Title: Marriage Counseling
Disclaimer: I own none, all belong to Joss Whedon
Comments: Always welcomed!
Summary: Spike and Xander go to a Marriage Counseling because Xander is jealous of Spike's relationship with his sire.
Warnings/Spoilers: Post NFA
Bunny plot by: Skargasm
Beta'd by: Whichclothes
"Master Spike, I'm Dr. Purell," A Gor'pha demon who was a demon counselor asked Spike when he and Xander entered his office. "What can I do for you and your pet today?"
"Hey! I am not his pet." Xander glared at the small scaly green demon. He than turned to Spike. "You said we were going to a marriage counselor. I am not your pet!"
The demon simply raised its eyebrow but made no comment.
Spike pushed Xander into an empty seat before sitting next to him. "Here's the problem doc. Me and my Xanpet have been together for quiet awhile."
"And you have grown bored with him?" The demon guessed. "It is completely normal. Many vampires who have claimed humans soon grow tired of them."
Xander glowered at the demon and folded his arm over his chest. Spike growled at the assumption, "No, you berk. I love the idiot," Spike said pointing to Xander.
"I'm not an idiot!" Xander snapped and glared at Spike. "I have been married to you for two years! There is only so much I can take!"
"What is the problem?" Dr. Purell asked finally addressing Xander.
Xander sat up straighter, happy that he was finally being recognized. "The problem is his grandsire!"
"The problem is he isn't even my claimed!" Spike shot right back.
Dr. Purell's eyebrow went up at both their statements. "He isn't your claimed? I thought you were married?"
"We are... by human terms," Spike replied looking more than just a little pissed.
"Why have you not claimed him into your line?" Dr. Purell asked with confusion. Spike shot a look at Xander. "You do not want to be claimed by Master Spike?"
Xander looked a little uncomfortable. "It's not that. The reason is what is needed to be done for the claim to take place."
"Ahh you speak of the ritual of where Master Angelus has to accept you into the family." Dr. Purell understood. "It is not all that uncommon for humans to not want that physical connection with someone they do not love."
"That's what I keep telling him!" Xander said exasperated. "They are both trying to push me into and it is never going to happen. The only reason Angel even wants to do the ritual is because he knows that means he gets to fuck Spike again."
Spike sighed, "It wouldn't be like that. It would be a one time thing and that's it."
"Yeah well it isn't happening," Xander told him. "Angel is still holding a torch for you and I'm not letting him touch you."
"Is there anything Spike can do that will make you feel more at ease with the ceremony?" Dr. Purell asked.
"Yeah, we could find our own place. We're living with deadboy!" Xander said angrily. "We've been married for two years and we're living with Spike's ex-lover how wrong is that?"
Spike looked guilty. "It's not like that, he's family. Besides it's not like his room is next door. We're on the other side of the hotel."
"I can understand why Xander is upset." Dr. Purell said to Spike. "It could be taken that you are holding onto your past relationship."
"Is that how you feel, Xan?" Spike asked, he had never meant for Xander to think that.
Xander shrugged, "Kind of. I mean it's a little weird to be living with your ex. How would you feel if I made you live with..." Xander frowned, both of the women he had been in a relationship with were now gone. "You know what I mean."
Spike did know what he meant. He wouldn't have been happy if he had to live under the same roof with Cordelia or Anya. "I'm sorry, pet."
"Does that mean you will be looking for a place for yourselves?" Dr. Purell asked. He knew that Spike loved Xander, he just didn't always think about others' feelings.
"Yeah," Spike grabbed Xander's hand giving it a squeeze.
Dr. Purell nodded, "And Xander in the future if Spike does something you don't like you have to tell him how you are feeling. He is a vampire not a mind reader," He reminded Xander.
"Maybe I have been an idiot," Xander admitted.
"But you're my idiot," Spike replied with a small smile. "I guess the bints were right about needing to talk to each other more about our feelings."
Xander pouted; he knew neither of them would live this down. "So when are we going to apartment shop?" He asked. Xander couldn't wait to get out of the hotel and away from Angel.
Spike jumped out of his chair and pulled Xander up with him. "Tomorrow, right now we have more important things to worry about."
"What do we have to do?" Xander asked; he couldn't remember anything else they had to do.
"Make up sex," Spike enlightened Xander. "Thanks, doc!" He called over his shoulder and as he dragged Xander out of the office.
Dr. Purell shook his head. "Vampires."