Thee, buried in the past
The feel of her small, soft, dainty hand in his sent a rush of warmth down his spine. Her nearness brought a tiny, warm smile to his lips, one that he could not wipe off no matter how much he tried.
He purposefully slowed his gait so that she could keep up with him. There was no need to rush her now, she was safe anyways and they were going back to one of the safest places he could think for her.
Besides being by his side.
Kaname closed his eyes in relief, tilting his head to the sky so that he could catch the silver rays of the moon. His whole body felt light.
Yuuki gasped beside him, looking wide-eyed up at him. He looked so beautiful, lined with moonlight. She could barely get a dash of air to her lungs. The pale light reflecting off his equally pale skin gave him an ethereal look, the look of a god. His glowing face in complete contrast to his silky dark hair, lolling gently in the breeze.
He turned and looked at her, sending her heart on a rhythm faster than the beat of a hummingbird's wings. All the air she painstakingly did manage to get into her chest came out in a sudden whoosh.
He looked at Yuuki, curious to see what took her breath away. When his eyes landed on her, he felt something blossom in his chest and tighten its claws on his heart.
She was gazing at him with such undisguised awe and devotion that merely looking her in the eyes sent a jolt racing through his body and mind. The love shining in her wine depths made him want to drown in them. For eternity.
His hand tightened convulsively around hers. She gripped him tighter as well.
His eyes flew down to them for a split second, before returning to her face. If possible, her eyes had softened more than a moment ago. He took a deep breath as his heart lightly picked up its pace.
She smiled at him, somehow understanding everything he was thinking, feeling at that moment. He gave in to the impulse that came the second he saw the heart-stopping sight and pulled her to himself. Her slight frame melted beautifully against him and he very much wanted to never let her go. His arms wound around her and crushed her to himself.
''Yuuki, I fear that I have become too attached to you. Now, and even before, I will never be able to let go of you. You mean too much to me.''
She burrowed deeper into his chest, rubbing her cheek gently against him. He took another shuddering breath.
''Kaname.'' She almost moaned against him. ''You mean so, so much to me too. It's like you've wrapped yourself around my heart and leaving you would rip it right out of my chest.''
Though, I would be able to survive without it. I would have to, because you're waiting for me still. The attachment I have to you now is great and strong, but the one I have to the you that is mine is much, much stronger. In promise, I'll find a way to make it as painless to you as possible.
Her fingers dug into his sides and her hold on him tightened to almost painful and crushing. he closed his eyes and buried his nose into her hair inhaling deeply, basking in her scent.
His throat tightened and burned in hunger, his eyes were red, so red that he could see the terrifying glow even while they are closed. He did not want Yuuki to see him like this.
He ground his teeth together, refusing to acknowledge his thirst for her blood in fear of actual sinking his fangs into her soft neck and taking the delicious liquid, refusing to drink from her lest he scare her away.
Every last tendril, every last burn, every last yearning, he fought them all away, for her sake.
Kaname reluctantly unwound his arms from around her and pulled her lightly away from his chest. But, just enough to clearly see her face and have her looking at him.
''Let's go back, you are tired and haven't slept that much.'' He took her hand in his again and began to walk away. She followed him silently. ''It would be smart to go to bed and rest a little, or, at least, take it easy.'' He glanced at her pointedly then.
She blushed and averted her eyes from him. ''I told you I felt something and I'm pretty curious by nature, not to mention somewhat hyperactive. You can't honestly expect anything but disaster to come from that combination.''
''Really? Then I should have someone babysit you at all times.'' He smirked at her.
She huffed and glared half-heartedly at him. He only smirked wider. Yuuki pouted and turned away from him. Kaname laughed and tugged her closer.
''What do you think?''
She whirled around instantly, fire ablaze in her gaze, a finger pointed directly at his face. ''I wouldn't be the first time you did something like that! Honestly, it's as if I can't take care of myself. I'm not a kid that needs looking after.'' That finger descended on his chest and poked, hard. ''Ya hear?''
He chuckled, took ahold of her hand and the offending finger and brought it to his lips. Kaname then proceeded to nibble lightly at it with his fangs. ''As you wish.''
