I Write The Songs. Promotional Story
TITLE: Mine Again
CHARACTERS: Eric and Sookie
DISCLAIMER: Characters are all owned by Charlaine Harris, and the lyrics for the title song are owned by Black Lab
PEN NAME: Dazedrose
BETA NAME: DeeDee
VIRGIN WRITER: NO
You'll be mine again…..
It's the first thought that enters my head as I come to 'life'. It's the same notion that has gone through my head every day since I awoke from the curse. My first thought was of her, as will be my last when I die for the day. Sookie.
I had never imagined that I would be spending my days dreaming and praying for the day she would be mine again. We have come a very long way in the short time we have known each other. From the moment I saw her on the arm of that douche Bill Compton, I knew there was something special about her. I could tell she was not fully human, something that was later confirmed by Andre while in New Orleans. She was special, and I knew that I wanted her to be mine. And it was never about her talent; I wanted her before that was even known to me. That did, however, make her that much more special. She was a true gift.
So why would I have not staked Long Shadow to stop the imbecile from killing her? I could have easily pulled him off and thrown him across the room, being a fair few centuries older than he. But just the thought of him getting to taste her blood before I had a chance didn't make this vampire a very compassionate person. He deserved to expire just for that fact, though it didn't help his case that he was stealing from me. I have never regretted doing that. All I regret is letting her leave with Compton.
There are no words to explain the feelings and thoughts this girl has created in me. She is a force of nature; a tidal wave of being that has swept me away from myself. I am no longer the Vampire I once was. Prior to her crashing into my world, I was content. Yes, I was bored, but I thought I was happy in my then current state. If she had not come along that first night, I believe I would have moved on, left Pam with Fangtasia and my Sheriff position, and re-discovered the world. But I knew I was waiting for something, watching for something to break me out of this state of being. And she certainly did that.
Life was never boring after staking Long Shadow. We had to deal with her being used as a message board to me by Callisto, a Maenad that had been drawn to Bon Temps by some pathetic human sex club. After Callisto's attack, I was able to taste Sookie's blood for the first time. It was pure perfection, even when tainted by the maenad's poison. I arranged for Dr. Ludwig to heal her, and was rewarded with the sight of Sookie on my office chair, dressed in only one of my dress shirts. I envied Compton at the time, as he was able to not only give comfort and reassurance to Sookie, but to partake in brushing out her hair. That one simple act made me jealous of his and Sookie's relationship, a feeling I was not comfortable with.
What that woman wouldn't do for those she feels strongly for. She would do anything for the ones she loves… her friends, me… It made her more valuable than anything in this world. It also made her incredibly stupid sometimes, putting herself in danger, for which she could have been easily killed. It was seen when I had sent her to Dallas to help Stan with his missing Vampire problem. If I had known then the extent to which she pushed herself, I would have reconsidered letting her go. I knew she would do it out of a sense of responsibility and pride, but that woman disregards her own worth too often for my liking, and unfortunately that doesn't seem to be stopping any time soon.
I was able to show her that her life meant something to me when those fuckers from the Fellowship decided to conduct a revenge attack on Stan's nest, in retaliation for Sookie basically bringing their whole way of life crashing down around them. Unable to live without their insane social structure, they decided to attack the nest, determined to bring destruction to the things they can no more explain than accept. I was able to shield her already battered body with my own, knowing that I would be able to survive nearly anything that those bastards could throw at us. I was lucky enough to only have been struck with two bullets, and then even luckier to have Sookie choosing to suck the bullets out of the wounds instead of cutting them out. The moment her lips touched my flesh, my body came alive. The suction she had created on the wound pulled at multiple points on my body. It brought my body alive, and the need to be consumed by her was phenomenal . I wanted nothing more than to let her drain me dry. The feelings she brought out of me were incredible, never feeling such strength of human emotions for over a thousand years. This was the first time she had taken my blood, and the experience left me wanting. It was the start of a bond that I only wanted to become stronger. I wanted to not only feel more of Sookie, but for Sookie to know more of me. The mutual bond would be complete after 3 exchanges, and I was more than keen for us to find ourselves in situations where this could occur.
It was after our Dallas trip that I found out I would do anything for this woman. I resurrected a long forgotten Halloween costume to accompany her to an orgy so she could use her precious gift to uncover the murderer of a friend. I tried during our time on the hood of my car to get her to yield to me, to forget Compton and come to my side. Even at that point I wanted her at my side. It was only the arrival of Compton that prevented me from achieving my goal, even though Sookie was becoming more receptive to me. The Maenad's entrance into the clearing, and the subsequent clean up of the bodies, limited more interaction between Sookie and me, but I knew we would have another chance.
Her misguided sense of loyalty also got her in trouble when Compton got himself kidnapped for his secret database. She again risked life and limb to help that bastard escape the clutches of his vampire bitch maker and Russell, the King of Mississippi. Though I do have to admit that if she hadn't been in Jackson, I wouldn't have seen her dance with the girl that we saved from the orgy. The way her body moved in synch with her friend aroused not only myself but all those around me. I could only imagine her body under mine, her back arching as I slide into her warm sex. The things I would do to her body would soon make her forget her time with Compton. As Sookie walked off the dance floor and headed back to the table where Russell and company were sitting, I needed to rearrange myself. That display left me wanting more; a private show would do. As I followed Sookie's progression towards the bar, I noticed a pair of humans that didn't look like they belonged. I made a decision to move towards Sookie, as I felt her emotions go wild. It was then I heard the word 'Stake' coming from her lips. I watched as once again she put her body on the line when the stake that was meant for Betty Joe entered her side. It torments me to this day that I was not able to save her from injury, but without this event, I would not have been able to heal her. I had never met anyone I wanted to have my blood running through their veins like I did with Sookie. It was not just a desire to turn her - that would come much later. It was the idea that it was my blood healing her of her injuries, giving life to her cells, rejuvenating them, bringing them back to life. I was able to be there for her in her time of need. I was the one able to bring her comfort and reassurance like Compton did after the maenad attack.
