Warning: Contains the usage of two mild swear words, and scenes of a pyjama nature.

Summary: The Doctor and Donna try to cope with being asked to investigate a hotel alien sighting by Torchwood. Written for a prompt given by louiecat68.

Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who, a hotel or a goody basket.


Chapter 1 - Any Room For A Bed

.

"Thank you for choosing the Mudlark Hotel. I hope you enjoy your stay," the hotel receptionist smiled at the couple staring at him with nervous trepidation. He handed over the keycard to room number 312. The man and woman turned from the desk and walked towards the lifts.

"Are you sure you asked for a twin room rather than a double?" he overheard the redheaded woman ask the brown-haired man.

"Of course I did!" the man insisted, "You were there when I asked!"

"Yes I know, but with your luck we'll end up with a single room," she mused exasperatedly.

"Well, if it turns out to be wrong I'll let you personally come down here to reception to sort it out," he promised.

The hotel clerk smirked as the pair entered the lift and headed towards their room. He couldn't wait to tell Carl the chef that he had just won their bet and unofficially handed in his notice.

Donna and the Doctor eyed each other in the strange light of the lift. Why were these things always so dismal? Donna had been quite excited when the Doctor had proposed that they stay in a hotel whilst investigating sightings of a rare species of alien. Her imagination had run wild with possibilities for where their stay could be: Las Vegas, Dubai, Sydney, Rio de Janeiro, or even somewhere different like Reykjavik. But it was too good a feeling to last. Their destination was London! Whoop-de-doop! Boringly everyday London! Okay, some people might have been excited by the prospect, staying in a five-star hotel no less, but she had bloody lived there all her life, for crying out loud! If all else failed she could hop on a train and visit her family she supposed. Wouldn't take her more than thirty minutes even at the height of the rush hour, unless someone elbowed her off the Central Line.

A sudden thought struck Donna. "Did you pay for this room with a credit card? A genuine credit card?" she asked the Doctor.

He looked sheepishly at her, "Might be!" Her questioning glare made him add, "I got it from Jack at Torchwood. He said to use it whenever we needed to buy things when investigating aliens for them."

"Oh, so all this wasn't your idea after all," Donna replied. "Thought as much! Do we get a fancy dinner as well?"

He grinned, "Yeah! Why not?"

The lift doors tinged, and they got out on the third floor, finding their room with ease. What they found inside didn't make them feel easy; there was a large double bed instead of the expected two singles. "Oh, for the love of…!" exclaimed Donna. "I knew it! I just knew it!"

"It looks a pretty big bed though," the Doctor sat on the bed and bounced up and down experimentally.

"That is not the point!" Donna almost spat out. "I'm going to give that little twerp on the front desk such a piece of my mind."

As she strode out of the door to confront the receptionist, the Doctor couldn't resist shouting out, "Save some of your mind for later!"

"Ha ha!" he heard echoing back down the corridor.

There was a new receptionist on duty when Donna got there, and she could not have been nicer. She apologising profusely, and having checked the hotel details explained regretfully that there were no twin rooms left in the hotel. "I am so sorry Mrs Noble. Do you want me to contact another hotel in our chain to see if they have such a room available?"

Donna sighed. "No, don't worry. The Doctor wanted to stay in this particular hotel," Donna gave the receptionist a polite smile. "Whilst I'm here, can I book a table in the restaurant for tonight?"

"Certainly madam," came the reply. "And to show how apologetic we are we will send up a bottle of champagne to your room after your meal."

As Donna travelled back up in the lift, she thought of all the things they could use that credit card for to gain compensation for their inconvenience. Still… the Doctor did seem to love that bed.

# # #

They had a delicious meal in the featured restaurant. The ambience was romantic, but the pair of them decided to ignore that. What they couldn't ignore was the couple on a nearby table. The woman in particular kept looking at Donna and whispering to her companion.

"What is her problem?" Donna icily asked the Doctor in hushed tones. "She is really getting my goat looking at us like that!"

The Doctor squeezed her hand consolingly. "Try not to worry too much. It's not as if we've never attracted attention before, is it?" he quietly placated her. "Don't forget, you've even been lauded as a queen before now."

