This is just a random daydream I had while trying to focus on a review packet we were supposed to work on in math. For some reason, I always get inspiration when I'm supposed to be doing something other than daydreaming. (I'd love to know the reason, but unfortunately my daydreaming half isn't giving me any answers)
For the longest time, I've wondered what exactly happened between the two episodes of Aftershock. (For those of you who don't remember, the scene where Terra basically 'killed off' the Titans? Ring any bells?) Anyway, I started thinking about how Beast Boy came to be who he was. I find it somewhat ironic that the only reason he became a Teen Titan was because of his 'rare illness' when he was younger and the fact that the cure turned him green and gave him morphing powers. It sort of evolved from there while I was writing it, considering my obsession with BBXRae stuff… Oh, and it's a one-shot! And the title is extremely cheesy and unoriginal… oh well.
Reviews are appreciated, including flames so long as they aren't too rude, but I'd really prefer constructive criticism. And this story is too short to require a summary. Just read the thing, its short enough! :D On the other hand, this very well may be the longest author's note yet that hasn't included replies to reviewers. At least it's the longest one I've ever written.
Disclaimer: I definitely own them because I'm SO old enough to have created Teen Titans. *note sarcasm*. Seriously, the comic was made in the 1980's. You really think I own it?
RascalKat productions proudly presents…
Besides. I've Got You.
"Cyborg? Cyborg, where are you? Cyborg!" Beast Boy called into the inky blackness of the underground tunnel. He bit his lip as the echo came back to him. Why did I have to trust her? How could she do this to me? To us? She almost buried Cyborg and me. I don't even want to know what she did to the others. Especially not Raven. She hated Raven most of all, at least she seemed to. I don't even want to think about what she might have done to Raven. Beast Boy felt his stomach wring itself out in a sudden wave of anxiety. What if she… killed her?
He sucked in a breath of air, trying not to focus on that possibility. "RAVEN?" he called, on the off-chance that she happened to be in the same tunnel as him, which wasn't likely. He started running, fear and concern nipping at his heels. Most people wouldn't be able to see in such darkness, but Beast Boy wasn't most people. Along with the ability to morph into different animals came the ability to see better than most humans in the dark.
Drawing in lungfuls of the cold dank air, he ran fast as he could, searching for something, anything, that might show him where one of his teammates was. Within another few minutes, he'd come to a fork in the tunnel. All of his training in the Doom Patrol came back to him, and he licked a finger and held it in front of each tunnel. He could feel the slightest of air currents in the second tunnel. His mind made up, he started to run again, when a noise made him freeze in place. He could hear somebody breathing in the first tunnel. His pulse spiked as a possibility struck him.
"…Raven? Is that you?"
There was no reply, but Beast Boy was not deterred, and he walked into the first tunnel all the same. Even the slightest chance to find somebody down here was better than nothing. He kept his pace slow so that he could scan every inch. About thirty feet in, one of the piles of dirt moved.
Beast Boy's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. "Raven!" he exclaimed. She was covered in dried mud, so well camouflaged that he probably wouldn't have even seen her had she not moved. She was sitting with her back up against the side of the tunnel, indian-style, one hand propping her head up. She hardly made a move to show that she even knew he was there.
"Raven? Is something wrong?" He asked, stepping over to her quietly. He reached his hand out slightly, about to touch her shoulder when she suddenly turned to punch a rough chunk of granite in the wall behind her. She brought her knees up to her chest and buried her head in her arms, leaning one shoulder on the wall.
"Are you okay? Raven, what did Terra do to you?" He asked urgently, bending down to sit next to her. "Why are you covered in mud?"
Raven didn't answer, instead taking a deep, calming breath. Well, it would have been calming had it not been so ragged, almost like she had asthma. She tried to take another breath, but it was cut off by a sudden coughing fit.
Beast Boy could hardly remember ever hearing someone cough that hard. He moved out of the way as she struggled to get onto her hands and knees, continuing to gasp for breath between coughs. After a few seconds, he realized that Raven was coughing up mud.
Beast Boy looked around frantically, wondering whether there was something he could do to help. Maybe a glass of water? Stupid, there's no water down here. All he could do was look on helplessly as she tried to rid her lungs of the sludge.
After what seemed like forever, Raven laid down on her back, chest and throat burning, eyes watering. She swallowed and cleared her throat a few times. When she finally spoke, her voice was raw and raspy, even more so than usual. "Are the others okay?"
