I'm sorry about the long delay between chapters. Remember, kiddies...if you don't know what a beeper is...you're too young for this story.

Songs are on my youtube, in the playlists.

Hey Lover by LL Cool J, You're Making Me High by Toni Braxton, Feenin' by Jodeci, I Wanna Come Over by Melissa Etheridge

Jasper's Bedroom - Summer after graduation - July 26, 1996

"I can't believe you're leaving tomorrow…"

He looked over at me and sighed, his pretty sad eyes looked like Afghani Kush…bright emerald green with little red streaks in them…it just made it that much sadder.

"I'm sorry, Jasper. My dad has had this planned since forever…he wants to take me down to Stanford early, introduce me around and show me the campus. It will be fine. I'll get a good education and then once I'm finished with school, I'll tell him to fuck off…only four more years at the very least…"

We were sitting on the floor with our backs against my bed, smoking a joint. Our knees were leant on each other and so were our heads. The little potted pot plant sat beside me. A gift from him to remember him by…even though it was surely gonna die in Massachusetts, it was just a seedling.

I sighed and exhaled as I handed him the joint, "I'm really sorry, Edward…"

He lifted his head and smiled at me, "It's okay. I'm really proud of you, Jasper…you're going to be living your dream…I'm so excited for you."

I griped and groaned at Edward for months about him making me apply for just about every scholarship I could get…and MIT. I just knew it was a complete waste of time…until I received a really thick envelope in the mail with an acceptance letter and full scholarship information from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.

I had never been more happy in my whole life. Unfortunately, Edward had only received an acceptance letter to Harvard but no scholarship, so even with all the money he saved from selling the sweet ganj…it wasn't enough.

This last year had been the best of my whole life. Edward was the most awesome person I had ever known.

He was gorgeous and sweet and funny and let's just say the boy had a tech nine in the bushes…he wasn't one of those dirt weed pinner joints where you gotta tear off half the paper cuz you don't have but a pinch of weed…no, he was one of them Jamaican bamboo leaf joints…

Long.

Thick.

Sticky.

Not icky.

Me like to licky.

Don't care where…I'm not picky…

"Jas? Are you rapping in your head again?"

I bust out into a fit of giggles cuz I'm high as fuck on my green girl but low as hell cuz my bronze boy is leavin…and how's that old sayin' go…laugh till you cry, er…cry and laugh later…no…laugh now, cry later…that's it…thank God, I hate when I can't remember somethin' and then that shit bothers me forever…like when ya got a song lyric or somethin' stuck in your head and you can't get it out cuz you can't find that shit on the radio…then three fuckin' long days later you finally hear it and realize you've been singin' the wrong damn lyrics the whole time…I hate that shit…

"What are you thinking now? You look annoyed."

I look up into his eyes and it's a big mistake cuz no matter how much I try and distract myself…I can't believe this is our last night together…possibly for forever…that fuckin' sucked big ass hairy donkey balls.

And his eyes are the prettiest thing I've ever seen…even prettier than the best 'dro.

And his lips are more intoxicating than inhaling the smoothest kahn.

And the way he made my whole body tingle was better than…anything.

I was really going to miss him.

And I think I might be in love with him.

I'm completely in love with his pot and it hurt like a son of a bitch to watch him donate the last of his plants to Peter and Charlotte.

I really, really loved his pot.

But it's also possible that I love him even more. Not that I would ever tell him that. Our relationship was wonderful but kind of strange. We were stoner buddies who ate pizza and chips while we watched Yo MTV Raps on the couch in my itty bitty trailer and he bitched about them takin' off Headbangers Ball. And I'd pull my shirt up over my head and do my best Beavis impression, "I am the great cornholio…I need tp for my bunghole…"

And he'd laugh.

We've also fooled around quite a bit. And by quite a bit I mean…dude, I was raised a stoned southern gentleman so I'll just say we were making up for lost time.

We hadn't gone all the way yet but we had done just about everything else. We didn't really talk about it though. I admit, I was a little scared. Edward had more experience than me cuz he had spent the summer before Freshman year at this music camp where him and some stupid little wiener named Riley fooled around. Luckily, for me, it had never gotten past hand jobs but still…it pissed me off!

But I let it go cuz…fuck Riley, I got a blow job! A lot of blow jobs! And one rim job! And it was fuckin' awesome! So fuck the stupid son of a…

"Quit thinking about Riley…you know it didn't mean anything."

I huffed and glared at him. He smiled at me.

I couldn't be mad at him…not tonight.

Cuz he was right, I did know that Riley didn't mean anything…but I wasn't sure if I meant anything and that's what bothered me.

But I hid it behind a smile, "Get outta my head, fucker."

He laughed but it wasn't real. I knew his real laughs.

Fuck, I was sad. I was super sad. I was so fuckin' sad that even the sweet sticky icky couldn't chase the blues away.

Cuz when Edward left, my super duper high was gonna be gone and I was gonna be stuck with being just normal high like the all damn common folk.

