Oh gosh, I'm a creeper. I want me some Bella and Carlisle. But if you think about it, it's not much more different than Edward and Bella... He's like, 100 and something... Let's just say Carlisle is wise beyond his years!

Disclaimer : I am NOT SM. No way in hell. I wish I was, but I'm not.

This IS a Belisle story. If you don't like it, don't read it! Though I promise you, it's worth the read. Especially if you've read my past works on is RATED M! That means smut and bad language and everything else that makes a story good. :)

Song Fic – I'm Not The One by 3Oh!3

The words in bold are the lyrics to the song.

Carlisle's POV

I sprinted down the hallway. When I'd heard Bella was in the hospital, I hadn't been able to drive here fast enough. When we'd moved here when she was fourteen, when we first met her, I suggested that she switch into my care, that I be her doctor. For exactly this reason. When they brought her in, I would know immediately.

I met the girl at the front desk and asked her which room my patient, Isabella Swan was in. My Bella... My poor, sweet Bella, what happened?

The nurse told me the room and also handed me a manilla folder. I cracked it open to see Bella's name at the top, nodded to the nurse and then started off towards her room, still out of breath. As I flipped open the folder, I read the case.

- Patient presented to the hospital, dropped outside entrance. Nearly naked, head wound, possible internal bleeding.

- Patient inspected, still unconscious. Moved to hospital room.

God, Bella, what happened to you? I asked myself, jumping into the elevator that would take me to her floor.

- Patient woke up at 6:43 pm. Confirms our suspicions that she was raped and beaten. Called Doctor Carlisle.

I groaned, sliding my hand through my hair. My sweet Bella, raped... It had probably been another one of her 'jobs'... I was glad no one else was in the elevator with me as I closed the file and threw my fist into the cold steel wall I was boxed in. I slid that same hand through my hair then, trying to think of what to do.

The elevator opened and let me out onto her floor. I let out a deep breath and made my way to her room, trying to gather my thoughts. All my frustration, my anger... It was all aimed at one person. If she'd let me, I'd take care of him. But she was so afraid...

I reached her room and opened the door. She was sitting up in the bed, flicking through the channels on the tv in front of her on the wall. She didn't seem to notice me, so I watched her. I obsessed over her. My bright angel.

She was leaned back on the bed, drumming her fingers on the side of the bed every once in a while as she stopped on a channel. Then she'd start again. As far as I could see, it was my same old Bella.

"Bella," I whispered as I came into the room fully and shut the door behind me. She jumped and I saw her gaze fall on me. Her eyes, they bore into mine. They were beaten, broken, battered. She was falling apart.

You're way too young to be broken.
You're way too young to fall apart.

When she saw me, her eyes lit up a little and I couldn't help a weak smile. As I thought of her as my light, she thought of me as her soul. We completed one another. But I wasn't right for her. I couldn't let her tie herself down to me...

"Carlisle," she said back, softly. My knees nearly went weak. The sound of my name on her breathless lips... It did frightening things to my body.

"Bella, dear, what happened..." I asked, closing the distance between her and reaching for her hand. She had already turned off the tv and attempted to sit up. I tried to press her back down but she wouldn't have it.

"It started out like any other night. I was in Port Angeles. A guy stopped, I got in his car... He drove me to a hotel..." she started, looking up into my eyes. I was letting myself get too attached. But I was in too deep. I didn't know if I could ever let her go.

You're way too young to play these games,
But you better start,
But you better start...

"He was just a straight up scum bag, Carlisle. I couldn't do anything right for him, and he took it out on me. Eventually, I tried to run," she said. I cringed away, holding onto her hand with one of mine as the other covered my face. I'd known her for so long, I'd known what she was into... But it didn't make these stories any easier. I rarely heard them because she knew I couldn't handle them.

This is when it starts,
From the beating of your heart
Till the streetlamps talk to you.