"Yes, I know, but this feels different. I expect people on other planets to ogle at us as if we're prized specimens, but here on Earth, and in London in particular, I don't expect to get looked at unless I'm doing something extremely peculiar!" she admitted.

"Perhaps she is jealous that you're with me?" he tried, and was pleased with the answering smirk. "Or how about, she is jealous of me for being with you?" Donna made a scoffing noise at that suggestion.

"Oh my god!" they suddenly heard the woman in question exclaim, "I know where it is where I know them from!" with that, the woman jumped up from her table and made her way across to them, looking extremely excited. "Excuse me," the woman began, when she reached them, "but don't I know you?"

The Doctor cut in over Donna before she could make some trite remark. "I'm sorry," he said, "but I don't remember meeting you before."

"That's because we haven't," she explained. "You're that couple off the telly, aren't you?"

"What couple?" Donna was perplexed.

"The couple that got married on the river thing," the woman spoke as if they were complete idiots not to know this fact.

"The river thing?" the Doctor echoed as he ransacked his memory for a wedding there.

"You were on the telly on the Thames Barrier!" the woman insisted. "You had your wedding dress on, you were soaking wet 'cos of the Christmas Star thing blowing up, and you were laughing together," she looked between the two of them. "The news reporter said that nobody knew who you were, but they wished the happy couple well on their wedding day, and that anyone who saw you should contact them," she had a hopeful expression on her face as she eyed them.

The Doctor and Donna exchanged a knowing look, and the Doctor took a firm hold of Donna's hand before saying, "Ah, yes, the wedding… well, we wanted to keep things quiet. You know the sort of thing, so we'd be ever so grateful if you could keep this to yourself. We were hoping for a romantic weekend away together before…"

The woman suddenly looked horror struck. She glanced at Donna's stomach, and turned back to the Doctor, "Oh I'm so sorry. Of course, I won't tell anyone you're here. Yes, I certainly, wouldn't want to upset you or anything… but before I sit down again, can I ask a question?" The Doctor raised a quizzical eyebrow. "Can I have your autograph?"

# # #

"I cannot believe I've become famous!" Donna shook her head. "Did I really just sign an autograph? I must tell Gramps about this." She had been animatedly talking and peering out of their hotel window but she spun back to the Doctor, "Did I get it wrong, or did she assume that I was pregnant?"

"I think she might have done," he agreed, as he stood checking the settings on his sonic screwdriver. "Certainly seemed that way, though that thought would sort of follow on from the assumption that we got married that day."

"Yes, that was weird." She smiled at him, "Not exactly out of the ordinary when you look at our track record, but it is weird to think there was video 'evidence' on the news!"

The Doctor chuckled, "Are you saying that we can't deny it this time?"

She playfully swatted his arm, "Anyone would think you like the idea of being married to me!"

"If you're going to go along with the married idea you'll need to start wearing my ring again," he teased her. "Shame they took out the 'obey' bit out of the wedding service."

"I wonder what I did with that ring? Probably in my jewellery box somewhere." She studied him, "Would you really be happy with me obeying you? You'd think I'd lost it or something if I did! Women have enough to put up with when they marry without having that obeying nonsense thrown in."

"You're right, I would think things were amiss if you obeyed me," he grinned broadly. "I don't think being married to me would be a hard task."

"That's because you are on the other side of all that manic behaviour," she laughed. "You ought to try it from over here!"

She laughed harder when he walked over to stand next to her. "Nope, doesn't look worse from here," he declared, as they giggled together.

"Oi you! Get on your own side of the room!" she pretended to tell him angrily.

"About that; what are we going to do regarding the bed problem?" he sobered to asked her.

"Erm… well, I think I can manage to avoid lunging at you in a bed that size. Do you think you can resist me for a whole night? After all, married couples do tend to not…," she waved her hand vaguely at the bed.

"So I've heard," he smiled. "We'll be fine I'm sure. It's only for a couple of hours until we go alien hunting. Unless you want me to put up a wall of pillows or something?"

"Don't be daft! I'm not that much of a distrusting prude!" she insisted.

"Ah, but that does suggest that there is a little bit of distrusting prude in you," he smirked.

"Watch it, you! I have to be so careful what I say in case it gets twisted, don't I?" she playfully threatened him. "Just keep yourself to yourself, and we'll be okay."

