Title: U is for Unicorns (which don't exist)

Disclaimer: All belongs to the Great Kripke and his Team of Awesome.

Summary: Dean teaches Sam the ABC's, Winchester style.

Characters: Wee!Dean and Wee!Sam

Notes: plot bunny taken from livejournal. Many thanks to blackat-t7t. First time writing Wee!Chesters. Qualifications? None whatsoever… I have never taught a child their ABC's but I suspect this would be the way to do it :D Pardon my insufficiency at punctuation and the overuse of apostrophes.

Word Count: 2288

Dean flicks off the power on the TV and Sam looks at him, betrayed.

"No more cartoons for now," Dean announces and Sammy doesn't understand. Dean always lets him watch the singing chipmunks. Always. He knows they're his favorite. Sam's eyes water, his three-year-old emotions organizing for a good long fit at this tragedy, the perfect attack on this injustice. And then Dean holds up a notebook.

Curiosity strikes. "What's that?" Sam inquires, his distress momentarily forgotten.

Dean settles on the motel couch next to his brother. "We're gonna play a game."

A game? Sam likes games. A lot. The excitement practically beams off his face. Alvin who? Sam's going to Play a Game with his Brother.

"Listen Sammy," Dean begins, somber, the weight of his task heavy on his seven-year-old shoulders, "you're my responsibility. I'm your big brother and I know lots of stuff-"

Sammy nods; Dean is really smart. The smartest person Sam knows.

"-and you need to know stuff too."

Sammy wants to be smart like Dean.

"And you know how to walk and talk and stuff-"

Sammy puffs up proudly; he is the best walker/talker he knows.

"-but that's not enough. You're gonna need to read some day like me and dad-"

Dad is really smart too. But not smarter than Dean, Sam thinks.

"-and since you're my responsibility it means I got to teach you. Today I'm gonna teach you your ABC's."

Dean opens his notebook. On the first page are lines, two long ones that touch at the top and a short one going between them. Sam draws lines all the time; he's not impressed with this game yet. Dean has better games like Hide and Seek and wrestling… Sam isn't sure about this 'ABC' game.

"This is a letter. Letters put together make words," Dean explains. "This is the letter 'A' and 'A' is for angel."

Dean turns the page. On the other side is a picture of a stickman with two long… swirlies coming out of his back. "This is an angel," Dean says, pointing at his artwork. "See, he has wings."

Sam inspects his brother's stick-angel-man. It's a nice angel but…

"No clothes," Sam points out. He always puts clothes on his stick people. No one lets Sammy run around naked so why should his drawings? Dean looks sullen; his brother is missing the point.

"He doesn't need clothes, Sammy," Dean argues. "He's an angel."

Sam isn't persuaded. "He will get cold."

Dean huffs, conceding. "Fine, I'm sure angel's wear clothes."

"A coat too?" Sam always has to wear a coat in the winter. His coat is blue, his second favorite color.

"Yes, a coat too. A long one." Dean sighs, maybe this wasn't the best idea. "Do you want to learn the alphabet or not?"

Sam nods. He really does. He wants to be smart like Dean.

"Good." Dean points at the large and bulky 'A' he's drawn in his notebook. "'A' is for angel. Can you say that?"

"'A' is for angel." Sammy repeats.

Dean grins, delighted with both his brother and his own awesome teaching ability. "Good job Sammy! You know the first letter in the alphabet."

Sam smiles too. He likes doing a good job.

Dean turns the page again. This time it's a long stick with two bumps on it, one bump over the other.

"This is the letter 'B'. 'B' is for Bobby." Sam likes Bobby. Bobby has a big house with lots of places for Sam and Dean to play Hide and Seek. Bobby doesn't have good candy though. Its old and bitter and Sam would like Bobby better if he had good candy.

Dean traces out the letter on the page. "B is for Bobby." Sam repeats him, pleased that he's doing so well at this game.

The next page has a big round line. A circle with a missing piece. It looks like a big mouth. "C is for… cat's eye shells." From the coffee table Dean grabs a handful of pretty shells and hands them to Sam. They are smooth and shiny. He's seen them before, Dad has lots of them. "Cat's eye shells are for protection," Dean says, taking the pretty things back from his brother. Sam stares at them for a moment, shimmering in the sunlight, and remembers a night when his daddy put a few next to his bed, many hotels ago.

