Alright, as you already know, this is a continuation of "Bleach at Youkai Academy", but this follows Ichigo's adventures at home, obviously, or not so obviously, I've been known to be pretty inattentive to the obvious. It's going under comedy/general because it's not always going to be funny, though I will try. It's just to account for the lulls in the story, like when nothing really important/funny is going on.
Anyways, let's just hope that my comedy is up to par with you guysz' expectations! Oh, I might end up making some references to video games and/or videos. If you don't think you'll like it, just write 'N' at the bottom of your review or 'Y' if you will like it. I don't feel like putting up a poll…heh…
SO IN ESSENCE! This is going to be an introductory chapter to see how ya'll react. It's gonna be short, but the rest of the chapters are going to be over 9k words, rest assured!
Alright, I totally forgot about mention how Ichigo actually got back to Karakura. Thanks for the people who noticed like Okami Princess and others, you guys are the ones that make this story work out that much better... unless I totally wipe out on something, then that's just me spacing out.
REVISED VERSION, THIS CHAPTER IS!
He was actually back, he couldn't believe it. All those months at the Academy had past by so quickly, yet, so slowly at the same time. It was a good thing he didn't need to ride the train like a normal person since he was still in his Shinigami form. Though... he technically was riding it since he was on top. He had to get to Hat'n clogs first in order to get back his body.
He frowned, he just hoped he hadn't done anything weird to it.
The quaint little shack stood before him, seemingly broken and out of business. He smirked, just like always. He entered the store. Upon entering he was immediately greeted with the grinning visage of the owner of the store, his cane propped in front of him like always. Then out of nowhere applause was heard, making Ichigo flinch as he turned every which way to find the source.
"Yo Ichigo, it's been a while hasn't it?" The store owner, Urahara Kisuke, grinned as he tipped his hat forward, casting those mysterious shadows over his eyes.
"I was kind of hoping you'd change." Ichigo said off-offhandedly, giving up on his search, "Guess not."
Kisuke didn't seem at all bothered, and instead ushered Ichigo further back into the store. "I have your body ready. It's in perfect stasis so rest assured, nothing has happened to it."
Ichigo didn't bother to say anything, and instead looked appalled that his body had been stored inside a closet. A rather high-tech closet, but a closet nonetheless. Ichigo's head turned towards the grinning Kisuke as he pointed to his physical body. "What if someone had seen this?"
Kisuke simply offered a mysterious grin that left Ichigo wanting to pull out his hair.
"Whatever." Ichigo waited for the field to dissipate before he leapt into his body. It was always a strange sensation, and since he hadn't done it in a while, it jarred him a little. Yet, despite losing all that power because the physical body limited him, he felt good.
"Oh, by the way. I made you a little something." Ichigo blinked as he was handed another badge. He eyed it curiously.
"How did you know?" Ichigo asked.
"Let's just say I have more friends than you think I do." Kisuke replied as he saw Ichigo's eyes go wide with shock.
"You have friends?" Kisuke nearly dropped his cane. That hadn't been the response he was going for. Ichigo merely shrugged at the stupefied look of the store owner before saying, "Thanks anyway Hat'n Clogs. I have to get home now."
"Take care." Kisuke replied after recovering his composure. Then Ichigo left.
Ichigo breathed in the air of his home town, glad to be here after being away for so long. He was alone, but had anyone been around, they would've seen a small smile on his face.
He was home. That was all that mattered at the moment as he walked down the alleyway. Everything was exactly the same, though; he supposed it would be since he had only been gone a few months. Even the trash bags on the side of the road were there, like always. He gave it a brief thought before dismissing it. Not of real importance anyways.
His footsteps sounded in the quiet afternoon. This part of town was always quiet. He rarely saw people on the street. A few more steps took him around a turn and his home was right ahead.
Something was off.
"Falcon PU—" There it was! Ichigo reacted before the attack could finish and countered with his own.
"KICK!" He said, sending the goat-bearded man into the cement bouncing.
"Hm, I see your skills have not dulled Ichigo!" Said bearded man rose up, seemingly unaffected by the kick save for the footprint on the side of the face.
"I'm gone for how long and this is how you greet me?" Ichigo tried sounding mad, but it ended up coming out more exasperated than anything else.
"You're my nemesis! I have to make sure you're at your very best!" Ishhin countered, teeth shining from his blazing smile.
Ichigo was flabbergasted. "I'm your son."
"Ugh." Ichigo felt like face-palming himself, but didn't dare to lest he make himself susceptible to another attack.
"You have no idea how hard it was here without you Ichigo." Said person's ears perked up at that. Was he about to actually say something parental and not something psychotic?
"I had to shadowbox with myself for countless days! Yuzu wouldn't do it and Karin just kicked me where it hurt!" He whined pitifully, and Ichigo just stared.