Sookie gave me a great gift that night when she allowed me to glamour her into sleep. Her body was wracked with pain, and I wanted to give her some relief during the healing. After all had left the room, I was able to indulge in a moment of luxury… snuggling with Sookie in peace. After a while she awoke, and I was able to reassure her of her progress and what had happened while she was out. I had been so close to having her yield to me, as she had begun to open herself to me. I was able to feel her warmth and desire for me as I kissed and moved against her. The feeling of her body responding to my ministration caused a growl deep inside my chest, making me feel alive once more. I would have been able to give her release if it wasn't for the bumbling Bubba crashing the party, so to speak. But in hindsight I knew that having Sookie when she was still healing wasn't the way our first time together should be. I knew from Pam (who reads Dear Abby incessantly) and the waitress at Fangtasia that the first time you have sex with someone of importance, is a significant event. I knew that Sookie would look on me more favourably if we would wait. After I sent Bubba to scout Russell's compound, I did something I haven't done since turning Pam: gave my blood freely to another person. This was different than the first time Sookie took my blood, as the amount of blood given at that time was minuscule compared to this feeding. As she pulled draught after draught of my blood into her, the connection we had grew. The bond grew and her pleasure became my own. As her lips moved on my wrist, my body unconsciously moved against her own. As it gave way to the pleasure, I attempted to move my hand lower to give her the release she was denied previously. With near Vampire speed she moved from me and quickly left after another vampire came into our room. As I organised what I needed to acquire a vehicle for her rescue attempt, she entered the room looking radiant from her shower. She settled into the bed and I fought against the desire to lie back down in bed with her. When I came back after securing her a car, I let slip my warring emotions, telling her that I didn't like having feelings. It was true to a certain extent. I think it was more the strength of the feelings I had toward Sookie that was a sticky point, and as I went to rest that day, I pondered what it all meant.
Compton was extremely lucky that I was able to heal her before she rescued his ass. She would not have survived being nearly drained by Bill in the trunk of the Lincoln I procured for her rescue mission. It was unfortunate for Sookie that the vindictive were-bitch Debbie Pelt decided that Sookie's 'interest' in her ex Alcide was reason enough to justify Sookie being locked into the trunk of the car. It was here that Bill attacked Sookie in his tortured haze, violating both her body and spirit in his bloodlust. I have never feared for Sookie's life as I did when I saw the hole in the trunk of the car, and then Sookie's lifeless body. And even though I could still feel her life force in the back of my mind, it was weak. I would have staked Bill then and there for what he had done, but my first priority was getting Sookie the healing needed. We were able to bring her around with that vile True Blood, and she seemed to recover quickly. My blood was still healing her, and I felt triumphant in my abilities as her protector, even though I couldn't have stopped her being injured in the first place.
I did take some perverse joy in seeing Sookie walking away from Bill after the Were-Bitch and Alcide fought in his apartment. I believe that Bill did tell her of some of the things that had happened while he was captured. Having become enthralled with his maker once again, his actions and behaviors during this time would have offended Sookie. I took note of her reactions, remembering them for the future. I am always the collector of useful information, and knowing that I was to make Sookie mine, any information on her reactions would be valuable and important.
If my heart had beat, it would have stopped in the moment she asked me to take her back to Bon Temp and her house. I felt her pain, though not as strongly as I would have if we were bonded. It had shocked me at the time to think such things, as the only people I have ties to are my children and maker. I had never wanted a pet, but still I couldn't fight the feeling that I needed to be able to feel Sookie more. I wanted to be able to ease her pain, to send her strength in the times of need. Little did I know that the pain she felt now from Bill's betrayal would be far surpassed when we discovered his deception in New Orleans. But many things had happened between these two points, making my pledge to make Sookie mine that much more important.
I had known suffering and loneliness in my thousand years, but I was able to recall all of it with clarity. That was until the New Year's Eve that the Were-witch Hallow had decided to cast a spell which would send me on the hunt for my heart's desire. I can now remember running down the road that led to Sookie's isolated house, running for no other reason but the compulsion to find something. I did not know what I was looking for. Only when Sookie came up behind me in her car did that desire to run abate. As I turned to her, I reacted with restraint, thinking that although I had no recollection of who she was, I knew deep in my chest that she was not to be feared, and that she would keep me safe. From that moment on in my mind, she was my sun, my moon, my whole world. It is funny looking back on this, because that is how I see Sookie, even without the memories of my time with her under the curse.
Spending every moment of my waking time with Sookie was a gift from all the gods of the past. If I could have remembered at the time those I had worshiped, I would have been singing praise to them for allowing me this woman. She cared for me, and even though it seemed to go against a deep-seated belief inside, she protected me from the unknowns that could take her away from me. The notion that this frail human woman was protecting me from the world was bizarre at best, but I know with my whole being that I would not have found a better protector than she. Although I didn't at the time know the correct name, I know now that she is my personal Valkyrie, an ode to my human past. She and She only would name the moment of my death, and I would gladly give up my life in defence of her.
