Disclaimer: I do not own Code Geass. I do own the plot. All songs used belong to their respective artists.
Because maybe you're gonna be the one that saves me.
And after all, you're my wonderwall. – Wonderwall by Oasis
Silence filled the chamber after those amethyst orbs slipped shut, the pale pink lips that went with slightly parted from being previously open to scream. In his time as a soldier, Warrant Officer Suzaku Kururugi, whom had heard many screams of terror and pain, was now equipped with an immunity to the sound. In his time as a friend, Suzaku Kururugi the student, however, he had never heard the other male he was still pinning to the ground release such heart breaking sounds.
He ignored how he could hear his better judgment, beginning to crawl out of the woodwork of his mind, screaming in protest to the treatment.
"Shall I have him returned to Ashford Academy now, Your Highness?" He asked, glancing up through his bangs at the larger man seated on the thrown. There was something about how the other man seemed almost proud at how he'd made his own son scream that filled the young soldier with dread. This dread, he realized, was reasonable at how the other smirked down at him.
"What good will that do him? He is a completely blank slate," The Emperor answered calmly, leaning back in his seat. He kept the smirk in place while tilting his head a bit, trying to get a better look at the unconscious form tied up in a straight jacket.
"You erased all of his memories?" Suzaku asked suddenly, lifting from his position a bit with wide eyes. He felt his heart rate pick up as fear gripped at his heart. He hadn't meant for this to be Lelouch's fate! The cold eyes of the emperor narrowed on him and he quickly returned to his previous pose, head bowed in respect and shame. "My apologies, You Majesty, I was just a little surprised."
"You are pardoned, Sir Kururugi," He said calmly. Suzaku stared at the tiles beneath him, still in disbelief that Lelouch was really completely erased. "Take him to the genetic development team lead by Lloyd Asplund. I'm sure they can make good use of a pathetic sack of shame like my ungrateful, undeserving, wretch of a son."
Suzaku took a deep breath. "Yes, Your Majesty," He said as he stood, picking Lelouch's body up calmly and walking out. He was surprised at how light Lelouch was; he had always know that the other male rarely ate, a concern that Nunnally had confided in the young Japanese youth a few times, but to think he was this light was a little disturbing. Was it possible Lelouch had been starving himself? He shook the thought away as quickly as it had appeared due to the fact he knew Lelouch was not like that. Lelouch was the smart one between them; Suzaku was the illogical masochist. But then… What would they be now, given the other boy's now vacant sense of self?
"You deserve this, to some degree," He said aloud, stealing a glance at the unresponsive figure below him. He looked back up, heading down the long hallway to the hanger where he knew Lloyd and Cecile would be, finishing the repairs on the Lancelot. "You were just manipulating all those people, getting their hopes up and pretending to help them when really you were just trying to help yourself. This is your punishment for all the lives you've ruined, all the lives you taken, and all the sins you've committed." He continued on. If he kept talking maybe he could convince himself this really was for the best. "And now you'll be used to help better the world and save lives. At least now you won't be killing people even if… Even if you might die during all of the tests." He said slowly, stopping midstep and looking down. It was hard to believe that the boy he'd been holding down a few minutes ago was the same creature in his arms now.
Lelouch's face had softened and relaxed, all traces of tension or stress clear from him. His chest was rising and falling in a slow, steady pattern. For a moment Suzaku remembered an incident from when they were children living in the Kururugi home. Nunnally had gotten sick after an outing in the rain and Lelouch had stayed by her side loyally, despite Suzaku's attempts to get him to leave the room and play with him. He came back an hour after his fifth attempt to find his friend snoozing in his chair, arms folding under his head on the side of the bed. Lelouch had looked so innocent and fragile in that moment that Suzaku realized that Lelouch was a sensitive creature despite the tough exterior he showed the world. For a moment Suzaku pretended that they were back at that time, and he was merely carrying the petite young Lelouch to his own bed so he could rest easier. He was snapped back to the harsh reality when the sound of drills and machinery caught his attention.