"This is a 'D'," Dean says, pointing to the backwards-looking 'C'. Then he points to himself. "'D' is for Dean." He grins and Sammy laughs. That letter will be an easy letter for Sam.

The next two letters are sharp again, like the 'A'. No rounded parts, just straight lines. 'E' and 'F'. Dean tells him "'E' is for ectoplasm," a word Sam is sure Dean just now made up and "'F' is for fire." Sam knows what fire is; he played with his father's matches once and burned his fingers. Dean is better with matches than Sam.

The next letter is very funny looking. It's the round C-looking letter again, but this time it has two small lines in it. Dean calls this one a 'G', "as in ghost."

Sam perks up at this. "Slimer?" He hopefully poses; he loves Slimer from TV.

Dean gives a half-hearted nod. "Kind of," he clarifies and looks like he wants to say more but doesn't.

'A' is back again and Sam calls it out, eager to show Dean how much he's learned. He is crestfallen when Dean shakes his head and tells him it was a good try. This uncoordinated cousin is actually an 'H'. Sammy carefully studies the shape so as not to be fooled again.

"'H' for Holy Water." Dean shakes the plastic container and Sam peers at it curiously. He's seen this before too.

"Special water?" He questions and Dean nods. Dad takes lots of special water with him when he leaves. Sam wonders what makes it special.

The page is turned and this time it's a tall line with a flat piece on top and bottom. "This is the letter 'I'," says Dean and his eyes light up. "'I' is for Impala."There's no picture on the other side but both boys know well the Impala. In their world of hotel to motel, city to town, the Impala is their constant. Dean says she's got to be a girl because she's the prettiest thing he's ever seen. She's big and shiny and when Dad drives her, she rumbles, like a big kitten.

"Impala." Sam says lovingly.

There's an almost-'I' on the next page. It loses its resolve at the end and become a curvy line, dipping like a soup ladle. Dean informs Sam this is a 'J'. "For John Winchester. Dad."

The next are 'K' and 'L' and 'M', which stand for Kansas and Lawrence and Mom: three things Dean remembers and Sammy doesn't. Dean turns the pages a little too quickly but Sam doesn't really notice.

'N' comes paired with a picture of a blond lady, smiling. Her name is Nicolette Sheridan. Sam tells Dean he thinks she's pretty. Dean winks. Sam tries to wink too but ends up just blinking both eyes.

The letter Sam mistakenly calls a circle is actually an 'O', which is a funny sounding letter to say. Dean says 'O' is for Ozzy but Sam doesn't know who that is. "Dad would end me if I told you," Dean warns as he flips the page.

The next letter looks like a 'B' without the bottom bump. "This is a letter 'P'. It's for Pastor Jim."

Sam also likes Pastor Jim. Pastor Jim lives in a big house with lots of chairs and colorful windows. Sam likes to stand under those windows and see the way it colors the sunlight. Sam has wondered why he needs all those long chairs; whenever they have visited Pastor Jim all the chairs have been empty. Dean says that Pastor Jim sometimes has a lot of people over and they sing songs and read books. Sam likes best the room downstairs with the toys, where he and Dean play while Dad and Pastor Jim talk.

Dean says that Pastor Jim lives with God but Sam has never seen him.

Dean traces the 'O'-looking letter with the piggy tail and laughs. "'Q' is for questions because you ask a lot of them." Sam doesn't laugh. He doesn't mean to ask too many questions.

The next letter is a 'P' kicking his foot. Sam tells Dean this and Dean laughs. Sam laughs too. "This is a letter 'R' for rosary," and Dean pulls one out of his pocket. It looks like a long necklace with a cross at the end. Sam doesn't have one but he knows it's just because he isn't old enough yet. Dean says that a rosary is for protection too. Sam tries to think of what a necklace could protect him from and his mind conjures only empty shadows. He will have to think about that when he's older too.

Dean goes to the next page. A bold curvy letter is on the paper. It looks like a snake. "This is the letter 'S'."

