This is very loosely inspired by the show The Real World. Thanks for reading!
Captain Jack Sparrow enters through a window, "First one here, means I get to pick me bed first!" he says, and begins searching around cautiously. He walks into a room, and spies a bed that is shaped like a ship, and the room is blue like the ocean. Obviously, he chooses it as his room. As Jack checks out his new digs, someone else enters the house. "Hello? Anyone here?" Elizabeth Swann, excuse me, Elizabeth Turner, calls out. She has many suitcases. Jack peeks his head out his bedroom door, "Lizabeth?" Jack asks, very confused.
"Jack!" Elizabeth exclaims, followed by a moment of awkward silence.
"Yer not a pirate! And..and I know you!" Jack points out.
"Is this a joke?" Elizabeth asks, ready to laugh.
"Maybe there was a.." Jack begins, but is interrupted, by a new member coming into the house.
A man enters the house, he looks like William Turner.
"Will?" Elizabeth asks, and squints her eyes.
"Elizabeth!" Will yells out, and runs over and gives her a hug.
"What are you doing here?" If only Elizabeth sounded as excited.
"Well..I heard they were looking for a cast of pirates and well..here I am!" Will says excitedly.
Jack is rummaging through cupboards, the fridge, and closets, to find some rum, when he notices his favorite person, William.
"Oh no." Jack mutters.
"Jack. What is Jack doing here?" Will turns to Elizabeth.
Jack makes his way over to Will, "What am I doin' here? What are you doin' here? Yer not a pirate!"
"I'm just as piratey as you, after all, I put up with you for what felt like forever." Will says very seriously.
Suddenly Elizabeth talks, "Maybe we are the last pirates left?"
Jack and Will stare at Elizabeth, unsure of what she is talking about. Just when Jack and Will start glaring at each other, the door opens once again.
"Tia Dalma! How nice to see you! Yer lookin'...now that yer here, get us out of here." Jack smiles.
"Jack, calm down, at least we all know each other. Maybe it won't be so bad.." Elizabeth mentions.
"Easy for you to say, you already killed me once before!"
"Oh my God, are you STILL talking about that?" Elizabeth asks Jack.
"Okay okay, everyone relax. There was obviously a mistake." Will insists.
"Of course there was, yer suppose' to be Captain of the Flyin' Dutchman! Now we are all goin' to be sufferin' in the locker!" Jack reminds him.
"That's not even what the curse states." Will says.
"Does anybody know what the bloody curse states?" Jack asks, looking around.
"Not really.." says Will.
"No." says Elizabeth.
"Ey, I tink I made it up as I went along..." Tia explains.
"Great." Jack says sarcastically.
The door opens again, and this time it is James Norrington, with wig and all. Everyone stops and stares, "You're definitely not a pirate!" they shout.
"Yes, I know. I pulled some strings." James explains.
Elizabeth smiles, "James! I thought you died."
"No. It was just a little scratch. I'm fine now." James smiles.
"That's strange, I'm pretty sure you were stabbed with a sword. Anyway, its good to see you." Elizabeth looks at James.
"It's good to see you as well, Elizabeth." James states.
Will is not having it, and rolls his eyes.
"Well, this is lovely." Jack jokingly says.
"Now that we are all here, where exactly is the rum?" he asks.
"First of all we aren't all here, and I thought you wanted to get out of here. I'm not stopping you." Will corrects him.
"Will, mate. I do want to get me self out of here. However, I NEED SOME BLOODY RUM FIRST!" Jack shouts.
"Ay everyone!" Anamaria says, entering the house.
"Oh, hi." Elizabeth glares.
"Hello." Will smiles.
"Yes, hello." James says, not recognizing her.
Tia sits on the couch, cross legged, staring at the others in the house.
"Thank goodness yer here mate! I was about too.." Jack trails off.
"Whats with the change in mood, Jack?" Will asks.
"Well maybe it won't be so bad. After all, there are WOMEN here." Jack points out.
"Well there are two women here, and one happens to be Elizabeth, which doesn't count." Will explains.
"What is that supposed to mean? Tia is here as well, remember?" Elizabeth asks.
"Sure, her too." Will mumbles.
"Well, I was just saying, that, well Jack was like, there are women here, emphasis on women, and I thought he was talking about you too and you and I are kind of together and.." Will tries to explain.
"Will, I can handle myself fine, thank you." Elizabeth glares, and crosses her arms.
"There are only six of us here, where is the last person?" James asks.
