AN: Okey. Some reviews. More fuckin' alerts than that though. Also, a flame! Can I respond to him/her directly w/o needing to do something like this? Nope! Flamers, you are another bunch of morons I and the fanfiction world can do without. Why? My rationale is that flamers are worthless, jealous sacks of garbage that refuse to log in merely because people like us can track them down and make fun of their own crappy stories. In fact, I think I'll answer your review riiiight here.

The review is for chapter 2, btw. Okay, my rationale for making those two women act like that is due to a few things. Yes, they are depressed, but one of them still has the hormones from pregnancy to deal with, and pregnant women are not exactly the most logical beings to deal with. Those hormones will remain for a while. Konan is naive to those sorts of things, and the emotions of essentially being forgiven, WHILE having her last friend (who was essentially insane for a long period of time) die in front of her will wreak havoc on her mind and emotions. Only sluts would do that? Huh. Well, this is a different example, but the premise for the erratic action is the same. Ever heard of Stockholm's Syndrome? Ya know, where you get kidnapped, and after a period of time, you start falling in love with your captor? The whole effect does not make an ounce of sense, yet it still happens in real life, and you're telling me that a few genuine comments that two women have not heard in a long time in their emotional states could not result in a glomp and a small makeout session that is most likely a one time thing? Remember, they are also shinobi, and they have a lot of other emotional baggage to deal with, so this could also play a part as well. And for your last statement, it's a reasonable statement and you are entitled to it. However, what one uses as a plot device is up to them.

Next time you flame, don't flame someone that has the intelligence to respond in turn. OR, have the guts to actually log in. I accept criticism, not anonymous 'you're a fucking moron' comments.

BTW, if you guys haven't noticed, this is an !Uzumaki Naruto. Every time I see someone making a Namikaze Naruto and they have him inherit millions of Ryo and other crap because it was "one of the founding clans" and what have you. Remember, Minato was one of those clanless, (prissy, according to Tomato-chan) geniuses that comes along once in a great while. Just because he was well versed in Space-time ninjutsu doesn't give him a bloodline. Plausibility, people! Plausibility! Thinking outside the box and coming up with new ideas is one thing and highly encouraged, but going around and creating aspects that are so highly unrealistic that it just rends any semblance of opposition to shreds just drives me nuts.

Ok, I need to explain myself on crossovers. I was not all that specific on directing my hate. Crossovers that gently use aspects from other universes is fine. But remember, gently, motherfuckers! Minor aspects are fine, and good for plot twists that will eventually escalate into something wonderful. Tossing in Barthandalus (Fal 'cie pope guy that turns into ugly-ass face-mecha-thing) from FF13 is not only random, crazy, uncalled for, but plot destroying. Not sure how he'd actually fit into any reasonable plot that ends well, but just go with the example, m'kay?

Now, more complaints on fanfiction. I guess I can come up with a few of these now and then.

1. Authors that do not make any effort whatsoever to correct their writing when it concerns their English skills. I know it might be because I've been turning into the Simon Cowell of FFNet as of late, but when morons keep priding themselves on their "awesomeness" and absolutely refuse to clean up their format, as well as their spelling, then FUCKING PAY ATTENTION!

I'm no English teacher. Far from it. BUT! English IS my native speaking language. I've written stories for fun and had High School English teachers go over them. In fact, my original story, Scion's Grimoire is one of those. (I prolly ain't gonna touch that for a while.) It is a fact that I am quite proficient in the written and spoken English languages. I can also write in a Novel Style format. I don't do an exact Novel Style format when on ffnet for the fact that increased separation makes it easier on the readers to stay focused and not have their attention drawn elsewhere, like, for example, the line you just read. Believe me, I've done it. Eight times in a row. Friggin' clusterfuck, is what it was.

2. Bloodlines that make no sense for Naruto to ever have, simply because of the power that they give, and authors that give him more than 2 overpowered bloodlines. (Overpowered is a term that can be debated, but the easiest way to determine overpowering is "can it do what the Sharingan can?". Hell, Kishimoto makes the Rinnegan seem weaker than the Sharingan.)

It becomes just a murder-fest for Naruto, and then jealous Sasuke comes along, "Where did the dobe get that power? I am an Uchiha! An elite! I deserve that power to avenge my clan!" Because that's how Sasuke acts in 99% of fanfics where Naruto has a bloodline/s.

Now, for my analysis on the three great Doujutsu. Right, the Rinnegan is NOT the Sage's eye. Neither is the Sharingan. If you've seen pictures of the Rikudou Sennin, his eyes are a combination of both, leading me to believe that there was a certain reason for the different eyes.

