Pretty Little Shapeshifters: Leah discovers the pack mates' well hidden addiction. -PLL spoilers for those who haven't read the books or watched the show.-
'We're leech-free tonight, Jake.' I began to run toward the cliffs where I knew he'd be. 'Anything else you want me to do?'
'No. You're good. Go home and get some rest.' There was something off about his voice. After a while of spending every Tuesday and Thursday night listening to someone's thoughts, there are little things you start to notice.
'Are you okay?' When I didn't get an answer, I knew he had phased. Stopping, I phased back to human form and pulled on my shorts. I was still adjusting my t-shirt when I reached the cliffs.
"Are you okay?" I asked, repeating my question when I saw the familiar hulking figure perched on a protruding rock. "You sounded kinda weird just now."
"Nah. I'm fine. Let's get you home, Leah." We started our trek through the forest, walking toward my house. Just recently, Jacob began insisting he walk me home. I used to question it, but it gave us a chance to talk.
I wasn't the same bitter harpy I was before the big Volturi fight. Emily and I made up not too long afterwards and I was a bridesmaid in her wedding to Sam. Things were still awkward between us two, but it's gotten better since I left his pack. I guess if you have to stare death in it's pale face for a few hours, everything is put into perspective.
After the wedding, I grew my hair out. Right now, it fell just past my shoulder blades. I also started shopping more with the help of the pixie leech and the supermodel leech. Besides the smell and the sparkliness, they weren't actually as bad as I had previously thought. With their help, I began to revert back to my pre-breakup style. Of course, it was more suited to my new lifestyle.
Hanging out with my pack is cool, I guess, if you're the type of person who likes to hear thoughtful and deep conversations. Topics usually include:
-Who's hotter: Megan Fox or Miley Cyrus?
-How long can I go without a shower?
-Who's turn is it to do the pack laundry?
As you can see, my I.Q. hasn't dropped too much. But they were my family: Jacob, Seth, Embry, and Quil. A small, dysfunctional, and annoying family.
"So seriously, Jake? What's wrong?" I asked again as we continued to walk. "Are you depressed about Isa-bitch and her jailbait corpse going to their island this month?"
"Actually, I didn't know that. But thanks for the update, Lee." He smiled a little and started to walk faster. I had to run to catch up with him. "But nothing's wrong. I'm just trying to get home and take a shower so I can crash."
"It's 7:30." Laughing, I pushed his arm. "Since when does Billy care what time you get home?"
"I'm just tired. Can't a guy just want to turn in early?" I shrugged and we continued to walk in companionable silence. The lights of my house were on and we jogged as it came into sight. Seth greeted us at the door. I assumed he had just taken a shower since his hair was wet.
"Hey Jake! Finished your patrol?" Jake nodded as Seth pulled on his sweatshirt. "Embry and I are going to hang out at his place tonight? Wanna come?"
"Nope. Jacob's on curfew." I answered, throwing open the front door.
"Since when are you on a curfew?" I heard Seth ask him before I settled on the couch to watch T.V. Jacob must have left a couple of minutes later because Seth came in to check on me.
"Mom's out with Charlie tonight. She said that she might not be back till morning." We both shuddered at the thought of mom and Charlie together. "You're welcome to hang with us."
"No thanks. I'll just stay and watch some television." I gestured to the romantic comedy that was playing on the Lifetime Movie Channel.
"Okay Lee. I might spend the night at his place, so I'll see you tomorrow." I heard him shuffle toward the door and when it slammed, I knew he was gone. The movie was okay, but when it got boring five seconds later, I turned the television off.
Smelling the area under my arms, I cringed and decided to take a shower. It must have been the longest shower ever because it was eight o' clock when I got out. I pulled on a pair of jeans that actually fit my legs and a printed green tank top.
It wasn't until I sat on my couch that I realized there was nothing to do. I wasn't particularly tired, but I was hungry. As I towel dried my hair, I rummaged through the cabinets and the refridgerator in the kitchen. Then I realized that it was Billy's turn to buy the food for the pack this week.