She blushed and snatched her finger from his grasp.
Endearing. Kaname's eyes softened at her form walking just slightly in front of him. But, what did she mean by saying this wouldn't be the first time he did that. He never had someone follow her, they don't know each other for long enough for him to have done something like that in the past, and he didn't have a need to do it in the last few days, especially since he could always feel her.
For a second his gaze was speculative and slightly suspicious on her, but it faded quickly, leaving behind only affection and endless trust.
She must have said it wrong.
They were just passing through the front door when Kaname remembered how Yuuki fought against all those vampires. Truthfully, she never gave him the impression of someone who knew how to fight. There was a precision and ease in her movements that gave away her familiarity with fighting, no untrained person would have such precision and swiftness in their movements.
His eyes cut to her and noted the ease and confidence of her gait, and the sureness of every motion she makes. It is only now that he truly began to realise how much he underestimated her, how much everyone else underestimated her. Her seemingly carefree attitude and sunny disposition painted a picture of blissful innocence and ignorance, of someone who is weak and sheltered, naive.
It took one look at her against that army to know how wrong he'd been. She is innocent, but not naive or blind. Yuuki knows the world around her, and its harshness. She can, and has, easily dealt with it before.
He couldn't help but wonder then, if maybe that wasn't the only thing he'd been wrong about with her.
She turned to him then, smiled and asked ''Something on your mind?''
He blinked and hesitated for a second. ''I saw you fighting those creatures and was wondering just how you learnt to fight like that.''
Her mouth formed a small 'oh' and her eyes hardened minutely, but not at him. ''I had to learn, I wouldn't have lasted long there if I hadn't.'' Especially since I had appetizing blood as a human, and an academy full of vampires to top it all. ''The world is not a safe place, and I won't pretend otherwise.''
Kaname sighed. She answers questions, but doesn't give any information besides that. It made him wonder if she didn't have something to hide. Yuuki is friendly and outgoing, but he still didn't know almost anything about her.
''Don't you have someone to protect you?''
She turned back to him then and her eyes seemed deeper and warmer than ever before. ''Of course I do, but I should know how to protect myself, so that I can eventually protect others. The ones closest to me.'' She turned forward again. ''The one most important person.''
He swallowed hard, having the overwhelming urge to clench his hand over his heart to make the sensations stop.
''You should go to your room now, to have some rest would do you good.''
She turned and eyed him sceptically. ''And what about you?''
He smiled slightly at her as his hand came up and took a lock of her hair. ''I'll go rest as well.''
Her eyes narrowed a slightest notch at him, but he continued to enjoy the silkiness of her tresses. There was something off with him, and damn if she wouldn't find out sooner or later.
''Okay.'' She voiced reluctantly and gave him a small, hesitant smile. ''Rest well.'' Then she stepped back and turned, walking away.
He watched her go, and then turned around himself.
Kaname sighed and absentmindedly followed the patterns on the wall as he walked by. Up, down, zig-zag, up, down, zig-zag, drop, up... how incredibly mundane.
He inhaled deeply and sighed, almost hoping to rid himself of all the heaviness he suddenly felt. He didn't want to send her off like that, he yearned to be with her, to have her close, to touch her, to embrace her, to kiss her. He yearned for it so much that Kaname feared he would never be able to separate himself from her, not even for an instant. Not that that thought brought any anxiety and ill feelings to him, he was almost... happy by it.
Still, he didn't mean to hurt her or shun her by sending her to her room. He could easily see the small veil of hurt that came to her eyes when he told her to go, along with something else churning deep inside her orbs. Suspicion? Maybe.
But he was... hurt, when she said that there is someone out there to protect her, and said it with so much warmth and affection that he felt his heart clench. He wanted her to be like that when referring to him, when thinking of him.
He almost panicked when he heard her, almost gave up. But in a split-second he remembered the way she looked at him, the way she spoke to him, the light in her eyes when she took from him. That saved him. Because, he too has a place in her generous heart.
So he sent her to rest, so that he could settle himself.
