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This is the last part in the 1st POV. From the next update onwards the POV will change and we will get to see both Merlin and Arthur. The reason for this is that for some reason up until now the story simply demanded to be told this way and then...well...it changed.
Who am I to argue with the powers that be?
I must have somehow managed to fall asleep so when we finally stopped, I was sort of dazed and it took me a few seconds to identify that the screaming was actually Gwen.
I was lifted off the horse and I more or less fell into her arms, she had apparently taken lessons from Arthur on how to squeeze the life out of me.
Had there been a class I had missed?
"Gwen…need to breathe…"I managed to whisper and she finally let go but my relief was short lived because now Arthur was off his horse. He promptly put an arm around me; it almost appeared as if he was staking his claim, 'Merlin is mine, back off.'
Morgana was there too, looking just as relieved but she had more self restraint than Gwen, she simply grabbed both my hands, squeezed hard and welcomed me back.
I was still in a daze, everyone had been worried about me, that sort of came as a shock but then I wondered, why that was?
I had made friends here, I had known that before, of course they had been worried and of course they would be relieved that I was back home, what I couldn't figure out was why I hadn't expected that.
My mother had loved me but apart from her I couldn't honestly recall a single other person that had cared for me, Will had been my friend but in the end, we had only just started growing closer right before my mother sent me to Camelot, so this was a totally new situation for me.
I had friends.
I stumbled and apparently that was enough for Arthur to scoop me up again, carrying me up the stairs.
I clung to him, not bothering to protest any more, I had learned that it was useless.
I was just going to have a word with him later on, when I was feeling less dizzy, less in actual need of help and when he had stopped acting so out of character as well.
I figured everyone was still in shock and in one, two days tops, everyone would just get over it and go back to their usual behaviour.
"His room is that way…" Gaius appeared out of nowhere but Arthur ignored him and just kept on going.
"Arthur!" Gaius shouted after the prince who it appeared had momentarily turned deaf.
I looked around curiously, realizing Arthur was carrying me to his room, I wanted to protest but when my head hit his amazingly soft pillows, I just sighed; I might have even moaned in pleasure. Then I curled over, grabbing a pillow and holding it close.
It was Arthur's problem if he wanted to give his bed to his servant, not mine. I wasn't going to reject the soft mattress for my own bed. I so wasn't.
"Have you talked to Uther then?" Gaius must have followed Arthur and even though I was already half asleep, their voices kept me on the edge of consciousness, not quite awake but not yet asleep either.
Their voices were muted, they were obviously trying not to wake me, I could have corrected them but that would have required energy and I was too busy hugging the comfy pillow.
"No, not yet." Arthur said almost as if he was hesitating, dreading to talk to his father; I had never really known Arthur to sound like that when it came to his father.
"If you really want this, then you had better do it sooner rather than later."
"You're right, I'll do it now…but Merlin…"
"I'll watch him, you just go."
"You think he'll be alright with this?"
"After all he's been through, he lets you hold him, touch him, I think you've got nothing to worry about."
And then I did finally fall asleep.
When I awoke, I was once again in Arthur's arms, something which seemed to be a new habit that neither I, nor Arthur seemed to be able to break.
I blinked, trying to focus and I found Arthur staring back at me, so close…closer than he had ever been before, at least not while I was semi-coherent…and in his bed.
"I should leave…go back to my own room…this is your bed…"this was the most I had said ever since I had been rescued and I took it as a sign that my own faculties were returning.
"No, Merlin, your place is here. Stay." Arthur spoke with total conviction and honestly, the bed was leagues better than mine, so I just let it go; who was I to argue with a prince?
I was just his servant, if he wanted me in his bed, who I was to refuse him?
And that just sounded really wrong…why then did it hold its own appeal?
"I've got to go, but you just stay here…rest…"
I looked around, thinking that the room could do with some cleaning but apparently Arthur had either learned to read my mind or I had been really obvious because he shook my shoulders, trying to make a point, "Under no circumstances are you to clean my room. You're no longer my man servant. I've spoken to my father."
I just blinked, feeling as if I had somehow missed an important conversation but for the life of me I couldn't recall it.
