Title: Cure for Love
Author's comments: This fic is inspired by another story written by saone called A Dream is a Wish Your Demon Makes - a series, which can be found here: . Permission was given to post this story.
"I thought you might want to talk… about… I mean… How are things?"
"I'm not going to do it."
"Why should I take one for the team just so Buffy can have her honey back?"
"You're right, it's not fair."
"I will, I'll kill him if it comes to that."
"If you have to."
"Buffy will just have to live without him. We can't always get what we want, you know."
"You don't really think I should… sleep with him, do you?"
"I don't know, Xander."
"Because I don't think I can. Not even to help Buffy. I'll have to kill him."
"Then Spike and Drusilla win. Angel dies and Buffy's going to be destroyed."
"That's not my fault!"
"I'm not saying it is."
"What are you saying?"
"Just that… what does it really cost you to-to have sex with Angel?"
"The answer's in the question, Willow."
"I mean… you know what I mean! If we end up having to kill Angel, Angel loses his life and Buffy loses him--"
"And all I lose is my heterosexual male membership card? No, thanks. I'm not riding the Angel pony."
"Um… maybe he doesn't have to… uh, you know, maybe you could do that to him?"
Xander half grunted and half laughed and said, "Oh yeah, and I'm sure when Angel gets his sanity back he won't mind that I took advantage of him. Besides, he doesn't do a thing for me."
"Oh… Oh! You're right! It would be like you…"
"Either way it's all nonconsensual. Even if you let him--"
"Play Sonny to my Cher?"
"--Angel still won't like the fact that you two had sex in any variation."
"And neither will Buffy. Then we're agreed: I kill Angel, nobody gets deflowered, and everybody's happy… almost."
"I already told Buffy about the counter--"
"You did what?"
"We couldn't not tell her, Xander!"
"Buffy has a right to know!"
"Oh my god!"
"She says if it's the only way to get Angel back--"
Buffy was in a very bad mood.
She caught the first vampire's fist in the palm of her hand then squeezed, crushing his knuckles to powder before lashing out with her right leg, burying her heel in his abdomen. The second vampire rushed her from behind and Buffy quickly brought her foot away from the first vamp's stomach and kicked the second in the chest. He went flying backwards, the sound of his ribs breaking almost drowned out the vampire's scream of pain.
Buffy twisted the first vampire's arm and flipped him to the ground, staking him. Her hand closed around dust as she made a fist and brought her arm up to block the kick from a third vampire trying to land a blow to her head. She grabbed the vamp's ankle and pulled hard, tugging his legs out from under him and brought him to the ground in front of her.
"Why do all the wrong vampires keep falling for me?"
Buffy rolled forward over the grass beside the sprawled vamp and stopped when her stake plunged into his chest. She jumped up and turned to the remaining vampire. He was hobbling away as fast as his legs and broken ribs would allow towards a small group of trees. Buffy threw her stake into his back and watched it lodge into the trunk of the tree in front of him. She walked over the ground where the last vamp's dust rested, retrieved her stake and slipped it into the pocket of her jacket.
Just when I think things couldn't possibly be any worse… ho-ho, Life gives Buffy Summers a swift kick in the ass to set her straight!
She put up a nice front and acted like Xander and Angel doing the no-no cha-cha didn't phase her after Willow told her about the counter to the spell put on Angel, but emotionally she was tearing her hair out by the roots. I'm going to dust Spike and Drusilla for this! No. I'm going to nail em' both to crosses outdoors set up a lawn chair and video cam, one of those new digital thingies, and wait for the sun to come up. And I'm gonna watch them fry every night before I go to bed.
Xander stood behind her with his hands shoved deep into his coat pockets. Xander tried to smile at her but his lips couldn't quite make it happen. "Xander."
"You know, I could just--"
"You didn't let me finish!" Xander exclaimed walking up to the Slayer.
"If it's a choice between you sleeping with Angel, or killing him to stop him from raping you, I choose the one where everybody comes out unharmed."
"Unharmed. Having sex with Angel will definitely harm me."
"Not if you do it right," Buffy said.
