Title taken from the song "I Want a Mom" by Cyndi Lauper, from Rugrats Go to Paris (seriously, who DOESN'T love that movie? I know Wrath likes it ^^)


In Envy's opinion, there was nothing better than having everybody gone for the day. With the hideout empty, he had everything to himself. Couch, TV, bathroom, kitchen, everything. Nobody could yell at him for doing anything, but he could yell at inanimate objects. Which he tried not to do too often... because yelling at the toaster to hurry up wouldn't make it go any faster. It still cooked the bread at its own pace, and no amount of shouting at it would change that, really. But anyway, he usually had fun while he was alone. The only thing better than having everyone gone for the day...


... Was if they'd taken that little brat with them.

Envy groaned as the dark-haired boy raced into the room he had currently been occupying. The youngest Homunculus skidded to a stop in front of the couch, which was where Envy was at the moment. He blinked his big lavender eyes at the older one - well, Envy assumed he was blinking both eyes, because his left was hidden by his bangs. Hands in loose fists at his sides, he held Envy's gaze for maybe a minute.

Finally, Envy decided to change it up, and raised an eyebrow at the kid. He stretched and yawned, shifting his position slightly, just enough so that his feet now rested on the other arm of the sofa. He crossed his arms over his chest and allowed his eyes to close halfway. "Well? What do you want now, kid?"

Wrath gave his "brother" a grin and tugged at his arm. "Play with me, Envy! Play with me!"

Disgusted, Envy yanked his arm away and shoved the boy back. "And what the hell would I do that for?"

Wrath stumbled backward for a minute before landing with a thud on the hardwood floor. "Ouchies!" He rubbed his backside, and looked up at Envy with a hurt expression. "That hurt, you big meanie!"

Envy closed his eyes, swinging his arms so they rested under his head. "Yeah, that was kind of the point. You're not too bright, are you, kid?"

Envy expected Wrath to leave him be and go find some poor animal to torture instead. But that didn't happen. Less than thirty seconds later, he felt the kid pulling at one of his spiky strands of hair, like he was trying to yank it right out of his scalp. "Come on, Envy! Play with me, please! I'm so bored! There's nothing to do!"

Envy snapped his eyes open and first pulled Wrath's wrist back so that his hand was off the androgynous Homunculus's carefully styled hair. Then he gave the child a backhand to the face, turning over to face the wall and hoping Wrath would leave him alone so he could take a nap. "Then go play outside and get the hell away from me!"

"It's raining, Envy! If I go outside I'll catch a cold! You don't want me to get sick, do you?"

"Like hell I don't! You deserve to suffer! Now just get out of my sight, I don't care what the hell happens to you! You can go die in a hole for all I care, you bitchy little crybaby! Go rot in a well! You deserve to die for being such a whiny mama's boy!"

It wasn't even ten seconds before Wrath began pounding his little fists on Envy's back. "Why are you so mean? I just want you to play with me! Aren't you bored, too? I mean, since Lust broke the TV yesterday, there's nothing for you to do 'cause all you do is watch You're Cut Off! so you can see girls getting all up in each other's faces and calling each other Malibu whores!" (1)

Envy rolled over and his eyes almost bugged out of his head. Had Wrath seriously just said what he thought the kid had said? Envy decided to do the sane, sensible thing and give Wrath a whack over the head. "How the hell would you even know what they call each other? Sloth doesn't let you watch that shit!"

Wrath shrugged. "You talk in your sleep. Oh, and Mommy says you have a sailor's mouth."

"Yeah, well, you sleepwalk and you still suck your thumb and... wait a second. How the fuck do you know I talk in my sleep?"

Wrath made a sort of pout with his lips, sticking them both out. He clasped his hands behind his back and rocked on his heels. His eyes wouldn't meet the older Homunculus's. Finally he just blurted out, "I climbed into your bed last week 'cause Mommy wasn't here and I was tired and I didn't wanna sleep alone and everybody else said no!"

And then he darted out of the room like a speeding bullet, almost as if he knew what was coming.

Envy blinked, staring at the dust trail Wrath had left in his wake. It took the green-haired boy all of about twenty seconds before he fully comprehended what the kid had just told him.


