Oh sure. He'd known about this for several days in advance, so he should have had time to prepare for the awful outing. But he had decided not to - for whatever reason. He'd do it later, the brat was bugging him, he was playing a game, and so on.
Now the day had arrived and he was thoroughly dreading the events of the afternoon. He had to meet Sloth and the brat at the front door, which was exactly where he was headed. He came up, where they were both waiting. Within an instant Wrath had attached himself to the elder's leg. "Hi, big brother!"
"Yeah, hi." Envy sighed, holding his hand out for the bag Sloth was trying to give him. She was going on a bunch of errands in town today, and she couldn't keep track of Wrath while she was doing all of them. So of course, she had enlisted Envy's help to take care of the kid while she was doing her duties. Well... more like she had kind of blackmailed him with a picture she'd taken of that one time when she'd been in the house and Envy and Wrath had been sleeping. Curse him for letting the brat fall asleep on him... and curse Pride for letting Sloth buy that stupid HD camera. Basically all he had to do was keep Wrath busy, happy, and out of Sloth's hair. That meant he was probably going to be in Envy's hair, but there wasn't much he could do. If he refused, Sloth would tattle to Father and he'd end up going anyway. It was a lose-lose kind of thing.
He accepted the drawstring bag from Sloth and slung it over his shoulders. "So what's in here, anyway?"
"Not much." Sloth opened the door, beginning to venture out. "Just things to occupy Wrath. There are a few books, an MP3 player, a sippy cup with apple juice, and some snacks in case he gets hungry."
"Hell with that, I'm hungry."
"Why does he still drink out of a sippy cup?" Envy questioned, as he and Wrath followed the water-wielder. "I thought you weaned him off that thing, like, three or four years ago."
"A regular cup would have spilled all over the place, and a bottle would just look babyish," Sloth replied coolly.
"So... where are we going first?" Envy sighed, playing with the strings of the bag.
"Mall," Sloth answered, veering off on another path.
"Do we have to?" both Wrath and Envy whined in unison.
"Yes. And if you're good you might get candy on the way home."
Envy blinked. "... Wait, which one of us were you talking to?"
"Both of you."
Envy groaned. "So not how I wanted to spend my day."
"Envy! Envy, look! What are all those kids doin'? How... How come they're climbin' all over that stuff?"
Envy looked up and glanced over where Wrath was pointing. It was a playground full of little human children, most of whom were scampering around, going down the slide or running around in the playhouse and tunnels. "It's a playground, Wrath."
Wrath blinked, and then tugged on Envy's skort. "W-Well... aren't they gonna get in trouble?"
"No. It's there for them to play on."
"Ohhhh." He stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, seeming mesmerized by the playground, then rushed forward, pulling Envy backward. "Can I go play on it? Please?"
"Wrath!" Envy yanked Wrath off of him. "We're following Sloth, and I'm supposed to be keeping you out of trouble!"
"He can go play," Sloth commented, barely even turning around. "As long as you two promise to stay here until I get back in an hour and a half, he can play."
Wrath nodded frantically. "Of course, Mommy! I promise!" With that, he streaked off to the playground, laughing and grinning.
"Have fun," Sloth said. She back up and grabbed Envy by the hair, pulling him close to her. "By the way, if anything happens to him on your watch - if I find so much as one little scratch that hasn't been covered with a Band-Aid... I will kill you." She let go. "See you in a few hours."
Envy gulped and backed up slowly before turning around and chasing after his so-called little brother. "Wrath!"
He looked up and saw Wrath waving at him from the top of the playhouse. He was sitting and about to go down the slide. "Envy! Catch me!"
Envy blew his bangs up as he ran over to the bottom of the slide. "Alright, come on!" he called, holding his arms out in front of himself.
"Here I come!" Wrath pushed himself off and came sliding down. "Wheeeee!"
"Oof!" Envy fell back as Wrath collided with him, knocking both of them down onto the grass. "Wrath! How fast were you going?"
Wrath was busy giggling up a storm. "I dunno! Isn't it awesome?"
"For the love of-" Envy gathered Wrath in his arms, stood up, and then deposited the kid back down. "Go play on something safe! I'm gonna be on the bench watching you. Come over if you want something to eat or drink and... try not to get hurt. If you do, you come over here so I can fix it."
"Okay, Envy!" Wrath jumped up and hugged Envy around the neck, practically gagging him, before racing off to some other part of the playground.
Envy shook his head and reached into the drawstring bag with a smirk. How could Sloth have not noticed him put his book in there? He grabbed it and opened to his bookmark. "Heh-heh, come to me, Invidia, you seductress you..."
