"What in the bloody hell are you doin' here?" Jack asked.
"What? Didn't plan on seein' me?" Barbossa replied.
"No." Everyone replied.
"Please do not tell me you are stayin' here." Jack pleaded.
"Why hello Mr. and Mrs. Turner." Barbossa greeted.
"Hello, Barbossa. We weren't expecting you to uh, stop by..." Elizabeth said.
"Oh, I'm not stopin' by. I'm stayin' here." Barbossa corrected.
William rolled his eyes, and sighed.
"Oh, well that's lovely. William and I will tell you everything. After all, you did marry us." Elizabeth said.
"Wait, why is Mr. Turner here?" Barbossa asked.
"Well..." Elizabeth sighed.
"I didn't want to do my duty okay? It really sucks." William said, "I want everyone to stop hassling me about it."
"You coulda told us that before Jack made you stab the heart." Barbossa started to laugh, "Right Jack?"
"Aye..." Jack muttered.
"William is feeling a little under the weather, don't mind him. Why don't you sit down." Elizabeth said.
Ana and Jack looked at each other.
"When is she gonna stop actin' like that?" Jack whispered.
"I dunno." Ana replied.
"It was a long Journey here." Barbossa said, sitting down, "By the way Jack, why aren't you with your precious pearl?"
"It's in a teeny tiny bottle, and I can't get it out, alright?" Jack said.
"This sounds like a new movie. Will you need me this time?" Ana asked, "Please oh please say yes." she begged.
"No, I already have a lady friend, you will not be needed." Jack waved her off.
"Lady friend?" Ana asked.
"What? Jack, you have a lady friend?" Elizabeth chimed in.
"Oh, here we go.." Jack said, "Ladies, ladies, of course! What is a pirate without a lady friend, no offense there Barb.." Jack grinned.
"Well, who is it?" Elizabeth asked.
"None of your business." Jack said, turning his back.
"Tell me, I must know." Elizabeth said.
"Well...if you really must know, it's Angelica Teach. Never heard of her aye? Yes, well, it's nothing, really." Jack said.
"Aye, I've heard of her. She's a real pirate." Ana nodded.
"This is utter nonsense. What about me? I am the best female pirate there ever was." Elizabeth said.
"Elizabeth, you gave up that life, remember? You have a son somewhere you aren't taking care of." Jack explained.
"Excuse me, may I say something?" James asked.
"No!" Everyone shouts.
"Okay, first of all! Jack, you love me, every man I've ever come in contact with loves me! And you William, you left me alone with some child, while you are off doing who knows what, while everyone thinks you are doing some marvelous duty!" Elizabeth yelled.
"Not this again.." William said.
The door opens again, and a female emerged.
"Hello!" Angelica yelled, "Sorry I'm late, but I had some curses to do."
"Who in God's name is that?" William asked.
"Yes! Stop right there! Tell me your name before you go any further!" Elizabeth yelled, pulling out an umbrella to use as a sword.
"Oh my." James says, putting his head in his hand.
"Stop, everyone stop!" Jack yelled, putting his hands in the air.
"What are yew doin' here?" Jack asked, "Go back from where you came."
"No." Angelica said, "Hello, miss, my name is Angelica."
"Get out! I hate you!" Elizabeth yelled, trying to stab her with the umbrella.
"What are you tryin' to do there, lady? Do you really think you could beat me in a fight?" Angelica asked.
"I-I'm sure of it!" Elizabeth said.
"Fine. Huzza!" Angelica grabbed another umbrella.
They began fighting, knocking everything in their path over, as everyone else ducked and covered.
"Oh dear." James said, hiding under the coffee table.
"This is just wrong." William said, next to James, "But Angelica is fairly attractive, huh?"
James squinted back at him, "Sure.."
"Look at what you did." Ana said to Jack, they were hiding behind the kitchen counter.
"What did I do?" Jack asked, "See what happens when I tell the truth?"
"It happens when you don't tell the truth as well." Ana said.
"Where is me damn monkey?" Barbossa asked, walking around the room.
"I'm the only female pirate in this franchise sweetie!" Elizabeth yelled, swinging.