"Yourself to yourself? What the heck does that mean?" he looked at her with an extremely puzzled expression. "Does that by any chance suggest that I have wandering hands or something? Because I'll take umbrage if it does!"

Donna patted him on the cheek, "You can take whatever you like, within reason." She laughed again as his eyes widened. "Now go get your pyjamas on while I make use of the bathroom."

"Yes dear!" he mocked her. "Anything you say, dear!"

"That's right. Be a good little husband," she ordered, as she picked up her nightwear and flashed him a cheeky grin before disappearing into the en suite bathroom.

Coming out of the bathroom, the Doctor entered to do his ablutions, and Donna heard scuffling by their room door. "Sounds like our champagne might have finally arrived!" she called out to the Doctor as she cautiously opened the door, having put the chain on just in case.

Opening the door a crack, a hand shot in and grabbed her wrist; that's if you could truly describe it as a hand. It was extremely grey and smoky looking. Donna shrieked and tried to pull back, but whatever it was had a tight hold on her.

The Doctor appeared with his sonic, concentrating the beam on the grey appendage. There was an eerie shrill cry from the other side of the room and the thing let go of Donna's wrist. Donna had gone into shock, she looked petrified, and there was no way the Doctor could have got passed her to investigate the creature. He would have to contact Jack instead as soon as possible.

He quickly became worried about Donna. She hadn't moved at all since she was released. "Donna? Can you speak to me Donna?" he tried, as he examined her eyes. Her body stayed stock-still but her eyes were wild with fright, begging him to help her. "Don't worry Donna. I'll fix this." He rubbed her arms and he was relieved to feel her body relax oh so slightly. Obviously, massage was the way to go with this problem.

He tried to lead her to the bed, but her body was too stiff, so he lifted her the short distance, and managed to lay her down. He took the opportunity to phone Jack to warn him about the creature, giving him a possible species name. The Doctor then brought his attention back to Donna, deciding to massage her jaw first, since he would need spoken confirmation if he were doing things correctly. Donna remained in a petrified condition, but once he had manipulated her neck and jaw, she managed to push out the word, "Cold!"

"You're cold?" he kept eye contact again. "Where are you cold?"

"Everywhere!" Donna forced out through clenched teeth. Her eyes were a little less frightened, but he had the feeling that he had better act quickly before this condition became permanent.

"I need to get your muscular and nervous system working again properly, and for now that means massaging your muscles. Are you okay with me continuing?" he began to pull back the bed covers from underneath her.

He got a mumbled, "Yes," as a reply.

He lay down next to her and pulled the duvet over both of them. "I'm also trying to keep you warn. No funny business, I promise you." He sensed rather than saw a small smile on her lips. Her muscles were extremely tight; he worked as quickly as he could, massaging her arms, legs, hands and feet, whilst keeping up a running commentary of inane chatter since he knew she would worry if he went silent on her. The Doctor was especially relieved that he got a proper smile when he commented, "This is just like playing tents!" though he had mixed feelings about not getting the slap he would normally have got with that joke.

Donna's body began to finally relax a bit more. "Warmer. Still don't feel right," speaking was an effort still, but she managed to get out more than one word this time.

"I'll have to stimulate your nervous system somehow. Do you mind if I examine your spinal cord?" the Doctor asked as he massaged her shoulders.

"No. What you do?" Donna found that Pidgin English was working better for her.

"I'll have to turn you over and get to your back. And I'll have to… erm… take your pyjama top off," he explained. At her answering glare he said, "I need to examine your spine as closely as possible. Sorry."

Donna shut her eyes in thought, then murmured, "Go for it."

Between the two of them, they managed to turn her over onto her stomach. He placed her head comfortably on a pillow so that she didn't suffocate, and they tried jointly to undo her buttons. He then gently removed her pyjama jacket, trying to avoid the breast area as best he could.

Running his fingers down her spine, he massaged the muscles in her back. Donna bit back a groan of pleasure, and made a mental note to ask him to do this again some time. This thought process was cut short when she felt his tongue on the base of her spine. He licked his way up her spine, and Donna had to fight hard against her natural repulsion of this and let herself enjoy it instead. "Why you lick?" she hissed out.