"He caught me around the waist, threw me against the wall. He continued to have his way with me," she whispered as I looked up at her again. Tears were in her eyes.

"Jesus, Bella..." I groaned, trying to pull away from her. She was telling me too much. I couldn't know this. I'd kill for her. She knew that. She wouldn't let me hand go and she pulled me back.

"He fucked me, Carlisle. He put his hand around my throat and choked me as he did it," she said, her voice turning bitter, cold, as she used her free hand to pull her hair to the side and show me the bruises. I swallowed my rage.

Jumping off of the edge,
Oversleeping your head,
Everything's turning dark to you.

"Dr. Cullen, I didn't know anyone had called you," someone said behind me. Bella immediately released my hand and I took a small step back. Dr. Slaten came in, shutting the door behind him. I tried not to roll my eyes. This doctor was the biggest prick. He'd known, years ago, that Bella had a thing for me and I had yet to stop her.

"Yeah, one of the nurse's called me, since Bella's my patient," I said, nearly spitting out the word 'mine' to him. He lifted his eyes to mine and looked quite grim. But behind his eyes, he was laughing. He couldn't wait to see me fall.

"Well, I figured I could take this case off your hands. You need some rest, doc," he said. I wanted to growl, to pounce across the room and rip his throat out. He was playing some kind of stupid game and I wasn't ready for it tonight. I needed time with Bella, alone.

I went to pick up the parts,
The doctor's hiding the charts,
He won't let me see this side of you.

"May I talk to you outside, since you are here? I have some things to clear with you," he said, indicating with the folder in his hands that we should step outside. I glanced at Bella and she gave me a small, watery smile. I gritted my teeth and turned to follow him out the door. I made sure it was shut before I turned back around to him.

"How dare you keep this from me. She is MY patient, you should have called me immediately," I said, wanting to shove my fist through his face.

"I'm sure that's all she is to you, Dr. Cullen," he said, lethally. I sized him up. He had to only be in his early 30's. He had jet black hair, a long nose, brown eyes. He was the kind of punk that made me glad to be a doctor. He didn't know his head from his ass.

"Anyways, I thought you should know. She might have aids. From what she told us, and from what we saw in the examination, he could have very well be infected and when he raped her, he obviously tore skin. It'll take a few months before we know for sure," he said. My throat closed up on me. I couldn't speak. No, this couldn't be possible... She told me she always used protection and that she'd always be safe.

I turned to my side and looked through the small glass window. I could still see her and she was staring straight at me. Her eyes were worried, stressed. Her eyes led me to her soul.

"I don't think she needs to know the chances of her contracting aids. We can tell her in a few months, when the results come in. There's no reason to worry her," he said, quietly.

It's on the tip of my tongue,
You know you're way too young
To have someone lie to you.

I whipped around, my eyes on fire. This little piss really did want the shit kicked out of him. He obviously saw my rage, because he took a step back and glanced around. I took a step towards him.

"She deserves to know. What if she were to have a boyfriend? You want her to possibly spread it to him?" I asked, the thought alone lighting me on fire. Bella didn't have a boyfriend. She'd made sure of that. She always kept herself open... For me.

The guilt rode hard on my throat, making me want to collapse.

"You worried about her or you?" he asked and I had it. I shot forward and grabbed him by the scruff of his under shirt and held him against the wall. We were alone in the hallway. I'd known that from the moment I stepped outside the door. Vampire hearing and all.

"You keep your nose out of business it doesn't belong in," I growled, feeling my whole body tense. I wanted to feed off him so badly. I wanted nothing more than for him to die at the point of my teeth. I slammed him against the wall for good measure and then dropped him. He scrambled to his feet and took off down the hallway, leaving me to compose myself before I went in to see Bella.

When I opened the door, her head popped up. She was sitting up in bed, her arms wrapped around her legs and pulling them close to her chest. She looked like a frightened deer. My poor, sweet Bella...