"So how'd it go?" Isshin suddenly asked. Ichigo was dubious to answer, but decided to anyway.
He shrugged. "It went alright." Was his deceptively simple answer. This is to say, it irked the older Kurosaki very much.
"Does this mean you didn't lose your virginity?"
"What?" Icigo's tone was… incredulous…no, incredulous wouldn't even begin to describe the sheer amount of disbelief he was feeling right now.
"You know." Ishhin gestured, "Did you put the pencil in the sharpener? Did you do the deed? Did you stain the bed? Make love? Have se…"
"I GET IT!" Ichigo yelled, feeling very frustrated at the moment.
"I see." Isshin said in a contemplative manner. "I accept you for who you are Ichigo, no worries."
"Wait wait wait." Ichigo moved his hands to mimic the motion, "You're not telling me what I think you're telling me are you?"
Isshin ignored his son's reply. "It's alright Ichigo. Everyone makes their own choices in life. As your father, I will gladly support you in any life decision you make."
Isshin nodded, feeling proud of his little speech. Surely Ichigo will come to terms with his identity as a half-man now!
When he got no reply, he peeked over at Ichigo… who was gone.
"Ichigo?" Isshin looked side-to-side, finding no sign of orange hair anywhere. Then his eye caught movement from his house. The door had shut and he was pretty sure it was Ichigo who had closed it. Quickly he ran over and twisted the knob only to find it locked.
"Hello?" His eye peeked through the eye-hole, noticing Yuzu and Karin enthusiastically greeting Ichigo. He knocked on the door.
He was ignored.
"Hello!" Isshin began knocking on the door in hopes of getting answered.
No such luck.
"HELLO!" He yelled as he continued to pound at the door. When he realized it was no use, he felt rejected and sat in a random corner and began rocking back and forth.
"Don't you think we should let him in?" Ichigo asked, earning a raised eyebrow from Karin.
"Since when were you such a softie?" She replied with crossed arms.
Ichigo scowled. "I'm not. I just don't want him kicking me in my sleep for leaving him outside."
Karin smirked as she nodded approvingly. "There's the Ichigo I know."
Ichigo merely stared before deciding to let it go. He turned to Yuzu, who was quite literally beaming. "Heh, been a while hasn't it?" She asked as she rocked on the tips of her feet.
Ichigo chuckled at the cute mannerism. "Yea, it has."
"I'm glad your back Ichi-nii, dad has been crazy since you left." Ichigo stared. "Well… crazier."
"I can tell..." He replied flatly as he could literally feel his father's negative energies emanating from behind the door.
"Oh! Do you want something to eat? I didn't really have time to prepare since you came so suddenly, but what would you like to eat?" Her eyes sparkled and Ichigo gave in. He couldn't tell her he had already eaten before he got here. She was already so willing to make him something to eat. Might as well indulge her…then again… he really wanted something good to eat other than his own cooking for a change.
"Whatever you want Yuzu. I'm starving." He said, which wasn't a total lie. He was starving for some normal food for a change. That hamburger back there at the station had only temporary satiated his need for some home cooking.
"Right away!" Yuzu saluted before scurrying to the kitchen. A yelp was heard as a bunch of pots and pans clattered.
Yuzu peeked her head from the entrance at Ichigo and gave a goofy grin. "Heh, I slipped!" She said before disappearing once again. Ichigo chuckled.
"Wow, I've never seen you laugh so much." Karin inspected her brother, noticing how his features actually did seem a bit… softer.
"I didn't laugh." Yuzu raised an eyebrow. "Not really anyways."
"Yea, but you seem a bit happier than normal." Yuzu was nearly creeped out when a smile reached Ichigo's face.
"Yea, you could say that." Ichigo replied enigmatically, further fueling his sister's suspicion.
"You lost your virginity didn't you?' Karin said nonchalantly, earning a quizzical and surprised stare from Ichigo. He looked absolutely incredulous at the moment.
"You too?" Karin stared blankly before Ichigo jerked his thumb towards his dad's general direction, "He asked me the same thing."
"You seem suspicious is all." She persisted before her features softened. "Glad your back."
"Glad to be back." He replied before he gave his little sister a hug. It surprised her, but she gladly reciprocated it.
"I want one two!" Yuzu said from the kitchen entrance upon seeing the two. Ichigo tilted his head, indicating for her to join the fun. She did and all three were seen hugging as a certain pair of eyes spied on them from outside, tears streaming down the face.
"I want one three!" Isshin howled towards the moon… even though it was the afternoon. Strangely enough, a few wolves pitched in along, a cacophony of singing echoing eerily around the Kurosaki residence.
"Anyone else getting goosebumps?" Ichigo asked, his face stoic and flat.