"You…you're firing me?" I managed to say, while thinking 'Arthur didn't want me?'
"No, stupid, "Arthur smiled at me, "well, sort of I guess. Just rest, I'll get a different servant eventually, you won't have to worry about any of it. Like I said, I talked to my father, its official now."
I blinked, and then Arthur quickly pressed a kiss to the top of my head and got out of the bed. I stared after him, watching him dress, unable to form a coherent thought and it wasn't because I liked staring at his half naked body.
Well that might have been part of it, but it wasn't the main reason.
I really felt as if I had somehow missed an important conversation and I was once again worried that Arthur had gone insane.
I needed to talk to someone, someone who hadn't gone mental.
I slowly got out of bed, taking baby steps until I was sure that I wasn't going to collapse any time soon. I looked around for my shoes and when I couldn't find them, I just looked for anything I could put on.
I wore the same trousers Arthur had put me in the night before, the shirt was rather long and clearly not one of mine, probably Arthur's too. I did feel slightly bad for steeling more of his clothes, but it wasn't as if I had started it.
Arthur had put me in his clothes, clearly that gave me a clear pass to steal his shoes too.
His shoes however were just a little bit too tight, which obviously meant that I had bigger feet and because it was only logical conclusion, at least for how my mind worked, the next thing that came to mind was that if I had bigger feet, did that mean that I had a…hm…bigger cock?
I shook my head, maybe it wasn't just Arthur that had gone insane, maybe it was something in the air and it was clearly contagious.
I was startled when the door suddenly opened and a young girl entered. I had never seen her before but she carried a tray with steaming food on it and I was reminded just how hungry I actually was.
She put the tray down and then to my surprise she flushed red, staring at me and then she bowed.
I was left staring after her, wondering what had just happened.
However I was too hungry to stand there for much longer, so I quickly started eating.
As it turned out though I couldn't actually eat all that much, apparently eating nothing for a few days had somehow shrunk my stomach and even though I wanted to eat all of it, I just knew that if I kept going I would be sick and I really didn't want to feel ill.
I stopped, eyeing the food longingly but with a deep sigh, I got up and slowly walked out of the room.
I took careful steps, not quite trusting my body not to collapse under me but so far I seemed to have at least gotten part of my strength back. I managed to walk down the hall without falling on my ass, so that was clearly an improvement.
I passed many people I had seen before and every single one of them nodded their heads, some bowed a little which was just creepy. That kind of behaviour was usually reserved for either the king or for Arthur definitely not for me.
What was going on here?
I hadn't been serious before when I'd thought everyone had gone insane but apparently I was rapidly being proven wrong. Was I the only sane one left?
The fate of the world would be in great peril indeed if it rested on my shoulders alone…
Gwen…she would be able to give me a straight answer…
I didn't trust Gaius, not when it came to giving me a straight answer, he seemed to be conspiring with Arthur; they clearly had some sort of an understanding going on and I wasn't too sure what that meant.
I needed someone unbiased, someone outside the circle so to speak, to give me a straight answer or two.
Gwen it was then…I just needed to find her before those weird bowing people told Arthur that I had fled his room.
I hurried along as quickly as I could.
I found Gwen eventually in the hallway, carrying linen and I offered to help her if she would talk to me for a minute or two.
"You don't need to bribe me to talk to you, you know that…"She smiled at me, putting the linen down and then sitting down on one of the stairs.
I sat down next to her, knowing what I wanted to ask but suddenly unsure how to find the right words.
"So…are you alright?" she finally broke the silence and I just nodded.
"Everyone is just suddenly so weird…"
"You mean Arthur hasn't talked to you yet?" she sounded as if she just couldn't believe it and my startled expression clearly gave her the answer she had already suspected.
"What…?" I was about to ask her what Arthur should have told me but she cut me off, "Merlin, it isn't my place to tell you, just talk to Arthur."
She smiled at me and then hurried along, as if she was suddenly too scared to talk to me.
