Zombified Vocals!
Part I

For some reason, even though it was the middle of October, there was a frosty chill in the air. The breeze rattled bones, and the looming trees cast shadows that seemed to stretch for miles. It was unnerving – even menacing. But, of course, when your soul purpose in life is to sing and have fun, you don't really notice those type of things. For Miku, there were much more important matters at hand, like where the heck did those twins hide her leeks.

"This isn't funny!" the green-hair girl shouted, nearly upturning a teal couch in her quest to find her favorite snack/thing of utmost importance. She heard annoying, mischievous little giggles coming from the other room. Miku whipped her head back, her normally happy-go-lucky face now in full pout mode. "Seriously, guys! They're gonna be all dirty now, thanks to you!"

Two heads poked around the corner, green eyes sparkling. "Sorry, Miku," Rin said, grinning like the Cheshire cat. "But, no can do! Len is the one who knows the secret." She looked at her brother, and they shared a laugh.

"Yup, and my lips are sealed," Len agreed. "There's no we're gonna tell you, Mi—kuuuuuu—!"

Miku, as you may or may not know, was a bit of a rough girl when she wanted to be. And nobodygot in between her and her leeks. She had stalked over, grabbed Len by the throat, and held him up to the sky. "Where. Are. The. Leeks?" she growled, eyes narrowing into hard little slits as her grip tightened and tighened.

Rin was laughing her butt off, while Len was fretting for his life. "F-f-f-fridge," he finally managed after several strangled choking sounds. Miku nodded her head, dropped him to the ground, and all-but-skipped out of the cozy living room.

Somebody bumped into her on her way out. "Oh, Miku," Kaito, the blue-haired pretty boy, greeted. Meiko, clad in a beautiful red attire, was right next to him. "Did you find your leeks?" He knew what happened when Miku didn't have her leeks. Oh God, he didn't want to relive that moment. It was almost as scarring as all those times he had to sing about raping her – Miku, apparently, didn't like that. No, not at all.

Miku nodded her head, grinning like her usually happy self. "Yup, they're in the fridge~!" She bowed to Meiko, then tilted her head to the side. "Umm, where's Luka and Gakupo? They're supposed to be here." She glanced behind the duo, but all that was there was a long, winding hallway.

Meiko and Kaito simultaneously shrugged. "Haven't seen 'em," Meiko said bluntly, twirling a lock of short brown hair around her finger. "Ugh, I hope they don't show up. Luka's fine, but that Gakupo character gives me the creeps. Thank God I don't have many duets with the guy." Kaito tensed up beside her, and she snorted in sadistic amusement. "Kaito here, on the other hand..."

Miku stopped her before she could begin. "I don't want to hear it right now," she said, frowning with a little triangle shape. "Gakupo's a main member of the crew – he should be invited to all these special occasions. Don't you agree, guys?" She raised her lovely voice so the twins could hear her.

"Sure~."

"M-my poor throat...!"

"See? They agree with me." Miku crossed her arms, her gray sleeves rustling as they rubbed against one another. "Now, if you excuse me, I'm going to go rescue my poor leeks." She strode off down the hallway, her skirt and hair swaying in rhythm to her pace.

On that day, Miku (who claimed to be the leader of the Vocaloids) had arranged for six of the most well-known singers in the land to visit her giant, tilted, teal-and-gray tinted house. They hadn't really done anything spectacular lately, and people were getting bored. Miku was planning to unveil a grand project – they were going to perform a medley of all of their greatest hits, and sing it live. And dance. Yes, dancing was fun. And, to do that, they had to have everybody who was going to appear on the playlist: Len, Rin, Kaito, Meiko, Luka, Gakupo, and Miku herself. Miku figured that if she invited anybody else, it would be a madhouse. Seven should be quiet enough.

...Of course, when all of them were "colorful" professional singers, things were never, how you say, "quiet."

Soon enough, Miku reached the fridge. Her face lit up dramatically, and quickly proceeding to raid its contents, throwing numerous bananas, oranges, and beer bottles out of the way and onto the tile in order to reach her precious treasure – the mighty leek. She squealed in delight, rubbing the vegetable to her face.

She barely recognized the ring of the doorbell, she was so overcome with glee. "I'll get it," Kaito said loud enough for all the visitors to hear, and the sound of his footsteps echoed throughout the halls.

