SC: Athena, Hades, Annabeth, Zeus
GR: Poseidon, Percy, Hermes, Hera
The Halloween of Annoyance
A/N: SC: this was made by me (Starlight Comet) and GazmRules on a very weird sleepover before Halloween. Dun, dun, DUN!
GR: notice how Starlight made me be all boys except for Hera!
SC: NO I DIDN'T!
GR: SHUT UP! Now, on with this very amusing story on how
Halloween was started on Olympus. Thank you.
Athena: *eye twitches* Hermes! You idiot! You're more annoying then that fish over there! *points at random fish*
Poseidon: *sighing* for once, I agree with Wise a**.
Hermes: HAPPY HALLOWEEN! Come on, guys! Lighten up! It'll be fun! There's candy on the line here! Perfectly good candy that should be stolen! But I can't steel candy with all the mortals and law enforcements zipping around!
Hera: I would think the god of thieves would be able to steal anything at anytime.
Annabeth: isn't this like the nineteen hundreds or something? How can we be born?
Hades: Well, child, you were made from when your father and mother were alone and drunk and then there was a random bed. And then your father started unzipping his pants and then he-
Annabeth: *covering her ears with her hands* I DON'T WANNA KNOW THAT! YOU MESSED UP PERVERT!
Athena: *glancing at Hades with narrowed eyes* and how do you know this?
Hades: so it's true?
Percy: I don't wanna ask how I came along…
Poseidon: you don't need to know how.
Percy: I wouldn't listen either way.
Hermes: C'MON! NOOOO! WHY WON'T YOU PEOPLE EAT THE CANDY! I PROMISE IT WASN'T ME WHO POISENED IT, IT WAS DIONYSUS! I SWEAR!
Hera: where is that drunken moron, anyway?
Hermes: I dunno. Shouldn't Zeusy know?
Zeus: 'Zeusy'? WHAT IS YOUR STINKIN' PROBLEM YOU WASTED MORON?
Annabeth: *cowers back*
Hades: *rubs his head tiredly* well, we might as well go make the most of this horrific evening…
Athena: I thought you loved Halloween? It's the spookiest night that scares mortals to death. Surely that would please you, Gloomy God?
Hades: shut it Wise Girl.
Hermes: MY PROBLEM is no one will trick or treating with me! *starts to cry like a five year old*
Percy: HEY! I made up that nickname for Annabeth! You can't steal it from ME and use it for ATHENA!
Hades: *towers over Percy and shows his true self* Oh, really? I can't? WOULD YOU LIKE TO TRY AND STOP ME YOU INSOLENT FOOL?
Percy: isn't a fool a royal servant to a king?
Poseidon: Get out of your true form, Hades. You'll make the lice in you hair tremble with fear and run away.
Hades: *goes back to normal* isn't that the point of this infuriating holiday? NOW, LET'S GO TRICK OR TREATING AS YOU MORTALS SAY! *Flies on broomstick from Harry Potter*
Harry Potter: HEY! YOU STOLE MY BROOMSTICK!
Hades: *laughs like a maniac* MWAHAHAHAHAHA!
Athena: I suppose we should go after him.
Poseidon: you can, im not.
Hera: *sneers at Poseidon* afraid?
Hermes: oh, Halloween ain't nothin' to be 'fraid of. It's only filled with mortals trying to kill others with poison in the candy. Dionysus helps them wit dat a wittle I dink.
Poseidon: I don't fear Halloween. I just prefer to stay away from it, sense anything dead will obey Hades, and when he's as drunk as Hermes and Dionysus put together, then it wont be pretty.
Percy: Dad, he's not drunk, and on Halloween, it's only kids in costumes, not real dead people.
Poseidon: that what you mortals believe. But gods see through the Mist. Half of them are really dead.
Hermes: I LIKE COOKIES! *laughs like a deranged monkey*
Athena: *sigh* I AM LEAVING YOU IDIOTS! *doesn't leave room*
Zeus: *turns to Hera* do you want to go, or go back to our castle because I have something else in mind for us to do…*waggles eyebrows suggestively*
Athena: Ugh, get a room.
Zeus: THAT'S WHAT I'M TRYING TO DO!
Annabeth: wait, how can two gods do…that?
Zeus: *glares at Annabeth* that is none of your business how we make-
Athena: OKAY! WHO WANTS TO GO TRICK OR TREATING?
Hermes: I DO! IDOIDODIDO!