Envy glanced up, a lollipop from the bag stuck in his mouth, and rolled his eyes when he saw Wrath... holding hands with some girl. "What do you want, Wrath? You didn't get hurt, did you?"
"Nuh-uh." Wrath brushed his bangs back, and then looked over at the girl, a slight blush spreading across the bridge of his nose. "Ummm, this is Brianne."
"Brianne, this is my big brother Envy," Wrath continued, talking now to the little blonde he was holding hands with.
"That's your brother?" Brianne blinked a few times. "His clothes look like my big sister's!"
"You didn't think mine did."
"Well, um, 'cause you actually look good. Plus you're not wearing a skirt."
"It's a skort!" Envy growled, before putting his book back in the bag. "Now, please tell me all you wanted was to introduce me to your little friend?"
(A/N: Insert "FRIENDS!" thing from Fish Hooks. Kukukuku... ^w^)
"No. Um, Brianne showed me the swingset." Wrath pointed backward at said swingset. "And it's really fun. I like it."
"Will you come push us? It's hard to get going."
"Why don't you ask Brianne's big sister?"
"She's at the mall," Brianne responded. "Please, En-En?"
Envy mentally smacked himself. "Only if neither of you ever calls me that again."
Envy gave a longing gaze to his book before getting up and following the two kids. "Bye, Invidia..."
Envy pushed on both Wrath's and Brianne's backs, at the same time. He couldn't understand why they had to do it at the same time, make him exert more energy...
"Wheeee!" Wrath laughed. "Envy, you should try this! Haven't you ever swung before?"
"No, I haven't."
"Soooo do it!" Wrath was about as high as he could swing, and he jumped off.
"Kid!" Envy shouted, horrified. What the hell was he doing? He was going to get hurt and then Sloth was going to murder him!
To his shock, Wrath landed safely in a crouching position. "Woo-hoo!"
"Yay, Wrathy!" Brianne shrieked, shaking the chains on her swing.
"Come on, Envy!" Wrath pointed to the hot seat he'd just been in. "You try it!"
Envy sighed. "Will it make you happy so you don't scream to Sloth about how terrible I was?"
"Fine." He walked around and sat down in it. "Now what... do I just push off?"
"Walk back in the swing, till you're as far back as you can, then just kinda lift your feet up. It'll make you go forward. Then you pump your legs, like Brianne's doing."
"Okay, okay..." Envy did as he was told and suddenly, he was propelled forward. He felt the air rush past his face and he was assaulted with the feeling of... flying. He'd never flown before, and everything was cool as it cut across his face. It was actually kind of nice. The only thing that he didn't like was that weird feeling in his stomach...
"Oh God!" Envy half-stumbled off the swing and hurried over to some nearby bushes. "Gonna hurl!"
Wrath looked at Brianne, and then walked over to Envy. "Hey Envy, does everything make you sick?"
"There's my sister!"
Envy's eyebrow twitched as he tried to stand up. "Shit..." He looked over at Wrath. "Kid, I am gonna kill..."
"Hey, are you alright?" came a new, more mature feminine voice.
"I'm fine!" Stupid humans, he thought with a snarl as he got up, wiping his mouth.
Then he laid eyes on her. She was a brunette, with dark eyes. She had a white dress on, and if he squinted hard enough, she looked the littlest bit like that picture of Invidia he'd seen. Maybe the brat and Brianne were good for something after all.
She blinked a few times, and waved her hand in front of his face. "Hello? Um..."
"Huh, what?" He shook his head. "Oh sorry... I kinda just threw up."
"I see that." She looked down at Brianne, who was currently hugging her waist, and smiled a little. "Anyway, I'm glad you and your brother were here. Brianne doesn't have many friends, and she's really shy. I'm happy she found one."
"Hey... no problem. Uh..." He held out his hand. "Everyone calls me Envy."
She shook it, the smile fading a bit. "Samantha, but... don't call me that. It's Sam."
"Okay. So, uh... see you later, I guess."
"Alright, bye." She took Brianne's hand and began walking away.
"Bye-bye, Brianne!" Wrath yelled after her.
"Bye-bye, Wrathy!" Brianne yelled back.
Envy rubbed his forehead and looked over at the clock on the building across the street. "So, uh... we've still got a few minutes till Sloth gets back."
Wrath tugged on Envy's skort and grinned. "Um, Envy...? I gotta go potty."
Great. Now Envy had to find a restroom. Perfect day.