"I can diagnose and stimulate you better this way," he replied after several more licks. "Do you mind me doing this?"

"Different," was his reply.

He gave her spine a long lick from the base to her neck, "Is that better? Are you feeling something happening?" the Doctor asked when he finished.

"Yes. So much better," Donna got out.

"Looks good from where I'm standing too!" came a different male voice from the end of the bed.

Donna screamed and the Doctor appeared startled from underneath the bed covers. "What the hell are you doing there? And how did you get in?" he demanded.

"Oh, we have keys to all sorts of things, Doctor. If I had known you were having so much fun I would have waited before bringing you up the antidote," the stranger smiled leeringly at them. "Nice to see you too, Doctor; think you can manage to introduce me to your friend?"

Donna had gripped his leg in panic, so the Doctor rubbed soothing circles on her back. "This isn't the time or place for that, Jack!" he admonished the stranger. "I need to give Donna here the antidote as soon as possible. I've kept at bay the worst effects, but I'm not sure how long she'll last."

Jack threw them another leering look that the Doctor decided to ignore for Donna's sake. He helped gather up the covers around Donna so that she could sit up against the headboard with some modesty, and they both looked at Jack expectantly. Jack handed a syringe to the Doctor and he administered it, injecting Donna in the arm nearest to him. "Is the antidote working?" Jack asked them both.

The Doctor caressed Donna's hand, "Are you feeling better yet?"

Hesitantly, Donna tried speaking again, "I feel miles better, thanks. Blimey! That wasn't an effort!" She smiled at them.

"In that case, I can now say Captain Jack Harkness, meet Donna Noble!" the Doctor beamed at her.

"Pleased to meet you!" gleamed Jack as he took Donna's other hand and kissed it.

Donna blushed profusely. "Look at me! Caught in bed semi-naked with two men!" she laughed. "What would my mum think?"

"Let's not tell her, eh?" the Doctor laughed too and put a consoling arm around her shoulders. "Although I'd be in more trouble with Wilf if we mention this."

Jack studied them as they sat closely together in the bed. "Are you two a couple?" he asked.

"Oh no.." began Donna.

"We're not.." continued the Doctor as they did their usual 'we're not married dance'.

"Okay!" smirked Jack, "I'm off to check on my team and see what they've done with that Mimori."

"Me what?" asked a puzzled Donna.

"Mimori," repeated Jack, "that was what attacked you earlier. Thanks to the Doctor's description we were able categorise, name and find the correct antidote in record time." Something buzzed in his ear. "Be right there, Gwen!" He turned back to the Doctor and Donna, "Sorry folks! Duty calls. I have an alien to tag. We'll have to catch up later! Nice meeting you Donna!" and with that he was gone in seconds!

"Are all your friends like that?" Donna asked the Doctor.

"No, not all of them! Just Jack, though there is a slight pattern emerging," he smiled back at her.

"And you're okay with him catching you with your tongue on my back?" she giggled.

"Knowing Jack he might have wanted to join in," he guffawed at Donna's shocked expression. "I wouldn't have let him touch you, don't worry."

"What makes you think I would have objected?" she got the chance to laugh at his surprised expression. "Not that I'm saying I wouldn't have objected, but still…"

"Hark at you! Madame Donna" he teased.

"Watch it! I've got your number!" she threatened him.

"Is that the room or telephone number? I need you to specify." He was enjoying getting back to normal with her.

She made a scoffing sound, and went to snuggle back down under the covers when she suddenly went bright red again, "I forgot for a moment that I'm…"

"That you're what?" he looked puzzled.

"Sitting here like this," she looked down at herself. "Do you mind?" she asked as if he would be deeply offended.

"Would you feel better if I took my pyjamas off too? Oh, hang on… that sounds worse… doesn't it? Forget I said that… it was completely stupid. What was I thinking? You'll have enough ammunition now to get at me for weeks… that's if you want to bring this up in the future… and I'm not sure that you will. Just ignore me, please… I… I'll stop talking now, as I seem to be digging myself a bigger hole," he finally stopped talking.

Donna laughed uproariously, "Don't you ever stop babbling?" She tenderly caressed his face, "Thank you for being so understanding. You're a true friend."

