Author's Note: I originally wrote this fanfiction for my school's anime club.

Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia; that belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. That is all.


Getting Kicked out of Wal-Mart: Hetalia Style!

It was just another normal day in the city of Suujiku. 18-year-old Roderich Edelstein and his girlfriend, Elizabeta Hedervary, were on their way to Wal-Mart when they heard whispers and snickering from under a dark blue comforter in the back of Roderich's car.

"What's that?" asked Elizabeta.

"I think I have an idea," Roderich said, and pulled back the comforter, revealing two boys. They were Roderich's baby brothers: 10-year-old Gilbert and 6-year-old Ludwig Beilschmidt.

"Ehehehehe," the boys laughed nervously, looking at their annoyed older brother.

"Gilbert, Ludwig, what the heck are you two doing in my car?" asked Roderich.

"Gilbo did it!"/"It was West's idea!" Gilbert and Ludwig said simultaneously and pointed at each other.

"Why are we going to boring Wal-Mart?" Gilbert asked.

"'Cause Roddy's cheap, that's why," Ludwig said and laughed.

Roderich sighed and shook his head. "Looks like I'm stuck with you two," he whined. 'Darn it!' he thought, as he had planned on spending the day with Elizabeta, and only Elizabeta.

Minutes later, the four of them arrived at Wal-Mart. Gilbert and Ludwig started running around like little maniacs and scared a bunch of people.

"Hey, you two, come back here!" Roderich shouted as he and Elizabeta ran around the store, trying to catch the boys.


Gilbert went into the meat section of the store. He took a ham out of the case and quietly snuck behind an Englishman and an American boy about Ludwig's age.

"I want hamburgers, Arthur!" the boy said, jumping up and down.

"For the last time, Alfred," said Arthur, "no hamburgers tonigh—OUCH! Bloody hell!" Arthur rubbed his head after Gilbert hit him with the ham and looked around.

"Alright, who did that?" Alfred called.


Ludwig hid in the center of a clothes rack full of boys' shirts and waited for people to come by. Minutes later, a mother and her son went up to the rack.

'Okay, Feliks," said the woman, "I'll be back in a few minutes. Just pick out whatever outfit you want, okay?"

"Okay, Mommy," said Feliks. He reached for a light blue shirt.

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Ludwig yelled as he jumped out from behind the shirts, scaring poor Feliks to tears as the boy ran away to his mother.


"Those two little…" Roderich said irritably.

"Hey, I see them," said Elizabeta. She pointed to Gilbert and Ludwig, who were now bothering an employee.

"Hey, why is this store called Wal-Mart?" asked Gilbert. The employee didn't answer him.

"What's up with your hair?" Ludwig asked, pointing at the man's hair, which made him look like one of the Beatles. The employee rolled his eyes and looked away from Ludwig.

Gilbert spoke up next and pointed at the man's name tag. "Hey, why do you people wear name tags?" he asked. "Can't you all remember your own names?"

"Okay, that's enough," said Roderich as he and Elizabeta grabbed Gilbert and Ludwig and dragged them away from the now relieved employee.

"You two better behave," Roderich said in a stern voice. "Or else I'll tell Mom and Dad what you did."

"Buy me a toy, Roderich, buy me a toy, buy me a toy!" Ludwig exclaimed and hung onto one of Roderich's legs while Gilbert got on the other.

"Oh, please, Big Bro!" said Gilbert.

"No," said Roderich. "Now get off me."

"Fine," Gilbert and Ludwig said, and then ran to the toy aisle.

"I've got an idea," said Roderich. He went to an aisle, bought a cheap bottle of ketchup, and went to one part of the toy aisle where the boys haven't gone through yet.

"Roderich, what are you doing?" asked Elizabeta.

"Just watch," said Roderich. He then opened the ketchup bottle, smeared some ketchup on himself, and lay on the floor with his eyes closed. Elizabeta, now getting the jist of Roderich's plan, threw the bottle away.


Minutes later, Gilbert and Ludwig were playing with toy lightsabers, when Ludwig tripped over backwards and fell on the floor.

"Are you okay?" Gilbert asked, and then screamed in terror at what he saw. Ludwig looked over to what Gilbert was pointing at and screamed at the top of his lungs.

The boys saw Roderich with ketchup smeared on his clothes and lying on the floor. They thought he was dead and that the ketchup was blood.

"Ha-ha, gotcha!" Roderich said triumphantly.

Gilbert was mad. "You jerk!" he yelled.

"You're a meanie," Ludwig said as he stopped crying.

"Now will you two just…stop acting like maniacs?" Roderich said exasperatedly.

"Alright," Gilbert and Ludwig said and sighed.

"Good," said Roderich. "Now, we're going home and—" Roderich stopped talking when he saw Elizabeta singing in front of a security camera.

"Lizzie, what the heck do you think you're doing?" Roderich asked in surprise.

"I'm just auditioning for American Idol, Roddykins," said Elizabeta.

"First my brothers, now you," Roderich said under his breath. "What am I going to do with you three?"

Just then, a security guard came up to the quartet. "Excuse me, but you guys are going to have to leave," the man said.

"Make us!" said Gilbert.

"Fine, then, I will," the security guard said and dragged a now screaming Roderich out while two other guards escorted Elizabeta and the boys out of the store.

"Guys, you really did it this time," Roderich said angrily to the boys as they, he, and Elizabeta made their way home. "You're lucky I'm not telling Mom and Dad about this."


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