When he opened the door, there was a trademark screech that made all of their ears bleed whenever they heard it, along with a loud thump and girly yelp. "Thousands of them!" And, for once, it was comprehensible. Miku quirked an eyebrow, sighed, and made her way to the main room.

She was greeted with the sight of Gakupo on top of Kaito (which wasn't that uncommon, unfortunately for Kaito), both of them squirming in awkward agony, trying to get up. Luka also stood at the doorway, a pale hand to her forehead in shame.

"G-g-get him off of me!" Kaito cried meekly. The Kagamine twins and Meiko appeared out of another random hallway. Meiko raised an eyebrow, while Rin and Len shot each other a I-guess-all-those-covers-of-Magnet-finally-went-to-their-head look (which was quite a common look in the Hatsune household).

Gakupo managed to stand up, brushing off his long white gown, complete with designs of blue and purple. "It was awful," he said, putting a well-groomed hand to his face. "I have never seen anything more devastating before in my life!" He looked at Luka helplessly. "Oh, you felt that awful evil creep inside of you, too, didn't you?"

Miku and Luka exchanged glances. "We came across a parade of dancers marching across the streets," Luka stated matter-of-factly.

There was an unanimous "oh," save for the purple-haired samurai wannabe himself.

"Awful dancers," Gakupo added. He shivered, recalling the terrible memory. "I wanted to show them how it's really done, but Miss Megurine stopped me."

"Of course! I don't want to be publicly seen with some flamboyant dancing samurai!" If she were talking about anything else, those combination of words would've been really freaking weird. But, this was Gakupo she was talking about.

"Okay, okay," Miku butt in, her brow creasing. "Let's just get down to business, shall we? We can play later." She chewed on the tip of her leek as she turned, facing yet another hallway. The house was ridiculous in that respect – if you turned half an inch, you'd be met with either a staircase or corridor. "Follow me, everyone~!"

The six grunted, sluggishly following the hyper singer. They came to a stop in a lounge area, decorated with rainbow wallpaper, a single multicolored couch, and a teal chair. Miku quickly plopped down in the chair, and the other six were left to stare stupidly at the couch.

"What are you waiting for?" Miku asked innocently. "Go on, sit down! There's plenty of room." She gestured to the couch.

Rin and Len were the first to actually sit. Pretty soon, almost all of them were sitting tightly against one another, irritation and embarrassment stinging their faces. It was already getting really hot in that little room.

"All settled? Good. Well, I have something big planned." Miku coughed into her fist. "Alrighty, my plan is to—"

"I'm squished..." Len interrupted, voice small. Indeed – he was leaning into Rin, while Luka was at his other side, pressed up against him, for Gakupo was taking turns between squishing her and Kaito, inwardly debating on who he liked more. Meiko had made the wise decision to stand.

Miku sent him a fiery glare. "Be quiet and let me finish!" she said hotly. Len nodded his head quickly, although he was still being absorbed by the cushions and the two woman beside him (although, he had to admit – it wasn't that bad being in a middle of a sandwich of two women). "As I was saying—"

And then the sound of knocking rung throughout the house. Miku's leek snapped in two, the crack rebounding off the walls in a passive kind of anger. The group on the couch "eeped" in fright. "...I'm not getting that," she said finally.

The other Vocaloids all looked at each other. "I got it last time," Kaito said, face stubborn. "I think Gakupo should do it."

"Seconded." That was Luka, who also didn't want to get up. The front door was a mile away. Rin and Len nodded their heads.

Gakupo's brow furrowed. "I think you should do it again, Kaito," he said, voice lowering with every word until it was a mere purr. Kaito turned his head away, already knowing what was coming.

"I will not," he said. "Aren't you always going on about how you're a samurai? A samurai should man up and get the door for his fellow warriors..."

Gakupo's eyes gleamed, before giving a quick squeeze to the inside of Kaito's thigh. The blue-hair boy stood up immediately, his expression an unreadable combination of annoyed, embarrassed, and homicidal.

"I'll get the door."

And in an instant, he was gone.

It was silent again in that hot little room. Meiko cast her brown eyes onto each person, before finally speaking up. "Well, I'm going with him," she announced. Her gaze darkened. "You should come with. I think that would be wise."