Lloyd glanced over, one brow raised behind his glasses and a smile turning up his lips. "My, my! What have you got there, Suzaku?" He asked cheerfully. Suzaku noticed a yellow-green blotch on the side of the other male's face from where he'd punched him earlier and a small bit of guilt filled him. The scientist walked over and carefully examined the unconscious male, his hand curled around his chin in thought. "This boy looks somewhat familiar to me." He said calmly.
"I doubt you know him," Suzaku lied calmly, keeping his face calm and collected. He then shifted Lelouch a little, as if the other was difficult to keep up. "The Emperor asked me to bring him to you. He will be your new test subject starting today." He caught a quick glint of devious delight in the other's eyes at his words before he turned around, clapping his hands and catching the attention of his female assistant.
"Cecile~! I need to run an errand with Suzaku real fast so please make sure the repairs remain on task~!" He sang happily before spinning back around and walking to a nearby door. He pulled out a key from his lab coat, unlocked the door and opened it, indicating for Suzaku to go first. The young Japanese boy did so, walking into the dimly lit stairwell. Lloyd shut the door and flipped a light switch, bright fluorescent light revealing the metal staircase to the pilot. "How generous of His Highness to remember I requested a new subject! This must be my lucky day!" He mused, slipping past Suzaku and beginning to walk down the steps. The other followed him quietly, trying to settle the nervous tremors in his belly.
"What exactly do you need him for?" Suzaku asked softly, looking around. He was startled that the stone walls were painted grey around them but there were splatters of red; the red hue of blood. Suzaku knew that it was blood simply because the color haunted every dream he had when he slept in the barracks, remembering the day he had killed his father on accident. Why was there blood on these walls? What had occurred in this stair well?
"It's nothing you need to worry yourself with, Suzaku," Lloyd said calmly. They took the rest of the steps in silence before reaching another door. Lloyd pulled the key back out again and unlocked the knob, pushing it open and leading the young man out. Suzaku's heart caught in his throat and his grip on Lelouch tightened a little bit.
There was a large surgical table in the middle of the room with think black straps to hold someone down. The walls were basically see through cages with tons of different things, that Suzaku assumed were once people, trapped inside. Some of them still bore some likeness to a human while others looked as if they were just pieces of various dead animals sewed together in a sloppy, careless way. One of them looked at him with large, sad blue eyes, it's long and taloned hand scraping across the glass as if bleeding him to free it. It's mouth opened to speak but the bottom half of it's jaw fell off and blood soon followed, flowing like a crimson waterfall. His stomach lurched forward and he had to swallow hard to keep back bile. Lloyd saw his reaction and glanced over. "Ah, it appears specimen 392 has reached it's end. How tragic," He said with the kind of sigh someone gave when they had lost a bet or hadn't gotten what they wanted. Lloyd walked over to a nearby trunk, positioned underneath the surgical bed, and pulled out a pistol. Suzaku wanted to protest, to cry out against what he knew was coming, but was unable to. Lloyd pulled out a small card key, slid it into a slot, and the large glass doors lifted into the ceiling. He cocked the gun, pointed it at the creatures head, and pulled the trigger without so much as flinching. "Well this works out nicely! I'll call a janitor, have this room cleaned up, and then we can put little specimen 393 in here." He mused, looking over at Lelouch with a proud smile. "Just place him on the surgical table; you deserve a nice rest after the wonderful things you've accomplished for Britannia."
'Wonderful thing for Britannia, huh?' He thought to himself, body shaking all over. Was it too late for him to take Lelouch and run away? He could steal the Lancelot, get Lelouch something to wear to hide his face, go to the Black Knights and claim that he was a double agent, that things got out of hand when he took Zero to the Emperor… But there was Kallen and that green haired witch, C2. They would never let him get away with it and he couldn't trust Lelouch to their care. Without his memories he was the only one who could take care of the ebony haired male if he took him away with him.