When Envy finally caught Wrath, the kid was hiding in the bathtub with a bath mat over top of him, curled up in a ball as if that would somehow make him smaller. Envy ripped the bath mat off, tossing it aside, and grabbed the boy by his collar. Wrath yelped as Envy lifted him into the air, struggling to get free and flailing his mismatched limbs about. "Lemme go, lemme go, I'm sorry!"

"Sorry isn't even gonna begin to make up for it this time, you son of a bitch!" Envy brought the kid up so that their eyes met, and it was evident that Wrath was terrified at the moment. "Where the hell do you get off even coming into my room, much less getting into my bed - ESPECIALLY WHILE I'M STILL IN IT?"

Wrath squeaked, wiggling around. "I'm sorry, Envy! But I was so tired... and Mommy wasn't here! I wanted to go to sleep but I was scared to sleep by myself! And when Mommy's not here... when Mommy isn't here... I know you'll take as good care of me as she would!"

Envy blinked at the kid for a few seconds. When Sloth wasn't here, that automatically meant that he filled the "mommy" shoes? He finally settled on smacking the boy across the face. "DON'T LIE TO ME, YOU LITTLE BASTARD! YOU THINK I'M DUMB ENOUGH TO FALL FOR THAT STUPID CUTE ROUTINE, HUH?"

Wrath sniffled and began to cry. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"

Envy dropped the kid to the ground and glared. "Whatever you got to say in your defense, kid, you better say it now before I agree with the side of my mind that's telling me to carve you up like a Christmas ham and feed you to Gluttony when he gets back!"

Wrath was still bawling his eyes out. "I-I just wanted my mommy! She wasn't there so I went to you!" He curled up, throwing his hands over his head as more tears rolled down his face and were soaked up by the bath mat his so-called brother had dropped him on. It was almost like he expected Envy to hit him again. He wasn't wrong, but Envy found it just slightly disturbing that it was his first instinct to protect himself. "I don't wanna be with you anymore! I want my mommy! Make her come back!"

Envy sat down on the edge of the tub, watching the child's sorrow-induced tantrum. Something about this felt familiar, like he knew what Wrath was feeling right now. A half-gloved hand drifted to the center of his chest, where his Philosopher's Stone made its lodging. His fingers curled just a little, and he closed his eyes, trying to remember what the memory was. All he could remember was being alone... a feeling of being abandoned. His fingers tightened into a fist as he associated that sensation with his father. He didn't recall much about when he was transmuted, but he did remember that his mother, that bitch Dante... she hadn't even welcomed him. She hadn't given him a hug like a mother was supposed to do after she missed her child. She didn't tell him she loved him; she told him the purpose he would serve in the organization, and that was it. He had to give her some credit - she stuck around and raised him, even after that Hohenheim bastard left. But the selfish bitch... first she poisoned him, and then she transmuted him and turned him into... this. He had a mother, sure... but she hadn't exactly been the kind of mother any child really wanted. Who killed their own son because they were feeding him mercury in some insane attempt to make him immortal? Honestly...

"I want my mommy!" Wrath was still wailing, trembling in a heap on the floor, a mess of tears and self-pity. "I want my mommy!"

Envy sighed, and bent down. Scooping the kid up in his arms, he carried him out of the bathroom. He found it odd that Wrath stopped shrieking as soon as he was picked up. He shifted Wrath's position and placed a hand on the child's back as he walked down the stairs, careful not to drop him. "You and me both, kid. Now quit your crying. I'll play one game with you, but you better pick a good one."

... *sob* So sad but so cute. I love the ending where Wrath's screaming that he wants his mommy, and Envy's just like "Yeah... me too..." Waaaai so sad! Envy just wants to be loved... T.T

And they say I can't write canon without OC's. Haha, I showed THEM. ^^

(1) - You're Cut Off! is quickly becoming one of my FAVORITE shows. It's so funny but it has a lotta sad moments too. But the latest season where Jessica called Erika a Malibu whore... XD Priceless... and the fact that Wrath knows what it IS... XD

Well, stay tuned for the next chapter: Brother!

Just as a warning, during most of the next one Envy will be rather OOC, but there's a reason for it and it is explained... by Lust of all people. XD But at the end he starts being more like himself and I find it funny.

... Review or you'll make Wrath sad!

Wrath: *puppy dog eyes* Please... please review. You don't wanna make me cry, do you? *sobs*

Haha, I've got a secret weapon... the cuteness of a child Homunculus! :D