Something was up but clearly if Gwen wasn't going to tell me, stopping someone else and asking outright wasn't going to get me any answers either, so I might just as well get back to Arthur's room and wait there for him, and since I was already up, I could get some new linen too, who knew what new servant Arthur was going to end up with and until then, I should better make sure that he was still looked after.
Usually he never really appreciated what I did for him, and while I would be the first one to admit that I wasn't particularly talented at being a servant, I always did everything to the best of my abilities, it just didn't sit right with me to leave Arthur without new linen if I could help it.
I wanted to show him that I was still useful.
I had no idea why he no longer wanted me as his servant but maybe I could still change his mind.
I got more odd looks when I picked up a clean batch of linen; I had done it countless times before, often joking with people along the way. Now everyone just looked at me strangely and the bowing still hadn't stopped.
I practically fled to Arthur's room, it was just too weird but when I got there, I already found the prince pacing the room, looking livid.
When I entered, he shouted, "Where were you?"
I stopped, the door shutting loudly behind me and just stared like a deer caught during a thunder storm, wide eyed and all confused. "I…just…um…linen?"
I held out the clean linen almost as if it was a peace offering but instead of smiling appreciatively, Arthur glared, grabbed the linen and threw it away.
Then he roughly grabbed me and forced me onto a stool. When I winced, he looked mortified and pushed me onto the bed.
"Stop it, you're freaking me out. What's going on?" I nearly shouted; I couldn't take it any more.
"Merlin…"Arthur looked uncertain now and that was worrying me even more.
Then he got down on his knees, took both my hands into his and held on tight.
I just stared down at the prince, totally frozen, I didn't know what was happening but I got the feeling it must be of monumental proportions.
"I asked my father for you to be my consort."
"Um…I don't understand…" and I honestly didn't. What did that mean?
"You got kidnapped because of me…" Arthur started out but I had heard enough of this nonsense, I interrupted him, "Arthur, I got kidnapped because those people were loons…"
"No, Merlin, you were taken because they figured out that I loved you."
"What?" my blue eyes had gone wide again, I must have looked just as shell shocked as I felt, because, while that explained a few things to me, it didn't really explain anything at all.
"I tried to hide it, I didn't want to get you into any trouble… so I never said anything but apparently I still gave myself away, so they figured that you were the perfect way to get me to do what they wanted, to hurt me…by hurting you…and I'm so sorry, you've got no idea…Merlin…please…"
I just stared at the blond prince, my mouth wide open, I was sure I must look perfectly stupid but I just couldn't shake myself out of it.
"You…you…love me?" I repeated, I just didn't get it.
Why would he love me?
As in…what was there to love?
"Yes, I do…do you think that I wouldn't notice that it was always you who came to my rescue, who followed me and aided me, but never took any credit? I'm not as dumb as I must look…really…"
"I don't know about that…"I muttered and I got a swat as my reward.
Then it finally sunk it…what had he just said?
"So…you know…about…about…" 'my magic'? The last bit wasn't actually spoken out loud because I just couldn't bring myself to confess it to the prince of Camelot. It would surely get me executed straight away, regardless of any love confessions just moments prior.
"I know…and I'm glad that you were able to heal yourself…really glad…I can't imagine how hurt you would have been otherwise…"
"Wait…Arthur…those men…they didn't really hurt me…the blood really wasn't mine…"
"So you're saying that they didn't touch you?" Arthur looked me straight in the eyes and he of course noticed my flinch because while the blood hadn't been mind, that man had indeed touched me, rather inappropriately, he had even shoved a finger inside and with dread I realized, that this had been their plan all along.
All the pieces I had collected were finally starting to make sense. They had spoken about mind games, about hurting Arthur through me and at the time it hadn't made any sense because I hadn't known that Arthur was in love with me, but now, it made perfect sense.
Arthur loved me so of course he would be beside himself with worry if I got kidnapped.
And it would be all the worse if they threatened me bodily harm, to hurt me…rape me even and then they went and drugged me, heightened my senses so that when that guy touched me, it felt so much worse because every nerve in my body was firing, they wanted me to flinch when Arthur touched me, they wanted to make it impossible for me to enjoy his touch but they had been under the assumption that I had already lain with Arthur and I hadn't even known back then that the prince cared for me more than mere friendship.