"Well, hurry up, Suzaku. You need to get a good night's rest since you'll start training and such tomorrow," Lloyd said, walking over and resting a hand on Suzaku's shoulder. The other male jumped in shock before looking over. The scientist calmly took Lelouch from Suzaku's arms, set him on the table and began strapping him in. "I guess I'll see you later then. Toodles~!" He sang excitedly, glancing up and waving at Suzaku with just his fingers.
Being the well-trained soldier he was, Suzaku walked away and kept his head bowed as he walked up the stairs with the speed of a sloth. Halfway up, a man carrying a mop, bucket of water, and a basket of various cleaning supplies darted past him. He glanced at the other for a moment, realizing he was also Japanese, before turning back and heading off. When he slipped out past the door, a perky male with bright blue eyes was grinning at him. He recognized him immediately as Gino Weinberg, the Knight of Three. "Are you Suzaku Kururugi, the new Knight of Seven?" He asked happily.
"Yes, I am," Suzaku said in a dead tone of voice. The other blinked, puzzled briefly, before grinning back even wider at this. He tossed his arm over the other's shoulders, pulling him close and forcing him to walk with him.
"I'm you're new tutor! I'm supposed to show you to your new room as a Knight of Round and help you adjust to the new training regimen you'll be following! So, if you have questions, I'm you're go-to guy!" He beamed. Suzaku realized as he walked with the other that Gino was a lot like how he'd been when he was younger… Or, rather, before Euphemia had died and he'd learned of Zero's identity. "For now, however, I'll take you to your new room. All of your things have already been moved in. Pretty quick, huh?"
"You really make sure to take good care of your knights, don't you?" He asked calmly. Despite being the knight of a member of the royal family, Suzaku had been forced to stay in the barracks with the other Honorary Britannians. But now he was not the loyal friend and knight of a princess, but the obedient lap dog of His Majesty, Charles Zi Britannia; it was the difference of how a stray mutt would be treated in comparison to an award-winning purebred.
"The only people who get treated better than us are the members of the royal family!" Gino laughed happily as they walked out of the knightmare hangar and into one of the many white hallways.
'Except for the ones you can't use, like Nunnally or Lelouch, right?' He thought bitterly as they walked, not saying anything else the rest of the way. Gino prattled on animatedly about this or that, using his hands and face to express his opinion. Suzaku was slightly surprised that the other male either didn't notice or didn't care that he wasn't registering any type of response on his face to what the other stayed. When they reached the room he paused and looked at the blonde. "If you don't mind, I was just planning to rest and relax since it sounds like tomorrow is going to be a rough day." He said in the same monotonous tone as before. The other nodded and gave his back a hearty pat.
"No problem, no problem! Just make sure to set your alarm for seven because that's when I'm going to come and get you!" He hummed before walking off farther down the hallway. Suzaku opened the door quietly and looked around at the room.
All the walls were pure white and the large, king-sized bed was covered in a cobalt blue bed spread set. There was a mahogany desk in one corner with a nothing on it, the closet was a walk-in filled with his few items of clothing inside with little shelves at the floor for his socks, shoes and undergarments. He slid the white double doors shut again before turning back. Across the room from the closet was a private bathroom with all white and blue décor to match the main room. His toothbrush and other toiletries were already placed in their proper places. The bathtub with adjacent shower nozzle at the top had little jet pumps on the side, which made the tub less of a tub and more of a Jacuzzi. The room was simply wonderful and by far better than any room Suzaku had ever had before, even as a child in the Kururugi house.
And while he enjoyed this, Lelouch was trapped in a cell down below, being given drugs that would most likely mutate him into a beast-like creature, cause his limbs to fall off and blood to gush, and then get a bullet between his eyes.
