Dr. Spencer Reid
Reid: Did you know that the number of barnyard fowl killed while crossing major roadways has increased by fifteen percent in the last two years? Much of this is due to the misguided attempts by local schoolchildren to free chickens kept in insanitary conditions on corporate chicken farms. The chickens try to flee, they're overfed and can't fly, and they get hit on the road. It's tragic.
He notices everyone staring at him.