A/N: This is a prizefic for Dragon Fangs and Griffin Claws. The prompt was fun...though I think I kinda fucked it up LOL I hope you like it C:
Funfax: I live only a few hours away from New Prussia. /stalkerinfo
According to Google maps it's a road... or an intersection? I read some comments somewhere, and it was said that it was a very tiny town, so that's what it's going to be for this fic XD
Warnings: Language, Prussia, very mild sexual undertones, more Prussia, potential OOCness, and author's lack of brain.
"Mattie, pleeeaaaase~" Gilbert whined.
"Gilbert, can't you hold it in for half an hour more?"
Matthew had to drive up southern Ontario for a meeting. Unfortunately, the address his boss had given him wasn't co-operating with his GPS. They had over shot Waterloo, where Matthew thought the meeting was originally supposed to be, and now they may or may not have been slightly lost.
"Are you fucking insane? I've been holding it in for two fucking hours!"
Gilbert had more or less invited himself along. He said that Germany had a lot of paperwork for him to do, so he was definitely not going home for the next week or so. Matthew didn't mind, because a week long romp with his lover helped relieve the stress that had been building up lately because of work.
"We went to a rest stop fifteen minutes ago!"
However, somewhere along in this drive, Gilbert's annoyance level was rising as fast as Matthew's tolerance level was dropping.
"So? I was too busy being awesome to go. Plus, how can you give me road head if I need to take a big leak?"
Matthew gave him a look of disbelief.
"Gilbert, I'm driving. Don't you think it'd be just a tiny bit dangerous if I gave you road head?"
"Well, whatever, I'll do it instead."
"W-what? No! N-not now!" Matthew sputtered, trying to keep his face from flushing.
"No shit, I'm not giving you head while I could piss enough to fill the English Channel."
Matthew winced at the lewd implications that comment could hold. He decided to give in, knowing that Gilbert would not shut up about it.
"Fine. I'll pull over at the next gas station I see."
Gilbert let out a happy whoop, and Matthew grinned slightly. Alright, even he vehemently denied it, maybe he did take a bit after Francis, and maybe Gilbert's offer sort Of changed his mind.
They pulled over at the back of a Small, slightly grimy gas station set off the road beside a forest. Gilbert literally jumped out of the car while it was still moving, and Matthew followed behind with an exasperated expression.
Matthew was at the counter, asking the clerk for directions when Gilbert suddenly materialized by his side.
"That was the most awesome piss ever."
"I'm sure it was." Matthew said, rolling his eyes, and then turned his attention back to the clerk.
"So ya take a left here..." the clerk drew a line down a road on the paper map with a pencil."And then ya go down past this place 'ere, until ya hit New Prussia, then you-"
He was cut off by a sharp gasp.
"Gilbert?" Matthew asked, raising his eyebrows.
"It's okay, go on." Gilbert replied, a wide grin forming his face. Matthew could tell by the look on his face that he was just barely containing his excitement.
Disturbed by the albino's creepily large smile, the clerk quickly finished giving the directions.
If there was one thing people underestimated Gilbert for, was his ability to keep his composure. He could indeed be very calm and collected if he wanted to, and that's exactly what he was. Right up until the two reached their car.
Then, he snatched the keys out of Matthew's hand, opened the door to the back seat of the car, and shoved the stunned blonde in. He climbed in, crawling over Matthew and pressing the blondes chest till he was flat on his back in the passenger seat.
"M-maple! Gil! What the- we're in a parking lot!"
And in what Gilbert would later claim was an awesome yell, and not a squeal, he exclaimed.
"Oh my god Mattie! I didn't know we had a baby!"
Matthew blinked at the figure hovering over him.
"New Prussia!" Gilbert said, poking Matthews's cheek. "That clerk said there was a new Prussia!"
Realization dawned on Matthew.
"That's not our baby, Gil...how the hell would we have a baby anyways, eh?"
"Kesesesese, I'm just so awesome I can impregnate anyone!" Gilbert replied and Matthew rolled his eyes, but good-naturedly.
"New Prussia is just a small town, Gilbert...an awesome small town, I'm sure, though." he added, offering a small smile.
"Of course it is, it's New Prussia. Even if it's small, it still kicks ass. So how come you didn't tell me before?"
"Er... Well I only found out a few minutes ago...?"
Gilbert hummed for a moment, then smirked again, leaning down and touching his forehead to Matthews.
"So, does that mean I can move in?"
"W-what?" Matthew sputtered. The question seemed very out-of-the-blue.
"Well if New Prussia isn't our baby, then it's obviously a secret way of you showing your undying love towards the awesome me. And since that's awesome, I think it would be only fair if I, being awesome, moved in and let you bask in the awesomeness that is me 24/7. "
"..I think you over did it with the awesome, eh?"
"Nope. Can't over-do this awesome." He punctuated his sentence with a small kiss. "So what do you say?"
Matthew considered it for a moment. It really wouldn't make a difference, since Gilbert was at his house most of the time anyways. All he really had to do was move whatever he hadn't already forgotten at Matthews. The answer came easier than he thought it would.
"Victory!" Gilbert did a little fist pump. "You're definitely getting road head now!"
"Actually, we'll just do it in the parking lot instead, much more comfortable. "