Remembering what I do now, I can say to the depths of my soul that I have never loved another as I do Sookie. The experiences we shared together during this time will stay with me until my final death. The first time I laid eyes on her naked body made me feel more alive than ever in my long life. Even without my memories I knew that I was experiencing something close to a religious experience. Sookie wasn't the type of girl who was naked around a lot of people, and for her to open herself like she did was a true expression of her trust in me. That shower still puts a smile on my face when I think back. Every time I step into a shower, images float up of how Sookie's body looked under the hot streams of water, her body flush with heat, and her desire and head at war with what to do. Thankfully her desire won out, and I was allowed into her innermost circle, allowed to show her how much I desired the woman before me. Everything we did that night and the nights to follow were more than I could have asked for from her. It compared to nothing that I have experienced, and I can see now why it must have been nearly impossible for Sookie to look and talk to me after I returned to myself.
Every word I said was true while I was under the curse. I will bring her to my side, giving Sookie everything that is mine, having all that have sworn fealty to me pledge their loyalty and protection to her. After the witches were dead, all I craved was to go back to her house and make love to her, and make a life with her. I didn't need to have my thousand years of memories to know that I had never felt the same about another like I did about Sookie. I wanted to prove to her that the curse wasn't really a curse, but a blessing from the gods. They had given us a new start, the ability to start anew with each other, to build the life that I knew that Sookie deserved.
But the joke was on me, it seemed. The night I awoke from the curse I felt confused, something that I haven't felt since I awoke as a Vampire. How in the world did I get in this tiny crawl space, and why was the scent of Sookie everywhere I turned? I could feel her even more than I had the last time I saw her, and I wondered in bewilderment what the fuck had happened. When she walked into the room, I felt excitement and anticipation from her. When she noticed that I was myself, I became concerned with what had actually happened. She had explained to me about my situation, my missing days spent there, but with no more detail than that she had taken me into her care while Pam and the others under my protection found a way to reverse the curse. I knew from her emotions, which were coming in much more clearly, that she was extremely sad and in near physical pain. What had happened for her to feel so strongly towards me? I decided then that whatever I had done I would make right, though for the life of me I didn't know where to start.
Looking back, I don't believe I handled my interactions with Sookie appropriately. But really, what do you expect from a thousand-year-old vampire who had never felt a tenth of what he now felt for this human girl? I was in way too deep, and it seemed that it was totally out of my control. I knew from my interactions with Sookie since I met her that she was stubborn and proud, and pushing her too hard would just make her clamp down on her own feelings. And the times she spoke with me I tried to sense out her emotions. When she came to the bar with a request from her shifter boss, I once again asked her about what had happened during our time together. But just as she reacted in the past, she deflected my questions and directed the conversation back to business. I granted the shifter's request, but it was for Sookie. My heart soared after business was complete, as she accepted when I asked for a dance. Being this close to her body ignited sensations in my body and brain, seemingly bringing me closer to my lost memories. But before I could grasp a clear image, the song ended and Sookie pulled back from my embrace. She left that night, and I made sure that Charles was aware of his instructions when doing his job: Protect Sookie at all costs.
A few nights had passed, and after discussing with Charles about his sleeping arrangement, I felt confusion and fear coming from Sookie. Before I was able to contact her, I received a phone call from a Fae. Claudine didn't greet me, just spoke of her involvement in pulling Sookie from a fire that had occurred in her house. After she hung up, I made my way to the shifter's bar to determine Sookie's injuries and to call out Charles for his inability to protect his mistress. I think it was my reaction to this event that cemented for Charles Sookie's importance to me. It was this response that placed Sookie in even more danger than usual. I almost got on my knees and begged for her to tell me of our time together, but her words cut me to the bone. She preferred me as I was, an amnesic vampire without the thousand years of memories. There was no other being that could hurt me as she did, but I knew that it was just a defence mechanism; she was doing what she felt best to protect herself.
After the fire I became aware that her friend from Club Dead was having issues with her vampire lover, and it was only getting worse. I felt that I could use this problem to my advantage. The circumstance in which I was able to obtain the information was not ideal, but at this point I was happy to get it whichever way I could. In exchange for the information I desired the most, I was to help Sookie remove this Mickey from her friends' life. Before I made one simple phone call to his Maker, Sookie delivered the news I wanted. She spoke about our time together, the places we had sex in, the offer to stay with her always, me taking another bullet meant for her, and her killing of the were-bitch Debbie Pelt. This information shocked me to my core, and it was then that the true nature of the curse was revealed. It wasn't in the first casting, but in the breaking of the spell. The second memory loss was the curse, the inability to remember my time with her. It crushed my soul knowing that Sookie had suffered more than I did, having to remember all of our time together. The ache in my chest was only small compared to what Sookie was feeling.
I made a mistake that night, telling her that thinking of her had become a nasty habit, and my thoughts on how I should deal with it. Should I bite and end her, or just fuck her again to see if it was the best I had ever had. Before I could do either, Mickey had discovered Sookie's location, pissed off with his Maker calling him home. I yet again put my own body on the line for her, taking a rock to the head. I was shocked when Sookie gave me her wrist, allowing me to get the blood needed to heal. I watched helplessly as Sookie invited Mickey in, and he attacked her. But Sookie never disappointed me, and had the mind to rescind his invitation, sending him back outside. As we dealt with her friend and cleaned up her apartment, I began to worry more about her, thinking that she was living wrong when so much continued to come against her.
I had been caught up in many problems, mainly surrounding Long Shadow's Maker, Hot Rain, and his need for more reparation for his child's death, so much so that I didn't see the connection between Charles and the attempts on Sookie's life. The attack on the shifter and the fire at Sookie's house were perpetrated by Charles in payment for my staking of Long Shadow. Hot Rain deemed a death of my own loved one a sufficient payment for his loss. It wasn't until Compton used his database to trace Charles 'blood' line that I was made aware of his pledging to Hot Rain. I tried to contact Sookie at the shifter's bar, but was constantly diverted by Charles answering the phone. I even sent Bubba to make Sookie aware of Charles's intention, but his return to the bar didn't leave me with much hope of his warning to her. Desiring to be a hero to Sookie by protecting her from Charles, I made my way to her, only to arrive too late. The townsfolk, the same people that look at Sookie like she is a freak, saved her from Charles's attack and staked the bastard. As much as I was annoyed at the loss of enjoyment of ending another life for Sookie, I was more than happy for the deed to be done. Sookie's safety was more important than vengeance.
