The cast was just sitting around doing various activities like reading, playing video games, and trying to find a way off this hunk of precipitation, when a section of Cloud separated itself from the rest and assumed a vaguely humanoid shape. This shape turned out to be Samus Aran, famed bounty hunter and one-time Galactic Federation recruit.
"Huh?" she said in a confused voice, tilting her head and raising her arm cannon a little.
"Oh ho ho ho, you are not gonna like this." Phoenix chuckled as he opened a door in the fabric of space time, closing it carefully before turning around to face Samus.
He blinked in surprise before asking exasperatedly, "Teleporter in the Falls of Fire? Ugh, that thing is always malfunctioning. Hold on...", eyes unfixing as he stared off into space for a while.
After a couple minutes of awkward silence, he suddenly snapped back to reality and smiled at Samus, promising, "There, should be fixed. Now off with ye!" before snapping his fingers to make Samus vanish.
The host turned to the cast and admitted, "As I was saying, you aren't gonna like this. Sorry."
After holding his apologetic smile for a moment, he smiled evilly and contradicted, "Except not. Heh heh heh heh heh..." and everybody blanched at the evil undertone of his laugh. They went even whiter when he caused the towering form of Zeus to appear.
"WHO DARES SUMMON THE MIGHTY - " Zeus began, Cloud flashing with lightning below the feet of our cast, but when he saw Phoenix waving up at him he promptly shrunk to average size and said, "Oh hey Nix. Truth or dare fic?"
"Truth or dare fic. Here, could ya read these?" Phoenix asked him, handing the God a set of Greek tablets.
"Oh sure. Noúmero éna, Winnifred has to be nice for the rest of this fiction." he began, smirking as the other Sandersons had to hold her back from attacking the God, "Noúmero dýo, for Mary, how come you don't just overpower Winnie when she gets angry and/or bossy?"
Winnie turned to Mary in a flash of intimidating rage, and only Sarah's surprising strength prevented her from clawing Mary's eyes out. Zeus let out a 'heh' and continued, "Noúmero tría, Sarah has to read the ENTIRE Encyclopædia Britannica."
Sarah staggered under the impressive weight of the pile of books suddenly cradled in her arms, inadvertently releasing a seething Winnie on an unsuspecting Mary.
Ignoring the threats called out from behind him, Zeus listed, "Noúmero téssera, Alison and Max have to kiss each other." raising an eyebrow at the couple that were kissing since Max gave Allison flowers last chapter. After a pause he said, "Vetoed. Arithmó pénte, Dani has to stand upside down and drink a glass of water. And finally, arithmó éxi for Thackery, do you prefer being a cat or human?"
He handed the tablets back to Phoenix, who said, "Thanks Zeus!" and nodded once before turning to blinding golden light and vanishing.
Clapping his hands briskly, Phoenix turned to Winnie to enact her dare. After pulling the seething redhead off the now-bleeding raven, he turned her to face him and bound her in chains. "I don't understand how you can still be so horrible to everybody after last chapter." he mused before shrugging and digressing, "Ah well, in a few seconds you be perfectly pleasant."
He took a deep breath, paused to think of a rhyme, then said, "Heart like stone and cold as ice, forevermore you shall be nice.".
Winnie's face contorted into an even more rageful knot, then slowly loosened into a look of passiveness. And then suddenly, she broke down into tears and rushed at Mary and Sarah, bringing them both into crushing hugs. "I'm so sorry for everything I've ever done to either of you, I love you so much!" she cried, rocking the three of them from side to side.
"I think this answers my truth." Mary managed to choke out, face turning purple as Winnie kept squeezing. Winnie jumped back and professed her sorriness for crushing her sister's windpipe, somehow breaking through Phoenix's no-magic wards to conjure an oven for the purpose of baking cookies. Phoenix's eyebrow twitched at the outright abnormalness of the gesture, then he turned to see Sarah, just now closing the back cover of the last volume of the Encyclopædia Britannica.
In answer to Phoenix's raised eyebrow, Sarah piped up, "I habituated a chronological discontinuation incantation to preclude temporal amelioration for the totality of the epoch postulated to construe these engaging opuscules."
Dani leaned close to Phoenix's ear and whispered, "What?" and Phoenix simplified, "She used a spell to stop time so she could read the books. Now, didn't you have a dare to complete?"
Dani shrugged and proceeded to do a handstand, taking the glass of water Phoenix conjured up and taking an upside-down drink. Or, well, tried to. She started spluttering water all over her face, collapsing onto her back and splashing the rest onto her front. Thackery's face slowly went red as Dani stood up with her now-skintight shirt, a beaming Anne standing behind him and whispering to Emily, "Fanservice."
Emily, who had in the last couple of days discovered anime, giggled.
Dani sighed in annoyance and snapped her fingers, drying her clothes instantly. After Thackery's face had returned to its rightful color, Phoenix asked him, "So, redundant after the last chapter, but do you prefer human or cat form?"
His eyes widened in remembered fear and he started babbling about 'it was so lonely' and 'dying hurts' and 'the hairballs, oh the hairballs...'
"Alrighty then!" Phoenix interrupted loudly, clapping a hand over Thackery's mouth and whispering his dare from Jennarella in his ear. His face returned to that red color as Phoenix let him go, but with a confident air he strode over to Dani and asked, "Dani, will you go out with me?"
Dani's eyes widened in surprise as she looked up from the book she had begun reading, but after a moment she gave a small smile and hesitantly nodded.
Anne and Emily squealed something along the lines of, "Kawaii!" but as it was so high only dogs could hear it nobody understood. They were too busy with their bleeding ears.
"Read and review. Owwwww..." Phoenix groaned, clutching his ears.