"Not anymore! You're a lost cause, sister!" Angelica yelled back.
"Take that, and that!" Elizabeth swung.
"You're not even hittin' me, you wench!" Angelica laughed.
"Hey, I'm enjoying this." William smiled.
"Oh shut up, you eunuch." James said.
William shot him a dirty look.
"You look like a sleazy whore!" Elizabeth yelled, standing on the couch.
"And you look like a Mary-Sue!" Angelica said, almost hitting Elizabeth with her umbrella.
"That's it!" Elizabeth said, jumping on Angelica.
"Now they are rolling around." William said.
"Hm, listen, William. I think we both love the same woman." James said.
"Oh, I don't love her, I just said she was attractive." William nodded.
"No, no, I mean Elizabeth." James said.
"Listen, James, it isn't going to happen. We are married." William said.
"That's exactly what I was going to say." James said, "Why not let bygones be bygones, how would you like to go for a, um, a walk with me?" James asked.
"That's strange, a walk? Why?" William asked.
"Er, so Elizabeth can see that we are no longer enemies, and everything is well." James smiled.
"Okay, I guess I can understand that." William nodded in agreement.
Elizabeth and Angelica were both sprawled out on the floor.
"Elizabeth, James and I are going for a walk." William said, getting out from under the table.
"Okay, don't be long." Elizabeth said, panting on the floor.
"Truce?" Angelica asked.
"Fine, truce." Elizabeth said.
"Can we get out now?" Ana asked.
Elizabeth slowly got up, and brushed herself off.
"Well, now that the house is a mess, what are we gonna do?" Angelica asked.
"Well...we do have new roommate." Ana smirked.
"So?" Elizabeth sighed.
"Let's go to Tortuga!" Ana exclaimed.
"You know, now that I think about it, it's really very silly. Why would I love Elizabeth?" James laughed.
"Yes, you two really don't make a good couple." William laughed.
"Absolutely, and she runs around with pirates everywhere, and practically looks like a wench." James smiled.
"Hey, she's not a wench." William said, angrily.
"No, no, of course not, did I say wench? I meant a bench." James said.
"That makes no sense." William stated.
"No, it doesn't, does it?" James smiled, "Anyway, William, this is going to be the beginning of a beautiful friendship I believe."
"I hope so. It's about time." William said, "Where are we going, anyway?"
"Just to a friend's house." James smirked.
"You have friends?" William asked.
"Of course I do. I've met many a person here." James said, "It will be good for us to get away from all the hub bub, won't it?"
"I suppose it will." William smiled.
Elizabeth and Ana sat at the bar, drinking rum.
"Hey, have you seen William anywhere?" Elizabeth asked.
"He went on a walk wit James." Ana said.
"What? When did that happen?" Elizabeth asked.
"Earlier, do you pay attention to anything he does?" Ana asked.
"That's odd. They hate each other. I guess he will be alright. It's dark out." Elizabeth said.
"Now, listen, Angelica." Jack said, "You are me favorite wen- I mean lady, that I ever met, really you are." he nodded.
"I'm supposed to believe that?" Angelica huffed.
"Ana-Maria, and t-that what's her face, Elizabeth? How could they ever mean anything to a real pirate like me?" Jack laughed.
"I don't know, Elizabeth seems to have a liking to you." Angelica said.
"Yes, well, I'm charming at times, it's hard not to love me." Jack said.
"Charming? You're a dog." Angelica sneared.
"That hurts." Jack said, "But really, how did you get here? I thought I left you on that island?"
"Dolphens." Angelica smiled.
"Dolphens, I must try that sometime." Jack said.
"Now, William. You wait out here, let me go inside, and see if anyone is home, my friends don't like when people they don't know just show up." James said, walking over to the door.
"Oh, um, okay." William said.
The door opened slightly, and an eye peeked out.
"I have him outside." James whispered.
The man nodded, and shut the door.
"James walked back over to William, "It will just be a minute, I guess the place is a mess." he smiled.
William smiled back, and then suddenly everything went dark for him. His head was covered by something, and he was forced into the house.
James smiled, and began walking back to the house.
"I tink I'm your side Liz." Ana said.
"What do you mean you're on my side?" Elizabeth asked.