He sighed and reached his arm up and around my shoulder, pulling me into him. We both just sat there for awhile…not smoking, not talking, barely breathing.

Eventually he sighed and whispered, "I have to go home."

I wanted to bang my chest with my fists and scream, 'This…this is your home, boy!,' like one of those bad asses in Boyz in the Hood or Menace II Society…but I could never pull that shit off…I'm just a corn-fed white boy…

So, I squeezed my eyes shut for a second to gain some control. I would not cry.

I took a breath and sat up, pulling my knees to my chin and burying my face there, "Okay."

I felt him before he even ran his fingers through my curls, "Jas? Don't you want to kiss me good-bye?"

I lifted my head and glared as tears streamed down my face, "No! I don't wanna fuckin' kiss you good bye! I don't want you to go! Why can't you just stay? Just tell your dad to fuck off!"

Okay, so maybe I would cry…and throw an itty bitty bitch fest…

I knew the things I was sayin' were unfair but I couldn't help it. I'm not sure how it happened but over the last year, Edward Cullen had become the second most important thing in my life…

The first was my mama…not weed like ya'll were just thinking…

His face fell in pain and he croaked out, "That's not fair, Jasper! You're leaving in two weeks!"

And guilt washed through me in waves cuz the only time I had seen him cry was when he told me his parents were getting divorced as soon as he graduated…ya know, they at least wanted to stay together until he was 'grown.'

Helluva graduation gift, huh?

Bastards.

I grabbed him and pulled him to me, he was on his knees in between my legs. His arms wrapped around my back and mine wrapped around his shoulders, bringing him close enough for me to bury my face in his neck and breathe him in.

I whispered, "I'm sorry, Edward…I'm not mad at you…this is just…fucked up…"

He nodded against my shoulder and whispered back, "I know…you'll be okay, Jasper. Once you get settled into school, you'll make friends and start a whole new life…"

I squeezed him tighter and shook my head, "I don't wanna new life…I want you."

He lifted his face and looked into mine, those crazy hemp eyes glistening, "You're the most incredible person I have ever known, Jas. And you're going to do great things at MIT. And eventually, you'll move on and find someone who's worthy of everything you have to give…well, you'll never find anyone worthy enough because you're amazing…"

Then he started bowing like Wayne and Garth saying, "I'm not worthy! I'm not worthy!"

I started laughing and he chuckled as he stood up. He held out his hand and I took it as he pulled me up. He was actually the same height as me now.

Our arms wrapped around each other and he leaned in and kissed me softly, knowing that mama was home and we couldn't get too worked up…kissing almost always led to other stuff.

Then he squeezed his eyes shut and whispered, "I'll come see you and Lucy before I leave tomorrow."

He pulled away and took all the heat and high with him as he turned and took a step towards the door.

I couldn't watch him leave without telling him how I felt…my mouth just reacted as I yelled, "Wait!"

He turned back around and pulled his glasses off, wiping at his eyes.

Just say it, man…I love you…it's not that hard…you wrote a whole damn rap about why you love to smoke herb…just say I love you…

"I…um…uh…"

Shit, I'm blowing it! Damn, it! I wish I could hit a reset button!

I huffed and looked down. My favorite pipe was lying there on my bed. It was my first one. I made it in my Woodshop class during free time and I painted it bright green in art class. And then I very carefully wrote two of my favorite quotes on it using calligraphy stencils.

One side read, "None but ourselves can free our minds - Bob Marley"

And the other side read, "Life's a bitch and then you die so fuck the world…let's get high."

I sighed as I reached down and grabbed it. I walked over to where Edward stood, wiping off his glasses on his Nine Inch Nails t-shirt.

I handed it to him and let out a breath, "I want you to take this, Edward…and every time you toke up…think of me."

He snorted as he giggled and ran his fingers over the smooth sides and whispered, "None but ourselves can free our minds…"

Then he smiled a real beautiful crooked grin before throwing his arms around me and pulling me close as he whispered, "I'm going to miss you so much, Jas."

I held him just as tight and breathed him in…one last time, "I'm gonna miss you too, Ed. Like crazy."

And then he pulled away and crashed his lips to mine, engulfing me in the heat of his mouth and the sweet taste of his tongue. And just like that, I was fuckin' toasted.

I moaned and gripped his hair tight between my fingers, holding him hard so he wouldn't go.

His fingers were wrapped in my curls and he groaned as he pushed me backwards until I fell on my stupid twin sized bed, bringing him crashing down on top of me.

He accidentally kneed me a little but I was a man about it cuz the feeling of his body on mine was always just too much…

Best. Fuckin. High. Ever.

He rolled his hips into mine and I grabbed his ass as I shoved my hips back up into his…

"Oh my! Um…maybe you boys should shut the door…"

We both gasped as we broke the kiss and looked over at my mama's wide eyes and pink cheeks.

I mumbled as my cheeks began to burn, "Uh…hi mama…Edward's here…"

She smirked, "Yes, I know that, darlin. His car's parked out front. And your hands are still on his ass."