"What happened?" she asked, quietly. I shook my head, not wanting to talk about, still trying to get my rage under my belt. "Carlisle, what is it? What did he say?" she asked, prodding me. I turned away from her, trying to clear my mind. It was impossible. She was pressing me for answers.

"Did you kill him?" she asked, quietly. I turned around and walked over to her, shaking my head.

"No, Bella. But there's news you need to hear," I whispered, taking her hand in mine again.

I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.
You'd better find somebody else and get a hold of yourself.
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.

Four Years Previous

We had finally gotten all of our possessions moved in. It had taken about a week, but finally we were unpacked and ready to begin our lives again. I had already been accepted at the hospital at Forks and my kids were already enrolled in the school. They should actually be coming home any minute. Everything was going well. For the most part.

"Carlisle, what's wrong with you? There's no more passion in your voice, there's no more love in your actions!" Esme cried in a whisper. I ran my hands through my hair as we sat in our bedroom. I had made sure this room was sound proof. Living in a house full of vampires, it was bad for privacy.

"Esme, I have passion, I have love. It's just gone between us, now. We've talked about this before. We stay together for the others. They need us. Jasper especially. He still hasn't gotten a hold on his hunger," I said, bringing my eyes up to look at her. There was hatred, anger. But most of all, there was sadness. I got to my feet and walked over to her.

"I told you, my dearest Esme... We are but friends now. I've seen you eye the guys, you'll find another. And when that happens, we'll tell them. But until then, they need to see our strong faces. They need to know there's still hope for our family," I said, wrapping my arms around her and pulling her into a hug. It wasn't that I didn't like Esme. It wasn't that I didn't find her attractive.

But she was no longer the one I wanted to spend the rest of my immortal life with. I didn't technically want to spend it with anyone yet. But I didn't want to watch Esme suffer any more. A vampire without sex is like a high person without their munchies. Deadly.

She deserved to have what she wanted in life.

There was a knock at our door and I let out a soft breath. I pulled away and looked at her, wiping the tears from her eyes gently. I kissed her forehead and waited for her to nod before I stepped away to open the door.

"Hey, daddy-oh! We've got company, so behave yourselves," Emmett said, filling up the doorway. We had enrolled them in the high school as sophmores. It had been a stretch. But the earlier they started, the longer we could live here.

"Oh? Who's our guest?" Esme asked, making herself present as she came to my side. She touched my back and I smiled a little. It's not like I didn't enjoy Esme's touch. She was a beautiful woman.

"Eddie brought home a freshman. Her name's Bella. Apparently, he couldn't leave her alone all day. He said she smells delicious," Jasper said, popping up behind Emmett. I gave him a stern look.

"Behave yourself, Jasper," I warned and he lowered his eyes. "Let's go meet her, shall we?" I asked.

They led the way down the stairs and Esme and I followed, communicating silently with our eyes. A human in the house? So soon? Hopefully this wouldn't become a habit.

"Dad, this is Bella. Bella, this is Carlisle, my dad, and Esme, my mother," Edward said, speeding through the introductions. He was extremely fidgety. The girl must really be driving him crazy.

The girls head lifted a little as she was introduced and I was dumb struck. I blinked, several times. Esme moved forward to welcome the small girl to our home while I just stared.

She was beautiful. She was but fourteen, maybe. But she was incredible. Her eyes were brown, sweet, broken, innocent. There was something behind them that she was trying to mask. I wanted to know what it was. I finally broke out of my stupor and stepped forward, offering my hand.

"Hello, my dear. We're glad to have you. Please, make yourself at home," I said. Her hand... It was so warm, so small and fragile in my hold. I wanted to pull her close, feel her body flush against mind. I mentally batted at myself. What the fuck was wrong with me? She was fourteen!

Everyone's wrong compared to you... You're over four centuries old, my thoughts ran through my head. Yeah, but this was a little different.

