Hello there!

You must be excited about reading this?

I hope you will not be disappointed, I'll do my best!


Bella P.O.V

Darkness before light.

That's how it is.

Darkness then you get light.

It's just the way it is.

When you get born you get from the darkness to the light. When you die you get from darkness to light, into heaven - or where the hell you get. And when you awaken from sleep you come from darkness into light. That is what is happening right now. I'm coming from the darkness of my dream, into the light of-... The night?

I was lying in Edward's bed; the shreds had his lovely smell in them. I slowly sniffed them before jumping out of the bed. Just then I noticed that Edward wasn't there, I frowned and stepped out into the hallway. I looked around, where would he be?

"Why can't you just forget about it, Alice?" I froze; Edward's voice was angry and a tad shaky. His voice came from Alice and Jasper's bedroom.

"I just can't Edward, we're meant for each other, and you know it!" Alice's voice was confident and strong. What did she mean about that? Meant for each other? Edward and Alice, meant for each other? Seriously?

"No, Alice! Bella and I are meant for each other, and you very well know that! You even said that yourself." Edward quickly responded. Why were they having a conversation about this? My sleepy mind didn't really care, I just wanted back to bed, and snuggle into Edward cold arms.

"Then tell me right now, to my face that you don't have the slightest want to kiss me," I suddenly wasn't feeling all that tired. I couldn't believe they were talking like this.. About this. It was just, wrong, I had to stop it.

I opened the door to Alice and Jasper's room, making a fake yawing sound while rubbing my eyes.

Alice and Edward were standing dangerously close, both with wild and angry looks.

"Bella!" Edward's voice was colored with panic.

"Edward?" I tried to sound as tired as possibly. I didn't want them to think that I was ears drooping.

"How long have you been out there?" Alice asked, her eyes narrowed, and her voice shaky and scared.

"Not long, I just came from," I made a big yawing sound. "Edward's room" I sighed.

"Okay,eh... Edward can you get Bella to her bed again, and... Then we can discuss this later," She said eying me, before rushing out of the door.

Edward then scooped me into his arms, bridal style, and walked me back into his room, without looking me in the eyes, one single time.

I sighed as he let my body fall onto the soft bed, and then inhaled.

For once, the smell of Edward didn't relax me, this time it kind of disturbed me.

I could feel Edward's arms surrender me in a tight embrace.

And then I fell into sleep, once again.


The next morning I couldn't stop thinking about Alice and Edward's conversation. Was it reality, or was it just a dream? I sure couldn't ask Edward or Alice, if it wasn't a dream they would just try and convince me that it was a dream. I thought about this as I sat in the kitchen still in my shorts and tank top, eating Cheerios.

Esme, Jasper, Carlisle, Rosalie and Emmett were coming home from a hunting trip today, and then Alice and Edward would go onto one, alone. Maybe I could talk a bit with Jasper, asking him if he had heard or felt anything suspiciously from Edward or Alice.

I quickly finished my Cheerios and went to wash the bowl just as I heard the car's drive into the garage. I smiled to myself; I had missed Esme, Carlisle, and Emmett. Not that much Rosalie, and there wasn't really that much to miss of Jasper.

"Hello! We're home!" Emmett yelled as he ran inside, and into the kitchen.

I smiled to him, and ran to him giving him a hug. He grinned and twirled around with me in his arms. I giggled.

"I've missed you Emmett," I laughed.

"I missed you too, Bells!" He loudly said into my ear. Finally he sat me down on my feet, but as soon as he did I fell but he grabbed me just before I hit the floor.

"Hello Emmett, we're leaving now," Edward said walking into the kitchen, with Alice in his heels.

Yeah, to fuck...

I felt shocked as the thought came into my mind. Where did that come from?

"Already? We just came home Edward." Esme said walking in with Carlisle just after her. She eas frowning, and pouted slightly.

"Yeah," He mumbled, looking everywhere but me.

Jasper and Rosalie came now, their eyes shining golden brown.

"We're both pretty thirsty." He mumbled, eying Jasper.

"Well, then" Esme sighed looked at me, before looking back at Edward again.

"Then I guess, it's best if you go now..." Everybody stood still for a moment.

I followed Edward and Alice, with the rest of the family to say goodbye.

It was almost like Alice tried to escape Jasper as he came to give her a hug.

I looked at Edward, he wasn't looking at me. He was only looking at Alice and Jasper.

A sudden jealousy, anger and hurt filled me; he could at least pretend that he didn't want to be in Jasper's shoes!

After they left I quietly walked to the library, still not bothering to take other clothes on.

I sighed as I closed the door after me, picked a random book and fell into a little couch.

It appeared that it was an old book about world war one. I guess it was Jasper's. I sighed and walked back to the shelf where I found it, but just as I was about to place it in its plaice a sudden deep voice startled me.

"Don't make me stop you from reading it, go ahead." He said from behind me. I quickly turned to look at him. He was standing two meters away from me, starring at me.

"I didn't know you where in here." I said slowly. I suddenly felt so very naked in these clothes. He noticed and a small smiled appeared on his face.

"Obviously," He said, looking at me right in the eyes.

"Why are you in here?" I asked, my breathing was started to pick up a bit.

"I don't know," He said after some time.

"I guess I felt like it was the place to be," His smile slowly dropped.

I smiled a shy smile to him.

"Well then..." I said, turning to the book again and walked to the couch right behind him.