Suzaku learned the next day that by training, which he thought would be work with the knightmares, was actually a sparring season with the younger boy. He also learned that Gino had been training to become a Knight of Round since he was a very young child, being raised close to the palace and being well acquainted with the children of the Emperor. After a session in which he and Gino had laid heavy blows and exhausted themselves, the other male had grinned and offered the young Japanese boy a water bottle. "It's hard work but it's well worth it," He said with a smile, sitting with a small sigh. Both boys were shirtless with only mesh shorts on other than that.
"You said if I had any questions I could just ask you, right?" The brunette asked calmly after taking a sip of his water, screwing back on the cap and playing with the bottle. The other male made a small noise of agreement while chugging down a large gulp of his own drink. "Did you ever know Prince Lelouch, by chance?"
"Sure! He and I were kind of friends, actually!" He said with a bright grin, screwing the cap on to his own water bottle as well. He grinned lightly, looking up at the sky with a reminiscent look on his face. "He was kind of stuffy and uppity, really protective of his little sister, Princess Nunnally. She had this terrible tendency to do things that were really dangerous, like walking on walls with thorny bushes on either side. He really liked to read too. Oh, and sometimes he'd play with Princess Euphemia." He mused aloud, not noticing how Suzaku flinched at the mention of the late princess. He then blinked a few times. "In fact, she was the only other member of the royal family, aside from Lady Marianne and Princess Nunnally, that he got along with. He would play chess with Prince Clovis and Prince Schneizel but he didn't really like either one of them; he said Clovis was a simpleton that was too easy to beat and that Schneizel was always so pompous when he would beat him."
"I see," He said softly. He continued to toy with the water bottle in hopes of calming himself back down. He knew that Lelouch had always been protective of Nunnally and he had once mentioned she'd been a little bit of a rebel before losing her sight and ability to walk. Suzaku had always wondered if Lelouch was exaggerating, given her mild-mannered and cheerful personality in the time he'd known the to siblings.
"Lelouch was kind of a jerk and sometimes I really didn't like him but he was still a nice guy underneath it all. I was really sad when I heard he was dead; I'd been hoping to become his knight if he ever returned to royalty," The blonde male said lightly, closing his eyes peacefully. Suzaku glanced at him curiously, examining him, before mentally deciding that Gino would never have been a good knight for Lelouch; the young prince would have needed someone whom he could have a battle of wits with, like the Japanese boy sitting with the blonde. For arguments sake, however, Suzaku had ended up being a treacherous friend so what did that say for his abilities as a knight? "He was actually kind cute and petite. Like a little girl or something." He giggled lightly, blushing a bit at his own words before jolting up and looking over at the other sadly. "Oh, wait, you knew him didn't you?" He asked worriedly, sympathy filling his eyes.
"It's okay, Gino," Suzaku said while looking up at the bright blue sky and fluffy white clouds, "I thought he was kind of a jerk at first too. We ended up becoming really good friends, though, and I realized that there was no point to all the war and madness. We weren't all that different and after a while I realized that, aside from a few cultural and personal beliefs, he was a normal ten-year-old kid like me. I was really sad when it came to an end too." He mumbled sadly. He shifted his gaze down to his hands, wrapped tightly around his water bottle.
He really would miss having Lelouch around to hang out with. They really were quite the pair, capable of accomplishing anything as long as they were working as a team. But the days of their alliance were all gone and there was nothing left now between them. It was suddenly very hard to think that soon enough Lelouch would most likely be dead at the hands of his once loyal subjects.
I told myself I won't miss you
But I remember
What it feels like beside you. – Better Than Me by Hinder
When she finally awoke from everything she was floating calmly atop the ocean, eyes trained on the inky night sky and the twinkling stars. She had a hunch that the once grand flying knightmare frame they'd stolen from Britannia was nothing more than a large metal scrap heap at the bottom of the vast sea now. She also knew that her newest charge was most likely captured by said empire and made useless to her. She assessed this situation and concluded it true due to where she was at current time; if her charge had been successful in his plans, he would have retrieved her by now.