"Thank you. You have an amazing home," the quiet girl said, looking up at me. I swallowed, glancing at Edward. There was no doubt he was reading my mind, but I just couldn't stop. She looked so... needy. Something had happened in her life... Was happening? Was it still happening? God, I wanted to save her...

You're way too young to be broken.

Three Years Previous

"Carlisle, beware. Bella's here. Edward invited her, but he won't be happy to know you're still here. You were supposed to leave for California this afternoon," Esme warned me, coming close and pretending to kiss my cheek as she spoke. I blinked, feeling the tingles start to run through my arms and chest at the thought of Bella.

The day after we'd first met, after Bella had left, Edward had been furious.

"How can you have such impure thoughts about a fourteen year old girl? With your wife standing right beside you!" Edward had screamed, locked in my room with me to keep our conversation quiet.

"The same way you can have impure thoughts about her, Edward," I said, in no mood for his bitching. I was too irritated with myself. How could I have felt this way about such a small, hopeless girl? Why did my heart decide to come alive at the sight of her?

Edward glared at me, threatening me with his eyes.

"It's not the same. You're older," he growled. I rolled my eyes.

"Eventually, age doesn't make a difference," I mumbled, running my hand through my hair.

"What about Esme?" he asked, his anger dying and his desperation making itself present. He didn't want to lose the girl. He was truly interested in her and didn't want me to swoop in on her. I sighed. Would he keep his mouth shut? I explained my situation with Esme to him. He didn't like it. He hated it. But he agreed to keep it quiet around the others. He cared for Jasper's sanity too. If the family began to fall apart, Jasper would too, and we couldn't let him result to his old ways.

"I'll keep it quiet... But you need to stay away from Bella," he said, nearly begging. "Just give me a chance with her. I know I can make it work. I need this, Carlisle," he said, pleading with me. I stared at a point behind his shoulder, shutting my emotions down.

And I had agreed with him that night. I would give him his chance. Actually, I would give him several chances. I knew I would be bad for Bella. I knew that I would destroy her life. But so would my son.

But at least he looks young enough to belong with her, my inner voice said. And I had agreed with it. Edward would be much better for Bella than me.

But she had proven difficult. As she got more comfortable with my family, had gotten more comfortable coming over to our house, I had had to deal with seeing her, tempting me, eventually every day. Until the time came when she realized we never ate.

Until we had been careless one day and most of the food had spoiled in our fridge. Until she had realized that we were not what we said we were. We were not human.

And we had told her what we were. Surprisingly, she still came around. She still enjoyed our company. She still stayed with us, keeping our secret.

And she still looked broken.

You're way too young to fall apart.

"I'll try my best, but you know she always finds me. You know I've tried to keep my distance from the girl," I whispered quickly in Esme's ear. She giggled as if I'd said something sweet.

"Just be careful, Carlisle. You know Edward's temper," she said softly, this time actually kissing my cheek. I know she cared for me, still wanted me, but Bella had driven a wedge even further between us. As she walked away, my eyes looked after her longingly. A man had to be gay to not want her.

I had walked around the backyard, dodging Bella whenever I could. She always seemed to know where I was. How could she be so persistent? She was only fifteen. Mind you, she was going on sixteen, but still. Why wouldn't she just leave well enough alone?

"Carlisle," her voice suddenly floated to me. I swallowed, closing my eyes as I turned around to face her. Her voice was like a spring breeze on the ocean, floating and calming me, putting all my fears at ease. I sighed as I opened my eyes to see her.

"Bella," I said, softly, taking in her appearance. She really did live to tempt me. She was filling out more. The dress she wore, it had a lengthy v neck that showed off just how much she'd grown. Even though a scarf was around her neck, it didn't hide what I wanted to see. It was a black dress, clinging to her in all the right placed. I realized it cut off at her mid thigh. I licked my lips as my eyes fell back on hers. She was practically glowing, knowing how she affected me.

"You've been avoiding me," she said, her voice playful, pouty.

