I had everything, I had an amazing job that I loved and handled at my own pace (usually), an extravagant home that was always clean and spotless, and a loving lover that shared my love unconditionally...

That was six months ago. Six months ago I had all of that, I loved every minute of it, I loved how I could come home from a meeting and the smell of strawberry meringue pie would overflow the apartment for two days at a time. I loved how all of my bears always had clean ribbons on them, and how my sheets smelled of jasmine tea and teenage pheromones. So, I wondered how the two years I spent with all of this bliss come falling apart in two minutes, how someone could take all of my happiness, all of my joy and love, within one hundred twenty seconds.

The house isn't as clean anymore, a thin layer of dust covers the coffee table and dining table and t.v., the windows are beginning to look smoggy, the fridge hasn't had fresh food in months, dirty dishes have piled up on the counter. The phone rings, I let the answering machine pick it up, the end of my cigarette falls off into the ash tray, "Usami-san," my father hired a detective, his voice echoes through the apartment, "I have great news, we've got a lead on where Misaki is. I can't say much about the rest of it, but we think that there are others that have been abducted by the same man. Call me if you want to know about anything," the click of the machine and flashing light let me know that it's waiting for me to erase it.

I remain where I am, I don't want to move, I don't to breath, not until I know Misaki is home, until I can feel him in my arms. My heart churns in my chest, I'm surprised it hasn't stopped at this point, I look around, all the memories come flooding back, I feel so numb...I remember how we first met, when we first fought, when we first made love. It used to make me cry, it used to overwhelm to to the point of insanity, but now all it does is numb me more than the nicotine has.

Pictures are scattered on the table, the ones of us on vacation, the one Isaka took of us at the office, and several random ones we managed to make over the years. I pick one up of our first Christmas morning together, the snow had prevented him from going to Osaka and me from going to an emergency meeting, we ended up spending that night curled up on the couch with hot chocolate and a cheesy Christmas movie. That morning had been beautiful, we woke up on the couch, a blanket covering us, we could see the outside and how the light snow was falling so lightly that we could barely make it out through the sun. We had gotten each other presents for when we would come back, we settled on two each, the presents he had gotten me where one big and one small. The big one was a large box wrapped in red foil and a blue ribbon, inside was a hand stitched bear made of satin and filled with plush beads, the ribbon on it was a new silky pale purple tie. The other present was smaller, it was wrapped in navy blue and had a purple ribbon taped on the top, inside was a ring, sterling silver with the words 'I love you' engraved inside.

I had gotten him a square silver necklace, it was a locket so it had both of our pictures on the inside, his face had turned a bright shade of red and tears had formed in his eyes, but I remember the warmest smile spreading across his face. I don't remember the other present, he was so engrossed in his locket that he didn't want to look at the other one, he said that he didn't want to cry from this much happiness, if he did his heart would break.

That feels like decades ago, like my bones had worn into an old man's and I'm reminiscing from my youth. I look at the clock, it's been almost eight hours, time is slipping by me so quickly, too quickly, I wonder what would happen if I never moved from this spot again. I wonder what would happen if I just sat here and thought about all the happy memories I had with the one person who made me the happiest.

The phone rings again, the answering machine takes it again, "Usami-san," the detective, "I have amazing news, we've found Misaki and the others!" I jerk my head up, he can't be serious, after all this time..."We haven't caught the man yet, but...there is more bad news I'm afraid. You see the man we found to be the kidnapper...he's a scientist...the victims...including Misaki, well...they were his lab rats...Misaki is alive and well, but...I won't lie to you, he's different than from when you last saw him...that's putting it lightly. He's here at the hospital, the one just across from the police department. I'll let Takahiro know as well." Already I'm on my feet, hurrying to the door, "He's strong, I'll tell you that, he's even asking for you."

I slam the door, my mind racing and heart hammering, I don't care what the message said all I know is that my beautiful loving Misaki is alive, he's alive, he's alive.