Lelouch was many things but he never left her, given their contract, out on her own for too long. Heaven knew that if she didn't get her pizza she'd become his worst nightmare.
She heard a soft whirling noise not too far off and glanced over, ignoring how the sea water stung when it hit her eyes. It was a small black boat of sorts. She knew almost immediately that it was an item belonging to the Black Knights, the very group her young charge was the leader of. "C2!" A familiar female voice called as a dark figure leapt from the edge of the boat into the water and swimming toward her quicker than the metal ship was going. She made a small noise of pain when a hand wrapped around her waist, resting on a still healing wound. "Are you okay?" She gasped worriedly.
"Don't worry, Kallen, I'll be fine once I get on board, get something to eat, get updated on the whole situation and get some dry clothes on. Though it won't be in that order; I want clean clothes and food before I start stressing out about this or that," She said in her usual monotonous tone of voice. The other girl gave a small relieved sigh before tugging her along, swimming back to the ship at a slow and steady pace. "He's gone, isn't he?" She asked after a moment of pause, filled only by the sound of Kallen's strokes and the waves splashing around them.
"Yes. Suzaku took him away to see the Emperor," Kallen whispered back softly, tone filled with guilt and sorrow. C2 didn't try to press the matter with her any further, deciding instead to focus on getting herself taken care of before chasing after the ghost of her young charge.
And after getting cleaned up and downing three full pizzas on her own, C2 sat on her bed on the boat, hugging her Cheese-Kun plush to her tightly, and watched the fidgeting red-head over just the top of the plush toy. "So you just stood there and watched it all go down? How valiant of you," She said bluntly. The other twitched before standing and glaring at her furiously.
"I didn't have any other choice! I was emotionally unstable and confused! I didn't know that they'd execute Lelouch!" She snapped angrily. The announcement of Zero's private execution had come up on the news about an hour ago. Kallen's eyes brimmed with tears and she sank back into her seat, trembling with sorrow. "I… I didn't know that it would be like that… I didn't know that they'd kill him."
"Don't be an idiot," C2 scoffed flatly, "the Emperor would never kill his own child willingly. He's a sadist with the desire to turn the whole world into an empire he's in charge of but he wouldn't kill a child of his as clever as Lelouch."
"What do you mean?" Kallen asked with a sniffle, wiping one of her eyes lightly on the back of her hand. She blinked, fighting the tears that had begun to brew their away again, focusing instead on what the other had said. "Lelouch is… Royalty?"
"Banished royalty, but royalty all the same. Don't act so surprised; you're a smart girl and I'm sure you noticed Lelouch's naturally regal personality," She said breezily, flopping over on her bed to lie on her side and observe the other woman. Kallen couldn't really argue with C2 there. After the time she spent in student council with Lelouch she now knew it had to be true; Lelouch was great at paperwork, meticulously tidy with the files, finances and other necessary documents, and had a strong yet gentle way at dishes out the work evenly that kept you from resenting him for assigning you a task to complete. She had wondered if he was perhaps the son of an aristocrat who died in the war but later decided that was impossible, given the aristocrats that attended their school did not seem to know him well and the fact she could not find any tie between his last name and any company or federation.
"So how are we supposed to find him and bring him back to our group? We need his leadership if we want to have any chance of defeating Britannia and liberating Japan," She said worriedly after snapping back from her trail of mental ramblings. The other held up her hand, her index finger sticking up and pointing toward the ceiling of their room.
"For now, let's focus on gathering the scattered members, finding out who we've lost, finding a place to hide the members that are well-known for rebellion, since they will most definitely be hunted, and try to get more new recruits. When the time comes I'm certain we'll be able to contact someone to figure out exactly where our little leader has been sent off to this time," She said calmly. She then stretched out a little bit and yawned lazily, enjoying the feel of a full stomach and comfy bed beneath her rather than the cold salt water she'd been floating in not too long ago. "We'll raise the suspicion of the other Black Knights if we start chasing a ghost and Lelouch will be rather disappointed in us if we should get him back to find we've lost almost all our troops and have no equipment to use. If he hasn't lost his minds because of whatever Britannia did to him, that is."
