A/N: Okay, before you call the authorities to have me hauled away, let me explain why I'm starting a new "story." I was eating Chinese food a few weeks ago and I got the fortune this story is based on. Really, doesn't it just cry out to be a story about Spock? Which started me thinking - I could write stories based on fortune cookies! And here is the first. They are going to be like the "put your iPod on shuffle and write" prompts except without the music. The stories will be random and unrelated for the most part.

AND if you go out for Chinese food and get a fortune you find especially amusing, entertaining, crack-worthy, send it to me, please! I don't promise to use all of them but I would love to have a bunch to choose from. (I'd eat Chinese food a lot more often but my doctor would be most displeased!)

Thanks! Hope you enjoy these stories (of which there is currently only one.)

Beware the fury of a patient man.

Okay, really, Jim knew he shouldn't have done it. That part of his brain that usually is sequestered, the not-everyone-is-interested-in-banging-you part, had sent multiple, Technicolor warnings to the how-could-they-not-when-I'm-so-awesome part. The awesome part won out and that's how he ended up face down on his bed, his wrists tied to the headboard as Spock stood staring holes through him.

"Tell me again why you were openly flirting with the Ambassador from Yirkaki," Spock asked, his tone modulated, his eyes flashing in anger.

"I needed a way to pass the time," Jim said, breaking eye contact first. He was still a little surprised that Spock had resorted to tying him. He had no intention of trying to escape. Well, trying yes. Succeeding, absolutely not. "You were busy talking to the Grand Poohbah of the Hundred Acre Woods. What did you except me to do?"

"First of all, Captain, I was speaking with the Sovereign of Schindroth, as you should have been. Secondly, prior to beam down, you and I had discussed the inappropriateness of you flirting with anyone at this diplomatic function. You had, in fact, agreed not to act in a manner that could be perceived by any of the attendees as openly or subtly flirtatious." Spock was in full lecture mode and Jim knew there was no way to stop him until he had said everything he intended to say. Probably had a whole stack of mental index cards on which were listed all of the Captain's crimes and misdemeanors. Jim contented himself with watching Spock, enjoying the measured way in which he most certainly did not pace up and down beside Jim's bed. "I fail to understand the reason for your actions," Spock finally said, staring down at Jim in stoic disapproval.

Jim shrugged. "I'm not sure why you are so interested in how I acted at the reception. I didn't upset the Ambassador. She enjoyed the attention, and when I left her, she was smiling. I'm not planning to have her baby. And I sure didn't do anything to upset our fragile treaty."

"Your actions were inappropriate," Spock countered. "Your flirtations were illogical. Your presence caused a stir when it should have gone practically unnoticed."

"Spock Spock Spock," Jim said, shaking his head. "When have the two of us ever attended a diplomatic function when our presence was 'practically unnoticed'? Seriously. I did everything I could to be a wallflower. But that isn't our lot in life. Blaming me isn't logical, you know."

"You laugh too easily. You engage those in conversation with whom you should not speak. Your actions are never within the bounds of logic."

"And tying me to my bed is logical?" Jim had to ask.

"I intend to ensure that I have your undivided attention. Left to your own devices, you would be reading from a padd, sending messages to your crew, and playing a game of chess simultaneously," Spock said in accusation.

"Yeah, but I'd be playing you," Jim pointed out.

"That is not the point," Spock said. "I wish to spare you from any possible future embarrassment by reminding you, once again, of your duty to Starfleet and the Federation."

"Huh," Jim said, pretending to think it over. "Admiral Pike hasn't had any problem with my behavior. Or said anything about me not fulfilling my duty."

"That is not the point," Spock repeated.

"What is the point, Spock? Do you even know?" Jim asked, his tone light, nearly teasing. It was dangerous, he knew. But there was excitement to be had by living on the edge.

"I have explained. You are being intentional obtuse." To Spock's totally not visible surprise, Jim laughed.

"No, Spock. If anyone here is obtuse, it's you," Jim said.

"You are mistaken, Captain," Spock retorted, daring him to disagree.