I pulled on a pair of boots and left the house. Since Jake's house wasn't very far from mine, I decided to walk the whole way. The lights were still on when I ran up and knocked on the door.
The squeaking of Billy's wheelchair was loud as it rolled to greet me at the door. "Hello Leah. I would think you're not just here for a friendly visit." I nodded and he rolled out of the way to let me in.
"Help yourself to whatever there is leftover. Jake's watching T.V. in the living room." Confused, I walked in. Before I went to the kitchen, I tiptoed to the living room to say hello.
Boy, was I surprised at what I saw.
"No Emily! Not the chem room! Don't go with Toby! He's going to kill you!" Jacob was transfixed at the show on television.
I'd heard about it. Before my change, I read the 'Pretty Little Liars' books and really enjoyed them. I knew there was a show being made based on the books, but I hadn't had time to watch it faithfully like Rachel did. I did manage to finish reading the book series.
Apparently, Emily was going upstairs to the chemistry classroom with Toby. The show went on commercial before I could laugh. Jacob seemed to notice his spilled popcorn and cleaned it up. Then he got up and saw me standing there.
"Don't worry. I read the books. Emily's going to be okay." The look on his face was priceless. I mean, he looked positively panic-stricken. Still giggling, I turned on my heel and walked to the kitchen.
Okay. I admit it. I have a problem.
I wasn't even going to watch the show at first. But that storm ruined everything.
Rachel came over that fateful night to watch our T.V. The big storm knocked out her power and her cable box was screwed up. The old softy I call my father couldn't resist her pouty face and he let her watch our T.V. that night.
I came in from my patrol with Leah and was surprised to see her yelling at the television, telling some chick named Aria not to go to Ezra's apartment.
"'A' might see you! Don't do it, girl!" Dad rolled in to greet me and explained the situation. Charlie honked from the driveway and he left to watch the big basketball game on Charlie's flatscreen, leaving me alone with Rachel and that wierd show. Since I had nothing to do, I decided to watch it with my sister.
Biggest mistake of my life.
After ten minutes of the show, I was hooked. Apparently, it was based on a book series. Rachel refused to tell me any important information, saying that I needed to read the books to understand, which just made me more addicted.
I was in a catch-22. If they found out, Seth, Embry, and Quil would never let me live it down. And since rumors spread like wildfire on the rez, I couldn't risk any more mistakes.
I was sitting at a cafe table in the nearly empty Barnes and Noble Starbucks coffeehouse. There was a huge stack of colorful books behind my chair. I was almost to the end of one of the books, literally hanging on the edge of my seat.
"No Emily! Don't kiss Maya! -A- might see you!" I whisper-yelled."Shit. Fuck. OMFG!" (Yes, I actually said OMFG.) I continued to mutter and swear as I read. There was a cough and I looked up.
A sweet, little old lady was staring at me. We shared a tense moment. She finished her cookie and got up. Thankful that the moment was over, I reluctantly closed the book and pulled out a car magazine with a leggy blonde draped over a car on the cover.
Suddenly, a small piece of paper with a phone number landed on one of the pages. The old lady was smiling at me and put a hand on my shoulder.
"That's my grandson's number. He's on the prowl for guys like you." I wasn't sure, but I think she squeezed my bicep a little as she said it. "Firm... I think he'll like you." I choked on my sip of lemon-lime soda.
"Ma-am." I said when I regained my breath. She was 'helpfully' rubbing my back and it was creeping me out. "I'm not gay. I swear."
"That's what Marvin said." She smiled fondly and began to walk away, waving. "Just call him if you're interested."
And she left, leaving me with a soda stain on the magazine, which I had to pay for, and her horny, gay grandson's number.
So because of 'the Unspeakable Event', I was destined to live in suspense.