The Rinnegan is weaker than the Sharingan overall. It has weaknesses that cannot be simply undone by replacing your eyes with someone else's. To fully utilize the Rinnegan, according to what I've seen so far in the Manga, is that you must create the Six Paths of Pain, by splitting your power and consciousness among six other bodies that are dead. This can be taxing for most minds, and essentially renders your main body useless, as seen by what happened to Nagato. The advantages to this are obvious. You can attack with six different bodies at once, with none of them being yours. You can utilize all of those associated abilites at once as well, since they can use their chakra as well.

Based on what the Akatsuki has been doing, and the fact that the Sealing Statue has Rinnegan eyes, the Rinnegan is a powerful implement when sealing is involved. Madara was quite adamant that Konan 'returned' the eyes. The abilities of the Rinnegan, as well as the way they are utilized lead me to believe that they evolved from the Uzumaki clan, which may have splintered off as a result of a Senju and Uchiha getting together. (They were enemies, remember? It's not too farfetched to believe that out of a hundred people, 1 on each side would fall in love.)

This creates the problem of "Wait, then wouldn't the Uzumaki have Sharingan then?" and I have the easy explanation. The Senju never have a specific, set, bloodline. Each one has been different. These two may have been outcasts of their clans, in the Uchiha's case, being weaker than the others, and being ostracized. The Uchiha genes may have been weaker in this particular person's case, allowing for the Senju bloodline to be able to dominate the result of what comes out. The Uchiha's genes would stabilize the Senju's bloodline, resulting in a more concrete result, such as the Uzumaki's vitality, sealing prowess, the ability to sense malice (so far only shown in Naruto and Mito's cases, but I'm going to include it), Chakra chains (shown so far only with Kushina. Again, I'm going with it.) and extensive lifespan. With every generation or so, someone may manifest the Rinnegan, with the name representing the Uzumaki Clans ability to transcend their ancestor's hatred, and the appearance resembling that of a maelstrom or ripples, which is the Uzumaki namesake. I personally think that the color that they have in the manga/anime is just a result of the Uzumaki's eyes generally being a shade of greyish-purple. I doubt that any of the wielders in the past were in possession of any serious skill with the Rinnegan, or else they wouldn't have been killed off like that.

As for Madara claiming that Nagato's eyes were "his", it may just be that Madara activated dormant genes that brought them out.

In case you can't tell, I'm giving Naruto the Rinnegan. Deal with it. He won't be as skilled with it as Nagato was, and the skills will be quite limited in comparison to Nagato's as well. In fact, he's been developing it since before he left Konoha.

Now, simply put, the Sharingan is the nuke in Rock Paper Scissors. Everything that anyone does is simply countered by the Sharingan. As long as you have them and can see through them, you can't die. You can cast undying flames that burn hotter than anything in the world, cast a genjutsu that distorts time and makes the user capable of dying from sheer mental stress, summon a suit of skeletal armor of sorts that protects you from all harm as long as it's around you (as well as attack.), you can create an alternate dimension in space and teleport things there, control bijuu without any real effort... Let me know if I forget anything... Not to mention that all of those aforementioned techniques are named after Shinto gods and goddesses. I wonder what Izanami will do? Fuck off, Kishi.

Recent chapters in the Manga have also led me to believe that Uzumaki make the best Jinchuriiki. Naruto's pefect Jinchuuriki cloak resembles the Rikudou Sennin in general appearance.

... That was a theory that should have been concluded the first time I started babbling about it in this story... -_-;

Well, if anyone wants to use my theory in any of their fics, go ahead. Just let people know that I started the theory. If it proves true, then I should get a cookie... A nice, big, soft, freshly baked one... And maybe a harem of all the Naruto girls, and with a few taking a bath in the fountain of youth. Yes, even Koharu. Hey, she was quite good looking when she was in that flashback with Tobirama naming Hiruzen his successor. Currently, she is a saggy faced prune. I don't wanna hit that...


Complaints? Check.

Long-ass theory that took up space that I coulda used for the story? Check.

Me being a horny guy? Check check checkity check!

I do not own Naruto, or any of the women that star in it as well in the fashion that is politically correct now. Sad. I'd never need to spank my monkey again... Oh well.

Also, don't yell at me for wishing to own fictional women. And no, I'm not referring to half of the women in Hollywood!

Savior's Ascension, Chapter 5

"That's new."

"What? What the hell is it?"

"Oh my... It's..."


"Well, it's blue... That's different."

"B-blue? Whaddya mean by 'different'?"

"Well, I guess it was because Nagato's eyes were purple to begin with..." Konan muses.

"Wait, is there something wrong with my eyes?" Naruto shouts out, frantically.

"... I think you should have a look."