Percy: Annabeth, should I even ask WHY you keep asking questions like THAT!
Annabeth: no, it would be a total fail to try and get into my mind, Percy. Now, *grabs Percy's hand* let us go trick or treating! *run out the door of the throne room*
Percy: *blushes madly.*
Athena: *follows and calls to them* NO UNDERWATER MAKEOUT SESSIONS YOU TWO! *leaves room*
Poseidon: *grumbling* that boy better not try anything stupid….
Hermes: oh, you know they WILL!
Poseidon: SHUT IT, HERMES!
Hermes: YOU SCARE DA KITTY! *points to Cloudtail who is eating a cookie.*
Cloudtail: DON'T HURT MY COOKIE! It took forever to get it from Firestar!
Firestar: I DON'T KNOW WHAT A STINKN' COOKIE IS CLOUDTAIL! AND WHY ARE YOU EATING TWOLEG FOOD?
Graystripe: but you like white chocolate macadamia cookies!
Firestar: WHITE CHOCOLATE MACADAMIA!
Zeus: Hera, let us go find some solitude somewhere…else. Preferably a room with a bed.
Poseidon: Oh, get a life Zeus. Making love all the time is just gonna give some serious health issues and im not taken' care of you!
Zeus: you're just mad because you're not able to even try to make love with someone! Not only that, but NO ONE WANTS TO DO YOU!
Poseidon: TAKE THAT BACK! I DO have a WIFE and we HAVE done it!
Zeus: PROVE IT!
Poseidon: how can I prove it? What, do you think I'd video tape that?
Hermes: what, you don't?
Poseidon: *shakes his head and sighs* someone kills them. Just kill them.
Zeus: we can't die, Sea Brain.
Poseidon: don't remind me. *points to some slave from planet Irk.* YOU! GET ME AN ASPRIN!
Random Irken: ZIM DOES NOT TAKE ORDERS FROM A FOOL LIKE YOU! GO AHEAD! POINT YOUR POINTY STICK AT ME! WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? ZAP ME BACK TO IRK?
Poseidon: IT'S A TRIDENT, NOT A POINTY STICK! And no, I wont zap you back to IRK, I'll zap you into Tartarus!
Hera: I don't think you'll really do that, Poseidon, when you fear the dead.
Poseidon: And whoever said I fear the dead?
Zeus: you did…
Poseidon: prove it, then, Zeus.
Hermes: uhhhh…are you guys comin or not?
Poseidon: STAY OUTTA THIS, YOU DRUNK MORON! Really, you're worst then Athena sometimes.
Athena: *yells from the mortal world* I HEARD THAT POSEIDON AND I TAKE IT AS A COMPLIMENT! NOW, YOU! *yells to random, unseen kid* GIVE THE GODDESS OF WISDOM YOUR CANDY!
Poseidon: SO YOU ADMIT TO BE MORE ANNOYING THEN HERMES AND DIONYSUS?
Athena: YOU ONLY SAID HERMES YOU JERK! YES! *maniacal laugh* CANDY!
Poseidon: she's gonna puke. And it better not be in a toilet, because all toilets lead to MY Ocean, and it's already dirty enough.
Zeus: oh, I will personally make a special request to Athena then so she can puke in the toilet.
Poseidon: and you know poisoned water hurt your precious Thilia. And, I can personally make sure the water fountain has the filthiest water on the face of the planet.
Hera: and not from the underworld because you're too afraid of the dead.
Poseidon: I DO NOT FEAR THE DEAD! *lying*
Hera: sure you don't. *rolls her eyes*
Zeus: you. Wouldn't. dare.
Poseidon: I can, and I will.
*sudden bolts of lightning illuminate the sky*
Zeus: IF YOU DO THEN BY MY VERY OWN LIGHTNING BOLT I SWEAR I WILL PERSONALLY BURN YOU TO YOUR OWN INTERNAL HELL, POSEIDON. DON'T TEST ME.
Poseidon: wont that make you more like Kronos?
Hera: and how would you know what he's like? Do you favor the Titan Lord more then the gods?
Poseidon: *eyes flare and his trident appears* I WILL NOT BE INSULTED BY SOMEONE WHO MARRIED HER OWN BROTHER!
Hermes: but you're her brother too.
Poseidon: SHUT UP!
Zeus: Poseidon. Summon Hades. Now.
