Disclaimer: I don't own FOP. Story inspired by the works of Kaycie Jackson
Chapter 1: Earth's Greatest Evil
High above Earth there can be seen, for those who care to look, a large pink cloud covered in towers and spires that are so far beyond belief, that even the world's most insane teacher would have been left breathless to witness them. Winged creatures of all colours, sporting some of the most ridiculous hats ever seen crowded the streets and passed daily between the many regions of the cloud top paradise and Earth, bringing joy to miserable children who inhabit the blue and green sphere. In the center of this land stands a great building, tall as a sky scraper yet built with the detail and finesse of a Greek temple. This place was the Grand Processing Department of the First Servants of the Great Fair Folk Royal Family, or, as it was more commonly known Fairy World's Central Council Building.
Cosmo, one of the least intelligent fairies anyone had ever had the pleasure (or displeasure) of meeting, sat uncomfortably in a flip down plastic chair in the waiting room of the building. He turned to his wife, grinning stupidly.
"See Wanda, I told you I could order food here." Cosmo sat back. He shook his head and twiddled his thumbs, idly wondering how long it would be until that kid arrived with his hot-dog, and whether he should have ordered a pizza instead.
His pink haired wife rolled her eyes, she knew she shouldn't have bought him along; but Jorgen Von Strangle had been very insistent. That had certainly hurt. She couldn't really blame Cosmo, they had already been waiting here for several hours. She shook her head; it was hard to believe, but it had only been a week since Timmy had defeated the Darkness and, although Fairy World was recovering nicely. Timmy had somehow managed to drag his party out for a whole week, possibly as a secret method to win the love of Trixie Tang. All over Fairy World, Timmy was hailed as a hero, and no one could possibly be more proud of him than her. She watched with baited breath as the door opened and the small figure of Binky Abdul stepped forwards.
"Uh... The council will see you now." he stammered. Wanda got up and; despite his complaints that his hot-dog hadn't come yet; dragged Cosmo through the door. They stared around, finding themselves surrounded by cloaked figures. Jorgen stepped out of the crowd, towering over the two fairies.
"Introducing," he growled, annoyed that he was not the most powerful fairy in the room, although he certainly was the strongest and prettiest, "Wakefield Claus, head of the fairy supreme council," a red cloaked figure stepped out of the crowd. He moved silently, walking towards Wanda and bowing low. Cosmo stared at the man, eagerly trying to guess what the mysterious figure looked like beneath his cloak.
"Vato Voltaire, head of Fairy World Internal affairs," a similarly cloaked yellow figure stepped from the huddle, lightening flashing behind him. His costume was different to the other councilors, spiky and all around more sinister looking. Wanda stepped back slightly, she had heard that Voltaire was like something out of a bad horror movie, but this was ridiculous.
"Hamlet Green, head of Fairy World defence and Luxemba Farfly, head of Fairy World communications." a green cloaked figure in some kind of metallic monocle and a purple cloaked figure with two tails of hair hanging out from under her hood stepped from the crowd.
Jorgen cleared his throat. "And finally, head of Fairy World Justice and my own boss, Scorpio Capricorn." Wanda looked around, expecting another looming figure, but no one stepped forwards.
Hamlet Green groaned, "Where is that idiot?"
Somewhere near Timmy Turners party, Scorpio Capricorn woke up. He brushed a prematurely white hair out of his eye. He groaned, finding himself lying in a cart, he never should have accepted that drink from that giant rock monster, that guy just didn't know when to stop. Capricorn smiled, looking down at his watch, his eyes literally jumping out of his head when he caught sight of the time. Scorpio pulled himself to his feet, picked up his eyes and, despite a raging headache, began to head towards the council building at top speed. It only took him a minute to arrive at the council building but during that time he had managed to; curse his luck in 163 different languages, get lost fifty times, knock over several crates of chickens, run directly through the wall of someones living room and cause approximately one million dollars worth of property damage, which, he decided, was not the best start of the day for the head of Fairy World justice. He found and washed his council cloak in under a minute and, after putting both legs down the same leg hole fifteen times, waltzed into the council building as though nothing had happened, ignoring Hamlet's comment ("And I thought I was the slow one.")
"Okay," Wakefield, dismissed the other cloaked figures who had been bought in for dramatic reasons, and sat down at his desk, waiting for the other four to take their seats. "First, I must thank you for your help in defeating our old enemy, or, ahem, new friend, the Darkness... err Yellowness... err Kindness." Wakefield groaned and shook his head, this was going to be a long day.
"Well, anyway, I really must thank you for your tireless efforts against the Darkness. Timmy sacrificed himself in order to save his friends and showed an intelligence far beyond his years. It was really a very adult action." He smiled.