I tried to get her to realize the reasoning behind Hot Rain and Charles's plan, but she refused to see the bigger picture. She was attacked because she meant more to me than all else in the world. She didn't understand that my affection for her reflected that of the bond that Hot Rain and Long Shadow had, one that was forged in love at the time of Long Shadow's turning. Her connection to me and my world had yet again put her in danger, and her remoteness to her near death made me worry about her life once again. I couldn't resist a kiss before I left to head back to Fangtasia, and I asked her if she had responded in kind to my avowal that she was the best I have ever had. I felt heartache through the bond, and knew that remembering was even harder than forgetting.
The night on her porch when she had gotten herself dressed up to go on a 'date' with that were-tiger was nearly enough to cause me to throw her over my shoulder and fly her back to my house. When I spoke those words to Quinn, 'This woman has been mine, and she will be mine,' I knew I was done for. But her stubbornness won out. She left that night with that beast, and I went back to the club with a seemingly familiar emotion running through my body: jealousy. I think that this event was made even more emotional due to the fact that I still couldn't remember any of my time with her during my curse. There had been thoughts, feelings, and glimpses, but nothing I could hold onto to bring closer so I could examine them. Along with Sookie's stubbornness in not giving me more detailed accounts of what we did, my inability to remember was weighing heavily on me. I haven't felt this powerless since I was first made Vampire by my maker and subjected to cruelties that no man should face. I remembered EVERYTHING else, but those few days with her were still lost to me.
Even though it was a flimsy excuse, I informed the Queen of my coming to New Orleans to discuss the upcoming summit. In reality I wanted to be close to Sookie. I knew she was to head to her cousin's apartment, who not only had met her final death at the hands of another vampire, but was the beloved child of Queen Sophie-Anne. I knew that Bill was going with her, finding a way to intercept Sookie's interaction with the Queen. I had discovered within the first hours of my arrival that Compton had actually been sent by Her Majesty to procure Sookie and her abilities. He was to embed himself into her life, learning about her abilities and seducing her if needed to bring her to a place that she would be comfortable with working for the Queen. I was unsure if the Queen intended to keep Sookie as a pet and eventually turn her, but Bill's inabilities as a vampire had removed him from Sookie's life. This in turn removed him as the go-between from Sookie and Queen Sophie-Anne. I found out in my discussion with the Queen that Sookie's cousin was the cause of Sookie's gift coming to the attention of Vampires. Hadley, while trying to stay in the good graces of her vampire lover, told of her Southern belle cousin, who would answer people's unasked questions, and would just know a little too much. It seems she was doomed from the moment Hadley caught Queen Sophie-Anne's eye, and Bill was just a means to an end. I had wished at that point that her cousin had died from her addictive ways, leaving Sookie to live the life she had prior to coming into my world. But at this point, that wasn't a possibility, and I was determined to protect her now that she was in so deep.
I was also resolute in removing Bill from her life completely. I knew she still harboured feelings for the vampire, but I wanted him gone. I knew that my reasoning was flawed and purely selfish, but Sookie should have the information I had learned from Queen Sophie-Anne. When I saw her in that hospital bed after the attack of a newly risen vampire, I nearly reconsidered my actions. But Compton sealed his fate by believing he had succeeded in intercepting Queen Sophie-Anne. As Bill started to tell Sookie of the real reason he was in Bon Temps, a pain so fierce ripped through my very soul, and I felt a heart-shattering cry from Sookie's own soul. The throbbing was so severe that I couldn't look at her, believing that it would only compound her feelings. I regret to this day that I left her in that hospital, but I was still unsure as to what Sookie would have allowed me to do for her.
I was only aware of Sookie's capture by some Weres after I had received a phone call from Andre. It seemed that she and the were-tiger were taken from her cousin's apartment. In an attempt to track her through my blood, I allowed Rasul, one of the Queen's guards, to accompany me in my search. It was not long after we set out that we found Sookie and Quinn in a small hunting cabin. As we drove up, we found Quinn in his tiger form, taking down several other Weres. I left Rasul to help subdue them as I went in search of Sookie. After I called out for her to invite me in, I found her in the kitchen on top of a rather nasty looking girl. In any other situation I would have found it arousing, but the thought of Sookie with anyone else in a sexual situation riled me up; the desire to have her as my own was strong. I had asked her to step back from the bitch, and I was able to take control of her.
I was in shock after Sookie informed me of her fairy blood. It explained a lot about the attractiveness she had to the supernatural community, but it didn't affect my own feelings. Before I could say another word to her, she leapt into a tangent about me not liking her for her, only stopping when the Were told her he himself didn't care about her blood. I watched with jealousy when Sookie jumped up and went to Quinn, checking him over for any signs of damage. I decided to move into the other room, make sure Rasul had the situation under control, and tie up the were-bitch. When Sookie entered the room, she was dressed in another man's clothes, which were way too big. Regardless of her clothing she looked beautiful, a sentiment that I knew that other males in the room would agree with. As Sookie questioned the Weres, the family of Debbie Pelt, I studied her emotions. Fatigue was strong, as was trepidation for past deeds that were to be revealed. Even though I still could not remember my time with her, she asked me for my consent to tell the Pelts of our involvement in their daughter's death. After all was said, I felt great relief from Sookie, as if a massive weight had been lifted off her shoulders. I realized yet again that she had been living under the weight of what we had done. I couldn't share with her this burden because I still had yet to rediscover my memories of our time together. As we left the cabin and delivered her back to her cousin's apartment, I was lost in my thoughts, angry at myself for not seeing what the memories of our time together were doing to Sookie, and why I still was unable to remember. I went to rest that day feeling like an utter failure. In my thousand years I had never felt like I did at that point.
