Ok, so, I promised you EPOVS of certain chapters and here is the first! YAY. Right, the plan is to have a couple of chapters that you have already seen but from Edward's point of view. These include: Edward and Bella's first meeting, 'sandergate', his date with Tanya, and the first time they did the bad, there may be more, we will just see how it goes. I also plan to write the proposal in full from his POV and probably a future outtake as well. These chapters will be posted as and when I get around to writing them. I don't want to put a time limit on anything. I do plan on adding the chapters quickly, but don't hold me to that lol.
It is so good to be back in this story. I missed it more than I realized.
OK, so here it goes!
Love's Little Book
Chapter 2 –EPOV
It was just another day, like the one before and the one before that. Days tended to blend into one another, when you were all alone.
In the past I had tried to be social, tried to make friends but the task seemed impossible. Every time I met new people I would become so nervous that I would nearly faint. I was a loner, an outcast and most of the time it suited me fine. Yet, sometimes it didn't. Sometimes it hurt, and sometimes I became fed up of being alone.
The book exchange had seemed like a good idea. Edward Cullen the businessman that was who I wanted to be. I thought I would meet new people, make new friends and finally get over my nervous disposition. The reality could not have been further from the truth.
I was struggling. The Book Exchange became more popular then I ever could've imagined and eventually the control I had over everything slipped away. I was overwhelmed with work, my shop was a mess and the customers started dwindling.
I knew I needed help, I just didn't know how to get it.
In the end I made some flyers and posted them around the city. Then I waited, and I waited and no-one came.
I knew I was being irrational, knew that the people who had seen the flyers had no idea of who I was, but it didn't stop me feeling like the lack of response was personal. Why would people want to talk to me? Work with me? I could barely talk to people without shaking and stuttering. I struggled to form full sentences in the company of others. Why would anyone want to spend their spare time with me?
I was feeling sorry for myself and I knew it would solve nothing. I couldn't help it, things were slipping out of hand and I had no idea how to stop it.
Then she walked in.
I was attempting to get through the mountain of paperwork that was piled high on my desk, when I realised I was no longer alone. I looked up suddenly and stood. The chair scrapped across the old floor making a noise that hurt my ears.
Across from me stood a woman who looked as lost as I felt she stared at me with an intensity that was frightening. I did not know who this woman was or what she wanted but I felt like someone was seeing me for the very first time. There was just something about her deep brown eyes that seemed to see into the very heart of me. She was medium height and build. Her long mahogany hair fell well past her shoulders. She was not beautiful but pretty in a nervous and understated way.
"Hi," I said nervously hearing the tremor in my voice.
She smiled and I was completely disarmed. I was wrong before when I thought she was not beautiful. She was.
I didn't know what to say, what to do.
"Hi, I am looking for a Mr. E. Cullen," she said calmly.
I hastily stuffed me hands into the pockets of my jeans, not knowing what else I was supposed to do with them and rocked back on my heels. I wanted to keep calm, I wanted to be self-confident and normal for once but I felt like my heart was going to bust from my chest. Playing it cool was just something I was unable to do.
"Um th-that would be me," I stuttered.
Her eyes widened in shock. I didn't know what that meant. Was she disappointed that I had turned out to be the person she was looking for?
"Oh okay, well, um, I heard that you are looking for volunteers."
I panicked, I didn't know what to do. I never thought that those damn flyers would bring someone like her to my door. I didn't know what to say.
My lack of response clearly affected her too. I watched the confidence she had walked in with falter and I felt terrible. This woman had come here looking to help and there I was making her uncomfortable. She hurriedly searched through her bag and pulled out one of the flyers that I thought had gone unnoticed. She held it out to me her hand shaking with nervous.
"I found this yesterday, you are still looking for help right?" she asked, her eyes were wide and vulnerable and I felt like an utter moron. I had to do something, anything to give her back the confidence I had stolen.
I rushed round the table and stood directly in front of her. It had seemed like a good idea at the time but once I was there I had no idea what to do next. She looked up at me and swallowed hard.
"So, I have no experience and I know nothing about books, but I really want to help," she sounded so enthusiastic. I couldn't believe it. She had seen the state of my shop, seen the state of me and she still wanted to help, to spent time around me.
"You want to volunteer?" I asked disbelievingly.
She looked around the shop. It was a mess, there were books and papers everywhere, it hadn't been cleaned in months and everything was falling apart. I felt ashamed. It was my shop, my business and I had let it get to the point of almost disrepair.
"Yeah. Besides, I think you could really use the help."
I blushed but didn't take offence. She was right, I did need the help, I had asked for help and it had come…in a really pretty and distracting package.
"I'm Bella, by the way."
"I'm Edward, Edward Cullen," I replied.
"So Edward Cullen, can I volunteer for you?" she asked with a smile. If she kept smiling like that she could do whatever she wanted, I thought making myself blush again.
"I, um... yeah, sure. Are the hours on the advertisement OK with you?" I was getting more and more flustered and I was sure it showed. Most people would be trying to get away from me by now I was not the easiest guy to be around but, somehow I knew that Bella was not like most people. She looked at me as though I was the answer to her prayers, which was ridiculous because surely she was the answer to mine.
"Yeah, they are fine,"
"Well, um, why don't you come back tomorrow at one o'clock and we can go over some more things and get you all started," I had no idea what had bought her to my shop; I had no idea why she was not running away like everyone else did. And I most certainly had no idea how I was going to get through spending time with Bella without making a fool of myself. But if she was willing to try then so was I.
"OK, so tomorrow then?" she asked.
She looked me over one last time, smiled, then left.
I stood in the silent shop for a while trying to process everything that had just happened. Bella had just breezed in and shook everything up as though all my foundations had been built on air.
As I stood there I felt it. Change was coming and I prayed to god that I didn't mess it up.
So there you go! The first chapter from Edward, I hope you like him because there is more coming from him soon!
Please leave a review if you would like to and if you can. I would love to know what you think of the inside of shywards head.
Just a brief message. If you are following my other story (Searching for O) there is going to be a slight delay. My laptop died and I lost everything, I have a new one now but all my chapter and notes are gone. I am working on rectifying the situation as soon as possible…well, as soon as I can pay some bloke to break open the old one and retrieve the files, or whatever it is they do, Idk.
See you all soon!