You're way too young to play these games,
But you'd better start,
But you'd better start.

"What would make you say that?" I asked, trying to take my eyes off her. When I tried to turn away, my body was like a magnet and pulled me right back to her. My eyes danced over her cleavage, her lean stomach, her shoes, her legs...

"It's not the biggest backyard," she said, smiling as she looked around. My heart melted. God what I wouldn't give to grab this girl, push her up against the side of the garage and take her. Just like she wanted to be taken.

"Bella, I'd never avoid you if I had the choice," I said, smiling and lifting my drink to my lips. I needed something to preoccupy me from leaning in and taking her lips.

She watched me, her eyes glossing over the drink, devouring me. WHY did she do this to me?

"If you had the choice," she repeated in a whisper, her eyes lowering. "It's because of Edward, then?" she asked. I opened my mouth to speak, to deny it, but she rolled her eyes and let out an exasperated sigh.

"Carlisle, I don't want him... I like him, he's a friend... He's cute, but I just... I don't know, it's not there. I know he wants it to be, but I just can't be with him. My dad would kill me-" she cut off her last words, letting them die off quickly. But she had uncovered something that I'd been longing to know for over a year. Her life.

"What do you mean, Bella?" I asked, sidling closer to her. She glanced around, focusing in on all the people. She brought her eyes back to me and indicated over her shoulder. I followed her until we came to the side of the garage (had she read my mind?) and she stopped, turning to face me.

"I'm tired of hiding... I need someone to talk to, but I don't trust anyone enough," she said, her voice breaking a little. Suddenly I thought I might have broken off more than I could chew.

"Bella, I'm here, you can tell me," I said, softly, getting closer to her. She brought her tear filled eyes up to look at me and I melted in her hands. Everything shown through at me then. All her pain, her weaknesses. Her depression, her anger, her fear.

"God, what does he do to you?" I asked, lifting my hand up to brush her hair out of her eyes. A tear leaked over the edge and I couldn't help myself. I leaned forward and touched my tongue to her cheek, stopping the tear in its tracks. She moaned out softly and so did I. An electric current swept through us and nearly brought me to my knees. I pulled away a little, placing my hand on the wall of the garage, right beside her head. I locked her between me and the wall, watching her.

She slowly brought her hands up to the scarf around her neck and loosened it, showing me a bright red welt and bruises marring her neck. I stepped back a little, feeling the rage start to sweep through me. I breathed in through my nose, trying to keep my cool.

"I'll kill him," I whispered, glancing out at the forest surrounding our house. I would go to their house and I would slip in and rip his throat out-

"No, Carlisle, please... I don't-... Charlie's a drunk, he's harmless, most of the time. He just..." her voice broke a little and I turned around to face her. "He's emotionally abusive, physically abusive, but he loves me. He really does, I just do things wrong all the time-" she started but I shook my head, using my speed to reach her. She took in a quick breath. Even though she knew about us, I didn't really flash my powers in front of her. She looked up at me, her eyes sparkling as I touched my fingers to her lips.

"Bella, don't make excuses for him... You don't do anything wrong. You could never do anything wrong," I said, searching her eyes. She smiled a little and I let out a deep breath. She would be the death of me.

I took a step back, realizing that we weren't all by ourselves at this house. I had a party to attend to and this looked utterly wrong, no matter who came by. I took a step back and she leaned further up against the wall. I wanted to take her. So badly.

"Do you have a light?" she asked, quietly. I almost had to look twice at her, not sure if she'd asked. She was digging in her purse.

"Excuse me?" I asked, watching her dig.

"A light?" she asked, finally pulling out her desired object. A box of cigarettes. I swallowed, not wanting to watch her destroy herself. She looked up, saw the look on my face, no doubt. She smiled.

"I'll do it with or without your help," she said. I sighed and dug into my pants pocket for a lighter I had used earlier to light the candles around the house. I walked over to her and she smiled as she held the cigarette to her mouth. I leaned forward and lit it, getting closer to her than I really needed to in order to light it.

