EDIT: 30-10-2010: ADDED AN OMAKE

Title: Meet the Master
Author: a1y-puff
Fandom: D. Gray-Man
Characters: Allen, Cross, Kanda, Kanda/Allen-ish
Genre: failed attempt at humor? let's just say general/romance-but-not-really? .;;;
Summary: Allen had to bring Kanda to meet Cross. And really? He didn't actually fancy the idea, but.
Rating: PG
Warning: AU
Disclaimer: Hoshino owns them all. Rawr.

A/N: in an attempt to revive my writing muse, Mandy (Harmony283) gave me a prompt: Allen - beer can and it somehow resulted in this..stupid drabble. ;_;

Seriously, my writing skill! Where art thou? DDD:


Allen could hear the clock ticking quite loudly in his ears, and he fidgeted again in his seat. Seriously, the silence was a little unnerving. What was up with that anyway? He glanced aside to his right and found Kanda putting on his usual annoyed-bored expression on his face, but—Allen knew better now. He caught that slight twitch of Kanda's fingers and—

Allen jolted when a can of beer was slammed down on the table in front of them. He raised his eyes up to meet the piercing eyes of his guardian, before said guardian took a new can of beer from the coffee table, opened it and started sipping again, leaning back against the couch.

Really, Allen was sure Cross was doing it on purpose—dragging the silence on and on and on and—


"So," Cross began, aiming his piercing gaze to Kanda now, "You're sure you don't just—want to get into this idiot's pants?"

"What the f—"

"Master, come on! We haven't even passed third base yet We even barely make it to second base !"

"What base?"

Cross raised an eyebrow, and Allen turned to Kanda with a look.

"And you've been together for—how long?"

"Three months but—"

"And you're barely on second base?"

"Well, it's—"

"What base? What the fuck are you talking about?" Kanda cut them off impatiently, looking confusedly annoyed.

And Cross burst out laughing.

Allen palmed his face and mumbled, "That is one of the reasons—"

"Moyashi," Kanda growled menacingly into his face, "What."

Just then, Cross leaned forward and pointed his finger towards Kanda's nose, the abrupt motion making the beer Cross was still holding slosh out of the can a little and Kanda. Did not. Like. That.

"You," Cross said with a smirk, not removing his finger despite Kanda growling at him, "areinteresting," Cross added, before turning to Allen and said, "You're sure he'd be able to top you?"

"Isn't he?" Allen grinned, carefully maneuvering Cross' hand and the can of beer away before Kanda snapped, because Kanda always hated alcohols. "So he passed?"

Cross leaned back against the backrest of the couch, giving the both of them (Kanda especially) a long, assessing look, swishing the can of beer in his right hand, and letting the sloshing sound of the liquid filling the silence. Allen fidgeted yet again, unconsciously wringing his hands, because—well. This time, what he wanted Cross to approve was... serious. and he just—

Suddenly, there was a hand covering his, willing him to calm the hell down, and it made Allen look up to his right side and find Kanda looking defiantly back at Cross, except that there was just something in those deep cobalt eyes that was just...

"No funny business," Cross suddenly said, and Allen could hear the underlying threat in his deep baritone voice. "No fourth base until he's seventeen. Understood?"


"Yes!" Allen hurriedly replied, heartily so. "No fourth base. Yes, we get it."

His seventeenth birthday was like, in less than two months from now anyway, so what did it matter?

"I didn't ask you, brat." Cross turned to Kanda and, "Well?"

"What are you—" but then there was a pinch on his waist and Kanda jolted, and Allen gave him the look, telling the older teen to just go with it and—"Fuck. Yeah, okay, what-fucking-ever."

"There," Allen smiled sweetly, a little too brightly at Cross, and finally, Cross slammed his now-empty beer can down the table once again, before standing up.

"I'm leaving. Clean up the mess."

And then he was gone. Just like that.

Allen sighed in relief.

"Oi," Kanda called, "What the fuck was that?"

"Cross," the British boy replied tiredly, before grinning up at Kanda with an entirely different level of brightness, and then he just—leaned up and kissed the older teen square on his lips.

He was more than pleased when Kanda kissed back.

"Well," he broke away after a moment, "Let's clean this mess~"

With that, he started picking up the beer cans strewn all over his living room, but he instead of grumbling like he usually would, Allen was humming.



"What bases were you talking about earlier?"

Allen's hand halted midway of picking a beer can under the table, and—well.



OMAKE: (Written by Evanescent Silence)

Allen: Well, Kanda, the thing is, I mean, er, you see... when two people are, um, intimate... or trying to be at least, it certainly isn't for the lack of trying...
Kanda: The fuck are you on about?
Allen: Shut up, jerk, I'm trying to explain. Ah, well, when two people are intimate, they... *coughs* You know how they might start off doing fairly... fairly... "light" stuff?
Kanda: *frowns, then scowls* "Stuff", moyashi? Light? The fu-
Allen: It's Allen. *looks frustrated* You know, like kissing. And holding hands. And I don't know, innocent things like that.
Kanda: *little frown now* Innocent...?
Allen: Yes, well. That's first base to some people. And then when things get-
Kanda: The hell you talking about? First you're talking about kissing and now you're on about the bases again?
Allen: *tries not to choke Kanda just out of frustration* The kisses ARE the bases, Kanda!
Kanda: WHAT?
Allen: Well, only just the first one, really.
Kanda: Why the fuck are you calling that "bases" an-!
Allen: It's a metaphor, you arse!
Kanda: It's a shit ass excuse for a metaphor then!

Lavi: *dies laughing wherever he's hiding to eavesdrop*

I really need some motivation so if you read this please leave me a review? Thank you :)