Naruto shot up instantly and ran over to the nearest water source, and looked at his reflection in the water. His blue eyes had two concentric rings in the iris. Naruto gracelessly fell backwards on his ass and stared off in that direction. Konan made her way over and sat next to the young Hokage on the grass, draping an arm over his shoulder. They sat that way for a few minutes, not even moving.

"... Pe-Nagato and I were related, weren't we?" Naruto finally asked.

"Not immediately, but he was an Uzumaki, yes." The paper user responds. "You're getting the Rinnegan ."

"That much I can tell just by looking at them..." Naruto says with a smirk. "But why now, after all this time?"

"It takes time, and yours may have been dormant. Did something happen that could have activated the manifestation?" Naruto looks at her with a deadpan expression on his face. "O-oh... Right... Um... Well, that wasn't long enough ago... Anything else?"

"Well, Itachi made me eat a magic crow."


"No, I'm serious." Naruto responds, standing up.

"Well, what makes you think that makes any difference?" She asks back, leaning back on her hands, pushing her bust out. Thankfully for Naruto, he wasn't really paying attention to that.

"Well, if someone shoved a bird down your throat, you'd kind of remember it as some kind of... Um... What's the word I'm looking for...?"

"Catalyst?" Konan offered.

"Yeah. That one." Naruto nods. "You'd remember something like that though... Too wierd to pass up."

"I suppose. We are shinobi though. Wierd is part of the job description." Konan shrugs. "Did Itachi say anything? He's not one for doing pointless things."

"Well, he said something about 'taking some of my power', and then he left." Naruto mused. "I think that was right before Sasuke killed him..."

"... I think that crow was part of his Yatagarasu..." Konan mused. "But that must have been what did it."

Hiashi finally made himself known, after listening in on most of the conversation.

"This is not how you relax, Hokage-sama." He chides. "Dwell on your eyes later."

"Hiashi-san, this is actually quite important." Konan responds neutrally. "The Rinnegan at its base level can manipulate gravity, so I think Naruto-kun should experiment with it in the time we have before we leave."

"Whatever happened with the chains that he was working on yesterday?" Hiashi asks.

"Don't ask." Naruto and Konan respond in perfect deadpanned sync. Hiashi shrugs and finds himself a spot to sit down at. He then activated his Byakugan and got comfortable.

"Well, I intended to relax, but I can help you with your chakra flow using my Byakugan, Hokage-sama."

"That would help. Naruto-kun, you remember Deva-path's gravity attack, Shinra Tensei, right?"

"Um, is that the one that blasts everything out of the way?"

"Yes. Now, imagine channeling your chakra through your eyes and then pool it at your hand." Konan orders.

"Alright, now what?"

"Hold it out, and imagine a wave of pure force emanating outwards, completely unstoppable." Konan continues. She gets a look of question from the both of the males. "T-that's how Nagato explained it to me... Back before the Paths of Pain were created."

"O-ok... Now, SHINRA TENSEI!" Naruto shouts. Nothing. "Um..."

"You managed to move a leaf. I noticed your chakra flow isn't filtering through your eyes like Konan-san said it should. Try again."

'Ok... Through my eyes, pool at my hand, imagine a wall of unstoppable force...'

"Shinra Tensei!" In a remarkable twist of fate, instead of a wall of unstoppable force emanating from Naruto's hand, an angry squirrel flew into his outstretched and proceeded to act like an angry squirrel. "AAAAGH! GET IT OFFA ME! GAAAAH!"

"That was Bashou Ten'in. The exact opposite of what you're supposed to do." Konan sighs, hand on her forehead.

"I had no idea what to make of it that time... I was more surprised at the squirrel being yanked from the forest..." Hiashi said with a deadpan.


"Not it." Hiashi says. Konan shrugs, and with a smile, encases the furious rodent in paper before tossing it back into the woods.

"... That was fucking retarded!" Naruto shouts. "What did I do wrong?"

"I have no idea. Again, I was more interested in the squirrel..."

"Yes, how did he manage to grab a target that small, and pull it at him, especially when he was intending for the exact opposite to happen...?" Konan muses.

"Hn. Flying squirrel." Hiashi muses with a smile, Before shaking his head abruptly "My apologies. I apparently really am in need of this vacation. I can see that I am of no use whatsoever. I shall take my leave. The hotsprings are calling me again..."

"No Byakugan, Hiashi!" Naruto shouts after him.

- An undeterminable amount of time later*-

"So, this is where we're going to meet with the other four kages? Eh. Konan-chan, you have your new headband on?"

"Yes, Naruto-kun."

"Can we move along? I blend in with the surroundings too well." Hiashi adds. "Also, I can't feel my toes..."