There was a thick layer of awkwardness and fear in the room, even after she strolled out and away. Meiko was just as deadly as Miku when aggravated – she had destroyed several objects (and several of Kaito's bones) on several occasions... although, during all of those times, she was drunk. But that didn't really matter. In one group effort, everybody got up and shuffled out into the hallway once again (it was amazing they didn't get lost).

They arrived just in time to see Kaito open the door. "Oh? Gumi? What are you doing here?" He cocked his head at the green-haired girl in the yellow tutu.

She stood there for a moment, emerald eyes clouded and her body slightly lopsided. Her mouth hung open, almost as if in a permanent state of shock.

"LaaAAAAaa~"

The off-key note hurt all of their ears, like daggers at midnight. Kaito covered his and stepped back, wincing in pain. Gumi herself staggered forward, still releasing that awful note.

"What are you doing?" Miku cried over the loud ringing. "Stop, stop, stop! I'm sorry for not inviting you – if you be quiet, we'll let you in on the medley, okay?" This didn't trigger a response. All she did was continue to advance on Kaito.

Miku glanced around at her group. Meiko seemed unfazed, although she was covering her ears. The twins were clinging onto one another, Luka was positively petrified, and Gakupo looked worried beyond belief, staring down at the scene with wide purple eyes. "Gakupo!"

"Eh?" He turned to her, blinking once or twice in shock. "Wh-what is it, Miss Hatsune?"

Miku pointed needlessly dramatically to the scene. "Do something! Kaito's in danger!" She put on the most helpless face she could manage. "Please, great samurai! You must help the weak!"

There was a long pause as Gakupo's face scrunched in concentration and thought. "Help the weak... great samurai..." He repeated this over and over, letting the words roll off his tongue. Finally, his hands went to the sword at his waist. "You're right, I must save him!" In a flash of white and violet, he ran over to the two (a bit awkwardly for a samurai – must be because of that frilly gown), drawing his sword and wearing a look of determination.

"Halt!" he commanded, stepping in front of Kaito defensively. Gumi, however, did not 'halt' – she continued to limp forward. Gakupo tried again, raising his voice. "Step away! I do not wish to harm an innocent civilian, but if you try hurt this young man, I will personally send you to the deepest reaches of Hell!"

Gumi's infinite note became more of a groan. She stopped for a moment, almost seeming to size him up. Suddenly, she lunged at Gakupo, mouth open and long fingernails digging themselves into his face. Gakupo was taken aback, not expecting this. He flailed around for a bit, trying to shove the girl off of him. He managed to throw her off, but not before her teeth sunk themselves into his shoulder, cutting through the fabric.

Releasing his clichéd samurai battle cry (which was almost as bad as the wailing note), Gakupo swung with his blade, becoming more graceful with every step. He landed a blow on Gumi's shoulder, which cut the limb off as if it had been loose for a while.

Luka, Rin, and Len screamed as the arm fell to the ground with a hideous splat. Kaito, Meiko, and Miku all gaped stupidly, trying to comprehend why Gumi just bit Gakupo, why Gakupo just severed Gumi's arm, and why Gumi didn't even appear to care that her limb was flailing on the ground.

Gumi let out that high-pitched noise again, proceeding to stalk closer. Gakupo's eyes widened, and he really didn't want to, but he had no choice. He struck a perfect blow to Gumi's head, and she tumbled to the ground.

She laid there, motionless, for what seemed like an eternity. Blood was gushing from the place where her arm was once attached and where the sword dented her skull, staining her hair and her once-lovely skirt. It began to smell awful – worse than the stench of Rin's oranges when they went bad.

It was quiet in that big, hot room, save for the sound of Gakupo's rapid breathing.

"...Guys," Len said quietly. They all turned to him blindly. He fiddled with his sleeve, fear still prominent of his face. He sucked in a deep breath, unsure of how to phrase the discovery that had just dawned on him.

"I think Gumi is a zombie."


A/N: lolwut.

Yeah. I've wanted to write a zombie apocalypse fic for a while… I was either going to write one for Puyo Puyo or Vocaloid, and after flipping a coin, I decided on the latter. Don't ask me why. I also noticed a lack of… silly Vocaloid fics, so this will be incredibly cracky (with that kind of SSB layout - they live in a magical, perfect land, all have big houses... yeah).

I think this is going to be in three to four parts, all leading up to Halloween. I'll be proud of myself if this is finished before the 31st lol.

Sorry for grammar issues/typos, and thanks for reading.