But Kaname realized that he really knew nothing of her. Not that it mattered, his view of Yuuki would barely change, whatever he happened to find out about her. Though, he had a great desire to find and know everything about her, to understand her completely and fully. He wanted to know how she thinks, the way she understands, how she feels, the way she sees people around her, everything. He wanted to know everything about her.
For that's what she deserves, nothing less that someone who would know her every whim, her every craving, her every whish, and give it to her on a silver platter. She has to have someone who would know her, really know and understand her, he would permit nothing less than that.
If he managed to be that someone for her, if he managed to truly make her happy, then maybe, just maybe, someday he would be worthy enough to taste her blood, to be her equal.
He yearned to be worthy enough to be her equal.
Just as much as he craved her blood.
A vicious burning started in his throat and spread through his veins through his entire body.
He stopped walking and leaned against the wall, needing the support. This hunger was the strongest one to date. It felt as if every cell in his body suddenly awakened and lit on fire worse than the lava from the hottest volcano. His throat was the worst of all and he had to actually cup it with both hands in vain hope of lessening the pain.
Every part of himself screamed for her, his very essence needed her. He had to clench his muscles to stop from pushing off the wall and going after her. Even now, even here, he could still distinctly smell her fragrant scent and follow it directly to her.
He exhaled loudly and clenched his teeth together, pulling every ounce of control he possessed and willing himself to turn around and head in the direction of his room. It took him a few moments before he finally moved.
With every step he took in the opposite direction from her, his hunger got worse and worse. It scorched and engulfed, ripping the shroud of humanity he had painstakingly built around himself piece by piece. With every piece that chipped away and fell, the same monster within him got stronger and bolder. It seduced his weary mind and promised delight he had never seen.
And Kaname was so close to succumbing, so very close to turning around and breaking every promise he had silently made to himself since Yuuki arrived. Every restraint he had managed to build up was in danger of shattering.
His hunger weakened him, pushed him, tried to lead him astray. But, in the last second, the very last instant, as he was about to fall into the unforgiving abyss of inhumanity and truly become a beast, the image of her clear eyes appeared before his mind's eye. In the end she was the one to give him the strength to fight the monster within himself, the monster that undoubtedly is he himself.
He stopped in front of his door, resting his forehead against the smooth, polished wood. His bright, glowing red eyes were closed and his breathing ragged, his throat was tighter and more painful than ever. But he succeeded. He did not go and bother Yuuki with something as mundane as his hunger. She doesn't need to be bothered with his afflictions.
Kaname barely even registered gripping the doorknob and opening the door, a small part of his mind noticed that he'd swung it hard enough to slam loudly into the wall and to violently reflect it close. He almost stumbled into the room, his steps were heavy and slow, lethargic. He barely made it to the bed and sat uneasily on the covers.
His breath came in harsher, more laboured gusts and his whole frame was rigid and tense. He buried his head in his hands and fisted his fingers in his hair.
Will this hunger never pass? The inferno in his orifice raged on and still steadily grew in intensity, even now. His insides burned, turned molten from need. In front of his closed eyes the image of Yuuki danced. Her beautiful eyes were suddenly replaced with her soft, creamy neck. He could clearly see the myriad of tiny blood vessels running through her throat, as well as the steady rhythm of her pulse as blood flowed through her jugular.
He could imagine himself nearing her beautiful throat and slowly running his tongue up and down her skin, looking for the perfect spot to break the thin membrane dividing him from her warm blood. He would pull her silky hair aside and tilt her head to have better access and to make it less painful for her. Her small frame would be pressed against him and he'd have the delight of feeling her so close again. Her breaths would run along his cheek and flow by his ear, rustling his hair.
His hunger flamed more as it all played in his mind and he made a noise at the back of his throat. What was he thinking? That was unreachable for him. He tightened the fingers in his hair, threatening to pull it out.
''Why are you torturing yourself?''
His whole body tensed and Kaname straightened himself. He looked up and locked eyes with Yuuki.