"... We're always here for you. If you ever need anything, if you need to get away-" I started but she pulled back and let a puff of smoke off from the cigarette. I clicked the lighter off.

"Charlie's the chief of police, Carlisle. He can do whatever he wants in this little ass town. I'm branded his until I'm eighteen," she said, her voice bitter and full of hatred

It was the second I lit
Your first cigarette,
I forget who you used to be.

"Bella, we can get you away. I can help you-" I started, feeling like I was drowning. After finding this out about her, I couldn't just let her go back to him.

"Stop. There's nothing that can be done. And I'm not going to drag you down with me. I'm only three years away from eighteen... I'll survive. And after that, I'll be free," she said, speaking as she looked out to the side, into the forest. She spoke of freedom as if it were the only thing she desired. I let out a soft breath and touched my fingertips to her cheek briefly before stepping away.

How could you help someone who didn't want to be helped? Who was already so used to this life style that she had deluded herself into staying in it just a little while longer?

I downed the rest of my drink as she took the last drag on her cigarette. She stepped it into the concrete and then nodded to my drink.

"Do you want a refill?" she asked. I blinked, moving forward and opening my mouth to say I'd get it. She shook her head a little, giving me a coy little smile and blocked my way, taking the glass from my hand. She leaned up to my ear.

"I'll get it," she whispered heavily and I let out a deep breath as she stepped away. What was this girl doing? Not just with me, but with her life? This couldn't be what she wanted... This wasn't what I wanted for her.

She walked away with my glass and I watched her, my chest feeling heavy and anxious. There were too many thoughts in my head. I didn't know what to do.

A minute later, I saw her walking back with a drink in her hands. A very large drink. I concealed myself around the corner as I watched her, biting on my lip. Her legs, they went on for miles...

And then I watched her stop and take a drink, her eyes closing as the liquid seeped down her throat. She stood there for a good ten seconds, slowly sipping on the glass, easing whatever tension she had been feeling.

And I bit my lip
The second you sipped
The poison that was mixed for me.

She finally stopped and continued on her way to me. I pulled back and pretended to just be leaning against the garage as she came around the corner. She smiled and handed me my drink. I arched my eyebrow at her as she set it in my hand.

"A little empty, don't you think?" I asked, my voice coming out huskier than usual. She gave a small shrug of her shoulder and then walked back out to the party, swaying her hips and leaving me with half a drink and a painful erection.

I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.
You'd better find somebody else and get a hold of yourself.
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.

Present Time

"Bella, there's a big possibility that you could have aids," I said to her, gripping her hand gently. She blinked and sort of spaced out. I knew she wasn't focusing on me anymore. I let out a deep breath, wanting to tell her this was as hard for me as it was for her. But I'd already made my choice. If she would agree to it.

"Tomorrow's your eighteenth birthday. I want to take you home with me," I said, watching her. Her eyes drifted into her lap. Suddenly, she started crying. I stood up and leaned close to her, running my hand over her back. I shut my eyes, breathing her in. She smelled of soap and Bella. Just Bella.

"I only had to make it one more day, Carlisle... One more day... Why did this happen?" she whispered, finally breaking through to look up at me. I leaned down a little and grabbed her chin in my hand, looking straight into her eyes.

"Bella, calm down... This isn't the end," I said, gazing into her eyes. Those eyes that had me at day one. Those eyes that had helped me ruin Edward's love life.

Those eyes.

"Please, come home to my house tomorrow. You won't ever need to go back to that scum bag, ever again," I said.

Even as she shook her head, those eyes said yes.

The Next Day

I brought Bella home with me that next day. I never left her alone. I spent the night with her in that room and was there in the morning when she woke up. She had been checked out around noon and as we came home, no one was there but Esme. She gave a brief nod at Bella and Bella acknowledged her as well. I lef her straight to my room so she could rest.