"Yep." Both Yuzu and Karin replied as they buried their faces into Ichigo's chest to try and escape the sound. That's when Ichigo realized something.
He pulled back a bit and took a look at his sisters, who were eyeing him. "What is it Ichi-nii?" Yuzu asked.
"You guys grew taller." He stated.
"Well we're not going to stay short forever." Came Karin's wisecrack.
Ichigo shook his head. "I know that, but I didn't expect you guys to grow while I was away." He teased.
"We're not going to stay little forever ya know." Karin replied.
"True." He gave her that, "But I don't want you guys partying all night long when you do get older."
Yuzu smiled and Karin smirked. "You sound more like our dad than goat-chin over there."
"Well, I kind of did raise you for a while." He countered.
"True." Karin let him have the argument, but then cringed when another howl tore through the building.
"I'll take care of it." Ichigo said, having had enough with this ridiculous man whom he called father. He stepped outside the door, intent on shutting up the man once and for all… or at least for a while anyways.
As he stepped out, he noticed the howling had stopped. He was a bit surprised that his dad would calm down so easily, so he went to investigate. He walked a bit out of the way until he found his dad talking with a cute girl in a pretty summer dress. She had long, flowing pink hair and emerald eyes. She looked exactly like Moka… exactly like her…
"HUH?" Ichigo rubbed his eyes to make sure they weren't deceiving him. But reality was a bitch and it currently told him that the person whom his dad was talking so pleasantly with was indeed one Akashiya Moka.
Son of a…
"Oh, hi Ichigo!" The girl waved at him and Ichigo waved back timidly, unsure of how to react to this. Then he saw his dad's eyes bug out and he knew the shit had hit the ceiling, broken through the roof, and ended up in space after destroying a satellite.
"You know this wretched boy whom I call a son?" Isshin's mouth was wide and surprised as his eyebrows rose nearly to his forehead.
Moka nodded gracefully. "Hai. We were good friends back at school before it was destroyed." She replied, thinking nothing of her words. Thankfully she didn't need to for all Isshin could focus on was the fact that Ichigo had met such a beautiful girl and not told him about it.
"How good friends?" He whispered, leaning in so Ichigo couldn't hear, much to the boy's displeasure.
"I'm actually trying to get him to be more than friends with me." She whispered back casually, a bright smile on her face.
"You don't say?" Isshin rubbed his chin as a plan began formulating in his head. "You don't think he's gay?"
Moka shook his head, a small blush adorning her cheeks. "I know he's not. We've shared…intimate moments together." She said bashfully, remembering all the times Ichigo's let her suck on his blood.
Isshin was thinking along other lines. Moka gasped when the elder man fell to his knees, sobs escaping from his lips as he looked to the heavens and shouted, "HE'S NOT GAY! THANK YOU!"
"What the hell is wrong with you old man!" Ichigo yelled, a tic mark throbbing dangerously on his forehead, "Do you know what the hell you're doing?"
Isshin was still sobbing. "I'm so proud of you Ichigo! You're not gay!"
The tic mark grew.
Moka's timid voice interrupted the fight as Ichigo turned to look at her, quickly stepping of his dad's chest. "Err…" He rubbed the back of his neck, scowling, "I didn't mean for you to see that."
Moka shook her head. "No, it's alright. I'm glad to see you're so close with your dad." Ichigo was about to reply, asking if she was crazy, when he noticed how a bit of sadness had crept into her voice before disappearing. Ichigo felt bad for a bit before he was ambushed, thankfully erasing the atmosphere that threatened to turn serious.
Ichigo let out a yelp when his dad snaked a hand around his neck and squeezed. "You are right young lady! Me and this boy are closer than oil and water in a cup!"
Both people blinked. "I think your memory is failing you old man—ACK!" Ichigo pulled away, rubbing his head that had been pounded on a split second ago.
"The hell is wrong with you?"
"Ah! I forgot to introduce myself!" Isshin bowed in a regal manner, ignoring Ichigo, "My name is Isshin Kurosaki, father of this inept boy. What are thou name fair maiden?" He smiled, his teeth sparking as he did so.
Moka sweatdropped. "A-Akashiya Moka." She replied uncertainly.
"Well now this won't do!" Isshin spoke up… rather loudly. "You've probably been traveling for a while, so come, let us retire to my residence where you will be taken care of!"
Before Moka could reply, she was hauled away by the elder Kurosaki while Ichigo was left standing there, all by himself with no one but his thoughts to keep him company.
Ichigo fell to his knees, a terrible fear gripping him as one thought came to his mind:
"What am I going to do?"
And it didn't help that his Hollow was cackling madly while Zangetsu chucked as well…
Kurosaki Ichigo… was in for the ride of his life!