My second Quiz Show 2 fanfic! YAY! I think I may or may not write another story that takes place after Honma is released from jail in years to come. What do you think? Should I? I'm pretty sure if I do, that one will have actual Honma/Kamiyama and maybe be even multi-chaptered? XD Please tell me what you think! Don't forget to review!
Disclaimer: I own nothing, though I wouldn't mind owning either Yokoyama or Sakurai. ;P
He didn't know why he had turned himself in, not really. Of course, there wasn't much else he could've done as it had been revealed on live television that he had killed Misaki. Even if he hadn't turned himself in after that, it would've only been a matter of time before he was arrested anyways.
There was a slight pain in his chest still at the newly remembered memory. He almost wished that Kamiyama had been the one to kill her, but then—another part of him felt it was wrong to wish that on another person, especially Kamiyama.
He had put Kamiyama through so much, and for what? For a reason that wasn't even actually real? Because of a memory that had never been a true, real memory but was in fact a substitute for the real—even more painful—memory? Honma felt disgusted with himself for how he had treated Kamiyama. The other man—his former friend—had been treated like a prisoner by him, locked up in a white room with nothing to do but to sit and to remember what he had done to Misaki.
Except, Kamiyama had never done anything to Misaki but accept that she had been in love with Honma and not himself and had such remembered the "memory" that Honma had forced himself to replace in his real memory just to ease his pain slightly.
He had told the other man that he would take care of him, give him a place to stay and food because he was the only thing Kamiyama had and Kamiyama accepted that but found himself locked up and screamed at to remember instead.
Honma glared down at the floor in his cell, hands clenching into fists. He was thankful he had the cell to himself, maybe being the director of a rather famous quiz show had its perks. He scoffed at that. Yeah, like remember the fact that you had killed the only person in the world that you loved, the only person who had meant more to you than anything else.
Footsteps echoed outside of his cell and Honma glanced up, eyes automatically shooting toward the dark haired man standing slightly behind the guard. "You have a visitor. He insisted you wouldn't do anything to him," the guard explained as he opened the cell door.
"He's not dangerous," Kamiyama stated firmly when the guard shot him a look.
"Right, and that's why he's in here for murder," the man scoffed and Honma frowned, glaring slightly as the cell door slid shut once more behind Kamiyama and the guard went to stand a few feet away, leaving the two to talk alone.
Kamiyama looked around, a small frown on his face. "It seems… our situations are reversed, Honma-san,"
"San?" Honma gave him an incredulous look.
"It's a habit…" the former quiz show host stated dryly, looking at his old friend. "I thought I'd see how you were. You didn't tell me you were going to turn yourself in,"
"I didn't have much of a choice," Honma leaned back against the wall. "It was either that or wait for the police to come find me, after all, I did admit to murder on live television,"
Kamiyama bit at his lip, looking as if he felt awkward at not being the one locked up. "I found out my parents died about a year after… after I fell,"
It was silent for a moment before Honma gave a small, quick nod. "Aa, had they not, none of this would've ever happened as you would've had to go with them instead of me, most probably," his dark, slightly cold eyes stared across at his former "friend". "Of course, I probably would've just come up with a different way to get you to… remember what you had done,"
Sighing, Kamiyama took a few steps closer that he was only three feet away from him and Honma shifted where he stood, suddenly feeling a bit uncomfortable. "I don't blame you for what you did, Honma-san, I'm sure a lot of people would've done it. It was painful for me too, you know, remember both… so-called memories. On one hand, I had killed the girl we both loved because she loved you," his voice choked up slightly at that. "And on the other… you killed her because you thought she didn't love and you wanted to be with her, even if that meant death," Kamiyama forced his eyes shut as tears fought their way to the front of them.
Honma merely frowned and looked away.
"Do you know how painful that particular one was for me to remember? How much it hurt to remember what had actually happened, Honma-san?" Kamiyama questioned and Honma gave him a slightly surprised look before averting his eyes again. "At least you never thought of me as a friend, I—on the other hand—truly felt as if you were my best friend and knowing that… that you were going to kill yourself and leave me alone to bear the weight of both my best friends dying… that nearly killed me as soon as I realized you had gone to the roof to jump, Honma-san, did you know that?"
Honma clenched his jaw. "And yet, I stayed by your bed for six years hoping you would wake up, Kamiyama," he growled the name slightly, sort of how he would whenever he would scream at Kamiyama to remember, how he would have to fight back the urge to slam Kamiyama against the wall, to hit him, and to throw him back onto the cold, hard ground.
"And why is that, Honma-san?" Kamiyama asked honestly, curiously and with a desperate look on his face. He just wanted to understand because there was so much he didn't understand and it was horrible not being able to! Why had Honma been there with him for six years when Honma himself said he had never thought of him as a friend?
"I…" he glared up at the ceiling, honestly wishing he knew. He knew himself that it didn't make sense; what he had done. Kamiyama was nothing to him, so why had he hoped he would wake up so very badly? "Because you are the only person who knows how much it hurts to lose Misaki…" he said without thinking, his throat constricting tightly. "You are the only person who even cared that she died, even if you didn't remember it for so long after you had woken up,"
He glanced over at Kamiyama who was now silently crying, tears rolling down his cheeks and Honma forced his own back, not wanting to appear as weak as he had before. Honma had cried enough for one life time.
Kamiyama licked at his lips, not bothering to wipe away his tears as he stared over at him. "Honma-san…" he choked on his words but it didn't make much of a difference. At this point, Kamiyama honestly had no clue what to say.
There was silence for a minute or so before the cell door was rattled and Kamiyama jumped at the abrupt voice. "Time to go, kid," Kamiyama didn't bother telling the man he was twenty-eight years old.
The former show host looked at his… for lack of a better word, friend before sighing and nodding. "I'll… see you again, Honma-san," he bowed his head before turning and walking over to the door. Kamiyama turned and looked over his shoulder before biting his lip and leaving once he realized that Honma was not going to say anything more.
Honma remained where he stood until the footsteps disappeared off into the distance and before he realized it, he was crouching on the floor, head in his hands as he sobbed, wondering if Kamiyama truly meant what he said about seeing him again.
He wondered if he had just seen the only person who could understand what he felt for the last time.