A/N: Hello again Doctor Who fans! LOL I have written another DRiver fic, much shorter than my last XD haha. Okay so if you don't really like or agree with this sorry, I really wanted to write something - anything - so my friend challenged me to write a fic about phobia sooo I chose this lol. Hope you guys like it, thanks to Rei for challenging me and please tell me what you think - good or bad

Enjoy!


Streams of tears fell down her face as she connected wires together and set the computer on count down. She began to wonder what in the name of sanity she was doing. Then her eyes fell upon the unconscious, handcuffed body of her lover's younger self and she smiled.

Professor River Song - ex-con, former doctor and currently one of the most respected professors in her profession - was getting read to sacrifice herself for the man she was to love in the future. She couldn't help but laugh at the irony as she strapped herself to the chair, knowing the Doctor would wake up soon.

For as long as she could remember she had a horrible, life taking fear that followed her through out most of her life - philophobia. The fear of falling in love.

As a teen, and a few years as an adult, she feared she'd fall in love with some god forbidden man. She knew what love did you. It made you crazy. It made you do things you'd never normally do. It made you put your life on the line for any person you loved, which was something she never wanted to do.

That's why she was alone for a while. Every time her boyfriends got too close or too cozy she'd find something terrible wrong with them and leave. Whenever a friend or family member got to comfortable for her, she'd find an excuse to run off and never come back.

Somehow though, all her methods of evasion disintegrated when she met this one impossible man.

She tried everything to leave. She made up excuses, lies, broke laws, items, everything, just to get away from him, but some how he managed to lasso her back.

It was so painful to leave him time after time, but the fear that he would be the man she fell for frightened her much more and she was sure she'd get over the pain like always.

But that impossibly brilliant man managed to get her over the opposite of her goal.

Countless times he risked his life to protect her, but once his incarnation died to save her, that's when she knew he loved her.

Then, when he was at the end of his lives and she risked her life for him, she knew she had fallen into the same trap... and she loved it. She wasn't afraid anymore. She knew that time and time again she'd do anything for this man - even die - because in that very moment she knew that if she had to choose between death or a life without him, she'd die any day and that's what love was. It wasn't a spell that makes you do things you wouldn't do. It's a feeling that unlocks your full potential on everything you can do.

As she said her final words to the young Doctor, memories of their adventures and risks to come flashed into her head. She had on countless occasions put her life on the line for him, and here she was again, ready to die for the man she loved. As she sat in the chair, ready to go she smiled a sad smile knowing this would be her last.

Then, with one last breath she whispered to him, "Spoilers."


There it is. I hope you guys liked it and please tell me what you think - love or hate - the feedback is always appreciated.

-Jess Vic