple months after boarding that train to get a call from Tom assuring us that Shiki was behind bars for good. Izaya was so happy that he was singing weird songs for days that annoyed the hell out of me. So I bought him that chocolate fountain he wanted to shut him up.
I had quickly come to the conclusion that I didn't want to use Izaya in any way. No wishes. He was a person, my lover, and... well... seeing him pout because we actually had to use rags and disinfectant to clean instead of a snap of his fingers was adorable, so.
It fascinated me to expose Izaya to the vast amount of things he had never known before. And whilst helping him discover things, I discovered things about myself.
He was delighted by roller-coasters.
I did not have any sort of dance rhythm in my body what-so-ever.
Izaya hated long car rides.
I felt comforted with my head in his lap.
Izaya came to the realization that he loved chocolate. It was astonishing how he could eat as much chocolate as he wanted to, or as much of any food for that matter, and not gain a thing. Creepy mirad powers. But it did lead to quite some interesting adventures, especially when he announced he liked chocolate best when it was all over me.
I started liking chocolate a lot more too.
Izaya doted over Shizu-chan like a mother and her baby. The damn dog grew up into a big shaggy monster, and was promptly placed outside our brick home. Izaya had whined over that, and spent a vast majority of time outside to play with him.
I chuckle, now, thinking back to me getting jealous over a dog.
We had Shizu-chan for eleven years.
Izaya cried after losing the first thing that was ever his own. I just held and rocked him in my arms that whole night. I had offered to get him another puppy, but he turned it down. There was no replacement, he'd said.
As the years dragged on, it was growing painfully obvious that mirads did, in fact, have no concept of age. Izaya did not grow.
He never changed.
We moved around because of this. Not that we were the most social people in the first place, but neighbors and people at work would notice something soon enough.
I kept contact with Tom. We would meet somewhere every year when the contract was up, and exchange ownership. He was the only one I ever fully trusted with something as precious as Izaya. And when Tom got married and had a son, Chiaki, I knew who would take Izaya when I was gone.
Izaya wouldn't let me talk of such things, even though I knew we should. Grey hairs were not going to go away, they would multiply. He tried so, so hard to look past that fact.
But one day, when he walked up behind me and saw the both of us in the mirror, he finally broke down into tears.
Again, I held him. That time, I joined him, salty tears running down my cheeks.
"I want to die with you," he'd said.
I was so angry at those words that I blew up at him.
The following days were tense, and we avoided each other. If I regret anything in my life, it was those days I had spent without him over something that was not going to be changed, no matter how much we wanted it to.
We realized how utterly stupid we were being. If anything, I wanted to spend every waking moment possible with him, not avoid him.
And so I did.
We were never apart. I'd say he was scared to let me out of his eyesight.
I showed him what it was to be human, to be accepted, to be loved. He showed me those same things, though I'm sure he wasn't aware of it. He had thanked me a thousand times during my lifetime, and the only response I ever gave was, "It's because I love you."
I wish there was a way to convey my feelings for him, but no words had enough power to do so.
Something wet splashed against my wrinkled cheek, and my eyebrows furrowed. I reached up and slid my hand over Izaya's. The movement made the IV attached to my hand stretch, and it was slightly uncomfortable, but I smiled.
"It's not fair!" Izaya exclaimed, more tears escaping. The words shook me, and I shut my eyes quickly to gain some control. I had to be strong here, for his sake, I couldn't cry.
"Izaya," I say his name softly, and he tries to focus on me as his lips tremble, "I know it's not fair; we knew this was going to happen. But stop crying. I'm happy. I feel blessed to have had you for as long as I did. And I'm glad you get to continue to live. You get to see the world continue to change, you get to continue experiencing your freedom, you... you have so much to live for."
"But I want you," he whispered, burying his face in my chest.
"You have me. You'll always have me. Just because I can't touch you doesn't mean I'm not there."
He cried harder.
I closed my eyes again, my fingers absentmindedly running through his hair. My heart was hurting. Despite my assurances, I was screaming for the same things.
I wish he'd stop crying.
I wish I could stay with him.
I wish I could continue to show him love.
I wish that loud, continuous sound from the electrocardiograph machine would stop.
I wish he'd stop yelling.
I wish I could still feel him.
I wish I could meet him again.
I wish I wish I wish I wish...
Ugh, I hate school.
Other kids rush passed me when school lets out, but I take my sweet time. The schoolyard is practically empty when I finally decide to exit the building.
My hands clutch at the backpack straps on my chest as I walk.
Movement catches my eye, and I look up to see that I am not the last person after all. An older boy is standing by the entrance, looking down at something in his hand. Whatever it is, it shines in the sunlight.
I'm about to pass him when he looks straight at me.
"Hey you... you're Takumi, right?" He asks.
I raise my eyebrow. I don't know this man, so how does he know me? Mom told me to be wary of strangers, so I back up a step.
"What's it to you?" I ask.
Then he holds out his hand.
I look curiously. It's a jewelry box, and a rather pretty one.
"I'm Chiaki. Want to see a magic trick?" the stranger says.
"Magic doesn't exist," I argue. He just smiled.
"I think it does. Here," Chiaki says, and I tense when he grabs my hand, placing the object in my palm, "I bet if you open this, a guy will pop out."
"Will not," I challenged, staring at the box.
"Go and prove me wrong then," he challenges right back.
I frown, narrowing my eyes at the box. Magic didn't exist.
I opened it, and was almost blinded by bright lights.
"What the-" I say, dropping the box in surprise. I'm even more shocked when a man appears right in front of me.
Like... he was just suddenly there!
My mouth hung open in astonishment.
The man was directing the same look of astonishment looking at me.
"I'll see you later, Izaya!" Chiaki bid farewell, waving before walking away.
I looked at his back, and then back to 'Izaya.'
"Wh- where'd you come from!" I shouted, pointing a finger accusingly. He stared at me oddly for a little while longer before a smile blossomed on his face.
"Heh. I'm disappointed, Shizuo. The boy who has your soul doesn't have blonde hair," he said to the sky, confusing me, before looking down at me, "You're Takumi, right? Well you're in luck, kid! I'm a mirad, and since you opened that box, I can grant you as many wishes as you want!"
"Like a genie?" I asked. Izaya scowled and then groaned.
"No, not like a genie," he sighed, walking up to me and placing a hand on my head. I was shocked at the sudden warmth that spread over me. It felt so happy, so loving, so comfortable, "I've got a lot to teach you."
Something... something... I didn't even know what, but something was drawing me to this person.
I liked him.
So I picked up the jewelry box, dusted it off, and we walked home together.
Oh gosh, it's over guys. Thank you so SO much for all the reviews. I love you all!
Just in case it wasn't clear enough, Shizuo grew old and passed on, but his wishes were so powerful that they were heard by Izaya and he was reunited with him in a new life.