Author's Note: Okay, I have to write down this one-shot before it escapes my head

Disclaimer – I is not for own Code Geass


Guilt.

Would that explain how Lelouch was feeling right now? He damn sure felt like it. But there was something else as well, something he couldn't explain, something beyond the great prodigy's comprehension.

He grunted, suckling on the girl's neck. The bed sheets left in a mess due to their movements. He couldn't believe he was doing this. He, Lelouch Vi Britannia, was with an innocent girl. He was hurting her. He was destroying her. He was….he was…

He was confiding in her.

Funny how the man who rips a father away from an innocent girl, seeks refugee in that same girl. The heartless, cold leader of the black knights was seeking protection from a school girl. He stared down at the orange haired beauty, the bathrobe elegantly covering her body. He was protecting himself and hurting her. Not only was it bad enough he took advantage of her, that he took away her father. But now he was taking away her purity.

He pushed his lips against hers, pushing his tongue inside. Breaking apart, he hovered over the girl again. Looking down to her clamped eyes and her tinted cheeks. How did it come to this? Lelouch recalled. How did I end up here? Lelouch grunted again, returning to the girl's neck.

He knew the answer.


"She's probably gone, eh?" Lelouch sighed, putting away his phone.

He walked towards the theatre, the umbrella covering him.

"Anyhow, his is just the beginning," He thought, "The Order of The Black Knights is finally becoming the organization I envisioned."

The organization that will create an ideal world, and will be the end of Britannia. Those thoughts ended simultaneously with his footsteps, as he looked ahead to the drenched woman. Jogging to her he placed the umbrella over her. Staring at her ducked head he spoke.

"Um, I'm sorry I'm late," He apologized, "I thought you already left."

She stayed silent, the heavily falling rain being the only sound entering Lelouch's ears, "But more importantly is there anywhere we can take shelter from the rain?"

"Say Lelou," She started, "Zero is a friend to the weak, isn't he?"

Lelouch was a bit startled, she would think so right? Zero did in fact save her, "Y-yeah, that's what he said at least."

"Then…" Her shaky voice started, "Why did he kill my dad?"

The prince's heart stopped, killed? Her father? That isn't possible, how could-

Then it hit him, the rockslide, if he was working there he could've been…

"My dad was so kind," She whimpered, raising her head, "He never hurt me in anger, he never did anything bad."

He stared at her tear drenched face, the rain being distinguishable. How long was she waiting here? How long… was she crying for?

"But he was killed, he suffocated," She cried, raising her head higher, "Why my dad? I…I don't believe it! I can't believe it!"

Lelouch let the umbrella slip out of his hands as the girl cried into his shoulder. What was he supposed to do? How could he possibly do anything at all?

"Please…Lelou…" She pleaded, her face drawing closer, "Help…me…"

Lelouch didn't think he had control over his body as his arms wrapped around her.

What was he doing?

He didn't think while he moved his face closer.

He was only hurting her more.

He couldn't feel anything else but the soft lips on his.

But then why couldn't he stop.


Pulling apart his lips he stared inventively at the girl. She was returning the action, tears still staining her face. He was going to help her. Going to save her. Going to protect her.

He picked up the umbrella and her purse from the ground, taking her hand and pulling her forward. Receiving a startled expression from the girl. He made sure the umbrella was covering her completely. He didn't need to see any more water running down her face.

Arriving at the motel, he got her a seat. Heading towards the counter.

"A room for two." He asked.

The woman nodded, handing him some keys, "Second floor, third room on the right."

Muttering thanks, he took the girl's hand again and led her to the room. Upon entering, he placed the umbrella on the floor and her purse on the table.

"Take a shower, your soaking wet." He told, receiving a slight nod.

The girl exited from the bathroom, a bathrobe wrapped around her. He slipped past her entering the bathroom himself.

"I'll be out soon." He said, closing the door behind him.

Exiting in another bathrobe, he looked over to the bed, which the orange haired teen was sitting on. He sat down next to her, placing a hand on hers. She flinched from the contact. She hadn't noticed him before.

"W-welcome back." She stuttered.

He didn't respond, he just stared into her eyes. Her innocent, hurt, and soon to be tainted eyes.

"You don't have to hold anything back." He consoled.

He received a strange look from the girl, "I-I'm fine, really-"

"Don't lie," The prince ordered, "I'm here now."

He got off the bed and kneeled in front of her, "I'm going to help you…"

Lelouch tangled his fingers with hers, leaning in closer.

