Never again would I choose a meeting over time with Trey. I have built my life around Trey…now I have to take 16 kids out for ice cream. I hope somebody besides me orders a vanilla cone…..
It's been a fun ride. Once Ranger got his head out of his ass he joined us in parenting, Arianna, Trey and the twins. Yes, the evening of the State Championship Les and I had twin boys.
We named them John and Jason. They looked just like Les and they were Double Trouble. Between the two of them one would think of what would get them in trouble and the other one would expand on it. They were climbers, so Les, Ranger and the rest of the MM built a climbing wall in the gym when they were two. Ranger called in one of his friends and had harnesses fitted for them every year.
One day when the twins were 4 I got a call from Les to stay where I was and he sent Hector to make sure I did just that. Hector had learned to speak English and he told me nothing was wrong there was just a little glitch in a system. I knew that was a bunch of bull and told Hector so. He just smiled at me and started to give me a neck massage. I was looking out the window when I saw all the Rangeman SUV's come speeding into the garage. UH OH! This was not a good sign.
Ella was escorted into the room I was in by Luis and he stood at the door.
In a low voice Ella told me something was happening in the gym. I looked at her and she looked at me and we both said TWINS. Ella jumped up and pretended to faint Hector and Luis rushed to her side and I flew past them out the door and down the steps.
I ran into the gym to find all the guys looking up.
Earlier in the week a couple of zip lines had been put across the gym's ceiling by the guys to have some fun on a rainy weekend. They hadn't realized that the boys had watched them. Les and Ranger were on "twin duty" while I was working to finish their dreaded reports.
The boys had wandered over to the climbing wall and harnessed each other up and proceeded to climb the wall. Not one of the MM, Les or Ranger had paid attention. So goes that theory of them always being aware of their surroundings!
One of the zip lines was about a foot off the end of the climbing wall so John and Jason wanted to try it out and borrowed some clips, figured out how to attach them and went for a ride. The problem was they didn't have enough weight to keep up the momentum and they got stuck midway. They loved it. They started bouncing, they had their forbidden, by me, slingshots with them and their bags of, forbidden by Ella, gumballs and the MM were their targets. First victim was Tank who thought Hal was responsible. Hal was still laying on the ground unconscious after Tank punched him. Cal had started to walk over and stepped on a gumball and fallen. Bobby came over to help Cal and saw the gumball just as he felt one hit his head. He looked up and almost had his eye put out. He yelled at them and yelled for Les and Ranger who were sparring…they looked up and panicked. Les had sent Hector, Ranger had the control room call everyone in. Brett had harnessed up and was climbing the rockwall when Vince stopped him. Vince was afraid that Brett's weight combined with the twins weight would be to much for the zip line and it would break.
Ram, Les and Ranger figured to get the boys down they needed a bucket truck, but there was no way to get a bucket truck into the gym, Ram suggested explosives and knock a hole in the gym wall to bring in the truck. They were trying to figure out how much explosives they needed. Louis came down and suggested scaffolding. Ella and Hector stood there and Ella and I looked at each other again.
"Men!" said Ella with a disgusted look.
I looked up at my boys. "DROP THE SLINGSHOTS!" I yelled.
Two sling shots were dropped…
"PUT THE BAGS OF GUMBALLS IN YOUR POCKETS-NOW!"
Two bags of gumballs disappeared.
"Now shimmy over to the end of the zip line by the climbing wall and come down here."
"Move it NOW BOYS….don't make me come up there after you!"
They shimmied over and climbed down. They had there heads down and slowly walked over. I looked over at Ranger and Les and made the come here sign. I glared at the rest of the guys while Les and Ranger moved to where I was standing. "Upstairs Now ."
When Bobby yelled, Ranger and I stopped sparring and looked up.
My God, my baby boys were hanging on the zip line midway across the gym 30 feet in the air. "Don't move boys! I called Steph and calmly told her to stay where she was and sent Hector go make sure Steph stays where she is till we get the boys down."
Ranger was on the phone to the control room telling them to pull everybody back and to get all available men to the gym.
I realized the boys were not scared. They were using their slingshots with gumballs for target practice on the guys. I realized in the back of my mind that they were really accurate. I saw them aim at the bell on the boxing ring and heard the two pings from them hitting it. Ranger looked over at me and said "They have one hell of an accurate eye" Then he laughed.
"You realize Steph is going to kill both of us. We were supposed to be watching them while she wrote our reports."
"Well, let's figure how to get them down, then we will call our lawyer and update our wills because you are right she's going to kill us." replied Ranger.
While all avenues of rescue were being considered Stephanie ran into the gym looked around and the looked up.
She yelled and I looked around behind me to see where my mother was, so did Ranger and every other guy in the gym. When had Steph developed a ***gasp*** mother's voice. The boys dropped their slingshots, pocketed their bags of gumballs, shimmied across the zip line and climbed down the wall, and walked over to where she was standing with their heads down.
Steph looked up at us and beckoned us over. Ranger and I walked over and she quietly said "upstairs." It's a long walk to the executioner's office.
"Steph, when did you get a mother's voice?"
"I got it last month when the boys learned how to pick locks and broke into Ella's food storage locker and ate all my Little Debbie Swiss Rolls."
"Beautiful, you only eat them when your pregnant...
With all the plans we were working on to get the boys down not one of us thought to tell them to come down. This was definitely a KISS moment. I think after the boys are given a fair hearing Ranger and I are in for a Keep It Simple Stupid lecture. Then I want a real kiss to make up, heck make that a lot of kisses. Ranger, what the hell are you doing in my Lester's Notes.
all this kissing has to stop Hey! don't use the delete key stop-im-med-