Yes…yes, they are.

We both quickly jumped up and tried to right ourselves, both grabbing a pillow and situating it across our laps.

Mama just had no sense about teenage boy awkwardness as she strode across the room and grabbed Edward's cheeks, leaning down to kiss it and then tousle his hair, "You're gonna come see us tomorrow 'fore ya leave, right baby?"

He blushed even harder and nodded as he smiled, "Yeah, of course, Lucy."

She smiled and turned but as she got to the door she turned around and squinted up her nose, "It smells just plain weird in here. I know you're a teenage boy, son, but can you pick up the dirty clothes or somethin'…take out the trash…open a window or somethin'…whew…"

And then she finally left.

I let out a breath and he sighed, "I really do have to go."

I nodded and there was that heart crushing ache again, "I'll walk you to the door."

I followed him the twenty steps or so it took him to get to the front door. He looked up at me and smiled weakly, "Bye Jasper."

I tried to smile back, "Bye Edward."

He opened the door and hung his head down, pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes.

I put my hand on his shoulder and whispered, "Ed…"

Then he turned and kissed me again, hard and desperate. I returned it until my lungs were aching from lack of air.

He broke the kiss and we both stood there just panting.

Then he leaned in and pecked my lips one more time before whispering, "I love you, Jas."

Before I could even open my eyes, he was half way in his car and pulling down the road.

I was in shock. I focused on just breathing.

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

In.

"Baby boy…you okay?"

And then I breathed out, really loudly, "No I'm not okay! This sucks! Everything's changing and I'm probably gonna see him for, like, two seconds tomorrow and then I'll probably never see him again! He just told me he loved me, mama, and he's gonna be in California and I'm gonna be in Massachusetts and we already decided that it would be too hard to try and have a long distance relationship since he ain't even comin' out of the closet but that was before he said the 'L' word! Why the hell did I waste three damn years being scared to talk to him? Now he's leavin' and…"

I started crying now, "…I'm really, really sad, mama…I love him too…"

She pulled me into her arms and we both flung down on the couch. She ran her fingers through my curls and it always helped to calm me down.

She whispered, "I know it hurts, baby…your first heart break always hurts like hell…but you're gonna be okay, son. It's gonna take time but no matter what happens between you and Edward, you're gonna be fine cuz you're so smart and so strong and so wonderful. But you go ahead and cry, baby…let some of that hurt out while mama's here to soak it up…"

And so I cried hard for a few minutes before finally calming down to just sniffles.

"Son? I know that everything's changin' and sometimes changin' is scary as hell but it can be freeing too, baby. We all gotta go through things and face our fears and take the world head on sometimes…cuz the world is always changin' around us…you just gotta make sure that it doesn't change who you are. With your loving heart, and your brilliant mind, and your dashin' good looks…you're gonna do just fine, baby."

I looked up at her and rolled my eyes, "I look like Farmer Ted, mama."

She furrowed her brows, "Who's he? He must be cute as a button…"

I smiled, "Edward thinks he is."

She smiled back, "Well, Edward's one smart boy…I'm still rootin' for him, ya know…I'm still hopin' that he gets his happy ending."

I sighed and looked down, "Yeah, mama…me too."

I excused myself to go lay down and mope.

I took a few hits from my blunt roach and closed my eyes. My thoughts drifted back to those first couple weeks after I asked him to be mine.

Those first couple of days were awesome. We spent the rest of the weekend hanging out and getting to know each other better…and kissing…a lot of kissing.

He was a fantastic kisser. He always tasted so good and his lips were so strong but so soft. I loved kissing him.

And we talked about how we were gonna handle school. Neither one of us was ready to come out to all those ass clowns at school but we decided that we were just gonna be friends while within those walls.

So, when I saw him, I'd say, "Hey, Ed."

He'd smile and nod, "Hey, Jas."

And it was so cool.

Then at lunch, I walked in and he was sitting at a table by himself. He looked up and smiled so I went over and sat down across from him. I whispered, "Um…is this okay?"

He smiled nervously, "It's fine…we're allowed to be friends, right?"

I nodded and looked down at the table as I saw Mike and the Mighty Prepeteers walk up.

"Cullen? Why the hell are you sitting with trailer boy?"

I frowned and glared…at the table, ready to grab my stupid tray and move outside.

Edward reached over and grabbed my tray so I couldn't pick it up, "No, wait, Jas."

Then he furrowed his brows up at Newton, "Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds."

I smiled as he quoted Einstein and Newton looked annoyed and confused. Then he shrugged, "Whatever, dude. So, big party at your house Friday night…"

Edward shook his head, "No."

Now Newton looked really confused, "What?"

Edward stood up and towered over Newton now, "I said no. Find somewhere else to hang out. I'm sick of you guys using my place to binge drink and party just because of the lack of parental supervision. We're not even really friends."

Newton rolled his eyes, "No shit, I only hung with you cause my mom made be nice to 'the weird Cullen kid,'. You're on your own, dude. Fucking geek…"

Then he and his cronies walked off.