Sam knows this letter looks familiar.

"Do you know what 'S' stands for?" Dean prods, playful humor dancing in his green eyes. Sam thinks for a moment and then nods slowly. He thinks he knows.

"'S' is for… salt?" Dean tries and Sammy frowns and shakes his head. That's not right.

Dean goes for his second attempt. "'S' is for… sandwich?"

"No." Sam shakes his head again. Still not right.

Dean looks stumped but Sam can tell he's just playing. "What is it then, Sammy?"

Sam points into his own chest. "'S' for Sammy," he announces, matter-of-factly.

Dean looks unconvinced but he's holding down a wide smile. "If you say so. Still think it could be sandwich…"

The next letter looks like an 'I' and a 'J' but Sam has gotten good at this game. He's a professional. He knows not to be tricked. This new letter is a 'T' and Dean says it stands for TJ Hooker. Sometimes Sam watches the good police man catch the bad guys. He doesn't always understand what's going on but Dean likes it and Sam wants to like it too.

'U' looks like a big smile. Sam shows his best smile to Dean. "'U' is for unicorns which don't exist."

The letter after the big smile is like an upside down 'A'. "'V' is for vampires."

Dean has no picture for this word either. Sam learns it's because vampires don't exist either.

For the next letter, Dean pulls out a book. There's a man in a red striped shirt on the front. It's Waldo. Sam likes finding Waldo with Dean. Sometimes when there is nothing on TV or if they can't go outside, Dean will look for Waldo with his brother. It was hard to find him at first -everyone else wants to look like Waldo too and that makes it difficult- but they are starting to remember where he is. Waldo doesn't get around a lot.

Dean says there's another thing 'W' stands for: werewolf. Sam remembers seeing a movie about the man who becomes a wolf with the full moon. He didn't like it much. Dean, on the other hand, loves werewolves.

The next is two lines are intersecting, like a cross fallen on its side. Dean calls this one 'X' and says it stands for X-Men. Sammy does like X-Men.

'Y' is another funny looking letter and Dean depicts it off the page too by putting his arms in the air, like he's a human 'Y'. Then he holds up Sam's yellow crayon. "'Y' is for yellow, Sammy's favorite color," says Dean.

Yellow is Sammy's very favorite color.

It's the last page of the notebook and Sam likes this letter best. It's all sharp edges and something he could draw well himself if he wanted to. Sam traces it with his finger and asks Dean what this letter is. "This is the letter 'Z' and it's the last letter of the alphabet Sammy. The letter 'Z' is for zombie. You know what a zombie is Sammy?"

Sam shakes his head.

"Zombies are dead people that come outta their graves at night and walk around all stumbling and stuff and they are very very hungry… for human brains!" Dean is a little too theatrical and Sammy eyes widen with fear. The elder brother quickly backtracks and puts a reassuring hand on his brother's shoulder.

"Don't worry Sammy, I wouldn't let a zombie eat you. I know how to kill a zombie."

Sam needs to know too. He doesn't want to get eaten. "How?"

Dean puts a finger on his brother's forehead, right between his eyes. "Silver bullet, right there, right to the brain. Done." Sammy's eyes grow large, this time in awe of his brother, happy that he has such a brother to kill zombies so they don't eat him and then suddenly, Sam giggles. His brother is teasing him again. Silly Dean.

"Zombies isn't exist," Sam counters, laughing.

Dean smiles slowly, something comforting and wistful, ruffling his brother's mound of unkempt brown hair. "Yeah, you're right, Sammy. Zombies don't exist."

Dean closes the notebook. "We'll play again tomorrow?"

Sammy nods his head furiously. He'd like that a lot, he's got to get better at these... alphabits.

"Good?" The youngest Winchester worries aloud as his brother goes to turn on the TV again.

"Yeah, you did real good Sammy." The television flares to life and Dean disappears into the bedroom.

Sammy smiles to himself. He did really good. Maybe someday he'll be smart just like Dean. Someday.


Last note: I understand the silver bullet to the brain (depending on what episode you watch) is incorrect but I thought we could allow Dean an inconsistency; he was new at this hunter game and of course, wouldn't encounter real zombies until later :D Reviews are simply adored.