But they hadn't actually wanted to really hurt me, not so far as to actually rape me they had set it up that I would react to being touched intimately, they had poured blood down my thighs to give the impression that I had been viciously taken and with the added drugs in my system, of course I had seemed dazed, totally out of it, clearly the victim of a heinous act.
Arthur's reluctance to let go of me, his constant worried glances and his entire behaviour made perfect sense now and I had to correct it, they had hurt me to some degree but they hadn't done anything like Arthur suspected.
"I wasn't raped…I just wasn't…"I tried to explain, I even held his gaze and while Arthur searched my eyes, I couldn't help but slightly flinch when his hand moved up my thigh. Apparently that was the wrong reaction because by flinching I must have confirmed to him that I was just in denial.
"No, Arthur, please…"I tried to tell him but he shut me up by placing a finger over my lips.
"Shush…let's just not talk about it again, alright? Leave it in the past…"
I didn't want to, I couldn't let Arthur continue living thinking that he had been responsible for what had happened, it wasn't his fault in any way. However I just nodded because now wasn't the time, I knew the signs, and Arthur had made up his mind and unfortunately my own behaviour spoke against me.
After all, I had been in discomfort on the saddle, indicating that I had been hurt, when it hadn't been the case; there really had been something wrong with the saddle and…
"I know about your magic and I don't care. I would have preferred if you had come to me and told me but I get why you didn't. I don't mind." He interrupted my train of thought and even though I heard the words, I couldn't help the response.
I got scared, I had lived with the fear for so long, trying to hide, knowing that if I were discovered I would be executed so even though I heard Arthur's words, I couldn't help the wave of panic that rushed over me.
"Don't hurt me…please…I can't help it, I was born with it, I didn't mean to…"I started babbling and in some tiny corner of my mind I knew that I was overreacting, maybe it was due to the fact that I had just been kidnapped, fear was still very much a part of me and right now there was so much to process, that apparently I had reached my limit.
Arthur looked stricken, trying to calm me down but nothing was working. My eyes got even wider and suddenly breathing became an issue and then the world was slowly dissolving into black dots. I started fighting, hitting…I could hear Arthur screaming for Gaius but I just couldn't stop.
I was scared, terrified, I had never felt anything like that before, it had come out of nowhere and I didn't know how to stop it until Gaius, like some sort of angel, came out of nowhere and pressed something over my mouth and nose.
I blinked up at him accusing him of something and then darkness finally descended.
Drugging me apparently was a new pastime because it had happened again but this time I hadn't minded as much because when I stared to slowly come to again, I felt relaxed, probably because Gaius had managed to give me something to calm me down too.
"Hm…"I mumbled sleepily and when gentle fingers stroked my hair I almost purred and just settled back into the pillow.
"So I guess the talk didn't go so well." Gaius spoke quietly but I could still hear him.
"It went fine up until the point where I told him that I knew about his…talents…" Arthur had hesitated just for a few moments, obviously uncomfortable in using the word 'magic' inside Camelot, the walls sometimes had ears after all.
Even though after my little freak out, if the walls had ears, it was probably already too late. That had obviously been the wrong thing to think because I could feel my chest suddenly constricting again and I was once again trying to catch my breath.
"Calm down Merlin, nothing is going to happen to you. I love you; just get that through your head." Arthur actually screamed, he then proceeded to shake me and I just stared up at him, still wide eyed but no longer freaking out.
"Maybe that isn't the way to go about it…"Gaius tried to point out but Arthur just held his chin high, looking like any arrogant prince should, "Why don't you let me settle this between me and my consort?"
"As you wish Sire…"Gaius bowed and left the room and I still stared at Arthur.
With all the magic business and Arthur claiming that he loved me I had totally forgotten what he told me: that he had asked permission for me to be his consort.
"What does that mean?" I asked breathlessly because while breathing was easier now, apparently I still hadn't quite calmed down enough to speak with a full voice.
"It means I told my father that I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. So we will get married and since you can't be a Princess of Camelot and there is already a Prince, you will be Prince consort. You will be my partner."