"And not a husband anymore?" he pretended to be hurt.

"A husband can be a best friend too, you prawn! You can be my husband any time you like," she promised.

He released his hold on her. "Oh, I'd better…erm… go and let you… the pyjama top…," he stammered as he leapt out of the bed.

"While you're up, see if that champagne has arrived yet," she called out to him as she fumbled for her pyjama top, and then attempted to put it back on under the covers.

"You'll never guess what I found outside!" he bound back to her from the bedroom door. He deposited onto the bed a large basket holding a bottle of champagne, a box of Belgian chocolates, a card offering the hotel's apologies, and a voucher for a pampering massage. "Are these good enough benefits for being married to me?"

"I bet you use that line on all the girls," Donna laughed, as the Doctor immediately opened the chocolates and began eating them. "Oi! Save some for me! I dunno… husbands these days… can't take them anywhere…"

"Sorry dear!" he passed her the box, and they dissolved into a fit of giggles.

"Shall we celebrate our divorce then?" Donna asked him as she munched on a chocolate.

"Let's save the champagne for that later. I thought you might have other plans," he grabbed another chocolate.

"Why's that then?" Donna asked between mouthfuls. The chocolates really were delicious and more-ish.

"You might have some baby plans to execute first!" he threw at her as he jumped out of the way of the slap he'd expected as a reply.

"You cheeky git!" she squealed, lunging across the bed in an attempt to thump him again.

"Now, now, we don't want you upset in your condition," he grinned as he ducked out of the way a second time. "Otherwise I'll have your number one fan after me!"

Donna rugby tackled him in an effort to keep him in one place, but she was laughing too hard to inflict physical pain on him, and decided to let her weight be his punishment. "You are evil at times! I've a good mind to tell Gramps I'm pregnant and you're the father just to spite you! How'd you like that idea?" she thrust her face into his.

"Is that your idea of a chat up line? Only it really isn't doing it for me!" he smirked back at her.

"Tell that to your sonic!" she trilled, not moving from her position.

His eyes narrowed, "You are so…"

"Come on, give me your best shot, Timeboy!" she mocked.

"That's it! I want a divorce!" he pushed her off him with ease.

"I knew it! I knew you could never hack it as a husband," she did as merry a dance as you can whilst lying on a bed.

He sat up and pouted. "I'd make someone a wonderful husband," he insisted.

She sat up next to him and patted his shoulder consolingly, "I'm sure there's someone out there for you. There must be someone amongst all those thousands of billions of beings." She looked him right in the face, "I suppose we have to crack open the champagne now if we're officially divorced?"

He considered the garb both of them were wearing, "Maybe it would be more beneficial to open it when we get back to the TARDIS? I think it will be safer there."

"Whatever you say, Spaceman," agreed Donna. "Our work here is done after all."

The Doctor gave the bed a longing glance as they stood up, "Yes, time to leave. Wish I could take the bed with me."

"I tell you what," Donna promised him, "when we get home I'll ask the TARDIS nicely to give you a similar bed. How does that sound?"

"Thank you, Donna," the Doctor hugged her and kissed her cheek. "What would I do without you?"

"Buy a whippet?" she retorted.

"Oh no! Not Eric and Ernie jokes now!" he groaned. "You'll be singing Bring Me Sunshine next!"

"I can honestly promise you that I will not be singing that," she eyed him intensely. "Now get off me, I have to get dressed." She picked up her pile of clothing and headed for the bathroom as before, but giving him a little wave this time.

Bundling up what remained of their goody basket, they reluctantly left the splendour of the hotel room, and made their way down in the lift and out the building through the deserted reception. The TARDIS was parked a short distance away, and they entered it unnoticed.

"Are we likely to be called out by Jack's Torchwood again?" Donna asked the Doctor as he set the coordinates for the vortex and for them to dematerialise.

Having pushed the buttons, the Doctor stepped back from the console, "Probably. Why? Do you fancy helping them out in the future?"

"Oh, I think I could cope with more five-star luxury. How about you?" she sidled up to him, and let him slip his arm around her waist.

He looked down at her, smiling, "Sounds good to me! Tea?"

Donna answered with a nod, and they made their way to the kitchen in companionable silence, glad that everything was right in their world.

.

.