Title: Lost In Bella
Author: Arc Morpheus
Beta: The Beautiful & Talented Lady that is TexasBelleDivine...
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters. No copyright infringement is intended.
Rating: M – For sexy moments
Summary: The moment Bella looked at Edward she knows that she has never felt like this before, Except she can't shake the feeling that she has...with him...a boy she doesn't even remember ever setting eyes on before...Will her attempt to find out destroy them?
A/N- I would like to take a moment and say a personal thank you to a very special lady, and that is TexasBelleDivine. When I started this story I never knew where it would end, but it has led me to a wonderful world of people who I have the honour to now call my friends.
I'm very, very excited about this story, so let me know what you think.
LOST IN EDWARD…..
Around midnight, her eyes at last took shape. The look in them was warmly feline, half determined and half tentative...but all trouble.
Yes, they were just right, those chocolate brown eyes. Rising up to her fine, elegant brows, just inches from her long brown cascading hair. He picked up his charcoals and started to define the lips, using his thumb to smudge across the lips to make the pout perfect.
Edward held the paper at arm's length to assess the progress. It was hard working without Bella here, but this was all he had left to remind him of his love, the love he had walked away from, no, the love he had left behind him.
Since he arrived in Rio, he had been careful not to dwell too long on the memories that were haunting his soul. Ha Ha 'soul' he thought!
Everyday his thoughts of Bella were more difficult to push from his perfect recall of a memory, but he must try.
Edward did not care where he would end this so called living, if you could call his miserable existence a living. As long as it was not there in Forks where he had left his heart in pieces with the only person who would ever really know, accept and love him for being what he was.
He leaned back to look at his drawings scattered all over the floor and desk of his room. This lifeless paper, cruel impostor, was the only way he had of carrying her with him.
It was times like this that he envied humans who could sleep to escape the constant torment of the pictures in their minds.
But he knew that even if he could sleep, there would not be any peace for him.
The past six months had been his own personal hell, a hell of his creation. If he could only believe that Bella was better without him, that she had moved on, then at least it would have been worth the agony.
Edward knew that day by day, minute by minute, that he was crumbling. At first his mind replayed all the images of that dark day when he told Bella 'I don't want you to come.' He thought that she would fight back but as she looked into his golden eyes all she saw was nothing but hard, cold determination. In his mind Edward had already departed… detached his heart and left her.
LOST IN BELLA….
Bella sat looking out of the window as Charlie stared at his daughter and wondered how he could reach inside her mind and make everything okay again. But he knew that like him, she would never function properly again. She was damaged goods…
Even after she seemed to accept the fact that they were all gone and never returning, she was still not getting better. It was like she was mourning their loss on a level he could not even comprehend. Something had to change…Bella had to change or so help him Charlie was going to go mad with grief himself.
Six months earlier…..
Bella knew from the moment her eyes made contact with Edward's that something bad was going to happen. Call it a sixth sense (Alice would have loved that she had that thought).
She approached Edward slowly but cautiously as she had a feeling of 'de ja vue' about the way he looked. Edward looked up and asked her to come for a walk with him. Bella felt this was a strange request but shrugged and said 'Sure.'
They walked for a while in silence before Edward turned and blurted out that he was leaving that day and that Bella was not wanted anymore in his life, that she would be better off without him. Bella tried to reason with Edward but nothing was going to change his mind.
She was shocked at his attitude and callous words but when he said 'I don't want you to come,' all Bella heard in her mind was 'He doesn't want me' and she felt her heart tear in two. She sucked in her breath, wishing silently for him to take back his words.
Edward walked her back to the front of the house and then turned and walked away into the darkness, disappearing like a ghostly shadow…that's when Bella remembered this was from a dream. No, not a dream, but from her nightmares where she chased Edward but could not catch him.
And that's where Charlie found her…in a crumpled heap beside her truck. At first he thought she had been attacked. Slowly he coaxed from her that Edward was gone along with all of the Cullen family and behind them they had left a totally destroyed Bella.
That's what the past six months had been like.
Bella was a lifeless soul wandering around in a world that barely touched her. She rarely slept and when she did, it was in between the nightmares and tears. Her daily life was nonexistent. Even Mike, Jessica and Angela eventually gave up trying to be her friend, seeing it as a lost cause or a mental problem they could never solve.
But that was all about to change…