I was blown away with Sookie as she walked through the ballroom door on the arm of the were-tiger for the first joint function of Sophie-Anne and her new husband, Peter Threadgill. The dress didn't leave much to the imagination, and I once again wished it was my arm she held. But she had made her situation clear, and even though the desire raged, I held back. She would be mine again. I watched in awe as Sookie gracefully moved through the room, and was intrigued by her interaction with Queen Sophie-Anne. It wasn't until the Queen and Threadgill took to the floor did I notice that the Queen had a bracelet that wasn't there before. I knew from Threadgill's demeanor that something was about to happen. When one of his guards attacked Wybert, removing his head from his body, I became aware of the conflict that had started. I looked around that room, trying to locate Sookie in the commotion. I discovered her hiding place near a column and made my way there, when I realized that Quinn had deserted his post at her side. I pushed her to the ground, yet again covering her body with my own.
Being on top of her, even in the dire situation we had found ourselves in, was bliss. It felt like home, and I couldn't stop myself from taking a kiss of her lips. My bloodlust was soaring, and the close proximity triggered my protective urges. I brought together my need to protect her with that of my loyalties to my Queen, getting involved in the battle that raged within the ballroom. I took down the Vampire that ended Wybert's life, and joined Andre in the defence of our Queen. In the heat of the battle, I lost track of Sookie, but I thought I saw Bill come to her aid. I fought with honour, and in no time we had eliminated the Arkansas Vampires. With the removal of the Queen by her remaining children, the other Sheriffs and I were left to help clean up the mess. I was unaware of who Sookie had sought shelter with, but from the emotions I felt from her I knew she safe.
In the aftermath of the attack, time flew by, even for an immortal such as myself. The hurricane that devastated the Gulf Coast also heavily impacted the Vampire population. I had spent numerous hours searching for records of our vampire brethren, using the database that Compton developed to help in our search. We also had to prepare for the summit that had been conveniently postponed on several occasions. It was a disturbing notion that seemed to indicate it was done on purpose, an idea that Sookie herself brought to our attention during the meeting the week prior to the summit. As I watched my child enter with Sookie, my body awoke, feeling as if these past weeks I'd been at rest. My blood in her already fought to be close to me, and her scent filled my office. My mind flashed back to the night of the maenad attack, when she was naked but for my own shirt. She sat in my chair, and I knew even then the desire this woman brought out of me. I watched Sookie throughout the meeting, watching how she interacted with the vampires in my retinue and with Andre. I knew I had to watch Sookie carefully with him, as I knew he often had his own agenda apart from the Queen.
During conversations with me, Pam had uncovered the extent of my feelings for Sookie. Pam has never been without a pet, but the use of them for blood and sex was the only reason they were kept. She never formed any stronger attachment to them, and only gave one or two her blood, and that was only to maintain control over them. In her mind she couldn't understand the need I felt for Sookie. After one particular conversation, I noticed Pam had left the bar. I could feel Pam's determination through our bond and followed her to Bon Temps. I landed in the shadows and listened to Pam basically calling Sookie out on her feelings. She spoke of my distraction during my waking hours, and how she thought Sookie should 'give me a break'. Sookie looked and felt weary, and I could tell Pam's verbal assault wasn't helping Sookie's mood. I sent Pam on her way and approached Sookie. I couldn't resist lifting her chin up and having a taste of her lips. It felt like coming home, and Sookie reacted in the same way. It was she who pulled back after a while, with her heart pounding and breathing ragged. I inquired after the tiger, knowing already that she hadn't seen him since New Orleans. She paid me back in harsh words, saying that with my lack of visual affection she was well in her rights to find another companion. I stupidly brought up Compton's deception, which caused Sookie great pain. I tried to reason with her, telling her that it was better this way, because it wasn't right for her to still have feelings for him and to think better of him than he deserves. She withdrew into herself and inquired why I was so moody. Unable to tell her directly how deep my feelings were for her, I spoke to her about the curse, and why it had sent me running down her road. She tried yet again to tell me that my affection for her was related to her Fae blood, and all I could do was answer a firm 'No'. I sensed her fatigue and decided that it was time to head back to the bar. I left her outside Merlotte's, unable to say what I wanted to.
The schedule for the summit would be gruelling, and I wasn't sure if I could get some private time with Sookie. I was aware that this was only her second trip out of state, and I wanted to be able to show her around the city. I was in the room I was to share with Pam when the King of Mississippi, Russell, came to my door asking me to officiate his wedding ceremony with his vampire lover, the King of Indiana. With his enthusiasm I knew that this was one monarch wedding that was for love and not the usual political motives. I was handed the ceremonial knife as I came on stage, with the tiger calling all in the room to order. As I stepped forward, I knew that Sookie was in the room, and a brief smile came across my face. I conducted the ceremony as deemed necessary to make it official. When it was done, I watched Sookie join the Queen in her meandering through the crowd. In a moment of distraction, I lost track of Sookie. I became concerned when I noticed that Andre was missing from Sophie-Anne's side. I felt Sookie's distress and tracked her through our one-sided blood tie. I found her trapped against a wall in a corridor, with Andre trying to force his blood into her mouth.