"Thank you," Wanda answered, not really knowing what to say to someone so secretive.
"...And we don't do magic for adults." Luxemba said. Cosmo and Wanda stared at the council, open mouthed as they realised what the council was implying. Wanda's mouth ran dry, she tried to say something, but couldn't think of anything to say.
"Nize huh," Vato grinned, "It took uzz three 'ourz to choreograph zat zpeech." Wanda stared at him.
"How... how... how could you?" she sniffed, trying to hold back tears "He saved you and now you're just going to wipe his memory and put him back with his evil babysitter."
"Wanda, calm down," Luxemba smiled reassuringly "this is a three year notice. We'll be removing you on Timmy's thirteenth birthday".
"But Timmy still needs us," Cosmo began, teary eyed.
"And he will continue to need you for the rest of his life if you carry on like this." Scorpio cradled his head in one hand. "Do you know how many other thousands of children there are out there whose problems you could solve in a month. Timmy is a difficult boy and we just simply can't keep fixing his messes. In fact the older he gets the easier it will be for him to exploit the rules, and the less easy it will be for him to put his mistakes right."
"Please Wanda," Claus smiled warmly leaning forwards. He might as well not have bothered as Wanda couldn't see his mouth anyway, "we want to make this time as happy as possible." The five people got up, Green opening the door to let the two saddened Godparents out of the poofarazzi escape hatch, before leaving with the others through the main door.
"Councilor Green, is it true that your planning peace talks with Pixie inc." one shouted.
"Councilor Farfly, is there any truth to the rumors that Timmy Turner is set to lose his fairies."
"Councilor Voltaire, is it true that your department is solely responsible for the creation of the eliminators." Vato's eyes widened.
"What? NO! Go to hell!"
"Mr Claus! Mr Claus!" Claus climbed up onto the stage and turned to the audience. He raised his hands for silence.
"Yes. It is true that we are taking Mr Turner's Fairies away, but allow me to explain. You see, out there is a monster more powerful, more deadly and more dangerous than the Darkness has ever been. If any one of these creatures found out about our existence, it would surely spell the end for all our kind. Mr Turner will surely, as he grows up, become one of these savage beasts, as all humans do. I am talking, of course, of that great pimply monster. The Teenager."
... Dimmsdale: Three years later...
There is a unhappy place between the Dimmadump and Flappy Bob's Learnatorium in which could be seen the most horrible and gut wrenchingly terrifying place that any child would ever see, Mc Vicky's fast food restaurant. No one was quite sure how Vicky had got a job managing a restaurant but it probably had something to do with the fact that, after Timmy had reached the age of twelve, his parents stopped paying Vicky to babysit, and Icky with a V was left with a lot of spare time and a lot of money. Using this money, and the fact that Mc Vicky's was a franchise owned by her cowardly father and vicious uncle, Vicky was able to get a job there and work her way up the employee ladder, until she became head of the store. Now able to hire anyone, Vicky wasted no time in staffing the place with angst filled, vicious and unfriendly teenagers just like herself. Timmy couldn't believe that he was spending his thirteenth birthday here and wondered why his parents had possibly thought that inviting Mr Crocker was a good idea. The man didn't even teach him any more, but Timmy's dad seemed to like him, which was weird. The only really good thing about being there was the fact that he had managed to invite Chip Skylark as well and, although Timmy didn't like all his music, he was a really nice guy; and he'd bought Timmy a snowmobile, so the birthday couldn't be all bad. Chester and AJ were there too, of course, as was Elmer, Sanjay and, unfortunately, Tootie, who seemed to have somehow hidden inside one of the presents. Timmy rolled his eyes, getting up to order them some food; his parents obviously weren't going to, they were too busy hanging over a somewhat creeped out Chip, Timmy's dad even seemed to be drooling slightly.
"Chhhhhiiiiiipppp Ssskkkyyylllaaarrrkkk..." Timmy's dad drooled.
"Must. Ignore. Son's. Birthday. And. Keep. Staring. At. Terrified celerity." Timmy's mom droned. Timmy got up, heading over to the counter.
"Welcome to Mc Vicky's how may I help you," the teenager behind the counter drawled, literally choking on the word help.
"I'll have Two Vicky supremes with extra cheese, a triple Vicky deluxe, a Vicky Flame fried classic, three unhappy meals and a twerpy meal."
"Will you be having pain with that sir" the lanky teen drawled, picking at his face with his nails.
"No thanks" Timmy said, sincerely hoping that becoming a teenager wouldn't mean he'd end up like that.