Kallen flinched and tried to fight back the helplessness and guilt she could fell clawing its way around in her gut. Lelouch had been Zero, the man of miracles. He had fought for Japan, whether it was for Japan or for his own form of vengeance against his homeland, and lead them to many victories over the world's most feared and powerful country. She shouldn't have turned tail and abandoned him when the road got a little bumper than she'd expected; she had been afraid to accept the consequences of knowing the truth. But now she knew and she wanted to save him to repent for her mistake before because she wanted to believe, no matter his real reasons, that he did believe in and fight for the rights of the Japanese. "And who will help us? Do you have some friend in the military, working as a mole for us?"
"Not in the least," She responded calmly, flopping over so that her back was facing the other woman. She could feel bright blue eyes glaring at her in suspicion and a spark of rage. She nuzzled closer to her Cheese-Kun plush, letting her eyes drift shut and let her body relax. She deserved a nice, long rest after what she'd been through today.
"Well then who are you expecting to tell us? No one in the Britannian army is going to yield information to a green haired weirdo and her Japanese friend," She said in sheer annoyance, eye beginning to twitch. She was starting to wonder, after only a few minutes of talking with the other woman, how Lelouch had dealt with her for so long; her cryptic talk and uppity attitude were enough to turn the most patient of monks into a yelling, swearing machine. "I mean, even the Honorary Britannians in the army won't help us! What with that prick Suzaku climbing up the ranks to a Knight of Round, they'll think that if they're loyal and determined they be able to do that too. Ignorant fools don't know that he was given that position because he was willing to betray his own homeland and one of his best friends." She scoffed flatly, glaring off to one of the large metal walls of the room.
"Exactly," C2 sighed again, closing her eyes a little tighter and trying to will Kallen away. Too bad Lelouch wasn't around; he could have easily shooed the red-haired woman away with a few pretty words. Unlike him, however, C2 had never had a fondness for using false kindness or smiles on anyone. Lelouch had been raised as royalty, often dealing with eager-to-please aristocrats, and had been forced to use said things as a defense mechanism, which was later disarmed by one Suzaku Kururugi. Then again, after the pair was separated he'd been forced to rebuild his defenses and then, when the emerald eyed male came waltzing back into his life, his systems went haywire and things started to get out of whack. That was the reason he was where he was now; wherever that was.
"Would you just tell me whatever you're trying to imply? I'm not as good at reading between the lines as Lelouch is!" Kallen roared angrily, standing up from her seat. She was beginning to get tired of the other woman's little word games; she should either tell her what the plan was or keep her in the dark until the moment to initiate said plan was upon them! Beating around the bush and playing peek-a-boo would get them absolutely no where!
"Once we've accomplished all our other goals we're going to seek out good old Suzaku and see if he can gives us a little information in regards to our precious prince," C2 said calmly, shifting on the bed and pulling the covers around her figure and cuddling deeply into the pillows and comforter. She let out a contented sigh as she relaxed into the warmth and let herself begin to drift away. "Something tells me that even Suzaku will have a few problems with whatever happens to Lelouch. Whether he wants to admit it or not, he does have a small urge to protect Lelouch from things that have the ability to harm him. He'll help us because Suzaku wants to enable Lelouch to prove him wrong; Suzaku just hasn't realized it yet."
Kallen stayed quiet, watching as the other woman began to drift off to sleep, while wondering if her little scheme really would work out for the best. Suzaku was stubborn in his own beliefs and seemed the type to rather roll around in his own misery silently than admit the fault in his logic and morals.
She could only hope that Suzaku's bond with Lelouch was stronger than his desire to preserve what remained of his pride.