She was leaning against the desk, her posture relaxed and calm. Her arms were crossed in front of her chest and she was favouring her left leg a little. Her hair spilled over her shoulders wildly and ended just by her waist. Her breathing was slow and quiet compared to his, even her voice vas even and low. But her eyes were a raging storm. He could not even begin to recognize the mass of emotions swirling in her wine depths. Her gaze was intense on him, as well as... disappointed.
His shoulders tensed even more as his breaths grew hard and ragged. The hunger, that monster inside him, was delighted to have her so close. Her scent was fresh and strong instead of stale and weak, and it sent his senses ablaze. It ignited the burn of his hunger to further heights. His eyes glazed over as he looked at her.
Her voice snapped him out of his trance and he managed to pull a little composure out of nothing. ''What?''
He could see her grinding her teeth together, that was not good for her fangs. Her fingers dug into the fabric of her sleeves. ''Why are you torturing yourself?''
''I am not.'' He looked at the door, breaking eye-contact.
''Don't lie to me.'' She ground out softly. ''I know you. I also know the signs of extreme hunger when I see them.''
''It's not that relevant.''
''Of course it is!'' her hand flew from her chest and slammed down on the edge of the desk. ''You are being hypocritical. Weren't you the one to tell me that hunger is normal, that I should come to you when I need. Did you forget what happened only a few hours ago?''
His eyes lifted to hers with such speed. ''No.''
''Then, why are you denying yourself what you selflessly gave to me?''
''I am not. It's not that serious. You should rest.''
''Not that serious!'' she almost snarled. Her fingers dug deep into the wood, creating profound, unnatural groves on the surface. She was keeping her anger amiably under control, none of her considerable power surfacing to show. If he were not as strong as he was, he wouldn't have noticed the smallest of shifts in her aura. ''You were in pain! I saw you stagger into the room, barely able to move straight and stand upright. And before that, I felt your turmoil and anguish, you were nearing your breaking point. I saw what the results of fully caving into hunger were, madness. Our uncle went insane for even the smallest sliver of the blood he craved. I will not see something like that happening to you! You are stronger than that.''
She panted from her outburst, and he could not think of anything else but how beautiful she looked while angry. He needed to compose himself quickly.
''I will not burden you with weight that are not yours to carry.''
She lost it. Throwing her hand in the air she started walking towards him, her steps quick, but even and measured. ''This is not about burdens and weight, not is it about duty and roles. It's about your happiness, and mine. Can't you see that I would give you anything you asked for, can't you see that I want you to take my blood to relieve your suffering. I want you to be the one I give my essence to, I want you to take it with your own fangs and let yourself go.''
He was staring at her mesmerised. She stopped in front of him and pulled his head into her hands. Leaning down to his eyelevel, she looked deep into his eyes and spoke so that he would hear the truth of her words.
''To put restraints on everything about yourself is not healthy. I want you to be how you are with me, just as you want me to be who I am with you. It's a two-way connection, you can't expect me to give my all if you do not do the same.'' Her eyes softened and the hands holding his head grew tender and affectionate. ''Let go and fall, I will be there to catch you. Drink my blood, it is your right to do so if you want it.''
The expression on his face didn't change, but he was shell shocked. He sat there, staring at her, immersed in silence. Slowly, her words seeped into his mind, and his heart. Slowly, he felt every useless restraint snap like a dry twig under her foot. And they were useless, she told him so, and her word was law. It didn't matter that he finally understood what she told him, he would have accepted it even if her did not.
Slowly he relaxed. His eyelids dropped to half mast and his breathing evened out. He greedily took in her heavenly scent as his eyes feasted on the sight of her throat. He could smell her divine blood even under her skin, it ignited his hunger even more. He felt as if his own throat might melt closed. But, he didn't fight it this time. No, now he knew he would find solace.
His arms came around her waist and pulled her closer to him. She gave him a small smile of approval and her eyes touched to very core of his soul. He felt a small shiver race up his spine.
''How did you come in? I haven't heard you enter, or felt you close.'' He asked as he nuzzled the side of her neck. He inhaled deeply and was rewarded with what could be only be described as heaven. His eyes bled red and his hold on her tightened. She melted into him.
He could feel her muscles work into a smile by his ear. ''I came in before you. And you were too distracted by your hunger to notice my presence coming in your room.''