"I don't know, I've only found you. You need to tell me what Terra did to you!" he said, realizing that he was starting to sound like Robin.
Raven took another breath before she responded, her eyes glittering dangerously under her dirt-crusted lashes. "She drowned me in mud." She stood up and walked to the other side of the tunnel. "Why did I have to trust her? Why. Didn't. I. Listen!" she screeched, accentuating her words with well-placed punches to the wall with hands circled in black energy. The sound of each impact echoed through the tunnels, but she stopped punching immediately as she started coughing again, sinking to her knees and attempting yet again to clear the dirt from her windpipe. This coughing fit didn't last as long and as soon as it was over, she was up on her knees, punching the wall again without a sound as her fists beat against the rock with sickening cracks.
"Raven? Raven, stop!" he shouted. He could feel the earth beneath his feet vibrating with each punch. If she did enough damage to the wall, it could cave in on top of them. That and she just might hurt herself. He walked up to her, putting his hands on her shoulders, wishing he knew how to calm her down.
Surprisingly, nothing was exploding around them. Apparently punching a wall was enough of an emotional release to keep Raven's powers in check. As her punches slowed and decreased in power, she started breathing heavily, but at least it didn't sound as ragged as before.
She let out one last long sigh a few minutes later, then crumpled all the way down to the ground, turning so that her back was once again up against the side of the tunnel.
"Would you like to tell me more of what happened now?" Beast Boy asked.
"Well, I defeated Overload. Then Terra showed up and mixed dirt into the water I'd used to defeat him. I called her a traitor, and…"
"She… called you a witch, didn't she?" Beast Boy knew how much that particular taunt hurt her. It stung more than most people realized because sometimes that was how she really viewed herself; as nothing more than a witch.
Raven nodded, pausing for a second, not really wanting to go on. Terra had exploited her, used her own rage against her. She didn't really feel like saying anything about that.
If no one else knew that Raven had actually started to trust Terra, maybe she could start to believe it herself. She wanted to believe it, wanted to more than anything. She wanted to be able to say that she'd listened to her heart's unease from the moment she first saw Terra, even though she knew she hadn't. The truth was, she had never been quite sure of whether to trust Terra or not, and it was especially difficult to decide when Raven might have been shunning her for no reason except a false notion that Terra was evil. What kind of person would she have been then? A horrible one, that's what.
No. I'm not going to say anything about actually trusting her.
That was when Raven remembered what she'd screamed as she'd attacked the wall. In her fury, she had admitted the secret that she'd hoped no one would ever come to know. So I guess it's too late to try to say I never trusted her anyway, she thought bitterly. "She exploited my weaknesses."
"How did she do that?" Beast Boy asked, a knot of disquiet growing in his stomach at hearing that Terra had used Raven's weakness against her. After all, it had been Beast Boy that had shared all of the Titans' weaknesses with Terra in the first place. By now he was mentally kicking himself for falling for Terra, wishing he hadn't been won over by her beautiful eyes, her charming smile, the fact that she actually laughed at his jokes… Beast Boy shook his head to clear away his thoughts as Raven answered.
"She figured me out, Beast Boy."
"What do you mean by that?"
"She figured me out. She started asking me what stung the most. That she tricked me, nearly wiped out the Teen Titans, that everyone liked her so much better than me…" Raven paused again. She was pretty sure this was more than she'd ever said to anyone about her feelings. It wasn't a topic she really liked to discuss. It made her feel vulnerable. Unprotected. No turning back now, she thought to herself. "Or the fact that I actually believed she was my friend." She curled her hand into a fist, trying not to let the old anger force its way out again.
"Which was it?" Beast Boy asked, somewhat shocked that Raven had actually opened up to him. He half expected her to stand up and walk away right now, leaving this conversation in the dust.
As Beast Boy had predicted, Raven didn't answer immediately, but she did answer. She grabbed a small piece of clay off of the dirt floor and rolled it between her thumb and forefinger slowly, pursing her lips. "All of them." She replied quietly, crushing the sphere of clay that she'd made before chucking it into the darkness.
"She'd pegged me perfectly, and although part of me was mad at her for turning on us, the other half was mad that she had actually figured me out." Raven said. "I was just so mad. At her, at myself… She asked me who was in control now, which only made it worse. She used my anger to make me weak! And then she just… finished me. She dragged me under."