"Uhu…" was all I had to say to that. Now it made perfect sense why Arthur had fired me, obviously I could no longer be his servant if I was to become his consort and it also made sense that now everyone was sort of bowing to me as well but did I actually want this?
Before I had been kidnapped, life had been somewhat simple, at least compared to this and while I had to admit that thoughts of Arthur naked had crossed my mind, I wasn't actually sure if I loved the prince, not like he obviously loved me.
"Uhu…"I said again because I had nothing else to say.
It then occurred to me that if something were to happen to Arthur, I would be devastated, I would do everything in my power to bring him back, much like he had done, and I cared deeply for him, not just because he was the prince or my destiny but also because underneath his prattish behaviour he had a good heart and because…I…just…really…really…liked…him…
"I…love you too…"I said slowly, eyes lighting up because I just realized that it was actually true, I did love the idiot, my smile spread over my face and I was rewarded with another blinding smile from my blond prince in return.
"You're mine now, don't forget that…"
I just huffed and pulled Arthur down for a hug which quickly turned into a passionate kiss.
"Are you sure?" Arthur asked tenderly and I just rolled my eyes, trying to grab Arthur and to drag him back down but the prince was clearly stronger than me because he pulled away. "Are you sure?" he repeated and I just nodded, "I want my first time to be with you…now…at this moment…"
"Yes, this will be the first time you will remember…"
I was about to protest again because I really didn't think one finger in my ass counted but clearly Arthur had other plans because he started kissing me again, this time not content to just devour my lips, he quickly moved on to nibble at my jaw while his nimble fingers quickly pulled at my clothes.
When I was naked he quickly undressed too and then, with almost frightening speed, he was back on the bed, pressing me into the mattress. It was strange and also exhilarating when he pressed down into my body and our cocks met for the first time.
I had never really seen another man's cock before, at least not under these conditions and I was rewarded with a fluttering of eye lashes and a low guttural moan when my hand closed around Arthur's cock, slowly stroking up and down.
I marvelled at the feeling, the texture, so like mine yet so different. I had no idea what I was doing but I figured I wasn't doing anything wrong, at least judging by the blissed out look on Arthur's face.
Somehow Arthur still managed to spread my legs and in the end he stopped me, "I don't want to come now…" and then he moved down, smiling up at me before he took me into his mouth.
I nearly screamed, arching off the bed, the heat and the wetness around my cock was totally new, no hand job of mine could come close.
My hands fisted in the bed sheet, I might have even torn something apart but right now, all that mattered was Arthur's sinful mouth on my cock, nothing else even registered.
I did tense a little when I felt a familiar finger enter me, but unlike before, there was only a slight burn and some stretching, clearly Arthur was using something to ease his way into my body.
"You alright?" he was concerned again and I just nodded, closing my eyes.
His mouth was then back on my cock, distracting me while he was spreading me open and I had to marvel at his technique, he kept me close to the edge but somehow he always knew when I was close to coming and then he slowed down and brought me back down from the brink.
I let him shift me around, let him position himself comfortably between my legs, I even pulled them up a bit, exposing myself to him and then he was lining up, I could feel something huge and spongy pressing into me and then…then…he was all the way in and it was unlike anything I could have imagined…I was lost for words, so I just settled for very early forms of communication, I grunted, keened and purred.
I might have even screamed at some point too, he was thrusting, not too harsh but not too soft either, his hands on my hips and I soon met his every thrust with a move of my own, any thoughts rapidly vanishing from my mind and with one final scream I came, and from the wetness that soon filled me, I guessed Arthur must have come too.
When he pulled out there was an obscene pop and then some come was trickling down my thighs, this was less pleasant and even though it threatened to kill the afterglow, Arthur produced a wash cloth and when we both were clean, he actually pulled me close, snuggling and I was happy to oblige.
I still had my reservations about being prince consort, it had all happened so quickly, I had gone from being a no one to being someone and it was frightening.
My life had been turned up side down and I hadn't even noticed.
But I couldn't deny the glow inside me, I did love Arthur, I just had to trust that everything else would fall into place too.
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