It rains this afternoon as I walk home from school. It was the only thing I could ever feel close to, spiritually. I was, in a way, like the rain that poured down. I was very sad and lonely but also hiding a pain no one thought I could feel.
My life at home was always so awful. At first, my dad never paid attention to me and my mom was all I had. Until I grew to the age of 13, my dad began beating me.
Whether it was something huge or something less, I was punished without mercy. My mom never even tried to stop my dad from beating me. All she'd do was drink from a big bottle of beer and watch tv all day long. I wondered how she never grew fat but she seemed to keep a slinder image.
The only good thing in my life was the neighborhood I lived in and even that still hurts me to look at. It looks so idealic, peaceful, and clam. And behind my house's doors was abuse after abuse.
If I had bled, I'd have to clean my blood up and heal my own wounds. If I cried it would be worse because he'd hit harder. He was a person who would only hit the child and not rape them. He had Mom for that and he thought less of me to do that to.
Every day, I live in fear, sadness, and hate. I once tried to tell someone of the abuse but they never believed me. Dad was known as a nice man to the community and at work.
Everyone just looks down upon me for being anti-social and into goth and emo. I'm not with the stereotype but I am very suicidal. So much I want to be away from this place especially my family. I was told, though, if I killed myself that I'd end up in Hell. Either way, I was in a no win-lose situation.
Sometimes, I'd go to the cemetery and talk to the dead people, saying how lucky they are to not be in my place. To make things worse on my life, everyone at my school makes fun of me for being different and to myself. So, I can never get a break from life.
And today, with the rain drizzling on my short dark brown hair and pale face, I don't bother to put my hood on. What's the point if I'm only going to get wet a little? Besides, I like the rain in cold October.
It almost made me smile but I soon remembered what I'd come home to. I let a tear slip down my cheek as I passed the last street corner towards my house.
Suddenly, I heard a small voice hiss at me. I looked over and saw a homeless man in an alley. I looked around and noticed I was the only one on the street.
I walked towards the man causiously.
"Did you want to talk to me?"
"What's your pleasure?"
"Excuse me?" Is this guy asking me what my interest in sex is? I suddenly felt nervous being near him.
He then held out this strange box towards me. It had weird golden designs all over it and looked delicate if touched.
"What is it?" I asked.
"Your every desire." He thrusted the small box to me, "Take it."
"I-I can't. My parents will-"
"It doesn't matter. Just take it and you will be satisfied." He put it in my hand and walked off.
I didn't want to be rude and leave the box on the ground. I also didn't want to take it with me in case my dad thought I stole it or it was a worthless object for me to possess.
I took it with me anyways and headed back home. I couldn't see how this box was going to help me at all. Just looking at it made it seem to be no more than a fancy rubix cube.
As I appraoched home, I held the box to my chest and hoped that they would not wonder about the box.