"I don't like that girl, Angelica, she's taking all the spotlight off of us." Ana frowned.
"We must rid of her." Elizabeth grinned.
"How are we gonna do that? She'll turn us into toads or somethin'." Ana said.
"Let's just get her drunk, and see what happens." Elizabeth smiled.
Elizabeth and Ana walked over to Jack and Angelica.
"Let me buy you a drink for all the trouble I caused you." Elizabeth smiled.
"Fine." Angelica said, taking another drink.
"Want another one?" Elizabeth asked.
"Alright then, but you better get me away from Jack." Angelica laughed.
"Oh yes, we will get you away from Jack." Elizabeth smirked.
"Elizabeth! Elizabeth!" James said, running over, "I was looking for you!"
"James, what in the world do you want, I-I'm busy." Elizabeth spatted.
"No, it's serious, William is dead!" James yelled.
"Wait a minute. Stop everything." Jack said, "Now. Is this, turning blue, not breathing, in the ground death, or is this somewhat alive, somewhat dead, here or there, there or here, silly curse, voodoo, spell death?" Jack asked.
"Um, he's dead, really dead." James said.
"Great! Let's celebrate, rum for all!" Jack exclaimed.
"When, where, how? What?" Elizabeth said.
"The cult got him, and killed him, I saw it all." James said.
"What!" Elizabeth screamed.
"He's dead. There's nothing anyone can do. I tried to save him." James shrugged.
Elizabeth began to stare, and then squatted down, "What in the world am I to do? My life is now pointless."
"No! It's not pointless, remember, you didn't really love him, you thought he was boring." James said.
"Well, well, yes, that's true..." Elizabeth stood up, staring, "But things were starting to get better."
"Wait a minute, what cult? You mean that stupid made up thing you both went on about?" Ana asked.
"It's not made up. They killed him, and they almost killed me that one time." James said.
"JAMES YOU STUPID JERK, WHY DIDN'T YOU SAVE HIM!" Elizabeth began to beat on James.
"I'm extremely drunk." Angelica laughed, "Who's William, anyway?"
"I'm sorry Elizabeth! It was hopeless!" James said.
"Yes, yes, hopeless. That is my life now...hopeless." Elizabeth cried, "I'm going to go home now, and sit in the dark..."
"Wait, Elizabeth, no.." James tried to stop her.
"Nice try James." Jack said, "He's not really dead is he?"
"Well, I don't know, he could be technically, but I didn't actually witness anything." James said.
"Now look what you done, Elizabeth is goin' to spend the rest of the time bein' miserable, sulkin' in her room. You really messed things up this time." Jack laughed.
"She will come around. Now that he is gone, she will realize she loves me." James smiled.
"Yeah, sure." Jack said.
Elizabeth sat in her dark room, alone.
"Hello, Elizabeth." James said, returning home.
"La la la la la.." Elizabeth sang, sitting on her bed.
"I said, hello Elizabeth." James said.
"LA LA LA LA LA LA.." Elizabeth sang.
"Oh dear..." James said.
"What is wrong with her?" Ana asked.
"I..I think she has gone mad." James said, "Elizabeth, I'm sorry for what has happened. William may be gone, but you still have me, a-and the others."
"La la la la ..."
"Elizabeth, I love you!" James said, "I always have, and I always will! I'm sorry things have gotten to this point, but I love you!"
"Oh God.." Ana walked away.
"La la la la.."
"If only you married me, none of this would happen!" James said.
"Married." Elizabeth said.
"What?" James asked.
"Yes, let's get married. Right now." Elizabeth said.
"But you were just catatonic." James said.
"C'mon James, let's go." Elizabeth said, grabbing his arm.
"Everyone! Everyone! Jack and Angelica stop fooling around on the couch, and Ana shut up for two seconds!" Elizabeth tried to get everyone's attention.
Everyone stopped, and looked.
"James and I are to be married!" Elizabeth said.
"But you can't do that." Ana said.
"Yes I can, and I am!" Elizabeth smiled.
Jack pushed Angelica off the couch, "And when might I ask is this little celebration goin' to happen?"
"Tomorrow morning!" Elizabeth replied.