A/N: Another S4 one, sorry. I just couldn't help myself. I was watching 2x05, and this is basically a re-telling of Chuck's "Bar Fight" except with, of course, Blair in the mix. The similarities are on purpose.
Summary: It was harder than he thought it would be. Seeing Her every day. It was hard enough to attempt to pretend to get over her with a nice girlfriend in tow. But now he felt it. The persona that he had tried to bury as the surgeons tried to remove the bullet from his insides.
Disclaimer: Basic idea came from The Serena Also Rises and my inner angst towards "Good Chuck." Beta-ed and encouraged by awesome comewhatmay.x. Title comes from The Duke Spirit, the song that was playing in the bar while Chuck and Dan were in a bro-mance in the making. Right before they went to jail.
He had to be alone. The bar was practically empty as he winced at the feeling of scotch hitting the back of his throat. A sensation that he hadn't felt since before he took the virginity of a skanky rat-haired blonde.
It was harder than he thought it would be. Seeing Her every day. Those eyes that knew him to his core. It was hard enough to attempt to pretend to get over her with a nice girlfriend in tow. But now he felt it. The persona that he had tried to bury as the surgeons tried to remove the bullet from his insides.
It was happening. He could feel Chuck Bass emerging against his will again and he knew exactly why. He knew that Chuck Bass raised his head and sniffed the air that Blair Waldorf's perfume permeated. Chuck Bass felt desire pull and tug within him. He couldn't let it happen. He couldn't let Chuck Bass emerge because he would just hurt her again.
It was how he found himself drinking in a bar at four in the morning with a scantily clad co-ed eying him appreciatively. Because no matter how deep he tried to bury his natural instinct, that animalistic attraction was always there. Women still looked at him the way they always had. He was finally understanding that there was nothing he could do about that. There was nothing he could do to stop himself from being Chuck Bass.
He just wished he could hide it from Eva long enough. He wasn't sure what he was waiting for, but he couldn't let her see. See what Blair's eyes seemed to have seen all along. What they loved him for.
The stool next to him screeched and he looked to his side to see what he had really been dreading since he had returned to the city. The company of women had never been difficult to obtain when it came to him but no one had seemed to get the memo that he wasn't Chuck Bass anymore. She certainly didn't, if the hand on his arm was any evidence.
Already drunk to the bone, Chuck Bass had already forgotten all about propriety and embarrassment because he found himself shoving her off of him with a blatant "don't." It was at the searing pain that he realized he must have said something slightly more bluntly insulting as he crumpled to the floor, groaning in pain. His head was then being cradled and he looked up into kind blue eyes and sighed.
Eva's eyes weren't looking at him, however, but angled higher. He turned to his side to see unmistakable calves in even more unmistakable stilettos. The most beautiful legs, he would have to say with beautiful taste and he could recognize Blair Waldorf from anywhere. Even from this angle.
Not knowing what he was doing, he reached out to caress the pretty ankle that displayed its right in front of him. The arms that were holding him tightened angrily and he knew he was touching the heelbone of a girl that was not his girlfriend. Without even looking back, Blair's foot knocked his hand away impatiently, aware of how to dislodge herself.
"...well, it's not his fault you dress like a high-class call-girl."
Blair's assertive tone was additionally something that he could recognize anywhere even as his vision spotted with pain. And then she was at his side, looking into his eyes. At first he was lost. He had forgotten what it was like for someone who knew your soul so well to look so deep into it. And then he realized she wasn't really looking at him at all.
"Are you going to vomit?"
Her blunt question made him realize that she wasn't looking at him at all. She was checking his vitals.
"You'll live," she ascertained. Chuck couldn't help but shake his head.
He felt sick.
He should have known that she wouldn't dare to look at him like that with his girlfriend holding his head right there.
Chuck Bass looked so pitiful, in a heap on the ground like that. Blair sighed and stood up, reaching out her hand.
"I think we're okay."
If Blair wasn't very much mistaken, that sounded like venom in Eva's voice. But Eva was a good girl. And would never speak to someone else in that manner. Least of all Chuck Bass's very tempestuous ex.
"Chuck," Blair said. "Are you going to be okay?"
He was looking up at her with those narrow eyes that she refused to let affect her and he shook his head like he couldn't speak. Blair reached down and helped pull him to his feet.
"I think we're-"
"We have to take him outside," Blair said, for the first time ignoring the girl beside him while they went into the alley behind the bar.
Before Eva could even ask, the sound of Chuck retching was unmistakably heard echoing off the walls.
"Alcohol mixed with getting kneed in the groin is not a good combination," Blair said. "He would know."
"I've never seen him like that," Eva said in wonder.
"You're lucky," Blair said distantly before the sound of vibrations sounded from her clutch. Blair unlatched it to read the text she just received. She felt Eva's eyes on her face as she studied the text before brusquely shutting it.
"Was that your boyfriend?"
"We should get him back inside," Blair said instead, taking Chuck by the arm, supporting him so he could get himself back through the bar.
"I'll be lucky if I can ever reproduce again," Chuck slurred delicately.
"No, we'll all be lucky if you can never reproduce ever," Blair commented. She felt Chuck's light laughter and wished she didn't. Because it meant that Eva heard it too. Chuck leaned against the doorframe of the bar but she realized that Eva had lagged behind. Blair turned.
"You just know him so much more than I do," she said. "You know him so well."
"No," Blair said. "I know Chuck Bass. And that's not him anymore."
"You call him Chuck," Eva pressed. Blair smiled bitterly.
"Force of habit."
This time Eva did follow Blair into the bar and everyone seemed to pause at the figure at the entrance. Blair sighed and walked towards Dan Humphrey.
"Did you get my text?" he asked quietly as they both felt the other couple staring at them from across the way.
"Sorry," Blair said. "Chuck had a bit of a problem."
Dan's eyes raised and she wondered what that insecurity felt like. The same that Eva seemed to be feeling as well.
"Apparently calling a girl a whore earns you a knee in the groin these days," Blair said.
"I thought he didn't do that anymore."
"What?" Blair asked. "Calling a girl a prostitute or getting kneed in the groin?"
"Both," Dan laughed. Blair nodded and felt the lapse in conversation that usually occurred. He was looking at her in that pensive artist way that annoyed her and made her positive that he was more meant for Vanessa than ever. She just didn't want to be another one of his subjects. "We don't fit."
Blair looked at him quizzically.
"We don't fit," he repeated, "do we? You and him... You two are just a match. But we..."
"Well I don't have a match anymore," Blair said. "And we both knew that when this first started. Are you changing your mind?"
"No," Dan said. "We both knew what this was when we started."
"But I want us to leave," Dan said. "Now."
"You don't have to be jealous of him," Blair said. "There isn't a Chuck Bass to be jealous of anymore."
"I'm not," Dan said and she knew that he was telling the truth. "I just wonder if you know that too."
"I'm trying," Blair said. "I really am."
She just wished he didn't sound so sorry. She hated being pitied.
Chuck Bass felt Eva support him as they walked hesitantly towards the entrance of the bar, watching an exchange between a couple that he had trouble believing, even while watching them with his own eyes. And he hated it. He hated it because he was jealous. She made him jealous of Dan Humphrey.
That was it. She was either some sort of goddess or some sort of demon woman because nothing of this earth could ever force him into such a predicament.
He watched Dan eye him over her exquisite shoulder as Blair and her boyfriend embraced.
He grew sick.
Chuck Bass grew vengeful.