"Don't say things like that! It creeps me out hearing you say things like that!"
"Sorry. Just trying to help," Buffy mumbled and began walking away. Xander watched her retreating back and frowned before trotting to catch up with her.
"Okay, I can't believe I have to say this, but… I'm not going to boff your boyfriend."
"Why not? Be the end of your problems."
"Then I'd end up with a whole host of other problems, wouldn't I? The biggest one besides having slept with a vampire being that I might lose one of my best friends. One of my only friends."
"Xander… I'm not going to stop being your friend. And I wouldn't expect you to go on living under a threat just to spare my feelings."
"How's Angel going to feel about it?"
"I… I think he's not going to like it. But he wouldn't want to hurt you either."
"Because we're bestest buds!"
Buffy glared at Xander. "He may not particularly like you, but Angel wouldn't do anything to really harm you."
"A vampire that won't do anything to really hurt me, huh? Kind of goes against type."
Buffy rolled her eyes. Leave it to Xander to cover this ground again. "Angel has a soul, Xander. Which means he has a conscious."
"A conscious never stopped real people from doing bad things, Buffy. And to tell you the truth, I don't buy that whole cursed with a soul bit, either."
"It doesn't matter anyway," Xander said. "I rather take my chances. 'Cause ain't no way Angel's getting a piece a dis!"
"Wow, I think he doth protests too much!"
"No, I just… Hey!"
"Yep, you know what they say: the squeakiest wheel needs the most greasing."
"Wait a minute--"
"It's okay, Xander, we'll all still love you if you decide you prefer the touch of a man."
Xander laughed nervously. "Very funny, Buffy. Stop now."
Buffy smirked. "You're going to sleep with my boyfriend, I think I have a right to point and mock."
"I'm not going to sleep with Angel!"
Buffy sighed. "Why take the chance?"
"How am I supposed to live with myself afterwards? Do you think I'll be able to look you, Willow, or Giles in eye again?"
"It'll be worse if…"
Buffy stopped and so did Xander, Buffy looked at him. "Xander… I love you, you know that, right?"
"Good. Then the truth is I can forgive you for having sex with Angel, even be grateful because you would've done it to set things right at great cost to your sensibilities. But if you make it so I have to kill Angel because you hate him and don't think his life is worth it, and hate my being with him—no, don't deny it—a part of me will never forgive you."
Xander and Buffy began walking again in silence through the cemetery. Xander stared at the grass while Buffy medially searched the shadows for any demons that might jump out at them.
"What if I'm just afraid?" Xander finally asked.
"Then be afraid. I'm not trying to tell you how to feel or what to do," Buffy turned her head and gave Xander a small smile. "I'm just telling you how I feel about this whole sorry mess."
They continued traipsing among the tombstones, wordlessly.
"But… sex… with Angel…"
"I don't think it'd be horrible at all." Buffy stared off into the darkness with a wistful gleam in her eyes.
Xander made a face. "Yeah, yeah, so he's mildly attractive. Whatever. But does he have my sparkling personality or my expansive ability at witty repartee? He should be delighted to… what the hell am I saying?" Xander shook his head. "I'm not sleeping with Angel!"
"If not, at least do it for the right reasons."
"And here I was thinking not being gay was all the reason I needed."
"Okay, look at it this way. Let's say Angel never gets out of control there's still the original spell to deal with, and Angel's going to be around for a long time. So for the rest of your life he'll be trying to woo you with moonlight serenades, candy and flowers on Valentines Day, and love letters year after year. Decade after decade…"
"All right, all right!"
"So… you'll think about it?"
"I guess," Xander groaned. "Why can't you be the kind of girl that thinks if I can't have him all to myself no one else can have him at all?"
Buffy shrugged. "If the counter works Angel and I will be together."
"It might not be the same," Xander said quietly.
"We love each other, that'll be enough to get us through."
Xander grimaced. "God, and I thought Giles telling me I had to screw Angel was the most puke worthy thing I've heard today."