Even though I wanted to rush at Andre, knocking him off Sookie's body, I held back because I was unsure as to what was actually happening. If it was the Queen's will to have Sookie bonded to Andre, then I was powerless to stop him. But I could see from Sookie's body language and all the emotions running through our tie that she was near breaking point. I knew I had to tread carefully but thought I could appeal to Andre, making him realize that a distressed and uncooperative telepath isn't a very trustworthy one. I knew that Andre wouldn't deliberately put his Maker at risk, and he took me at my word. I did inform him of the relationship I have had with Sookie, leaving out the part that it wasn't current. As much as I wanted Sookie and I to be bonded permanently, this was not the circumstance in which I wanted it to occur, and having Andre witness it would come back to haunt us. I tried to get Andre to allow us to retire to a private room, as I really wanted to get Sookie relaxed and aroused so the experience would be a pleasant one for her. But, alas, Andre required it to occur then and there. I tried to express to Sookie how sorry I was for this, but she said my name with such sadness that I knew she would come to regret this joining. She resigned herself to the will of my Queen and offered her neck to me in submission. I hated seeing her so lost and alone, and drew my robe around her to give us some form of privacy. With her refusal to have sex during our exchange, something I wasn't prepared to do anyway with Andre with us, I struck quickly, though I did savour the taste of her blood. The last time she willingly gave me her blood was not linked to the best of memories, and with the possibility of Sookie coming to hate our connection, I knew I had to commit to memory her taste. When I had taken enough, I moved to give her my wrist. She surprised me at the time when she unbuttoned my shirt and went to bite one of my nipples. Wanting to make this as easy as possible for her, I took out the knife I had used in the marriage ceremony to cut my chest. As her lips came in contact with my flesh, I had flashes of the other times she had taken in my blood. With her blood circulating through my system and my own entering hers, I could feel the bond forming. The power of the emotions I was feeling nearly overwhelmed me, and I realized as the wound closed that I had orgasmed against her. It was at that moment the tiger found us and began to curse and proclaim that 'his woman' didn't take orders from Andre. Sifting through all the emotions in the bond, I felt Sookie's hatred towards Andre, her annoyance at Quinn's words, and her overall sadness as to what had just been done. She left the three of us in that hallway and once again ran from her problems, though I actually don't blame her for that.
I was making my way back to the Queen after I had changed from my robe, when Batanya, the bodyguard to the King of Kentucky, informed the assembled vampires that a bomb had been discovered on the floor on which Sophie-Anne's suite was. From the bond I could tell Sookie was scared, and knew then that it was she who had discovered the bomb. Finding the nearest stairwell, I raced towards her and tried to send calm to her. As I came to the door nearest to Sookie, I could hear the tiger's harsh words, basically condemning her for her actions. I could feel her fear even more, and her hurt when she spoke about the lack of vampires that had come to her aid. I stepped out of the stairwell at that point to prove to her that the vampire that willingly bonded to her was here, to die alongside her if it came to it. She couldn't be aware of the agony I would feel at her death, and that I would do all that was in my power to make sure that didn't happen for a very long time. As in the past, Sookie was more worried about others than the situation she had found herself in. I thought that our bond may allow me to glamour her into handing over the bomb, but Sookie's stubbornness won through, with her brushing off my glamour. I moved closer to her, seeing that my presence was making her less tense. Quinn decided that he could bully Sookie into giving in and putting down the can that held the bomb. He didn't know her well. As I was plotting the ways I could remove the tiger from existence, the elevator door opened and a police robot rolled out, surveyed the scene, and rolled back in. I made a comment about my dislike of such technology, and Sookie replied as if we were catching up at the bar. She was running on pure adrenaline, and I could tell it was starting to take a toll on her.
We were joined by a Vampire bomb squad member, who tried to have both Quinn and me leave, which just wasn't going to happen. If Sookie was to die, I was going to follow right behind her. When the vampire had contained the object and had gone back down the stairwell, I moved to comfort Sookie, but as she collapsed, the tiger got to her first. As I looked on, it was clear that Sookie had made her choice. She had chosen Quinn for comfort instead of me and our bond. I couldn't linger with her anymore. I couldn't witness this human, for whom I had put my life in the line of fire, with another man. I saw her briefly later in the night, when the Queen had called all to her room to discuss the incident. I didn't need a bond with her to tell that the past few hours had been harsh on her, and when she snapped at Sophie-Anne, I knew she was at breaking point. I knew she would dislike the bond that was formed, but thought she could see that I was the lesser of two evils. But, then again, it had been many years since I thought like a human. I went to rest that day feeling just as drained as I knew Sookie did.
I awoke with a message from Andre that the trial we assumed was cancelled due to the death of Threadgill's second, was back on. Seeing as the dance would continue after the trial was concluded, and the fact that the Queen would be successful in beating the charge, I dressed in my tux. Andre was the one that delivered Sookie to the ballroom, and I knew that she would be the only human in the room. I needed her to be strong, so I made sure that I didn't let my own concern for the verdict to seep through the bond. I positioned myself behind Sophie-Anne, showing support for our Queen. I saw strength in Sookie during the Queen's trial that I haven't seen for centuries. She faced off against the highest authority in the Vampire hierarchy, the Ancient Pythoness, seemingly unaware of the dangers she faced. I unconsciously moved to back her as she put questions to the remaining Arkansas vampire. I sent strength to Sookie, using our bond to give her the courage she would need to do what she did best, to bring forth the truth. Her testimony nearly got her killed, however, as an arrow made its way towards her. I hesitated in moving in front of it like I did with the bullet when I was cursed, but the tiger took it instead. I had asked her then about her feelings for him, trying to sort through the emotions in the bond. I could tell she loved me once, but luckily the feelings for Quinn were not even close. As we dealt with the aftermath of the attack, she kept her hand in mine, allowing me to give her comfort.