Edward was now looking down at the table with red cheeks and that shit just wasn't right.

So I nudged him with my foot under the table and he looked up at me. I smiled, "Geeks are gonna rule the world one day. Ed."

He laughed now and nodded, "And when we do, we're going to come back here and rub that shit in Newton's ugly face, deal?"

He held out his fist for me to bump and I did as I laughed, "Deal."

We started eating and talking about shit we wanted to do over the summer. My last class of the day was Advanced Chemistry and I was acing that shit so the teacher let me out early to do some research in the library on my own.

So I went outside behind the dumpster and blazed.

I was off in my own little daydream about Edward and me in a field of pot, singing like that chick from The Sound of Music…"The hills are alive with the smell of reefer…"

"Yo, J-Dawg! I smell it, let me inhale it, man."

I opened my eyes and glared at Felix, then I did my best Smokey impression, "You didn't put in on this, man."

He looked shocked as he reached for the joint, "What?"

I rolled my eyes, "If you want a joint, I'll sell you one but you ain't smokin' for free no more. The only time you even talk to me is when you wanna smoke up all my shit. That ain't happening no more."

He turned and waved his hand dismissively, "Whatever…you're sister's leaving soon anyway…I ain't go no reason to put up with your geeky ass anymore if you're gonna be all selfish and shit."

He walked away and I smiled as I took another toke and mumbled, "See…the weed be letting ya know…evil lurks."

After that, our old "friends" pretty much left us alone except for the occasional taunting which we would just ignore. It didn't matter if we fit in with them anymore…we fit with each other and turns out, that was all we needed.

Summer started a few days later and surprisingly, Edward liked to stay at my house way more than his, even though his house was usually empty. We'd hang out in my room, smoking and listening to music…or chillin' and watching TV…or pretending to watch TV…

The first time we touched each other was on my couch. Mama was in bed but said Edward could stay over if he wanted as long as one of us slept on the couch.

So, we were sitting on opposite ends of it, watching Tales from the Crypt. The tension was killing me cuz I had barely gotten to kiss him all day with Rose and mama around. I was leaning against the armrest, twirling my curls around my fingers as I chewed on my lip.

He was leaning against the other end, playing with the frayed bottom of his shirt like it was the most interesting thing in the world.

"Um…want some popcorn or somethin'?"

He looked up and nodded, "Uh, sure."

I got up to go make some microwave popcorn and I saw Edward shift uncomfortably in his seat as I walked by him.

I smiled, "You can go get a t-shirt and some shorts or somethin' to sleep in, if ya wanna stay."

He blushed but his lips curled up into that fuckawesome crooked grin, "Yeah, I think I will."

I put the popcorn in and walked past him, looking over my shoulder, making sure a few curls fell into my eyes and smiled, "Come on, Ed…you can change in my room."

That's right, Ed…I know you like these dirty blonde curls…I knew he liked them cuz he had a major crush on Joe McIntyre from New Kids on the Block. I found a copy of The Big Bopper magazine in his nightstand drawer when I was looking for a rolling paper. The pages of a Joey Joe centerfold were stuck together. Man, I loved to tease him about that shit. As long as he didn't discover my obsession with John Cusack then things would be all good.

He jumped up and nearly fell over his own feet. When we got to my room, I dug him out a white t-shirt and a pair of dark green basketball shorts. That shit would make his eyes pop.

Fuck…I'm turning into a girl more and more every damn day…

I grabbed me some shorts and a t-shirt and went to the bathroom to change. Then I went back into the kitchen and grabbed the popcorn, salting the hell out of it before pouring it in a bowl. I grabbed a couple of grape Faygo's and sat it down on the coffee table.

A few minutes later, he walked into the living room and fuck me if he didn't look damn good wearing my clothes.

He sat down and was still blushing. I couldn't keep my eyes off his calves. Call me crazy but those little bronze hairs on his legs were doing strange things to me. I saw him shudder and then he got goose bumps.

I reached up behind us and grabbed the quilt off the back of the couch, "You cold, Ed?"

He nodded and smiled shyly, "Uh, yeah…thanks."

I guess it would be different being in air conditioning as opposed to central air. It does get a little cold in here sometimes.

He pulled the quilt over his lap and I swear I saw the quilt move as he adjusted himself underneath it.

That made me break out in goose bumps. He smiled over at me and held up the other end, "Want some?"

Fuck yeah I want some…I wanted some so bad I felt like breaking out into Van Halen's "Everybody Wants Some,"…and then that started the whole claymation hamburger sequence from Better Off Dead…one of my favorite John Cusack movies…

I scooted over a little and slipped underneath the blanket with him. All of a sudden, I was very overheated but I sure as fuck wasn't taking the blanket off.

His calf brushed mine…and then his thigh…and then he was sitting right next to me. But when his bare foot brushed across mine, I had to bite my lip to stifle a moan.

He just sat there, looking all innocent and shit…the fucker.