He turned to look at me. I raised my eyebrows at him. He didn't say anything so I let myself sink into the book.

I could feel that he also sat down in the couch, every fifth second I looked up from the book and looked at him, only to see him staring right back at me, and then I would blush and go back to my book.

"Why are you starring at me?" I asked while turning a page not looked up at him.

"Why are you so calm?" He just asked back.

"Why shouldn't I?" I asked looking up at him between my eyelashes.

"Because I'm a vampire with bad control" He stated.

"Well first of all," I said, laying the door down on a coffee table. "You just got home from a hunting trip," I said smiling at him. "And second," I said leaning a bit in to him. "I trust you," I said winked to him, and then I took the book back and started reading again.

"You really shouldn't," He said after some time. I sighed, rolled my eyes, and laid the book down again and looked up at him.

"Well, I do!" I said a bit annoyed.

"Why?" He asked. A sudden idea came into my mind.

"Will you answer a question if I answer that one?" I asked raising my eyebrows at him.

"Okay," He said slowly after a minute of thinking.

"Have you..." I closed my eyes hard, sighed then looked at him. "Have you ever, like... I don't know thought about... Eh this is stupid..." I mumbled jumping up from the couch, going back to the bookshelf, closed my eyes again and pressed my hands against my head. Why do I have to start things like this? Because you're stupid Bella, that's why!

Without looking I knew that he was standing behind me.

"Have you ever thought about me, more than just... I don't know, friends?" I asked. Nothing happened.

After a while I turned to look at him. He was staring at me.

I wanted an answer but I was too afraid to speak.

"You have no idea," He mumbled almost too low for me to hear.

I had never seen Jasper struggle with his words, never.

I thought for a moment before walking towards him, slowly I lifted a hand to touch his shoulder.

I wanted to hold him, smell him, look at him, and kiss him.

The desire was rising in me, he looked at me his eyes screaming in confusion and hope.

He then slipping an arm around my waist pulling me towards him, I fit perfectly into his arms.

He was so cold, and yet so warm, I smiled to him.

We stood like this for a moment, just studying each others faces.

Then without thinking I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled his face towards me.

His eyes were big as he looked me into my eyes, he really had wonderful eyes. He looked at me for a second then slowly pressed his lips against mine.

It felled just like a first kiss, at the front steps after your first prom... Exciting, new, pure.

But this was just the start, soon enough his lips started to move against mine, mine followed his.

So soft and yet so hard, at the same time.

My hands made their way into his hair, while his hand rested on my hip, as the other hand pressed against my back holding me in place.

All too soon I to needed oxygen damn it and my human body. He quickly sensed it, then leaned just enough back so our lips weren't touching, yet our noses were.

He suddenly looked sad and frustrated "I'm sorry Bella. That should never have happened" He said, his head was hanging a bit, but he didn't back away from me.

"You really shouldn't be sorry," I said smiling at him, as he looked up through his eyelashes.

He was clearly still upset and a bit confused.

I crushed my lips against his again. He froze but quickly kissed me back, this time it was harder, more needing.

I moaned against his lips, and he kind of growled in response. I smiled against his lips, this was a real kiss!

Then, without me noticing us moving, I hit a bookshelf with my back, I leaned a bit back to jump up, hugging his waist with my legs. I heard him groan, at the feeling.

I felt his icy tongue against my lips, silently asking for entrance which I quickly gave him as I opened my mouth.

I ran my fingers through his hair, his soft dirty blond hair, as his tong explored my wet mouth.

I could fell his fingertips, playing with the small piece of skin visibly on my stomach, leaving a tinkling felling on my flustered skin.

I then moaned in pleasure, God this was nothing like I've ever imagined!

Was this even possibly? Or was it just a dream? Why would I dream of Jasper?... I already knew the answer, but I couldn't even get myself to think it...

I knew the kiss soon was going for its end, and I didn't like it... I wanted to use my whole life, no I wanted to use forever kissing Jasper, and his incredibly lips. I moved my hips against his crotch making an unbelievable tension between my legs.

He groaned against my lips and suddenly I was lying with my back against the couch.

It was almost all too much, all this lust and attraction building up, I was almost feeling high.

His lips were suddenly gone, I was going to complain but then I feeling his lips against my neck, sucking; driving me mad.

"Oh my God!" I moaned into his hair. Sniffing a bit to it, he smelled like honey, green fresh apples, and brown... He smelled like brown, I wanted to tell him but I got interrupted by my own moan.

How did he do this? It should be illegal! But God, it was hard thinking when he did this!

Then suddenly he was gone. I looked around in confusion; he was sitting in a chair away from me, reading a book, like nothing happened. Just then Emmett came in through the door. Oh.

Fuck you Emmett...


So what do you say? I worked really hard on this one... Specially with the kiss, because I have never really been kissed... *Awkwaaaaard*

Well to make it up for the embarrassment you could leave a loving review to make me smile?

Press the magic button!

l

V

Apparently he was bored, so he came to the "entertaining" human... Like I was any fun now, when he interrupted in a really good make out now I was sitting here in a couch in the living room, looking at Emmett, Jasper, Esme, Carlisle, and Rosalie talk about what we could do."What about a trip to the forest?" Emmett asked."Not with that," Rosalie said, tum pointing at me, for the 30th time. I just rolled my eyes, again. "I heard you," I sighed, again."I know," Even if she had her back to me, I could still hear her smile."Rosalie!" Carlisle hissed, and glared at her. Oh happy family!