The excitement of the trial had died down; the organisers transformed the ballroom to splendour and glory. Music started up and we were all treated to a display of Vampire talent in the form of dancers Sean and Layla, dance partners and lovers tied together for eternity. As Sookie watched the show, I basked in her joy at the display before her. I went to her and pulled her onto the dance floor. We danced together, which triggered deep feelings in us both. Her blood sang to me, proving what she herself couldn't say in words: I made her happy, and it wasn't just the blood. I could feel that annoying prickle of images from the past, small glimpses that showed me that her happiness and love were from before Andre forced us to bond. We twisted and turned, and I made her fly. It made me feel alive, and I revelled in the feelings.
I could feel a pulling at my mind, as well as my body. I could feel fear ripping through my body, enough to pull me out of my daytime slumber. When my eyes had opened, I could see the terror in Sookie's as she urged me to awaken. Drawing strength from our newly formed bond, I was able to get myself off the bed and help Sookie get Pam into one of the coffins. With the building crumbling around us with the force of the Fellowship of the Sun's bombs, we pushed our way out of the window. Sunlight hit my face for the first time in a thousand years. I was able to will myself to fall gently to earth with Sookie in my arms. I knew that Pam would survive the fall, but Sookie would not. As we came in contact with the ground, I moved towards Pam, needing to cover her with the ceremonial cloak that Sookie had placed on me before we broke through the glass. As soon as we were both covered, Sookie took charge, and I couldn't have been prouder of her than I was at that moment. She called over several paramedics and told them what needed to happen. As Pam and I were being loaded into waiting ambulances, I fell into my daytime rest, but was aware of Sookie's continuing efforts in rescuing others trapped in the building. As night fell, I discovered that Sookie had indeed risen to her true potential, and together with Stan Davis's telepath, had discovered and rescued many humans and vampires from the rubble. Cataliades had informed me of her return to Bon Temps because she was afraid that her abilities had come to the attention of the law enforcement officials. She was already being exploited in her mind by Sophie-Anne, and she didn't want to add the government as well. I stayed with Pam in Rhodes till we were both well enough to move.
Dealing with the aftermath of the bombing was difficult for us all. Andre was lost, as were many others from across the states that attended. Many more were seriously injured, including Sophie-Anne. With Sigebert to guard her, and all the sheriffs running the states, many of us knew what was likely to come. It was Sookie, however, that gave us the sign that a takeover was coming. But I had more pressing matters to deal with. It had become known to me that Sookie was a Fae princess, being the great-granddaughter of one of the remaining fairy princes, Niall Brigant. I should have known after the fairy Claudine had called me about the fire at Sookie's house that she was important to them. Who else would qualify for a 'fairy godmother' but a blood relation to the prince? Knowing of my newly formed blood bond with Sookie gave Niall the avenue to gain the meeting with Sookie that he had no doubt been putting off since she was born. Just thinking of the what-ifs involved made me grateful for his delay in meeting her. If she had been taken under his wing, I would have never met her, and my existence wouldn't be much of a life to lead, even if Sookie was in danger constantly being around us all.
Sookie's reaction to my asking her for one night was painful to hear. Even though she had had no contact with the tiger since Rhodes, she still held out hope for their reunion. It hurt me still, her refusal to acknowledge our feelings for each other. But I did as I said I would, taking her to see the fairy. The feeling of her during the ride was bliss, and I could only think of one thing that could surpass the feeling of being in her presence. But I knew that a more physical relationship would take time, with her attachment still to the tiger. I was content to savour the taste of her lips before leading her inside. Waiting for her outside of the restaurant was painful. I had her with me, and she was spending time with a fairy. I knew she would smell divine when she left Niall, and I had been steeling myself for the raw lust that would be triggered, though I really didn't need any more than I always have when surrounded by her normal scent.
As the hours passed, I made sure to curb the thirst I would feel after her time with Niall, and I was right when she came out. I told her that when she smelt of Fae, I just wanted to fuck and bite and rub myself all over her. The smell was heavenly, enhancing her natural scent. I fought the need to take her, make love to her, to turn her, and I answered what questions she had about the Fae to distract myself. Her hurt at yet another supernatural group's desire to hurt her weighed heavy on us both, and I vowed to watch over her even more. The drive back was silent, as I was trying to think of the things I have wanted to tell her since I have known how deep my feelings ran. It was interrupted by a police car, which was deceptive in appearance once Sookie became aware that it was a Were sent to take her out. I once again took a bullet destined for her, and I disposed of the vile animal intent on harming my woman. Unable to determine who sent him, I took her back to her house, not leaving without first trying to get her to donate some blood for my healing. As much as she wanted me, she turned me down, sending me home to memorize the smell of her and the feelings she evoked inside me.
After several phone calls between Herveaux and Sookie, I pieced together the attack the previous night. Seeing as the Jackson pack had internal issues, I had hoped that Sookie would not be pulled into it. It was only when Pam had returned from a night with her new pet, which turned out to be the witch that Sookie had brought back from her last trip to New Orleans, that I learned of Sookie's involvement in a Were war. She was not severely injured, but she was shaken up. I would have attended to her myself, but several more sightings have occurred over the state of unfamiliar vampires asking questions. As I went to rest that morning, I knew the next night was going to bring some very big changes for Sookie and
Following the protocol that was set in place after Rhodes, I initiated the call chain, but was unable to get in touch with anyone. It was then I knew the takeover had begun. I knew it would only be a matter of time until they made their way here, and I knew I had to get to where I belonged: with Sookie. If I was going to meet my final death, it would be in defence of Sookie. I wholeheartedly believed they knew of her talents and would keep her alive. I continued to try unsuccessfully to contact the other sheriffs, and then I received a phone call from Clancy telling me that the club had been surrounded by vampires from Nevada. It was Felipe de Castro that had seized the opportunities presented to him by the Rhodes bombing. I made a terrible judgement call by calling Pam back to the club, but there was a small semblance of luck, as de Castro wanted to keep me and mine for the new authority. As I made my way to Sookie's house, I tried to mentally prepare myself for what was to come. I knew I had to protect Sookie, and in the event that my death was certain, I would make sure they kept her alive.