That first night, I lay in my bed, trying to justify my actions. Those girls are freakin' sexy. And that Emily chick kinda reminds me of Leah. Yeah... No addiction whatsoever.
But then another week passed... And another... And another. I found myself drenched in a cold sweat during patrol with Leah one night because I thought I might not make it back home in time for the show.
That's when I knew I had a problem. The hardest part was keeping my thoughts away from the rest of the pack. Whenever I had flashes of thoughts of the show, I brushed it off as a 'Who's Hotter?' kind of thing.
So I had been looking forward to the 'Pretty Little Liars' marathon for a while. After this, I will quit. But I just want to see the finale. No big deal.
But then Leah walked in. And all my plans were shot. One look at her face told me that I was busted. And then she turned away from me. I could hear her laughter as she disappeared to the kitchen.
I followed her quickly. "That's not what it looks like. I just watch the show because the girls are hot! Please don't tell the guys!"
Leah turned to stare at me, her hands full of sandwich ingredients. She cocked an eyebrow, but said nothing. She looked really pretty, too, just like the actress who plays Emily on the show. Her green tank top brought out her eyes and the jeans she was wearing highlighted her shapely legs.
"Really. It's not like I'm into the show at all. No way. Ummm... The game was on commercial and it looked okay to watch." Again, she said nothing. I took a piece of turkey and stuffed it into my mouth, trying not to babble like an idiot.
"Then I guess I'll just stay and watch T.V. with you. There's nothing else to do at my house. Pass me that coke." She finished making her sandwich and I tossed a can of soda to her, getting one for myself. With a wink, Leah walked to the living room. I could hear her getting settled. How in the hell am I going to get out of this?
I followed her and sat next to her. Thankfully, the show was still on commercial. "So what are you doing here?"
Leah swallowed the final bite of her sandwich and wiped her mouth with a napkin before answering. "There was nothing to eat at my house and I remembered that it was Billy's turn to buy the food for us. So here I am."
The show came back from it's commercial break and we both got quiet. Toby and Emily were in the chemistry room. He was trying to tell her some big secret, but then she freaked out and ran.
"Idiot. Don't run in high heels. It'll end in disaster." Leah muttered and I shushed her. When she raised her eyebrow, my mouth sealed shut. I gotta be more careful.
I watched in suspense as Emily ran through the house of mirrors, hoping for the best. Leaning forward, I watched in rapt attention. Then all hell broke loose.
She tripped and I gasped.
"NOOOOO!" I yelled when the show ended, Emily's scream filling my ears. "Why Emily! Why! She was a good kid... Kinda cute too."
"I don't think it's Toby's fault. He's too hot. Besides, no one told that dumbass to go running in heels. The first lesson in Horror Movie 101 is to take off the heels and throw them at the psycho." Leah was inching away from me. "And get up, Jake. You're embarrassing yourself."
I realized that I was on my knees, clutching the remote as though it would have helped her. The poor device looked as if it were going to break. Embarrassed, I rose and settled on the couch. Another episode was beginning, but nothing really happened after the first couple of minutes.
Rachel told me that she and Leah read all the books. I wonder...
"So, you read the books, right?" I asked, putting on a charming smile. Slowly, I pushed the chip bowl in her direction, happy that she reached for it. Leah would be putty in my hands once she ingested the fatty snack.
"Yeah. So?" The chips crunched as Leah chewed and she swiped the crumbs off of her lips.
"So what happens? Who's -A-? Why was Ali such a bitch?" The questions spewed out of my mouth, like word vomit. "And what does Melissa have to do with it?"
"Okay. First of all, Rachel told me not to tell you anything." She smirked and continued to eat the chips. The crunches taunted me. "And besides, I had to wait for each book to come out so I can read it, why would I tell you?"
"Because you love me and want what's best for your pack brother and I feed you occasionally and... And...? No. That's about it." She surprised me by cackling like an evil villain. I glared as she laughed and laughed, doubling over. She flipped over and I saw that tears were streaming out of her eyes.
