By: Cythia Carson
Rape is forced, unwanted sexual intercourse. Rape is about power, not sex. I had enough; never again will I ever give him the power...never...but yet ...he's still here.
I looked into my bathroom mirror and I had to wonder, what went wrong. I used to be a happy girl but looking myself in the mirror I knew I would never be that girl again. I was filthy; I was no longer a girl. I didn't deserve that title, of a girl, I was tainted, used. I let a tear fall from my eye as he knocked on the bathroom door.
"Come on Bella, I was just having fun. I never thought you would freak," I didn't respond, "I'm sorry, hun. I didn't know you were still a virgin," again I didn't respond, "Fucking God Bella; you know you are acting like a fucking bitch right now. And if you don't come out this second, I will fucking knock down this door and wake you grandparents."
That was my first mistake, opening the door.
"There, that's a good girl Bella. Now come here and let me see your hip."
That was my second mistake, letting him touch me again.
"Now shh, you don't want to wake up your grandparents now do you honey?" He was pressing a hot wire on my hip in the shape of a E. It burned so fucking much but if I let out one scream of pain, my grandparents would be down here in a flash to see their granddaughter being pressed down into her bed with the boy from next door branding her, " That's right. Now you're mine forever and ever. And don't you ever fucking forget that, so if I see as so much as talk to another boy about what happened tonight...let's just say that he won't be breathing for long"
And that was my last mistake, letting him control me even though he left.
So now, I walk down this lonely road with his cold green eyes watching my every step. I stuck inside my head and I fear that the only way away from him is disappearing into the valley of death.
This was all based on a true story, actually it was based on my story. But this, this is all gone now because I had the loving support and guidance form many off my friends. Thank you guys so much for being there for me through it all.