Once I made it to the back door, Bill granted me access, and I was pleased that Sookie hadn't rescinded my invitation. I checked throughout the house, making sure it was secure. The witch thought that my coming would endanger them more, but she naively thought Sookie would be safer without protection. The Nevada contingent would have come with force and would most likely kill the witch. As I reached for the gun that Sookie thought she needed, I was hit with a flash: Sookie putting the gun here, tired from something gruesome and depressing. Sookie looked at me in wonderment, but talk of what I knew would have to wait as both Bill and I stiffened with the sounds of approaching cars. Victor had arrived, bringing many of his fellow Nevada vampires with him. Sookie was shocked to hear Quinn out with the vampires, and it was then I noticed his sister in the room. So he had made one last ditch effort to save Sookie, though it was he that had brought this all down on her head. As we waited for Victor to make his approach towards the house and his greetings to those of us inside, I tried to send strength and love through our bond. If I was to die this night, I wanted her to be strong enough to carry on, and to know the extent of my feelings for her. I moved to kiss her for what may have been the last time, and reassured her of her importance and her survival.
Even through her fear, Sookie couldn't remove herself from her southern upbringing, playing the perfect host to the invading vampire. Victor, the shrewd businessman that had made himself and de Castro very successful vampires, went straight to the point of the matter. Most of those I had known during my time in Louisiana were dead, and those that were mine were being held at Fangtasia, awaiting orders from Victor. Everything hinged on where I would choose to place my loyalties. The calm that had fallen over the house while Victor awaited my answer had been broken by the Were's sister, which caused the Tiger to break down the front door. While being distracted by the stupidity of Quinn, I noticed Sookie trying to connect a call to Niall. I took the phone from her hand and flung it away, trying to make her realize that bringing him into the situation would only lead to Victor's death and a declaration of war towards the vampires. With Niall's own Fae struggles, I knew that he would find it hard to fight both wars.
Compton nearly made the situation worse by calling me out on my lack of declaration of my own death for Sookie's survival. A constant hothead to the end was Compton, but at least I knew that when I spoke the words 'Even more pertinently, if anything happens to her, forces you can't imagine will be set into motion,' I knew they were not idle threats. Knowing there was no other way to ensure the survival of us all, and there being no way to bring back those we had lost, I accepted the sovereignty of the King of Nevada. Victor called back his vampire at Fangtasia and I was able to contact Pam, both telling her of our survival and congratulating her on taking out so many after she had escaped. I watched as Victor left with his vampires, most likely to report back to de Castro and to make his way south to his new home in New Orleans. Sookie and all that had sworn fealty to me were safe, and I had said a small prayer to my past gods for the safe passage of those we had lost that night.
I knew I needed to find a quiet space in her house after the situation had calmed down. I made my way through her house, finding myself in her bedroom. As soon as I came in contact with her bed, the floodgates opened in my mind, and I was brought to my knees with the images that came to mind. I remembered the feeling of loneliness within me while I was running down that dark road, which only abated when Sookie had stepped out of her car and called my name. I saw Sookie cleaning my feet, taking care of me even through the exhaustion she had been feeling from her job. The images came thick and fast, the surfaces we made love on, the shower in which Sookie had given herself to me, the conversations on the rug underneath that hideous blanket. The intensity of the feelings that had been awoken in me once again made me realize just how much Sookie had suffered during my second memory loss. What I had felt during my time in her house only made the feelings I had developed after my time there all the more real, and I had hoped Sookie knowing that I had recovered my memories would make her see that it wasn't the bond talking. My feelings for her were real, organic and alive. I knew then that I had to make her mine again, and to use every night for the rest of time to prove to her the depth of the feelings I had for her.
So as I sit here, waiting for Sookie, sensing her getting closer to the bar, closer to me, I can feel an emotion I'm not comfortable with surface: nervousness. I was nervous about her response to my marriage proposal, and to how she would react when she became aware of the knife's true meaning. I was doing this partly to save her from de Castro and Victor's desire to have her as their own; it was the only way to keep her having a resemblance of a normal life. Yes, if she cooperated with Victor or de Castro, she would be given a more than comfortable life. She would be spoiled beyond her imagination. But she would be in a gilded cage, a prisoner in the lap of luxury.
I was determined not to let this happen. I have known for a very long time that I would do anything for this woman, and putting myself at odds again with the new establishment was the only way I could see to protect her now. I was not sure if this plan would continue to keep her safe, as it is well known that both Victor and de Castro are very determined Vampires. And, like me, they would not stop to get what they wanted if they put their mind to it. I would win against Victor, being older than he, but de Castro, he would be a different story. But I must succeed in keeping her safe; it is my main reason for getting her into this marriage. I am determined to have her as mine again.
I feel Sookie enter the bar, stopping to talk with Pam at the door. As she makes her way through the swarm of disgusting fangbangers, I brace myself for my body's reaction to the sight of her. Today I had asked her to marry me. Yes, it wasn't a human marriage, but it was a marriage I felt strongly about.
Today brings me closer to the day that Sookie will be mine again.