I was tenting the quilt now so I grabbed the popcorn bowl and sat it on my lap. I laid my head back on the couch and turned my face to look at him through a few loose curls, my eyes half lidded from being stoned and being near him, "Want some?"

His eyes turned to mine and they were dark, like that Mexican brick weed I brought off Maria last year, as they watched me over top his dark framed fuck hot glasses.

And then he smiled and whispered, "Yes. Are you going to give me some, Jas?"

Fuck I loved it when he…did anything…I just fuckin' loved it all.

My heart was racing and my whole face was on fire as I mumbled, "Um…uh…"

That was about it.

He started laughing and grabbed a handful of popcorn, "I win."

The fuckin' nerve! Get me all worked up that I stutter and shit…fuckin' asshole.

I glared at the Cryptkeeper as he cackled, "I wouldn't want to lose my head!" And then his head falls off and rolls until he starts cackling again.

I chuckled a little but only cuz that shit's funny when you're blazed.

Then I glared again.

Edward started giggling, "You're so cute when you glare angrily at things."

I changed from a glare to a scowl and directed it at him, "This isn't a game, fucker."

He rolled his eyes and chuckled again before leaning over and whispering right in my ear…knowing that shit was making me hornier than a 17 year old boy who's never had his dick touched by anything but his own hand…oh wait, there's nothing hornier than that.

"I've always thought of sex in the traditional form of baseball…"

His hand came over and removed the popcorn from our laps, placing it on the coffee table. Then it slid underneath the blanket and started rubbing my thigh. His other hand slid into the hair at the back of neck, tugging and wrapping his fingers in curls.

My eyes closed as he leaned in and whispered again, "You see, first base is kissing and touching above the clothes…second is skin on skin…third is sucking and licking…so you see, Jas…I want to win this game…I want to come sliding into home…"

Holy shit…I can't believe I just found a baseball metaphor to be the sexiest thing I have ever heard.

It even replaced when he told me about his weed closet and said I could have as much as I wanted.

It was that sexy.

I groaned as his hand hovered dangerously close to the massive woody I was sporting through my basketball shorts.

My eyes opened as his hand finally wrap softly around my dick through the fabric and squeezed it gently from base to tip.

I won't lie…I was ready to dedicate Jodeci's, "Feenin'", to the boy cuz when it came to Edward, I was a fuckin' fiend and couldn't get enough.

His eyes were trained on my mouth as I moaned, "Oh fuck, Edward…"

My fingers clenched the cushions underneath me as my body automatically jutted up into his hand, needing more.

His breath was coming out in shallow pants as he watched how good his touch made me feel. My head was lying back against the couch with my eyes squeezed shut and my mouth hung open unashamedly grunting and moaning and gasping for air as his hand tightened and continued it's divine torture of stroking me softly through two fuckin' layers of material.

Fuck I wanted him to steal second base…

Both of his hands worked me into a euphoric state of bliss…a utopia of pleasure, if you will. We could start a utopian society consisting of just him and me…lying naked in a meadow of wildflowers and marijuana…and the dilly bars would never melt, not even in the warm sun that would shine down on his glistening porcelian body, shimmering with sweat from fuckin' me…I mean, me fuckin' him…utopia…ut-to-pi-a…that doesn't even sound like a real word…I dub thee, Edtopia…

His fingers were wrapped in my hair and wrapped around my cock and that shit was making me feel more stoned than I had ever felt in my entire life. And I knew I needed to touch him cuz from the way his breaths were sounding in my ear, he needed me to touch him.

And I would.

In just a minute…

I selfishly let him stroke me for awhile, just enjoying this new euphoric state.

But when I opened my eyes and saw him looking at me through those pretty hydro eyes, dazed with desire…I reached over and wrapped my fingers around his swollen dick through his shorts.

He groaned as his head fell to my shoulder, "Oh thank God…"

Then he lifted his face and smiled while he blushed. I couldn't help but smile back.

He lifted his lips to mine and the little tortured spark that had been being fucked with all night between us…erupted into a thick heavy cloud of lust and desire that encircled us and pushed us on.

My other hand slid behind his back and gripped his t-shirt, pulling him closer while my body pushed towards his impatiently.

He pulled his lips from mine and they attached to my neck as he started biting and sucking the skin there that had gone way too long without being touched.

"Fuck, Jas…you're driving me crazy…"

He panted against my neck and I swallowed the loud moan that wanted to surface from the thought that I was driving him crazy too.

But there was no swallowing that fuckin' moan when his fingers slid underneath the waistband of my shorts and boxers, wrapping around my cock. The whole head was already wet with pre-cum and when his palm swirled around it and began coating my cock…it was like taking a hit of acid…or so I've heard.

Colors exploded behind my eyelids and the whole room was floating but his hand on my cock kept me grounded to the couch.

It was hot underneath that blanket and I was sweating, my curls sticking to the nape of my neck and cheeks.

His head was lying back now, eyes closed and mouth open as he moaned my name softly into the thick, night time air.

He really was so beautiful.

