This story was usually planned as one of the One-Shots for "SmutFest", but first I got so totally carried away with angst that it didn't quite make sense anymore to put some smut into it and second, I realized that for some reason I just can't write that specific couple having sex. I dunno why... I think they'd be more than hot together (I might be the only one thinking so, though), but yeah... my inspiration just did not want to give me anything more than pure angst and fluff... If anyone's willing to give it a try and write this pairing in something smutty, please, please, please do so :)

Pairing: Mike/Joe (Michael McGillicutty)

Warning: Angst, Fluff, Slash

Disclaimer: I own pretty much nothing but my perverted, sick and twisted mind... and some muses who fail at inspiring me as of late.


He did not just turn gay. In fact, no one did. Either you were born gay or you weren't. It was sheer impossible to "turn someone around". Though he sometimes wished, it would work, because there was no chance in hell that the man of his –endless, pleasurable, wet- dreams was into men, thus, it was impossible to ever belong to him.

How ironic that only a few weeks after that realization had hit him, that very same man of his dreams had confessed his feelings to him. From that day on until now –almost a whole year long- it had all been just that: a dream, an incredible, wonderful, heavenly dream. Not only the sex was mind-blowing but Mike was also the perfect boyfriend: loving, caring, understanding, treating him like a prince.

They were equals in every form and sense, in every aspect of their relationship. The day of their first official date, Mike had promised him to never lie, never cheat, to always be open to him, and that was what was bothering Joe right now. During his FCW stint and his participation at the second season of NXT, everything had been perfect, everything had been fine, but ever since he had appeared at HiaC two weeks ago, since he had told Mike he'd get a permanent role on Raw, it was all going downhill.

He had expected his lover to be happy for him, for them, had even expected him to jump into his arms out of pure joy –knowing how excited the sometimes hyperactive man could get- after all, they could finally spend more time together, could finally enjoy their time a lot more without having to rush, but all he had gotten had been a gruff pat on his shoulder and a "Congrats".

Since then they had barely talked, yet alone seen, and if Joe did not know better, he would suspect Mike to have an affair. However, that was out of possibility, all of their co-workers had denied just that when he had made his suspicions public, and he knew most of them well enough to read their expressions. They had not lied.

The arena was empty by now. Staff had left early after the show; the last co-worker had said his good-byes almost an hour ago. The only ones left were two security guards outside and him. They would have another show next night, another taping, so the equipment, the ring, the mats were still standing and he was thankful for it. The ring was the only place where he felt sane, were he could gather his thoughts, were he did not need to hide his true emotions.

Sitting on the top-turnbuckle, head in his hands –some old, ripped jeans and a white button-up shirt covering his sore body- he was lost in his thoughts, remembering the past 11 ½ months, replaying them in his mind, trying to find a reason for Mike's behavior, for breaking his promise. He could not come up with anything though, nothing that made sense at least.

Maybe it really had all been a dream. Maybe he had just imagined the love, the lust, the adoration in Mike's beautiful, sparkling eyes whenever he had looked at him, the passion and desire whenever they had made love. Could it be that he had been dumped without even realizing it?

So wrapped up in his thoughts, he hadn't even heard the security-door open and close, the careful, almost silent steps of the young man making his way down the rangs and towards the ring.

Was it possible that Mike had only played with him, that he had used him? Maybe the brunette had realized that guys really were not for him, but then again… why hadn't he just said something? Could it be that Mike had had enough of him, that for one reason or another, he had pushed Mike away? Impossible.

Shaking his head, he let out a growl of frustration, jumping off the turnbuckle. His eyes finally opened again when his feet hit the floor and they almost bulged out of his head when he came face to face, nose to nose, with the man he had least expected.

"Mike?" The young man had his hands shoved into the back pockets of his low-cut, black jeans, V-Shirt clinging tight to his tense muscles, hair gelled up into a stylish mess, his usually bright, warm blues filled with something Joe could not quite grasp. Remorse? Sorrow? Regret? "Hey."

The tension was almost unbearable, an awkward silence in the air as Mike's eyes stayed locked with his. The young brunette had told the securities he had forgotten something inside and it might take a while to find it. He had known that Joe was still there from what co-workers had reported him and he had been right as to where exactly to find him. They had often done it together after a show: stand in the empty ring, empty arena, hand in hand, eyes closed, taking in the sweet scent of success, just silently thanking god for the chance to live their dreams.

Mike had watched him for a good 10 minutes, contemplating on whether to talk to him or not, but he knew he owed it to Joe, an explanation, some sort of excuse. After all, he had promised it.

