The exorcists gasped in horror. "You're not…" whispered Lenalee.
"You'd better believe it, sister. Hit it Earl!" Road commanded. The Earl obediently sat down at an organ that seemed to appear out of thin air and began to play. Road marched slowly down the aisle. When she came to the long table she lightly sprang upon it and continued her slow promenade. The exorcists felt sick in their stomach and were even more disturbed by the fact that Road was quite a beautiful bride. At long last, the girl reached her future husband and the Earl began the ceremony.
"We are gathered here today to witness the union of these two young people."
"Please don't do this!" Cried Lenalee. Allen looked at her pathetically and turned to his future wife.
"It's okay, Lenalee." He whimpered. "No matter who I marry, I will always love you." The room grew deathly silent as his words sank on the crowd. The exorcists turned to Komui.
"Did you just say what I think you said?" His eyes contained a look of pure evil. Hate seeped from every pore in his body. "Choose your words wisely, for they may be your last." The Earl giggled with delight and sniffed the air.
"Delicious! I absolutely adore the aroma of uncontrolled loathing!"
"I love her like, uh, a... sister?" Alan choked. Road stamped her foot impatiently.
"Come on, Earl-ie! It's my wedding and you're taking to long marrying us. Just skip to the vows."
"Alright my precious." The Earl smiled. He loved her quick temper and vivaciousness. "Let's begin. Allen Walker, do you take Road Camelot to be your loving wife for all eternity till death, or some other means of untimely death, do you part?" Allen sighed.
"And do you, Road Camelot take Allen Walker to be your loving husband for all eternity till death do you part?"
"I…" Suddenly a body fell from the sky and crushed Road beneath it.
"That's odd," remarked the Earl. "I thought I had that leak fixed… Tykii, go repair the roof."
"Now." Tykii slumped out of the room.
"Get off of me!" Cried Road. Kanda jumped off of her body and faced Komui.
"You stupid half-wit!" He fumed. "You left me there, chained to a tree! I'm gonna kill you! I'm gonna…" He stopped when he realized that Komui was not paying any heed to him, but was busy watching the platform that he was standing on. Kanda looked to his left. Allen stood meekly before him. Kanda sized him up: noting the hat, the tux, and the girl in a wedding dress lying on the floor…
"You're getting married?" He screamed. "You can't marry her! You have to marry me!" He lunged at Allen.
"No, please! Today is bad enough alre…" But he was silenced with Kanda's kiss. The exorcists at the table could not believe their eyes. After everything that had happened to them so far, this was by far the craziest.
"Hey, bud! That's my husband!" Road screamed and smacked him over the head with a candlestick holder. Kanda fell hard onto the stone floor. Allen was holding his breath trying to kill himself. "Come on darling, don't be like that." She smiled. "I do." She whispered and Allen could felt his soul leave him.
"That's it!" Cried the Earl. "You are officially married!" He clapped loudly and the exorcists gave a meek cheer after a menacing glance from their host. "You may now kiss the bride!" Road passionately kissed Allen, who only half kissed her back. "I'll go get the food!" The Earl cheered.
"Here, dearest," Road whispered as she placed a ring on his left ring finger. It swelled and then fit itself perfectly to his finger. "It's a special ring that will never come off. That way, you will always remember to whom you must be loyal. And so all the other girls," she glanced at Lenalee, "will know you're taken." Allen sighed.
"Thanks. I guess." Road smiled.
"I knew you didn't totally hate me!" She kissed him again. Then she unchained him and they sat down at the table where the feast was beginning. None of the exorcists had any kind of appetite, but after the Earl reminded them that they did not eat, they would not be freed from their curses. Grudgingly they ate their share.
When the feast was done, the exorcists felt a weight lifted off of them. They could look at each other once again without the fear of losing their minds. "Well, I guess that's it then." Smiled the Earl. "We played with you, and you feasted with us. Everything is right with the world."
"Something like that." Moaned Lavi.
"You should get going now." The Earl warned. "Before we decide to fight you." The exorcists stood up and prepared to leave. "Don't forget that." The Earl pointed to Kanda.
"Ew. I'm NOT touching that. It's disgusting." Allen announced. Krory picked up the sad body.
"Don't worry, I've got him."
"Goodbye, my dearest. I will miss you." Road whispered in Allen's ear. "I will watch out for you."
"Um… thanks. I will… see you around, I guess." They kissed quickly.
"Bye friends. We'll see each other again soon…" The Earl laughed and snapped his fingers, sending the exorcists back to their campground. Tykii walked back into the room.
"Earl, there was no leak. That guy just… Hey. Where did all the food go? Did you eat without me?" Road and the Earl laughed as they waltzed past him.
"Clean up this mess, Tykii. It's a disaster in here."
"I hate you both." He murmured and set to work cleaning up after the wedding celebration.