My fingers moved on their own until they were pushing their way down tight abs and short soft curls, finally wrapping around his heavy cock that was just as wet as mine.

I had never touched a cock before…I mean, other than my own. And no one had ever touched mine. Sometimes, I would use my right hand to jerk off cuz I'm normally a lefty and it would almost feel like someone other than me was touching my dick.

This was so much better.

And his cock felt so good in my hand. I couldn't see it since we were underneath the quilt so I took the opportunity to explore it with my sense of touch. I felt the thick vein on the underside…the smooth ridge around the plump head…the soft skin that would glide up and down as I pumped him in my hand.

His cock was long…I'm guessing around nine inches like my own. I figured that must be average since I hadn't seen any other penises in my lifetime. I mean, it's not like two super geeks like us would have abnormally large penises that 98% of the worlds male population would kill for.

We were both a little frantic now as we moved into each other's hands and continued stroking one another's cocks.

He leaned forward and rested his head on my shoulder. He was sweating too, I could feel the sweat tinged ends of his hair brushing against my extremely sensitive skin.

His rugged breath against my neck was too much and I whisper moaned, so mama wouldn't wake up, "Oh God…Oh God…Oh Ed…Ed…gonna…gonna…oh God…"

And the walls reverberated with my soft cries as all the colors melted and saturated every inch of my vision…my toes curling into the carpet as I came in long, thick pulses all over his hand and in my shorts.

My eyes opened just in time to see his head thrown back, eyes closed and that beautiful crooked grin replaced by an equally beautiful 'O'.

His cock throbbed in my hand before I felt warm, gooey liquid coming out in waves as he pushed up into my fist.

Once we came down off our super high, we wiped ourselves off with the blanket and went to take showers…separately of course. Not that I wasn't rooting for sharing a shower but I figured we were lucky we didn't get caught by mama so we shouldn't push it…tonight anyway.

And that was the first time Edward touched my cock.

I snapped outta my daydream when mama knocked on the door.

I managed a raspy, "Come in, mama."

She walked and smiled, "Want the other half of this cherry popsicle?"

Twin pops were a necessary staple in this house at summertime for me and mama. We always split them.

Never the one to turn down a delicious frozen treat, I nod and sit up on my bed. She throws the wrapped half to me and I catch it, "Thanks, mama."

She nods and shuts the door as she leaves. And I'm alone with my cherry popsicle. I peel the paper back and throw it in my trash can. Then I take it between my lips and close my eyes. The next thing I know, I'm sitting with my back against the wall and jacking off while relishing the cold sticky flavor on my tongue…and all my thoughts are on when I saw him eat a cherry popsicle.

It had only been a couple weeks after me and Edward had been holding it steady at second base. We were at my house on a Wednesday afternoon, mama was at work and Rose was in Seattle shopping with a girlfriend.

Me and Edward had the house all to ourselves.

It was an unusually hot day, even for summer in Forks. We were sitting on the couch, blazing from my pipe when Edward looked over at me through red, glazed over eyes, "My throat is so dry…"

I rolled my eyes, "Dude? You know where the fridge is."

He smirked and huffed dramatically as he got up and walked to the kitchen.

"Hey, can I have cherry popsicle?"

I shrugged, "Sure, man…whatever."

I heard a sound that made my cock perk up at attention.

I looked over into the kitchen and saw Edward leaning against the counter, eyes closed and sucking that cherry popsicle half way down his throat.

I don't remember walking to the kitchen but suddenly I was there, standing in front of him.

He seemed completely oblivious to me standing there, watching him perform felatio on that god damn popsicle when it should've been my dick.

His lips were bright red and his scarlet tongue would snake out and lick the dripping sweetness along the ridge of that lucky fuckin' popsicle.

Finally, his eyes opened lazily and he smiled as he slurped the red drops and then ran his tongue along his bottom lip with a satisfied smile.

I stood there, frozen…unable to get the vision of him slurping the nut off my cock like he did that popsicle, outta my head.

He brushed the cold tip across my bottom lip and smiled, "Want a lick, Jas?"

Did I mention yet that Edward is fuckin' awesome?

Just in case I didn't…Edward is fuckin' awesome!

He parted my lips and I looked into his eyes, watching them grow heavy as I sucked the tip into my mouth and swirled my tongue around it.

He grinned that crooked little grin that usually meant he was up to something, before leaning forward and running his tongue along the length of the popsicle while I sucked on the tip.

Moments later, the popsicle was in the trash and he was on his knees as I leaned against the counter, gripping the edges until my knuckles were white.

He looked up at me with bright green eyes and cherry lips while he slowly undid my jeans. I was already feeling completely twisted, stoned again on Edward Cullen.

When my jeans were opened, he tugged them down until they pooled at my feet. I was left in tie dye boxers with stoned happy faces all over them.

He smiled up at me and chuckled a little before sliding them down too.

My cock sprang forth, weeping with joy.

And then the whole world tilted on its axis as those cherry lips wrapped around the tip…that scarlet tongue, cold and wet against the heated skin of my pulsing cock.