"Do you want to take a shower?" I asked, setting her purse down beside the bed. She turned and nodded and I led her to the bathroom. She started to undress before me and I immediately turned around, letting out a deep breath. This was Bella. This had always been Bella. She wouldn't be afraid to show me her body. She already knew, somehow, that I wanted her completely.

"Carlisle," she said softly, after a minute. I took my chances and turned around, seeing her already in the shower, her head poking out from behind the smoked glass. Whatever animal blood was inside my system ran cold. All I could think about was her.

"Can you get me a drink? For when I get out?" she asked. I swallowed, nodding a little. It was the least I could give her.

I went downstairs and was glad Esme was nowhere around. I poured some vodka into a glass with ice and filled it the rest of the way with hawaain punch. It was basically the only thing we had to mix with.

I walked upstairs with the drink, wanting to die. How was I supposed to do this? How was I supposed to deal with all of this? Edward would be furious...

I closed the door behind me and heard the shower was already off. Before I even could look around for a place to set the drink, she opened the door and stepped out in a cloud of steam. She was wrapped in a towel, so I should have been thankful.

But it wasn't enough. She needed to be covered.

"Clothes?" I asked, as she moved forward to reach for the drink. She gave me a small, hurt look.

"You expect me to put those old clothes on? The ones from yesterday?" she asked. I swallowed and licked my lips as I looked down at her.

Please, put ANYTHING on, I begged. She instead took the glass from my hand and started drinking. I put my hand on hers to keep her from downing the whole thing in one sitting.

Drink the poison lightly,
'Cause there are deeper and darker things than you.
I know 'cause I've been there too.

"Bella, this can't be how you live your life... You don't need the alcohol, please..." I begged, putting my hand over the glass in case she thought of taking another drink. She stepped up against me, pressing her body flush against mine. It nearly knocked the wind out of me. I pressed my forehead against hers and closed my eyes, trying to gain my will power back.

"What would you know, Carlisle? Just let it be," she said, pulling the drink out of my reach. I grabbed her wrist and she dropped the drink out of reflex as I pushed her back until she sat on the bed behind her. I kneeled down between her knees and looked up at her, silently begging with my eyes.

"Bella, I'm here for you. Edward, Emmett, Alice, we're all here for you. But you need to confide in them, you need to tell them what's going on, and you need to let go of all the bad things in your life," I said, watching her. She looked down at me, cold, nearly heartless.

"I might have aids. I'd like to say I can drink because of that," she said, looking past me to the floor where the alcohol now started seeping into the carpet. I grabbed her chin and made her look at me again.

"Listen to me. I need you to listen completely," I said, not knowing how I was going to do this. I suddenly decided I didn't care. I couldn't stand by and watch Bella destroy herself, her human body, any longer. There would be consequences later. But for now-

"If you have aids, if it turns out that that is the case, I will turn you into a vampire myself," I said, looking into her eyes to make sure she saw I was serious. "I will turn you into a vampire."

First, she looked confused. Then I watched all the different emotions flash over her face. Happiness. Fear. Sadness. Anger. Anticipation. I hadn't known if she really wanted to become a vampire. She'd never mentioned it to me or Edward. But I guess she didn't find that idea so unappealing.

"But... You need to stay completely sober until you find out. I want you to start living your life as if it were normal. I want you to be happy, knowing that you will live through this no matter what. I want you to start over. I want you to become someone," I said, looking deep into her eyes.

"I'll be with you," she whispered. I blinked, taken aback. How could that be the most important thing on this girls mind? I sighed, leaning back so I could take in a deep breath as I shut my eyes.

"I want... I need you to become someone, without me. You don't need me in your life, Bella. You can be with Edward-" I started, but apparently that was the wrong thing to say. She shot up and nearly knocked me backwards. Had I been human, I would have fallen on my ass. I shot up to my feet instead.

