I'm warning you: SPOILERS for FUNK (Season 1, ep. 21) ahead.

A/N: This is officially my first Glee fic, and I'm so freakin' excited about posting this. I've been working on a season 2 Wemma fic (my supposed first Glee fic), actually, but then I watched the Funk ep. yesterday and this idea just came to me- some sort of heaven sent, for that matter.

Thank God for this idea.

Five hours ago, I've accomplished this, and now that it's done- proofreading and editing and all- I'm glad to be sharing my take on Glee fics. Hope you enjoy!

A/N: HOLD IT RIGHT THERE. The above note was written in June, which was a few months ago, when I was supposed to post this fic. But this unreliable computer of mine won't let me post it; for some reason, it keeps on shutting itself down whenever I try to post this. (:|) Now, I'm giving it another shot, because I want y'all to be able to read it. Criticize whatever you want, just please REVIEW. Good and bad reviews are so welcome!


Summary: Will gives Sue a taste of her own medicine; she chokes and vomits it down his throat (not literally speaking) - how's that for revenge, eh? Here's my take on what would've happened if Will and Sue did make out.

**- are actual scenes from the Funk episode 1x21.


Always Comes Down To You, Loser

A Glee fic

He stood there, glaring at the pale blue eyes, seeing nothing beyond it- nothing- not even the slightest hint of emotion in Sue Sylvester's eyes.

She was playing her cards well, she knew- the glimmer of fear in Will Schuester's eyes was unmistakable. She knew he was dying to hear what the second option was… of course, Schuester wouldn't want to see that colossal trophy of mine in his lousy little choir room, thought Sue.

** "You could kiss me, right here"- she pointed to her lips (as though she believes Will is mentally challenged and doesn't fully understand her) - "on the lips… with tongue."

For two seconds Will looked affronted, then tense, with a muscle twitching madly in his jaw. "This is payback, isn't it?"

Sue narrowed her eyes but chose not to answer.

"No one will know?"

Still, Sue remained unmoving.

"Fine," growled Will, taking a step forward and closing the gap between him and his awful nemesis; he couldn't believe he was putting himself up to this- he felt like a slut-**

For the first time in the history of Sue Sylvester's life, her lips were shaking like it never did before; she has never shivered before- ever- and that was because nothing ever scared Sue Sylvester… Will's lips were merely centimeters from hers as he slowly continued to inch closer; she could feel the heat radiating from his body as he opened his mouth slightly, breathing in the air around her.

Should she back out, then? But there was barely time to back out- and Sue Sylvester never backs out-

At last, his lips were against hers- it was indescribable, unbelievable and unthinkable; no one in their right minds would believe this can ever happen.

Sue looked up at Will, who had his eyes shut really tight and whose face looked so hardened with grief and agony: somehow his facial expression amused her, but something other than amusement came right after- a stronger, unstoppable force-

Desire. They were scorching hot flames of desire that burnt their way across Sue Sylvester's body. It broke through her strength, her invincibility, her power to conceal all that she ever felt; the heat came out of her lips- out into Will Schuester-

He parted his lips, gingerly slipping his tongue out, which seemed to have taken on a mind of its own; suddenly he felt his own tongue forcing her mouth open and a second later, Sue's lips gave way. Now while their tongues wrestled and struggled against each other, Will moaned involuntarily; Sue had unconsciously tangled her fingers in his seemingly lubricated curly hair.

Incredibly, it went on like this in Will Schuester's apartment for quite a few minutes before-

"Sue," gasped Will, pulling away briefly to breathe, but Sue quickly grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and slammed her lips back into his. She grabbed him by the arms and directed him onto the couch, roughly pushing him down onto the throw pillows- all this time making sure that their lips never parted.

Through the whole seizing and pushing onto the couch Will's eyes were wide open, yet he refuse to believe that what he was seeing was happening at all. It didn't make sense, thought Will; but what didn't make sense was why he wasn't stopping Sue from continuing to kiss him….

Could he possibly be liking this?

Apparently, yes.