"Five bucks extra," the teen snatched the money off Timmy, pocketing it himself, as was encouraged at Mc Vicky's.
Timmy took the food back to the table, placing it down and handing out the food.
"Oh Boy! My Twerpy Meal!" Shouted Mr Crocker as he, and his creepy robotic son, destroyed the meal in a flurry of craziness. Timmy rolled his eyes, hoping that the rest of his Birthday would be better than this.
When Timmy kicked open the door to his room that evening, he was completely astounded by what he saw before him. The room was filled with streamers, presents and pretty much every magical creature that Timmy had ever met. Seeing that most of them were his enemies, Timmy was rather touched that they'd all come together to celebrate his birthday.
"Cosmo! Wanda! You've got to see this he shouted, before noticing them in front of him, "Oh. Yeah. Right. This is awesome, seriously, no one ever threw me a Birthday Party this great before."
"As much as I hate to tell you this," came the ever boring gloating voice of HP from behind Timmy, "we're not actually celebrating your birthday. We're here to celebrate the fact that today, you lose your fairies and everything dear to you." Timmy stared at him, tears beginning to well up in his eyes.
"Crying like a little girl, not cool." Sneered another voice from behind him.
"Wait," Timmy sniffed, regaining composure and stared at his godparents. "It's my last day with you guys and you only invited my enemies to the farewell party."
"Well, we did try to find some magical creatures who still liked you sweety..." Wanda began.
"But there weren't any, so we just invited all your enemies instead. There are loads of them." Cosmo finished
"Poof poof," agreed Timmy's little godbrother.
"What's wrong with us? Anyway," Dark Laser complained, "if I try to destroy you today then she," he looked suspiciously at Wanda, "is gonna turn me back into a picture."
Wanda smiled weakly at Timmy "Well Timmy, seeing that it's your last day ever with us, why don't we do something fun, OK?" Timmy grinned, Wanda was right, there was really no point in wasting the last day he'd ever have fairies with pointless moping. After all, it was his Birthday
5 hours later, one minute before midnight on the 21st of March, the party was mostly over, and everyone, besides Timmy, his fairies and, for some reason, the Pixies, had left.
"What are those two doing here?" Timmy asked.
"Well Mr Turner, we've waited three years to see you defeated, and now you're going to be, we want to share the moment." HP smiled.
"This is the happiest day of my life. I'm getting quite emotional," Sanderson said, and a pixie passed him a box of tissues.
"Someone get the camera," HP grinned. The digital clock next to Timmy's bed turned to 12:00 and a copy of Da Rules appeared in front of them. Jorgen stepped from the book, surrounded by Yellow cloaked figures, streamers flew all around, and Jorgen, smiling uncomfortably, grabbed the Pixies, squashed them into a paper chain and threw them over his shoulder into the wastepaper basket.
"Well," HP's voice drifted out from inside the bin, "this is certainly not how I envisioned the happiest day of my life."
"Timmy Turner!" Jorgen boomed, obviously attempting to sound happy, "Congratulations! You have managed, somehow, to keep your fairies until it was naturally time for you to lose them, seeing as you now no longer need your fairies, your mind will be wiped of all memory of fairies." Timmy cringed, readying himself to be mind wiped. "However," Jorgen continued, "seeing that you are loosing your fairies naturally, we will be allowing your fairies to mind wipe you personally. Also all the magic your fairies have left will remain, and you will be issued replacement goldfish." Jorgen grinned forcibly, trying to suppress his normal grab and erase reflex as he handed his memory eraser over to Cosmo and, along with Wanda, left the room.
"I thought the council was sending someone, less intimidating." Wanda said nervously.
"Yes. We're dangerously understaffed." Jorgen admitted.
Cosmo stared sadly at Timmy, and the pink hatted teenager stared back at him. Cosmo's lip quivered as he raised the eraser. This was supposed to be easy? Well it wasn't. He didn't think he could do this. He choked back tears, and was about to click the eraser, when he heard Timmy's voice.
"Y-yeah Timmy?" Cosmo stammered.
"Before you do this, I want one last wish. I wish that you would never tell Poof about me. I don't want him to go out looking for me, it'd only upset him if he found out he could never see me again." Cosmo smiled and nodded, putting on goggles for protection.
Timmy smiled, "Thank you." he whispered. A bulb flashed, and he fell asleep.
Cosmo stepped off the bus to Fairy World, spotting Wanda and Poof almost immediately. Wanda looked at him with questioning eyes. Cosmo nodded, passing the memory eraser over to Jorgen, who was also standing nearby, waiting. Cosmo put one hand on his wife's shoulder, and the three fairies walked back into Fairy World.