"You want me to turn me into a vampire and then give me to your son? What am I, a toy for you to be amused by? Someone you can fix and then pass on? I don't want your son, I want you, Carlisle!" she cried. I ran my hand through my hair, my eyes escaping her deadly ones.

"Bella, I can't be with you! I'm not the one who wants to hurt you! You need to find someone else, I'm not right for you! You need to live a normal life!" I yelled back at her, so frustrated, so fed up, so done. I couldn't fight her any more. I couldn't fight this feeling inside me, but I knew it was right. I couldn't let her be with me. I couldn't hurt her like I had Esme.

I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.
You'd better find somebody else and get a hold of yourself.
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.

She stood there, facing me in silence. Her eyes were burning holes into my skin, but I couldn't look up at her. If I did, I might fall apart. I might give into her. Her eyes made me do things I'd never thought I would.

"Fine," she shot, her voice deadly. And with that, she walked across the room and opened the door and left. To where, I didn't know.

The Next Day

I hadn't seen Bella in the house the whole day before, but I knew she was there. I could smell her. Bella had a very distinct scent. Edward had come to yell at me, but I had stopped him with one glare. I wasn't in the mood. I had already denied my Bella, the one who made me complete. I had made her hate me. I couldn't stand to be inside my skin.

Not even Esme could make me feel better when she came to the room that night. Sure, we sat and talked, watched tv together, I confided in her what I'd done. She tried to tell me what I'd done was the right thing, but I could tell through her voice. She didn't even think it was right. I was tearing myself apart. But even worse, I was tearing Bella apart. What kind of person was I?

So today, I sat sulking in my room, unable to bare the sight of anyone else. A glance at the clock told me it was already noon. I had already taken a shower, cleaned the room, exercised, and read through some of my work from the hospital. I couldn't concentrate on a single thing other than Bella.

A knock at the door came and I let out a deep breath. It was probably Esme, coming to check on me. I turned off the tv, got out of bed and made my way to the door. Once I opened it, my mouth nearly dropped.

It was Bella.

I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.
I'm not the one, I'm not the one who wants to hurt you.

"Carlisle, I'm sorry for yesterday. I was completely wrong... Can we talk?" she asked, the last question very quiet. I took a step back and allowed her into my room, unable to speak. What was she doing coming to me? She was supposed to be furious. I shut the door behind her and pressed my head against it, trying to get my resolve together again to turn her away.

"Carlisle, I know what you want for me. I agree to your terms, to be sober, to straighten up, to get a life together for myself... But I can't be with Edward. I can't be with anyone else," she said. I couldn't help myself. I turned around to face her, needing to see her. I needed Bella. I needed her in my life.

"I'm in love with you. I can't change that. Ever since I first met you, you were the only man I think about. No one compares to you. No one knows me like you do. I don't trust any one else like I do you..." she said, her eyes dropping to look away from me.

No, please, look at me, I begged, needing to see her eyes. I needed everything about her.

"I'm going to fall apart... I need someone strong to help me through this. I need you," she said, bringing her eyes to mine again.

I know it might seem frightening
To have the world fall apart right under your shoes.
Trust me,
You'll make it through...

I couldn't help it any more. I moved forward and pulled Bella into my arms, feeling her warm body flush against mine. I closed my eyes and buried my nose into her hair. I didn't have the ability to tell her I needed her the same way. I couldn't gather the courage to tell her I thought she was my soul mate.

All I could do was pull my head back, lift her lips to mine and claim her mouth with everything I had.

A/N : ... Ok, sooo... This wasn't supposed to end up this long. I just started writing this and then fell apart at the seems. This wrote itself.

I really want to write a Belisle lemon. Should I? Can I? Oh pretty pretty please, readers? Give me the reviews that say yes?

And I REALLY need feedback on this. It will help me grow as a Belisle writer. I'm really anxious right now about the feedback about this... Pretty please with yummy delicious Twilight characters on top?