So. This is my first story, and I'm really sorry if it sucks. But I promise it'll get better. I appreciate reviews, they make me uber happy, so click that button for me? That'd be great. Anywho. Here it is:
Edward leaned against a tree and stared at me, his expression unreadable.
"Okay, let's talk," I said. It sounded braver than it felt.
He took a deep breath.
"Bella, we're leaving."
"Why now? Another year-"
"Bella it's time. How much longer could we stay in Forks, after all? Carlisle can barely pass for thirty, and he's claiming thirty-three now. We'd have to start over soon regardless."
His cold stare confused me. I stared at him, trying to understand what he meant.
With a roll of nausea, I realized I'd misunderstood.
"I don't have to be able to read your mind to understand what you're thinking Bella. You can't come with us."
"But Edward I lo…"
"I don't want you Bella."
With my heart beating like a hammer, his indifferent eyes froze- like the liquid gold had frozen into bricks.
"You're not good enough for me anymore Bella."
He spoke the words slowly and precisely, his cold eyes on my face, watching as I absorbed the acidic words that slowly burned me alive.
"Well, that changes things." I was surprised by how calm and reasonable my voice sounded, when I felt anything but calm. Emotions of rage, pain, and betrayal plagued my entire being. I couldn't comprehend why he couldn't just break it off with me.
Confusion flashed across his eyes before he masked it and continued, "I'll always love you in a way, but I'm not human, Bella. I'm sorry for leading you on. But you're strong. You'll move on, and live happily. For Charlie."
"Goodbye Bella, I'm not too sorry to say that you were nothing more than a distraction, a human pet to distract me for awhile. I'm also sorry I found you intriguing, but you did get boring after awhile."
How lame could he get? Did I seriously just think that about Edward? I internally slapped myself.
"What about your memories of us?" The question flew out of my mouth before I could stop it.
"I'll always remember, but there are ways to distract myself. Your memory is more than a sieve, you'll forget in time. But Bella, I'm wasting my time pretending to be something I'm not. You're wasting my time."
Before I could react to the gentle kiss he planted on my head and his whispered goodbye, he was gone. Disappearing with the wind, and taking my heart with him.
Love, life, meaning. . .over.
Days. Weeks. Months passed.
Still he hadn't returned.
I thought our love was stronger than that. I knew it was. Though somehow my mind knew that fateful day in the forest was the last of Edward Cullen I'd ever see, my heart refused to accept it.
The only time I really felt alive was when my fingers played music. I taught myself piano and guitar, and that was about as much therapy I accepted. My own compositions were all about the cruelties life brings us, and how karma loves to kick our ass and laugh in our faces.
None of them were ever about love.
Edward destroyed me that day in the forest. I felt pathetic.
Rationally, I knew I sounded so stupid to sit waiting for the vampire that would never return, but I was so in love, no matter how wrong it was.
Looking back, I knew our love wasn't the strongest in the world, but I guess my heart convinced my mind otherwise.
Jacob Black. Eventually out fates intertwined, and I came upon the realization that he was a werewolf. This was after he tried to break me like He did and ignored me because it was "too dangerous". That was just another bump in the road we had overcome. He had healed me, if only infinitesimally. He was my lifeline and best friend all rolled into one. After a small run in with the new girl in town, Addison Daniels, that all changed.
He imprinted, and I lost him forever as well. I had told him I was in love with him a week before he met Addison. I knew I shouldn't have set my heart up for failure again, but he was just there. He was Jake, no variations, no exceptions. It was impossible not to fall in love again. I haven't spoken with Jake in three months. It hurt me to know he wouldn't want me anymore, so in order to keep myself from more inner turmoil, I completely cut him and the pack out of my life.
Pretty soon I realized there was no one left to lose.
The only solution was get up and leave the dreary town I once called home.
Once the decision to leave crossed my mind, I was relentless. It wasn't until I was on the plane to California did I let up.
I left everything, everyone. I began a new start. A new life. A new beginning.
I uprooted myself from dreary, rainy Forks, to sunny, pleasant California. I chose California because it was the most random place I could think of. They wouldn't ever show up there, and if Jake ever decided I was important to him again, he would never even think about California. Was I running from my problems? Hell yeah. But I couldn't feel guilty about it. Charlie would've understood. He would've accepted it gratefully if that red headed bitch Victoria hadn't killed him in front of me.
I came home from school one day to find my house in shambles. Doors were unhinged, and Charlie's door to the police cruiser was mangled far beyond repair. A trail of red led from the car, all the way up to his bedroom, were he was gruesomely murdered. The details are blurry, considering my vision was marred by the tears that were streaming down my face. I couldn't recall exactly how she killed my father, but I do know she literally ripped his heart out his chest.
I died so much more inside that day.
No sane person should've had to see their father's death that way.
I begged her to do the same for me. She considered it too, but saw how much the pain of Charlie's death brought me, and decided against it. Her sadistic need to see me in pain, to see me suffer the way she did when James died was enough to override her lust for my blood.
I was about to purposefully spill my blood in front of her when Jake and the rest of the pack showed up. Her body created a thick column of purple smoke in my backyard.
I admit, it was nice to see her ashes in my yard after she brutally murdered poor Charlie. I can only hope the wovles were merciless.
My flight to California was the very next day. Jake and the pack worried about me, so much that they never let me out of their sight. But it all became too much. I didn't need protection. People are supposed to live, then die. That's how it was supposed to go. No one knew that I sat on that plane, on my way to where there could be no vampires, therefore there can't be any werewolves that'll break my heart either. No one even knew California was my destination. It was better this way. California: a sunny, bright, place and the place in intended to escape to.
I hadn't finished my senior year yet, so I intended to finish it there. I refused to live with Renee. She could barely care for herself, and I didn't need to look after her. I needed to look after myself first.
It seemed like a selfish action at the time, but after a while I realized it was for the best.
I knew I wouldn't regret my decision to break off my ties with my former werewolf family, and this move would be good for me.
I wouldn't ever love again, I wouldn't get close to anyone, and I certainly wouldn't make any friends with these snotty Californian brats.
I would be alone, without my vampire love, or my werewolf who abandoned me when I needed him the most.
Sometimes things like this makes you believe that love is just a lie.
A/N: Tell me what you think?