Raven leaned her head up against the cold stone wall, closing her eyes, probably trying to forget what had happened next. Beast Boy watched her, knowing just how scared she must have been. Drowning in water was one thing. Drowning in mud was about ten times worse. He didn't even want to imagine feeling so completely helpless. It was horrible.
"I know how it feels Raven." Beast Boy said, not exactly sure what to say, but saying it anyway. "Well, not the drowning part, but I understand the rest. She betrayed me too."
Immediately, Raven felt guilty. She'd just spent all this time talking about herself when it was so obvious that he was hurting just as bad, if not worse. She narrowed her eyes, wishing she'd never even started talking about Terra. See? This is what happens when you let people in. It's not worth it Raven, and now Beast Boy's hurt because of you. How could you be so selfish? She thought, scolding herself.
"Oh, Beast Boy. I… I… I'm sorry." Great. You've hurt him, and that's the best comeback you've got? Idiot. Well, are you going to just sit there? Do what any good friend would do and give him a hug. And I mean a real hug. Not those 'I-might-as-well-be-a-rock-so-just-hug-me-as-best-you-can' hugs. She raised her arm tentatively and put it around his shoulders. "I'm sorry Beast Boy, this whole mess is my fault. If only I'd trusted my instincts… I could have saved everybody a lot of trouble."
Beast Boy stared at her, picking her arm up off his shoulder, putting it back at her side. After all that she'd been through, she was trying to comfort him? Suddenly Beast Boy felt guilty for making her feel sorry for him. She deserved the comfort that she was trying to give to Beast Boy, and he felt terrible for being so egocentric, so he said the only thing he could think to say.
"Raven, none of it was your fault! You have to believe that!" It was pretty obvious that Raven blamed herself for it. She had been the one who trusted Terra the least. She had been the last one to let her guard down. She had been their last chance to recognize Terra for the traitor she was. It was all true. But that didn't mean it was Raven's fault. "We all trusted her, not just you! Heck, I trusted her so much I was too blind to see that she wasn't who she really said she was. If it's anyone's fault, it's mine."
"Beast Boy, don't say that. I know it's my fault. You don't have to protect me from the blame that is rightfully mine. It was my fault." She mumbled the next sentence, not intending Beast Boy to hear, but considering how quiet it was, it wasn't hard to. "Especially after I paid so much attention to myself when it's so obvious you're worse off than I am."
"What? Raven, what are you talking about? I'll be fine!"
"No, Beast Boy, you're just saying that. You loved her, and she hurt you. She betrayed you." For a second, she felt kind of guilty for reminding him of it, but she didn't pay much attention to that. "You deserve to be comforted, not me."
"But… Raven… I have something to tell you. I never really loved her."
"Beast Boy, stop lying to me! I know you loved her, quit trying to brush it off like it's nothing!"
"Raven? I really didn't love her. I'll be fine."
"That doesn't mean it doesn't hurt though, whether you loved her or not."
"Yes, but I don't care about her."
"But I thought…" Raven stuttered.
"I'll be fine." Beast Boy repeated. "Besides. I've got you." With that, he pulled her into a hug. She stiffened up for a few seconds, then proceeded to hug him back tightly. Beast Boy found a way to look down at her face, and he grinned at what he saw. She had her eyes closed, and for once in her life, she was smiling, a soft blissful smile.
Well well well, it seems as if I've finished this one-shot… and it has absolutely no resemblance to my original idea! WOOHOO!
You see, I was going to have Raven talk about how she hated being so weak and all, and have Beast Boy tell her his life-story, about only becoming a Titan because he had a rare disease earlier in his life. So that from his weakness, came his strength. But, I was listening to my characters, and I figured that this is what Raven would say instead, and I must say, I like it a LOT better!
This was my first one-shot, so I hope you liked it! I'd love it if you were to review!
Wow, I'm pretty sure this is the longest thing I've ever written for Fanfiction…
If you want to read more of my stories, I've got another story going called 'Redemption Impossible'. It's only got two chapters so far, but I can tell it's going to be somewhat more difficult to write than I'm used to, so reviews for that story would also be a big help!
Hey, does anyone else find it funny that, for those of us who read Fanfiction, the "It's so fluffy" saying from Despicable me has a completely different meaning?
Thanks for reading!
Crud… Now I have to get out of my chair because I'm done writing this but I'm really sore from running and hiking through the stupid forest… Anyone want to help me up? Hmm? Anyone? Anyone at all… *lights shut off for the night* Okay, SERIOUSLY?