"Yeah, uhuh." Naruto says, waving his concerns off. "I wonder what the other kages are like...?"

"Hey, is that Naruto...?" A male voice says. "Hey, Gaara, look!"

"Huhn? Hey! It's make-up dude!" Naruto shouts back cheerfully. Kankuro face vaults into the snow.


"Yeah, yeah, whatever you wanna tell your boyfriend." Naruto quips back. "Hey, Gaara, and... What's your name again?"

"Temari, blondie. How can you keep forgetting my name?" Temari says with a smile, walking over to Naruto. She surprises everyone by wrapping him in a big hug, cracking his back audibly in the process.

"C-can't... Breathe...!" Naruto wheezes out. Temari smirks and lets him go, him landing in the snow.

"Naruto. It's good to see you." Gaara says. Naruto smiles cheekily, hoisting himself back up. "I heard that you were appointed Hokage through my spies, but I originally dismissed it as a rumor. I'm glad to be proven wrong."

"Heh. Thanks, Gaara."

"Yo, what happened to your eyes, squirt?" Kankuro asks, leaning in a bit awkwardly.

"Er... I'll explain that later. All I can say is that it has to do with my clan." He answers. "We gotta get in there... MY toes are starting to go numb."

"THANK you!" Hiashi shouts. Everyone looks at the man incredulously. "What?"

-The Kage's Summit-

"Alright. We will now begin the first ever Kage's Summit. Please take off your hats and state your name." A grizzled old Samurai with bandages on his head says. "Raikage-dono?"

"I am the Raikage, A."

"Mizukage, Mei Terumi."

"Kazekage, Gaara no Sabaku."

"Feh. Young brats. Oonoki of the Two Scales, Tsuchikage."

"And I'm Naruto Uzumaki, the Rokudaime Hokage, Dattebayo!"

"Hah, good to see some energy from young folks nowadays!" Oonoki says with a smirk. "But you seem a little young to be Hokage, along with the Kazekage. I'm wary of your lack of experience..."

"Tsuchikage-dono, please hold back your comments for now. As for the purpose of this summit, Raikage-dono, will you begin? You are the one that called for this meeting to begin with." A stood up loudly and slammed his hands into the table.

"I've called this summit because of a group of missing nin called Akatsuki. They are running about and capturing Jinchuuriki! Something must be done about them!" He said passionately. "I don't trust any of you though, especially with your connections to them!"

"That's absurd, you big oaf!" Oonoki shouts back.

"I have numerous reports of you using Akatsuki many times in the past, and there are members from every other village in the organization!" The Raikage shouts snarls back. "The greatest number of them being from Konoha! What do you have to say, Hokage?"

"That's true. However, there's a bigger problem than you realize." Naruto looked at Mifune. "May I?"

"Yes, please, Hokage-dono." Naruto stands up.

"Konoha was obliterated in the last month by who we thought was the leader of Akatsuki. There is little more than a crater left, but there were no casualties and we are in the process of rebuilding. I have with me an ex-member of Akatsuki. Konan, if you would?" At Naruto's declaration, A's hands grabbed his edge of the table and started cracking it.

"Keep your temper under control, Raikage-dono." Mifune ordered. A relented but still kept a scowl on his face.

"I am Konan, I was the right hand of the original leader of the original Akatsuki." There was more outrage at this, but not just from the Raikage this time. "Now I know you must want to kill me right now, but this is important. The Akatsuki that I was part of was completely different than the one that is terrorizing the Elemental Nations now."

"Get on with it, girl!" Oonoki growls.

"My apologies, Tsuchikage-sama. Our original leaders were Yahiko and Nagato Uzumaki, along with myself when we were trying to bring peace to Amegakure. Our creation was inspired by Jiraiya of the Sannin, who wished for nothing more than for the world to stop fighting and be in peace." Konan says sadly. "All that changed after the death of Yahiko, and Nagato killing Salamander Hanzo. We were approached by a masked man, he went by the name of Uchiha Madara..."

"Ooh, I love this part. Continue, please...!" A voice said from everywhere.


Madara Uchiha swirls into existence right on the table.

"Yep! Got it in one, Konan-chan!"


Read and review folks! Wait, why am I telling you to read it when this is clearly already at the bottom...? Eh. Review!

*- Undeterminable amount of time is referring to the fact that there really is no distance scale and speed scale in the Naruto-verse. The only real scale given is with Minato's Hiraishin, and that's only 'cuz it's instant. That's easy to scale: anywhere at any time.

Yatagarasu is a three legged crow from Shinto mythology that was the messenger for the gods. I figured, "hey, why not give the Sharingan another god-named ability?" and that was born. It IS a crow that Naruto gets shoved down his gullet though, so I went with that.