He hummed and pulled her into his lap, his tongue leaving his lips to deliver one languid lick. ''How didn't I notice you in here when I entered?''
She giggled and he found himself relishing the sound. It was like the ringing of a multitude of high pitched bells.
''I think it was for the same reason. Your head was in the gutter.''
He suddenly moved and altered their positions, throwing her on the bed beside him. Kaname positioned himself above her, resting on his elbows, his head buried in her neck. He licked her smooth ivory skin over and over, feeling her breath hitch with every stroke. Her arms wound themselves around his neck and pulled him tighter against her. He almost groaned, what he had wished for was so close, what he had thought out of his reach now within his grasp.
''Why did you come?''
''I knew you needed blood, and I was not about to let you go on denying yourself what you rightfully deserve.''
He felt his heart speed up at hearing her words, his tongue grazed one of his fangs. So close.
''How did you know?''
''I saw it in your eyes as we walked and as you sent me away. Did you really think that I would deny you? How stupid.'' Her hands fisted in his shirt and hair.
He pulled up just enough to lock his eyes with hers. Her pale skin was almost glowing in the dark and her eyes were trained solely on him. He could hear her heart beating a quick, frantic rhythm. He was sure his own might join it soon. He could hear the rapid rush of her blood in her veins, and it was pulling him in. His glowing, bloody eyes focused on hers for a split second longer and then he lowered his head.
His lips closed over her pulse point in a tender kiss before his fangs sank in her throat.
Her warm, delicious blood flowed down his throat, effectively putting out the burning flames. He relished it, drowned in it. Let it paint in his mind and heart the portrait of her emotions and feelings. Let it plunge him into her memories.
They were vague, almost as if shrouded in a veil. He kept seeing a silver-haired boy and a blond man with glasses. The latter always in cheery smiles and a carefree attitude, the former always with a serious expression on. He felt her love for them, her worry, her trust. He saw a majestic building, somehow familiar to him, a hall, a gate. Ha also saw a dark-haired person in a white coat and piercing eyes, though he did not know how he knew such since he couldn't see his features. He knew not the lines of his face nor the colour of his eyes, but he knew that this person was someone precious to Yuuki. Her remembered emotions told him such.
Though, he didn't linger on those memories that much. The last couple of days here was what he kept on seeing the most, and it astounded him that she cared for him deeply even the first time she saw him standing with Artemis in the ruins. For he could freely feel her every emotion. Even what she was feeling this very instant.
Yuuki closed her eyes as she gave herself away to the feeling of her blood being drawn out of her. She poured everything she felt for him in her blood, and let it flow into Kaname. Her only hope was that he doesn't see the future. Though, would it be that bad if he does?
It seemed an eternity later when he pulled away from her and looked down into her eyes. His eyes shone down with such happiness that her breath stilled in her throat. She raised her hand and caressed his cheek. His eyes closed as he savoured her touch.
When they opened again he bent down and sealed her lips with hers.
Their kisses were small and sweet in the beginning, but steadily grew longer and more sensual. He showed her everything he felt as he worshipped her lips. She gave everything back as her mouth moulded to his. Her hand had long left his cheek and tangled itself in his hair, keeping him pinned to her. The other one sneaked itself behind his back and fisted a handful of his shirt.
Kaname's own arms were around her as well. One had positioned itself under her head, the other wedged between her back and the bed, both holding himself as close to her as possible.
Her tongue streaked over his lips and he almost moaned. He opened his lips and lost himself to her. She broke off from him a while latter and continued to slowly plant small pecks along his jaw line. His eyes closed in bliss.
''I love you, Yuuki.''
Well, people, here's the chapter I promised. And it actually came in the summer, like I promised, yaay for me. XD
Did you like it? I know I looooved writing it, especially the last part. Oh, and Yuuki is slipping a little, the little about him doing it before and the our uncle part.
Thank you all for reading tihs and continuing to do so. And a special Thank You to all of you who support me. I love ya'll
P.S. If there are any errors you've noticed tell me where so I can correct them. This was done quick and I proof-read it quickly, so some things might have escaped me.