Sue meanwhile, decided to make the most out of this riveting make-out session with Will Schuester: her long, slender fingers- resting on his macho biceps- crept malevolently to the buttons on his shirt. As soon as her hands caught the top button- closest to Will's neck- she swiftly began ripping the buttons open until his bare chest was revealed to her, in full sight, completely displayed for her greedy eyes to feast on. She pulled away, frozen, in kneeling position on top of him while he panted, looking curiously from Sue to his exposed chest, feeling slightly embarrassed.

Gently this time, though, Sue reached out her hands and softly laid them on Will's chest, feeling the structure of the flesh and bones underneath the skin and the muscles which have been worked out so it made Will look undeniably sexy, running it down to his six-pack abs- the only thing in men that made Sue weak-

It was only then, she realized, that she had made herself vulnerable. Seeing herself on top of Will- with his chest exposed and her hands running all over it- a pang of disgust and disbelief soaked her savagely omnipotent reputation; again, for the first time in her entire life, Sue Sylvester was actually hating herself for letting Will see the worst of her….

She scrambled to get up on her feet- dusting off her track suit of traces of Will- making sure she didn't look into his eyes.

"Uh… Sue?" Will began tentatively, as he sat up and started buttoning his shirt. "You… um- you were actually pretty good." He gave a little laugh to ease the awkwardness.

Sue, however, looked seriously offended with Will's comment; instead of kindly accepting the rare dose of flattery she received, she turned back to face Will, her pale blue eyes seething with her irrational loathing for him.

"Good- 'pretty good'?" she hissed. "It's not just good, William, it's the best- the best because I, Sue Sylvester, am the best!" Will telling Sue she was just 'pretty good' set her back to her dark side, so it seems. "Now I may have time to mourn over your lack of taste in women, buddy, but you know I don't waste my time on men- especially on men who look like they could be wearing a badly damaged, used-up mop as a wig."

"Okay fine, whatever. Say what you want." Will rolled his eyes and wiped his mouth on his sleeve.

"I better go," said Sue harshly. "Before your fire alarm detects a champion burning with a passion for winning- good thing it doesn't detect failures like you, or it'll be going off the second you're in the premises." She eyed her Nationals trophy, glittering and sparkling in its endearing glory, before taking one last glance at Will, looking like a complete mess and whose shirt was creased. She strode over to the hall leading to the front door, but Will's voice stopped her.

"Sue, wait- before I forget…." He had followed her into the hall, but remained three meters away from her.


"Does this mean you're clearing off my choir room now?"

Striding back to Will with an eerie smile etched on her face, she mouthed, "Never."

"What?" Will roared in outrage. "That was the deal-"

"Oh, who cares what the deal was, William?" she screeched. "I've decided that making out with you is the most worthless activity in the world- something with not much worth shouldn't get in the way of me ordering workers to put a niche into your space-wasting excuse for a room, to put my Nationals 2010 trophy in."

Will opened his mouth to argue but Sue held up her hand in front of his face. "Listen, William. It will always come down to us- me and you- winner and loser, respectively. Victories belong to winners, like me, and losses- failures, nonsuccesses, whichever synonymous word you think suits you- will always, truly belong to you.

"You might have won the first half of the battle," continued Sue. "But it's the end of the battle that matters- keep that in mind. And just when you thought you've won, think again: losers don't win- it's not their job to. What the heck are they called losers for if they win?"


"You don't need to send me out, William; I'd be glad to leave to leave this sickly, moldy place you call home." Sue chuckled darkly, turning the doorknob and pushing the door open. "It just keeps coming back to you, Will. You're a loser, and right after Regionals when your underdogs lose, rest assured you'll be a certified loser for life."

She turned on her heel, strutting away, leaving Will Schuester to glare after her with his fists balled up. But on the brighter side, thought Will. The old-evil- Sue is back. A war is definitely not worth fighting if you haven't got Sue Sylvester as your opponent, after all.



A/N: Sue wins! Yeah, well of course she's supposed to. A losing Sue doesn't sound too good for humor, does it?

Hmmm… since this will be my first Glee fic, would you guys be kind enough to leave a review? Just tell me what you think. Okay? Please and thank you's!

To those charitable enough to review my first Glee fic, you get to have a make-out session with Will Schuester- and he'll tell you you're the best.

Thanks, guys!