I'm going to help you…

He placed on hand on the back of her head.

I'm going to save you…

His breath was drawing unto her.

I'm going to protect you…

The man's lips pressed against the woman's, his hand pushing them closer together. He didn't know about the woman's reaction, only that she complied, wrapping her arms around his neck, as he pushed her down on the bed.

I'm going to hurt you…


Lelouch stared with guilt at the coffin being buried. At the man who was killed. At the man he killed. His heart dropped as he watched the teary woman fall to her knees. Crying over the loss of her husband. Shirley consoled her mother. How could she? How could she possibly try to mend a heart, when hers was already in peril?

After the funeral, she walked to us. Her face plastered with a fake smile, trying to assure us she was alright. He knew she wasn't, it wasn't even a question. Milly rushed the rest of the group off, giving the two of us privacy. He didn't know whether to be grateful, or hate the fact she did. How could be keep his promise of helping her? Of saving her. Of protecting her. When all he does is hurt her?

"Lelou…" She whispered, "A-about last night…sorry…"

Sorry? Why was she apologizing? He should be the one begging for mercy at her feet this moment. Yet here she was, asking for his forgiveness.

"I-I took advantage of you…I had no right to do what I did…" She said, "Forgive me…"

The girl turned around and began to walk. Lelouch wasn't sure what force made him reach his hand out and grab the girls. Probably the same force that made him grab her hand yesterday. He stared at her with narrowed eyes, meeting with her open, questioning ones. He brought her closer and wrapped his arms around her. Pushing her head into his chest.

"I told you, I'm here now," He stated, "I'm going to help you."

If only he could make himself believe it.

The orange haired teen's eyes watered, her hands grasping the cloth on the man's back. She didn't want to hold back. She couldn't hold back. She mourned and whelped into him. Lelouch just grasped her more, hoping that somehow, he could pay her back. That he could expect her to forgive him.

That he could forgive himself.


Lelouch threw water at the back of his neck. Hoping the cold water would wash away his sins. Hoping that anything could wash away his sins. He was interrupted when a certain pilot entered the warehouse.

"Who is it?" He called out, turning his head away.

"Z-zero! It's me…" The ace answered.

"What do you need?" He asked, the shadow being his cover.

"I was just wondering…is what we're doing right?" She questioned.

Lelouch wondered how many times he asked himself the exact same question. About how much question one life threw into his resolve.

"You're thinking about leaving," He deducted, "Go ahead. It's not too late, I won't stop you."

"N-no! I…I'll stay." She announced.

Lelouch chuckled, "Thank you.


"Will you kill her?"

The man stared at the witch entity seated before him. For a second, he wanted to roar the most profane sentence he could muster at her. But then he thought about it, if she did know who Zero was. Would he kill her? No! He couldn't. He can't. But he was already killing her.

Killing her soul.


"What did you do to Shirley!" The prince yelped, "Did you shoot Shirley? Did you…kill Shirley?"

If he killed her, he would destroy him. Make him feel sorry that he ever existed.

"Of course not!" The Geass user assured, a certain girl appearing in the window behind them, "Now let's play the penalty game shall we?"


"But I shot you Lelou!" The girl screamed, hugging him deeply.

"Forget that! Wash your sins on me." He said.

I already have quite a few; it doesn't hurt for me to gain more.

"How can I!" She screamed.

"I'll make you forget…everything," He stated, "Just know that I'm sorry, if I could re-do it I'd-"

I'd save your father, I'd protect you…

I'd keep my vows.


"Did you lose a family member too?"

Lelouch smiled at the woman, "Not a family member, but a friend, a precious friend."

"Losing someone makes you think a lot right? How you'll never see her smile again, how you'll never argue or laugh together." He spoke.

Guess it's true, you never know what you have until it's gone.

"Don't worry; the sun will come up eventually. And a new day will start." The teen replied.

His sorrow filled eyes locked on her, even after all of this, she was still consoling him, still helping him, still protecting him.

"I guess you right," He started turning around, "And…thank you."


Two hours.

Two hours, thirty one minutes, since he lost her. It's for the best. This time he wasn't hurting her. This time he was keeping his promise. He was protecting her. The further away from him she was the better.

The safer.

"Do you love her?" The witch asked, biting into her pizza.

He let out a laugh, staring into the ceiling as he responded.

"Love is such a mysterious, awkward, strange – and accurate word."


*Tear drop*

I friggin wish

But we gotta be happy with what we got

Cya later guys, appreciate life :D

The one, the only – Lashloseus