"I can't take it! It's too funny. God! I love seeing you squirm!" She risked a glance at me and burst into hysterics once more. By this time, I was getting annoyed.
"I don't see what's so funny." She had calmed down by then and was gasping for air. Then she took another look at me and laughed again. "Okay. If that's how you want to play it."
She froze and furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. I got up and sat on her. Leah started writhing around and punching my thigh. "GET OFF OF ME! GOD! I CAN'T BREATHE!"
"Please! Pretty Please with cherries on top!"
"NO GODDAMN IT!"
"But why?" I wailed. She kicked me off, got up and started to walk away. I latched myself onto her legs and pleaded even more.
"OKAY! I'll tell you!" She kicked me off and made a show of dusting off her black leather boots. I stood also, trying to regain any dignity I lost. Leah raised an eyebrow and smirked. I know that smirk...
And with that, she ran out of the door. Dad yelled his goodbye. He said something else, but I didn't hear it as I had started off after her. Leah was a good five hundred feet in front of me. Damn, where'd she learn to run like that? I'm gonna miss the season finale! It's a good thing it's on commercial.
I didn't know where I was chasing her too until I saw the familiar structure.
Leah was gonna snitch to Embry and Seth. Fuck. My. Life.
I was definately going to tell Seth and Embry. This was just too good to pass up. Who knew, Jacob Black: wanna-be stud muffin extrordinaire, was a closet 'Pretty Little Liars' crack whore?
He was gaining up on me, but luckily, I made it to Embry's yard before him. Jumping the extra few feet to the door, I banged on the front door loudly. "Em, Seth, OPEN UP!" I was about to say more when a calloused hand clamped over my mouth.
"Lee-ah!" Jacob moaned in that whiny voice I really hated. I licked his hand and watched in amusement as he shrieked. "That's so gross!"
The door flew open and Seth and Embry stared. "I have something to tell you." Before they could say anything, I pushed my way into Embry's house. I heard a couple of protests. My initial plan was to settle my ass on Embry's comfy couch, then make Seth and Em squirm until I told them what I had just witnessed.
The guys were tripping over themselves to keep me from the living room. I was confused until I turned the corner to go into the living room.
All it took was a quick glance at the television to figure it out.
"Seth, Embry? You too?" Jacob looked confused until he realized what I was talking about. I felt him stop behind me and stare at the television. What they all did next surprised the hell out of me.
"Oooooh!" Seth squealed. I always knew something was wrong with that boy. He's just to happy. "It's off of commercial break."
The three of them proceeded to storm past me, settling in to watch the show. I stood in the threshold of the door with my mouth wide open. Jacob grabbed a chicken wing and began to tear at it. Seth picked up a half eaten slice of pizza and gnawed on it. Embry took a sip of his fruit juice.
"How long?" I said, giggles lodged in my throat. None of them looked up as they answered.
"Second episode." Jacob.
"Since the sixth book came out. I never got to read the rest cause Lee hid them." Seth. The little turd. I'd been wondering where it had gone.
They fell into silence again. I started to laugh, and laugh some more. When I calmed down, my decision had been made. I stepped over Jacob who was sprawled on the floor and laid myself out on the couch, kicking Seth in the face in the process.
"Ow!" Embry and Jacob shushed him.
"That's what you get for stealing my books, dumbass." I whispered. Embry passed me the pizza box and I bit into a gooey, cheesy slice. The Summer Finale went on, and as I watched, the boys began to get anxious. When the episode ended with Hanna being hit by the car, they fanned themselves overdramatically a la those flaming gay guys on those design shows I like to watch. Seth assured us that Hanna does not die. Embry switched off the television and we sat in silence.
"Wait a minute." Jacob turned to me with a mischievous smile on his face. "Leah. You never told me how it ended."
Embry and Seth both turned to stare at me like rabid prarie dogs. The only difference was that they were hungry for information.
I wonder how fast I can make it to the door...
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