Four months had passed between the day Suzaku handed Lelouch over to Lloyd and today's conversation. On the outside, Suzaku made himself seem as if he was simply absorbed in his work as a Knight of Round when on the inside he was a total mess. At night he'd wake up screaming from these terrible nightmares revolving around Lelouch. Most of them involved Suzaku standing before Lelouch, who looked like a cross between the creature he'd seen that day and a walking skeleton, with a gun in hand. His body would move of its own accord and place the muzzle against the other's forehead. Just as those familiar violet orbs registered on him, filled with begging for salvation, he'd pull the trigger and just stand there, watching the body fall and twitch before going still. It was hard to keep it to himself, given he could not share this fear with just anyone, and he feared he might spill it given what he was about to do. Today he was having tea with Nunnally and lying to her was the most difficult challenge he'd ever faced; even piloting Lancelot was easier than this.
"So there has still been no luck in locating my brother?" Nunnally asked softly, stirring some sugar into her cup of tea. Suzaku took a quick sip of his own drink, hoping that the scalding liquid would calm his stomach back down. He had told Nunnally that after the Black Rebellion Lelouch had been missing in action; not a lit but also not the full truth. The students of Ashford Academy had had their memories altered so that the absence of the Lamperogue siblings would not seem bizarre or unnerving.
"I'm afraid not. He wasn't among the dead, however, so there's still hope that he's alive somewhere," He said gently, reaching over and taking the smaller girl's hand in one of his. He sincerely wished he could comfort Nunnally and tell her the truth about what had happened. The only problem was that Suzaku was not willing to sacrifice everything just to appease the Emperor; tarnishing Nunnally's faith and adoration in her older brother, no matter what crimes he'd committed, was one thing he could not do in good faith.
She took her own hand back slowly and folded it with the other in her lap. He blinked, a little hurt by the gesture and understanding that she didn't want his sympathy, and returned his own hand to his lap as well. "That doesn't mean that he survived, Suzaku. It simply means that he may have gotten away from all the chaos before help arrived; he may have died somewhere else because of injuries and he just hasn't been found yet," She said n a soft, sad tone of voice. Suzaku blinked, stunned to hear such terrible things come from the little girl's mouth.
"Nunnally, you must remain optimistic about this," He said in a stern yet caring tone of voice. He wanted her to keep her faith that Lelouch was alive and well; her faith was all he had left. As long as Nunnally believed in her brother's well-being Suzaku could have some type of peace in knowing where he really was. He could delude himself as long as he kept Nunnally trapped in the fantasy with him.
"How can you ask that of me, Suzaku?" She asked softly, lifting her head and sounding completely appalled. Her face had scrunched up a little bit like she'd tasted something sour like when they were children. "I have been waiting four months to be reunited with my brother and every time I ask it's always the same thing! Lelouch would not have left me for this long unless he could not get his way back to me; and even if he was held up he would send me something to let me know that he was alive and would come back soon! He hasn't returned to Ashford Academy looking for me, he hasn't called and he hasn't sent any letters to try and reach me! My brother has to be dead!" She cried, tears beginning to leak from her closed eyes, her lids clamping together tighter as she tried to hold them back. It only caused more of them to fall down her cheeks. "Please… Please don't try to lie to me, Suzaku. I don't want to be tricked anymore." She whispered in a trembling tone, her little form shivering as she began to sob in to herself weakly.
"I'm so sorry, Nunnally," Suzaku whispered, closing his own eyes tightly and taking in a deep breathe through his nose. He knew that she was growing up but he didn't want her to have to face this matter of all things. Lelouch had always been so good to her, so gentle and devoted. He had loved Nunnally in a way Suzaku knew very few people loved each other during these times of strife and bloodshed. He had to swallow hard to fight back the urge to break down and confess to her all the secrets he'd been holding deep inside. The only thing that kept him from sharing was that he didn't feel anyone deserved to hear what he'd seen and live with the horrors that the same fate may have befallen their own flesh and blood.