He sucked more and more down his throat, swirling his tongue all around the head and along the ridge.

I fought the urge to buck forward, my dick anxious for more of that heavenly mouth.

His hand wrapped around the base, covering what he couldn't take down in throat as he began working them both together. My hand wrapped into his hair and I just ran my fingers through his crazy bronze locks while I watched my cock disappear between those smooth cherry lips.

Edward's hands on my cock was fuckin' awesome.

Edward's mouth on my cock was fuckin' phenomenal.

I could feel my toes curling and my eyes starting to roll as I rasped out a warning, "Gonna…cum…"

He kept his lips wrapped around the head and I could feel him sucking as my whole body trembled while I came down his throat.

I was off in Edtopia again when I felt him tuck me back in and redo my jeans. Then he grabbed my biceps and pull himself up to his feet.

He smiled and blushed…the cute fucker he is…

"Did it feel good?"

I sucked in a big breath and grinned, "Edward, everything you do feels good. Almost too good. You make me feel things that even drugs can't make me feel…not that I do drugs…I just smoke pot."

He laughed and pulled me into a hug…he liked hugging.

I could feel his erection pulsing against my thigh and I couldn't leave my boy hangin' like that…well, not hangin'…but…whatever…

I reached down and palmed him through his jeans, he bucked into my hand and I smiled as took the lobe of his ear between my teeth and whispered, "Wanna go to my bedroom?"

He shuddered and nodded with a breathless, "Please, Jas…"

I grabbed his hand and all but yanked him down the hallway…the need for more of him…the perfect drug.

The second my door was shut, we were fused together at the mouth as hands began ripping off clothes as we stripped our way to the bed.

We fell together, bare chested and jeans and boxers around our knees.

My cock was rising again as he rubbed his hard dick shamelessly against mine.

I had landed on top of him and his hands were on my ass, thrusting up and pulling me harder into him. I groaned into his mouth and dug my toes into the bed as I pushed back against him.

We couldn't even get our jeans all the way off before we were both coming all over each others stomachs and cocks.

We lay there for a minute, breathless and weak…finally I lift my head and smile, "How bout we take a smoke break…then I think I'm gonna try and go for third?"

He laughed, "Third base is awesome…"

I sigh as I look at the empty popsicle stick and the messy streaks of my own cum that cover my belly…

I'm pathetic…empty…just like this stupid popsicle stick.

I drag myself outta my bedroom and to the shower so I can wash my shame down the drain.

I can't fight the intense feeling to just see him alone again…just one more time.

Just touch him one more time.

One more kiss.

One last fix.

And I wanna tell him I love him too.

As I get outta the shower, I wrap a towel around myself and grab the phone, praying that he picks up cuz his parents really don't like me.

"Cullen residence. Dr. Cullen speaking."

I groan internally and then clear my throat, trying to sound like an upstanding individual, "Hello, Mr. Cullen. May I speak with Edward, please?"

He huffed and I swear I could hear him roll his eyes, "Edward has to get up early in the morning, Jasper. We're leaving for California tomorrow. I heard that you got a scholarship to MIT. That's fantastic…it's so nice to see Ivy League schools reach out to the underprivileged."

And there it was. He considered me trash. I overheard him tell Edward once that Newton was the kind of friend he should have because that boy was going somewhere…he said that in five years, I'd be pumping his gas.

Hey God, I know we don't talk much but if you could make me filthy stinkin rich so I can come back here and rub Dr. Cullen and Newton's faces in it…that would be awesome.

I tried to keep my cool but I was grinding my teeth, "Don't worry sir…there are plenty of gas stations in Massachusetts for me to work at when they realize I'm just a poor, dumb redneck. Tell Edward I called."

I hung up before he could insult me again. My soul was hurting enough without adding insult to injury.

I sighed and threw on a pair of sweats before laying back down in bed again.

A knock interrupted my staring at the ceiling dejectedly…

"Come in, mama."

My door opened and mama had a small overnight bag on her shoulder, "Hey baby. I just got off the phone with Charlie and I'm gonna stay over there tonight since I don't have to work in the morning. You'll be okay on your own for the night, right?"

Oh yeah, did I forget to mention that about the time I started dating Edward…my mama started dating Charlie Swan.

Yeah.

That's right.

Chief Swan.

He did actually seem like a decent guy…I mean, when he got called to the Dairy Queen that night after I closed up early cuz Aro was worried and called the cops about the 'bomb' threat…he just laughed about it to my mama when Aro wanted me to get in trouble for it.

The fucker fired me…wasn't that enough.

Although Edward did quit as soon as he found out and then Aro was left on his own until he hired new people.

Karma's a mother fuckin' bitch.

But I was a little upset that mama would leave me in my hour of need, "Mama? Do you really think it's a good idea for you to spend the night with this guy? You barely know him…"

She rolled her eyes and laughed, "I've known him for over ten years and he's the town Sheriff…I think I'm safe."

I didn't like it.

