A/N: Hello again, my faithful readers. Sorry this hasn't been uploaded sooner; stupid school gets in my way. Just a small warning, I am taking classes that require my full attention some days, so I might not update as frequently as you like. My sincerest apologies, but kick back and enjoy the first chapter of Prepare for Complications!
Chapter One- I'm Back
"Welcome back, House," Wilson says as he greets House in the lobby of PPTH. House grunts, and keeps on limping towards the elevator. "Aw, did daddy not get any sleep last night?" House scowls and turns around to smack Wilson in the leg with his cane.
"Aw, is the big time oncologist in pain?" House turns around to press the elevator button. The elevator doors open and House gets on with Wilson in tow.
"What are you complaining about? Cuddy gave you 2 months off for paternity leave, that's not even a real thing."
"Sleeping with the boss does have it advantages; we talk about clinic hours after we have sex. You wouldn't believe how many hours I get away with!" Wilson rolls his eyes as the elevator arrives on their floor.
"So how is my favorite goddaughter?" House rolled his eyes; if he knew Wilson was going to be such a woman about it he never would have named him Emma's godfather.
"Wilson, you are such a middle aged woman. My two month old spawn does the same thing every day; eat, cry, poop and sleep. See you at lunch Wilson." Wilson nodded and House stepped into his own office.
"Good morning my minions, daddy's back!" Chase, Taub, Foreman and Thirteen all looked up at them with tiny smiles on their faces. "You guys are so happy to see me; did you find any interesting cases as a welcome back present?"
"No, Cuddy didn't tell us you were coming back today so we didn't bother to look," Taub said. House furrows his eyebrows in confusion.
"Cuddy didn't tell you? I thought she would want you guys to plan a surprise welcome back party for me." Foreman scoffs,
"House, you didn't get shot or anything, you just bribed Cuddy to give you two months off for some made up reason."
"Made up reason? Paternity leave is the time for me to bond with my new sprog and get some around the clock Cuddy lovin'. Speaking of which, it's time for my bondage session with a certain Dean of Medicine, feel free to come and join us." House left his office, traveled down to Cuddy's office and barged through her office door without so much as a glance towards Kim, Wilson's girlfriend of three months.
"Good morning Breasty McAss." Cuddy glanced up from her paperwork and handed House a patient file.
"And good morning to you too, Drunken McBastard. 25 year old female presenting with seizures ER ruled out all likely causes."
"That's what the ER always says; I think they are just too damn lazy to do their job."
"Wow, that sounds like someone I know, I just can't place it…Wilson maybe?" House smirked; he was starting to rub off on Cuddy.
"Touché, since you wore my favorite shirt today, I will take the case." Cuddy rolled her eyes, and left Cuddy's office returning to his own office.
"Twenty five year old female with seizures," House spoke to his team as he walked into his office and dropped the pile of charts on the table. The team each grabbed a folder and perused the file.
"Could be alcohol withdrawal," Chase suggested.
"No, urine sample was clean, what about a medication reaction?" Foreman asked, Thirteen leaned into Foreman to look at the chart which didn't go unnoticed by House.
"Good, Foreman and bisexual go check the patient's home and Taub run blood cultures for brain infections. I'm taking my lunch early." House walked down to the cafeteria and snuck behind Wilson to grab his chips.
"Damn, I thought I could finally eat a meal without you trying to steal something." House smirked and sat down with Wilson in a booth.
"I follow the Wilson scent of loneliness and I have some juicy gossip for you to sink your teeth into." House watched Wilson's face light up with the potential of having PPTH's new story.
"Foreman and Thirteen have finally shacked up." Wilson's jaw dropped and his mind ran through possible scenarios on how to break the news.
"Before I spread this information around, what clued you in?"
"First, we were going over potential diagnoses and Thirteen leaned into Foreman to look over the patient history when she could've picked up her own folder. Second, when I made them search the patient's home neither one of them objected or tried to swap tasks, they just did it." A look of disappointment flashed across Wilson's face.
"That's all the proof you have? Maybe Foreman and Thirteen didn't argue with you because you were in a good mood. Or unlike you, they actually listen to authoritative figures instead of bargain and argue with them." House grabbed his chest in mock hurt,
"Wilson, are you crazy, when have I ever been wrong about something? Plus, Foreman has always argued with me before, why stop now?" Wilson shrugged, House did have a point, and Foreman has always been the one to put a stop to House's madness. That's probably why House has kept him around for so long; he uses Foreman as the voice of reason on the team. Wilson thought to himself.
"So how are you and Kate?" Wilson nearly spit out his drink, sure House got the name wrong but, when has he ever asked about his relationships?
"Great," House cut in, "sorry to cut this gossip session short, but I have to go pretend to do my clinic hours now, wouldn't want the boss to get pissed off."
"Since when do you care about irritating Cuddy?" House rolled his eyes,
"Since she became the person I have sex with. It's simple, keep the boss happy and someone gets happy later on." House said in a "duh" tone, and left for the clinic.
Around five pm that day, House walked down to Cuddy's office relishing in the fact that he just solved his latest case. Chagas disease, who would have thought of that, ME! House gleefully thought to himself. House did a half nod to Kim and walked into Cuddy's office.
"You ready to go home early and cut the evil spawn watcher loose?" Cuddy scowled,
"Marina is a great nanny, plus she has only been watching Emma for one day, you can't possibly know she's evil."
"Whatever, you ready to go?" Cuddy nodded and walked out with House guiding her by his hand on the small of her back.
Ten minutes later Cuddy and House arrived at their home and relieved the nanny.
"Hey sweetie did you miss me?" Cuddy cooed to Emma who gurgled in response. House grabbed Emma to change her and Cuddy started dinner. From the nursery, House heard a knock on the door.
"LISA CAN YOU GET THAT, THE SPAWN LEFT A HUGE SURPRISE FOR ME!" House yelled from inside the nursery. Cuddy smirked at the sudden shift in their relationship now that they are home with their daughter.
"YEAH GREG I GOT IT" Cuddy yelled, and went to open the door, shocked to see who was at the other end.
A/N 2: Sorry for the lame cliffhanger, I didn't know how to end this chapter. Please read and review with your comments, concerns, etc. Reviews equal new chapters with faster updates people!