Poseidon: you can summon our brother yourself. After all, you won that drawing thingy and became lord of all the gods.
Zeus: oh. Right. HADES!
*Hades suddenly appears*
Hades: what? I WAS JUST ABOUT TO STEAL FROM A WHINY TWO YEAR OLD WHO WOULDN'T STOP SCREAMING 'MAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMA!'!
Zeus: Hades, I have something to ask of you.
Hades: does it involve Twizzlers?
Zeus: no it doesn't-
Hades: candy corn?
Zeus: no i-
Hades: chocolate Easter bunnies?
Zeus: NO! NOW SHUT UP AND LISTEN!
Hades: *looks at Hermes* got any twos?
Hermes: go fish.
Poseidon: There are no fish here…and you don't have any cards.
Hades: yeah, there's you. You're a fish.
Poseidon: YOU JUST WENT OVERBOARD!
Hades: OVERBOARD! HAHAHAHA!
Zeus: BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP! *turns to Hades* I want you to summon the dead for me.
Zeus: you'll see.
Hades: can I have some cupcakes first? Please?
Poseidon: you wouldn't…..*thinking: oh crap….*
Zeus: *goes into Poseidon's thoughts: and not the stuff from your ocean either.*
Poseidon: *thinks back to Zeus: GET OUTTA MY HEAD! Besides, I can always make some poor idiot from another planet to put all that crap in your pillow.*
Zeus: *Thinks: why? Too scared to do it yourself? Wait. Why is it so cold and gloomy all of a sudden?*
Hades: *surrounded by his dead soul people* THERE YOU GO! HAPPY? NOW WHERE'S MY CUPCAKE?
Poseidon: *shivers and closes his eyes taking deep breaths* I hate you all….
Hermes: *reaching into the pocket of a dead person and pulls out a skull candle* ohhhh…..cool! *puts it in his back pocket and smirks*
Dead person: *turns to Hermes* Ohhhhhhhh…*moaning and groaning* yuh.. you.. stole…me cand..candle…
Hermes: DID NOT!
Poseidon: uhhhh….i think I'll go find Percy…
Hera: no, you're staying here. But we're leaving. *grabs Zeus's hand and smiles all loving like*
Zeus: *grins* Have fun Poseidon! *laughs and the door slams shut*
Hermes: I WONT STOP 'TIL YOU JOIN THE TRICK OR TREATING SQUAD!
Poseidon: anything to get away from these….things…*shudders*
Hermes: NO! IM STAYING UNTIL THE LOVERS GET OUT HERE! Until then…..*smirks and goes into the closet where Zeus keep's his most prized possessions.* this is going to be easy….
Hades: *has chocolate around his mouth* want some? *holds a piece of bitten chocolate in front of Poseidon*
Poseidon: uhhh….i guess….*takes chocolate*
Hades: *squeals like a girl* YAY! THIS IS GOING TO BE THE BEST HALLOWEEN EVER!
Poseidon: *takes one bite of the chocolate before spitting it out.* THERE WAS NEVER A MORE DISGUSTING OBJECT IN THE WORLD! *gags from the aftertaste* after taste sounds TOO much like After Life….*shudders again*
Athena: *suddenly pops up and starts throwing up all over Poseidon*
Poseidon: *eye twitching* I stand corrected….HADES GET RID OF THE DEAD ALL READY! They're really starting to freak me out…
Hera: *comes into the throne room wearing only a thin robe and sees Athena puking on Poseidon*
Poseidon: kill me. Kill me now.
Hera: no. it wont be as fun to make you wet yourself by making Hades bring Cerberus in, when your dead.
Poseidon: *glares at the still-puking Athena* WILL YOU GET THE HECK AWAY FROM ME! *pushes her away with his trident* IM GOING BACK TO THE SEA! …once I use Zeus's shirt to wipe the vomit off. HERMES! Do you mind stealing one of Zeus's shirts?
Hermes: WOOHOO! *runs off and comes back with a whole box of shirts* lets see, we have red, blue, green, yellow, white, black, brown, PINK –wow that wasn't expected..
Poseidon: give me the pink and the white one.
Hermes: *gives him the shirts*
Poseidon: *take shirts and wipes off the vomit before slipping them into Zeus's dresser somehow.* *retreats back into the sea*
This didn't turn out as disastrous as most…well, until the next holiday…..*smirks* that poor turkey wont know what hit him…or her…or it…
Skipper: you didn't see anything.