Just then, a monkey comes flying through the door.
"Isn't that..we have a monkey for a roommate?" Jack smirks.
"That is what it looks like." Will says.
"I was'n talkin' about you Will. I mean the one that just came through the door." Jack points.
"I hate you already. Does this mean Barbossa is coming?" asks Will.
"NO! I will not be living with a bunch of gross pirates." Elizabeth sits down, not realizing she just sat down next to Tia.
"But that is what you signed up for, and we kind of are all gross pirates." Will explains.
"Oh. Yeah. Well, I still don't think it could be him."
"If it is, it will be exist, stage left for meself." Jack says.
Suddenly, a voice is heard over everyone's head, it is saying "Jack Sparrow."
"What was that?" Jack's eyes become wide.
"OH MY GOD ITS DAVY JONES!" Will yells.
"I TOLD YOU! YER GONNA BE THE DEATH OF US YOU EUNUCH!" Jack shouts to Will, ready to strangle him.
James calmly walks towards Davy, "Mr. Jones, what are you doing here?" he asks.
"Not that any one of us being here makes sense, but yer supposed to be dead or somethin'." Jack makes a face.
"Yes, and you're getting everything all wet with that bucket." Elizabeth motions to the floor.
"Aye! I don't even know who you are." Ana says.
"Nice to meet you." Davy says in an upbeat tone.
"Norrington, I killed you, why aren't you in the locker wasting away?" Davy asks him.
"Well, it just so happens I was saved." Norrington says happily.
"Yes, I said that."
"Davy Jones." Tia gets up from the couch.
"Calypso.." Davy repsonds.
"I thought her name was Tia?" Ana asks, because she has no idea what is going on.
"Long story." Jack whispers to Ana.
"Jack, you were the first one here, where are the bedrooms?" Elizabeth changes the subject.
"Why? Want to join me?" Jack asks with a smirk.
"You're repulsive." she fires back.
"C'mon Elizabeth, we will find them ourselves." Will says, grabbing Elizabeth's arm.
After things calmed down...somewhat...and after a few brawls over who had control of the remote, they headed to bed, but first checked out the confessional.
"I can't believe I'm stuck here with these whelps, Davy Jones even." Jack began, "he can't hear me in here right?" he says, as he looks around, "also, where in the bloody hell is the rum? I looked in the cabinets, the ice box, under the couch, and whatever that thing with the buttons is in the kitchen, and there is nothing! It has something to do with Elizabeth, has too. She is going to be the death of us, her and that eunuch boy. Who put this shindig together anyway? We aren't supposed to know each other. I was coming into this situation thinking there were going to be cutthroats and strumpets. Oh bloody whatever."
"Well, I really don't know what to say. I mean, I'm glad I get to be with Will again. I don't understand why he came here though. He kind of lied to me, and I lied to him too. HOW IS THIS RELATIONSHIP GOING TO WORK WHEN WE LIE TO EACH OTHER?" Elizabeth asks herself, "whatever, maybe it will all work itself out, it has too. Then there is Jack and its like, what are you doing here? I thought you were trying to find the youth fountain or whatever, you know? I'm worried that Davy Jones is after Will because of that stupid curse that none of us understand. Which reminds me, Tia Dalma, Calypso, whatever her stupid name is. What is she even doing here? Why doesn't she just go crawl back under a rock? Does she even know what she is talking about with anything? Then there is Anamaria, I barely even remember her. She like, wasn't even there when we did the heart stuff. Where did she even go? She abandoned everyone is what she did. I thought I was supposed to be the only girl, that is what they told me. Ugh, whatever. I'm so over it."
"Hm. Well, I really love Elizabeth. I mean I really do. Why did she come here though? " Will asks himself, "she was supposed to be waiting for me. I know I kinda came here instead of doing that duty thing or whatever it was, but that doesn't count, because I mean, I didn't even understand what I was supposed to do, and why would James come here? Maybe he set this up. Maybe he knew Elizabeth would be here. I hate that guy. At least Elizabeth is staying in my room."
"I get the feeling that no one cares about me here." says James, "I just need somewhere to sleep, someone of my rank should not be sleeping on the couch. What will people think? Elizabeth looks lovely, its a shame William is here. I hate that guy, I wish I could stab him in the heart with my sword. They won't let us have swords."
"Der is a destiny about dat James Norrington, I tink he is gonna be Captain of the Flying Dutchman..." Tia begins, before her mic gets cut off because no one knows what she is talking about.