"He was all I had left," She whispered, pulling out a cloth handkerchief. Suzaku recognized the thin white fabric with its laced border as a gift Lelouch had made for his precious little sister during the summer they'd all been living together on the Kururugi family lands. "Mother was dead, Father didn't want us and now Lelouch is gone. Sure, I have all my half siblings like Schneizel and Cornelia, but I don't know how to interact with them. They expect me to just be prim, proper and sweet all the time. I can't talk to them like I could with Lelouch and they don't understand how I do things like Lelouch did. They think I can't do anything alone, that I'm nothing but an invalid. My tutors and nurses treat me like a five-year old child. I just… I want my big brother." She sniffed weakly, dabbing her eyes with one corner of the handkerchief. He looked down while trying to fight back the guilt that was beginning to build up deep within him.
"Please don't cry, Nunnally," Suzaku said softly, feeling his body tremble. He took in a breath and tried to calm his obnoxious shakes; he was stronger than this! He looked at the sightless girl with a stiff upper lip, trying so hard to not let the guilt that was crawling around in his stomach overwhelm his senses. "I promise I'll find Lelouch; no matter what condition he's in."
She sniffled lightly and lifted her head again, tilting it toward him. "Thank you, Suzaku," She said softly. She set the little cloth down and reached over for his hand, which he gave her quickly. She gave it a little squeeze, dabbing her eye with the handkerchief with her other hand. "Thank you so much."
He nodded and closed his eyes, wondering what he would do now; he had succeeded in putting himself between a rock and a hard place.
The smell of chemicals seemed so much stronger in the current humid cell he was trapped in. There were only five holes at the top allowing any amount of air circulation into the small area. He paced anxiously, pausing occasionally to stare at the see-through wall in hopes of finding a way out. After five seconds of pondering he would turn away and begin pacing again. Lloyd smiled as he sat on the exam table, clipboard in hand, and watched the other walk around. "Movement hasn't been affected by the drugs in the slightest, although balance seems a little better with the added length to the spine," He mumbled as he jotted it down. He heard a thump and looked up, watching as the caged individual jumped as high as he could, trying to find a higher up escape route.
After crashing back to the ground, letting out a pained hiss, he shook his head and looked around again, hoping to find a vantage point to escape through. He walked over to the bed, hoped up, sat down, and just examined it, eyes jumping from here and there frantically. The scientist on the other side of the glass laughed lightly before scribbling something down again. He then stood and pulled out a large black machine with a long nozzle attached with a large suction cup at the end. The person trapped in the glass box hissed angrily, crouching down low and tight between the bed and the wall. He knew all too well what this meant.
Lloyd stuck it over the little holes in the top, reached over and turned the machine on. It let out a loud grinding noise while releasing a sleeping gas into the little area. He hummed and watched as the hissing and growling slowly died down, eyelids drooping and fluttering as the gas began to work. After the other was asleep he flipped a different switch that vacuumed out the sleepy fumes before he opened the door and looked down at the little figure.
The small victim was asleep soundly and wearing a very small version of the prisoner's outfit with a few altercations; the straps were removed and the sleeves shortened so that they barely covered his new hands that were a bit fluffier than they'd been before and now came equipped with long claws. His ears were now fluffy as well and sat atop his head like little triangles. He had a long black tail and his feet matched his hands. "Hmm. It appears that the subjects DNA has stabilized and merged with the feline genetics quite well. He has no issues, there have been no mutations, and his mind seems to be that of the animal I've fused him with. This little cage isn't big enough to satisfy his curiosity, though," He mused aloud, tapping his chin lightly with one hand. He then blinked and smirked devilishly, a familiar Japanese pilot's face popping into his head. "But if I place someone else in charge of his study and treatment, well, then I'll really know what's going on in his head."
The other remained silent, unaware of the plans in store for him.