"What are you doing here?" The words were barely choked out, nothing more than a whisper, not only Joe's voice was trembling but his whole body was.

"I'm sorry… I… I owe you an explanation I guess." His usually calm, deep, confident voice was suddenly betraying him, shaky and nervous, words barely wanting to escape.

"You broke your promise." It was a fact, Joe's tone dripping with a mix of anger and disappointment as the brunette nodded slowly before lowering his head. "Why?" The question was inevitable, as was the answer that came next.

"I'm scared."

Joe's brows furrowed in confusion, lips tightly pressed together as he tried to decipher Mike's statement, regarding him intensely. Before he could ask more though, the brunette's head raised again, his eyes shimmering slightly with tears threatening to fall as he took a deep breath. "When you told me you'll get a permanent role on Raw, I got scared. It meant that we'd become more serious than were already were, that we'd be together more often, travel together, that you might even want to room with me… I've never felt anything as strong as I feel for you and it scared the shit out of me. So… I ran, I pushed you away, I ignored you… until tonight."

To say Joe was stunned would have been a clear understatement, eyes still fixed on his younger lover, his lips opening in preparation to say something, but nothing really wanted to come out. Mike knew he had fucked up and after having seen the empty look in Joe's eyes tonight, during the show; he had not been able to ignore him any longer. He had just missed him too much. "I just couldn't… you know… I miss you." "Why are you so scared?" Finally, his brain had managed to formulate some words, finally he was able to think again, their fingers unconsciously lacing while he waited for an answer. "Cause I don't want to lose you."

The expression on Joe's face was one of surprise, one of confusion, but soon enough turned into one of sheer amusement, as he could not hold back the laughter anymore. The younger brunette raised his head to finally meet the eyes of his lover again, brow arched, arms folded in front of his chest, frown forming on his lips. "I'm being serious, damnit." "I know… I know… but…" For some reason, Joe just could not stop laughing, his whole body shaking as he held his belly, already out of breath and as Mike stood there, completely perplex, watching the blond, those soft blue eyes sparkling, filled with tears of amusement, his frown slowly turned into a faint smile and then… he chimed in.

They stood like this for ages, just laughing, holding onto each other, every time one of them stopped, the laughter of the other one infected him again and they were back to shaking and gasping. Joe did not even know anymore why he had started laughing; just the serious look on Mike's face and those absolute ridiculous words coming out of those cock-sucking lips… so very unusual for his younger lover… it had set him off.

When he finally caught his breath again, the laughter subsiding, his nerves calming, he shook his head, wiping away the tears that had strolled down his face before taking a step closer towards the brunette and cupping his reddened cheeks in his strong palms, their faces mere inches away, noses almost touching, heart-warming smile meeting a slight frown. "You've got to be kidding me, right?" Before Mike could even open his mouth, a thumb was pressed to his lips and Joe sh'ed him. "Baby… I am living my dream. Not because I'm finally on the biggest show of them all, but because of you. You have absolutely no idea how much I've wanted you ever since I've laid eyes on you… and yeah, you can be annoying at times, you can be a cocky little brat, bitchy and whining and when you're hyper… god…" He rolled his eyes for better understanding. "… you're really driving me insane…" As Mike's eyes started to dwell up with tears, his lips started to tremble underneath his thumb, he was quick to add "But baby, I would not want it any other way. I love you… all of you, with every single twist, every single kink… that's you… that's the person I've fallen for."

Now the tears really fell, but more out of relief than for any other reason, Joe pulling away his thumb as Mike inhaled sharply, forcing a soft smile onto his lips, that same smile that took away Joe's breath every single time. "'m sorry." The murmur barely reached the blonde's ears, Mike's cheeks flushing in embarrassment over his outburst, over his doubts, his behavior, but Joe was anywhere from mad at him. A broad grin on his lips, he brushed them against the younger mans forehead, his hands now resting on lithe hips, thumbs kneading the taught flesh. "Don't be… I'm just as worried as you are, to be honest."

Mike drew back a little, regarding his lover questioningly, smacking his lips as he saw the sincerity in those pearly blues before the slightest of smirks appeared on his face. "Good to know I'm not the only idiot then." "Idiot, huh?" "Yeah… worrying over nothing, doubting ourselves, doubting us, totally stupid." "Yeah." "Definitely."

"So… where do we go from here?" Honestly, Mike did not know an answer to this, but he knew the best reaction. With a growing smirk, licking his plump lips, he gave the only answer that would loosen the tension, the only answer he knew Joe would want to hear, the only thing he really knew for sure. "Our bed."


Reviews? Pretty Please! *puppy-dog-eyes*