"But mama…you don't want him to, like…try and take advantage of you…"

She walked into my room with her hands on her hips…just like Rose. Thank God she was at USC.

"Son? I think you're missin' the bigger picture here…you're gonna have the whole place to yourself for the whole night…"

I furrowed my brows and pouted, "I know! I'll be all alone while you're off gallivanting around town with Chief Swan!"

She sat down next to me on my bed and grabbed my cheeks, squeezing them tightly until my lips puckered up and I couldn't talk.

"Son? Will you please stop thinkin' about my sex life and think about your own?"

I shuddered…mama's should never say the word 'sex'…it made it sound so dirty and…

Wait? She's leaving for the whole night? I'm gonna have the house to myself all night? I gotta go get Edward!

I finally started nodding so she'd let go of the death lock she had on my cheeks. I scrambled to find the jeans that he liked so much and always said they made my ass look so good he wanted to bite it.

She picked up her bag and smiled, "Be safe, baby. I love you and I'll be here at 10am."

I nodded as I pulled my jeans up, "Okay, mama…wait? Are you taking the truck?"

Just then I heard a honk and she smirked, "The keys are on the hook in the kitchen. Be careful. Good night, baby. Love you."

"Night, mama. Love you too."

I grabbed the condom that I had taken from health class and shoved it in my pocket.

She took off and moments later, I was on the road.

My hands were shaking as I pulled on his street and over to the curb.

I would let Edward get a homerun tonight if he would just come home with me.

I turned off the engine and sat there for a minute, gathering my courage.

Then I pulled out a joint and toked up on some smoked courage and a few minutes later, I was leaning against the tree that led to his bedroom.

His light was on and I could see his shadow moving across the room.

But I had to climb that tree.

I closed my eyes and did some relaxation exercises I saw on the Ricki Lake show.

Eye of the tiger…face your fear…come on…this is the last chance you're ever gonna get to be with him…

That got me moving as I grabbed onto the lowest branch and started shimmying up. His light went off and I cursed the snail like rate at which I was moving along the branches.

But this shit was high…and not the good kind of high.

I gripped tighter and scooted along.

I damn near fell when I heard a door open. My eyes snapped down as I saw Edward stepping out of the back patio door.

He started creeping around the side and I managed to whisper scream, "Ed!"

His face shot up to mine and I saw a mixture of amusement, curiosity…and love in his eyes, "Jas? What are you doing?"

I swear I thought I heard the branch creak and begin to buckle underneath me. I wrapped my body around it tightly and squeezed my eyes shut, "Looking death in the face and laughing…what are you doing?"

He chuckled and started climbing the tree like it was second nature, prying my fingers from the branches again and slowly helping me down.

Once we reached the ground, I crouched and took a few deep breaths. When I stood back up, he grabbed my hand and led me around to the front of the garage as he whispered, "What are you doing here?"

I took one more breath and looked into his gorgeous hemp eyes, "I just…wanted to say…I love you, too, Ed."

He smiled and I pulled him into a hug. He sighed against my shoulder and whispered, "Thanks for coming."

I held him close and whispered, "Where were you going?"

He sighed and looked up at me through his glasses, "I was coming to see you. I overheard my dad on the phone with you…I'm so sorry…"

I put my finger to his lips, "Shush now, darlin…it's not your fault your dad's a stuck up prick."

He sighed and kissed my fingertip before flicking his tongue out and whispering, "I wish we had more time…"

I stifled a moan and looked him in the eyes, "Um, Edward? Mama's gone tonight…for the whole night and um…if you wanted to stay over…I mean, I know your dad would never approve but…"

His eyes lit up as he grabbed my hand, pulling me towards the street, "Fuck my dad…we'll have the whole house alone? Really?"

I nodded and he smiled as he saw mama's truck parked down at the end of the street.

"Come on…I have to give up the next few years of my life for my father…tonight is ours. I'll deal with him tomorrow."

We laughed like two giddy teenagers as we hopped in the truck and headed back to my place.

When we got there, I parked the truck and turned to him. I had the condom in the palm of my hand as I grabbed his and looked down at the seat, "Um, Ed? I want…uh…"

His fingers wrapped around the package and I heard him take a sharp breath.

I could feel my face burning as I looked up at him, "I want you. You're my first kiss…my first boyfriend…my first love…I want you to be my first everything…"

And my last.

He studied the shiny foil package in his hand, "But, Jas…I'm leaving tomorrow…are you sure you want to give this to me?"

I nodded as my chest ached, "I'm sure."

I love you.

He smiled with red cheeks, "I love you."

Freaky mind reading shit again…

I was nervous about offering my ass up on a silver platter but this was Edward Cullen we're talking about.

Ed.

My best friend.

My lover.

My partner in crime.

With a nine inch cock.

Fuck, I'm gonna need to get high…

I smiled as he pulled out a big fat blunt, "We're probably going to need this."

And that's just one of the reasons why I loved this boy…

A/N - Okay, so this chapter just got away from me and I have to split it up. So one…maybe two more chapters for this story. Hope you guys enjoyed!