"You have me tied down. Face down. You are mad because I was flirting. With someone who welcomed the attention. I'm not the math wizard you are but when I add up 2 + 2, I always get 4."

Spock shook his head, staring down at the taunting blue eyes of his Captain. "You are trying my patience," he said evenly.

"Yeah. I've been trying to try your patience. Admit it, Spock. You don't want me flirting with anyone but you."

Spock froze at those words, not even breathing. "You have had a blow to the head."

Jim laughed again. "You didn't take your eyes off of me all fucking night, Spock. You'd know if I had suffered a concussion. You are jealous because you want me for your own."

"That is illogical," Spock tried.

"So? That doesn't make it any less true. Don't think I haven't seen the way you look at me when you think I don't notice. And I'm pretty sure you know I look at you the exact same way. You just don't want to admit it. You want me, Spock. And I know it's true because I want you just as badly."

"That is not…" He had to stop. Lying was not in his nature. Not even lying to himself. Although he had gotten pretty good at it over the past few months.

"Come on, Spock. Why do you think I was openly flirting with the Ambassador when I knew you were watching me?"

Spock shook his head but not in denial. He reached up for the rope that secured Jim's right hand, Jim's voice stopping him.

"You don't need to untie me. Even if you do, I'm staying right here until you admit I'm right. Except if you free my hands, I'm very likely going to use them to take my pants off. Because frankly my cock needs to be set free."

"Perhaps that is a course of action better undertaken by your second in command," Spock said, barely above a whisper.

"God. About fucking time. Get on with it," Jim said, lifting his hips so Spock could undo his uniform trousers. "Get them off."

"I am endeavoring to do so," Spock said, taking plenty of time to lower them. Once Jim's pants were discarded, Spock ran a teasing finger beneath the top of his briefs. "Ought these come off as well?"

"Oh my God," Jim moaned, bucking into the bed in desperation. Spock's voice was more seductive than his hand that had moved from the top of his briefs to groping Jim's ass. Groping in a most pleasant, teasing, infuriating way. "Get them off."

"Not until I am satisfied that you will heed my warnings," Spock said, one finger slipping under the elastic around Jim's thigh, barely making contact with his quivering balls.

"I promise. I won't flirt with anyone but you. Ever. Get them off," Jim whimpered, raising his hips in pleading.

"Once we make love, you will be mine. No other will ever touch you. No other will ever know you."

"I don't want anyone else to know me. Just you. Get on with the knowing."

Spock leaned down and bit his very fine ass before uncovering it, ripping his briefs from his body.

"Oh God," Jim breathed, looking over his shoulder at Spock. "Undress. Please."

Spock shook his head, grasping Jim's hips and turning him so that he lay on his side. "You do not deserve to have all of me," Spock decided. He stared into Jim's blue eyes as his right hand reached for Jim's weeping erection. "I will give you what you need. When you deserve it, I will give you what you want."

"Gggnnnhhh…" was the only possible response Jim could make to those words. The heat of Spock's hand around his cock was better, hotter, fabulouser than he had allowed himself to imagine. It was all he could do not to come from the second Spock wrapped those long, hot finger around him in an almost too tight grasp. Jim's hips were moving of their own accord, fucking Spock's hand. Just the idea of it was almost enough to send him over the edge and he was torn between wanting the exquisite torment to be over and for it to last forever. Spock tightened his fingers a little more and Jim was exploding all over his bed.

"Ohhhhh…" Jim moaned as he lay as still as possible, afraid if he moved he'd fracture and fly apart.

"You are beautiful when you achieve orgasm," Spock said in approval. Jim had heard that tone before but it was usually used with words like The Klingons have self destructed, sir, and we are out of danger.

"Thanks," Jim whispered. "You hard?"

"I am. You will watch as I caress myself."

"I could help," Jim suggested.

"No. There will be time for that. You are still being punished."

Jim moaned at the word punished wondering why it needed to make him hard again. Well, no point worrying about it. If Spock teasing him was the punishment, he would gladly endure it. Because he'd finally succeeded in pushing Spock's patience past the point of no return. And he was happy to pay that price.