Two days later, Xander found himself standing on Angel's doorstep rubbing his fingertips over the bite mark the Dagesse left in Angel's door frame. It was visible from the outside even with the door closed. The wood was warm from the sun.
I don't want to do this.
But I have to.
But I really don't want to.
Xander laughed. A month ago, hell, two months ago, he swore he'd do anything to get Angel to stop… anything. But now…
Xander raised his knuckles to knock on the door only to have the door opened a second before he could.
"I heard you laugh," Angel said, answering Xander's questioning glance.
"You come here to fit me for a vacuum cleaner bag?"
"That sounded like sarcasm," Xander commented. Then, with a sly smirk he said, "One might think you don't love me anymore."
"Giles wanted me to back off, so I am," Angel replied with no intonation in his voice whatsoever.
"Really? Can I come in? Promise I don't have a sword."
Angel stepped aside and let Xander pass.
"What's the stake for?" Angel asked.
"I said no sword."
"Cozy," Xander said, looking over the apartment.
"You cleaned up the blood."
"Why are you here?"
Xander turned and faced Angel. The vampire hadn't moved away from the door after closing it. Angel hands were behind his back and he was standing as still as the corpse he was, watching Xander utterly blank-faced.
"You're not going to offer me a drink?"
"Don't have anything you'd like."
"Oh… right. You went back to wearing black I see."
"You ruined my only white shirt and blue jeans."
"Sorry. You want to have sex?"
"Do you wanna have sex with me?"
"Well… I … Uh… well…"
"You silver tongued devil. I can see why all the girls fall for you," Xander drawled. He turned away from Angel and rounded a corner into the bedroom area and sat on a bed that looked too small for Angel.
"You take that whole contrition thing pretty serious, Angel. This mattress doesn't look like it's very comfy for ya. It'll have to do, I guess."
Angel poked his head around the corner, his eyes widening when he saw Xander on the bed.
"Come here, Angel. I'm not the one who bites," Xander said patting the space on the mattress beside him.
"That's right, as soon as we get our clothes off."
Angel stepped into full view. "Why are you doing this to me?"
"Playing on my feelings for you?"
"I'm not playing you, Angel."
"Then why the act? Are you trying to get me to lay down so staking me will be easier?"
Xander grinned. "I don't know where this lack of trust comes from."
Angel crossed his arms over his chest, not amused.
Xander heaved in a deep breath and reached behind his back and pulled the stake out from his waistband then threw it past Angel into the living room area. "Satisfied?"
"Don't do this."
"God! Don't do what?"
"Get my hopes up that you really want me."
"Okay, let's get this straight, ha, right off to bat: I don't want you. The only reason I'm offering is to break the spell put on you so I get my life back and you get to be your regular cradle robbing self for Buffy."
"Now I know you aren't being honest. You're saying I'm not really in love with you like you always do, which means you're trying to fool me again."
Xander threw his head back and let out a frustrated shout.
"Xander, I do want to be with you, and I long for the day when you'll sincerely want to be in my bed. But if you keep toying with my heart…"
Xander slowly stood up from the bed and walked up to Angel. He looked down, grimaced, then looked up again then down and shook his head. When he brought his face up again Xander leaned forward and pressed his lips against Angel's. Angel remained inert as Xander kissed him, his mouth stiff and unresponsive.
I'm kissing a guy. I'm… kissing… a… guy. I'm kissing Angel. I can't do this!
No, it has to be today! Don't know if I can work my courage up like this again! Xander resolved and kept pressing himself into the other man. Angel moaned and curled his arms about Xander's waist. Xander knew it wouldn't take long, the spell was too compelling. Xander reluctantly parted his lips and allowed the vampire to slip his tongue into his mouth. Encouraged, Angel moved his hands down to Xander's buttocks and squeezed them gently.
Whoa! Watch the hands pal! Xander reached behind him and brought Angel's hands back up to his waist. Angel pulled back. "You've finally admitted it," he said.
Xander nodded and pasted a nice, big fake smile across his face. "Sure have. Let's take this to the bed."
Angel shook his head. "No."
"Angel… sweety… what do you mean, no?"
"We can't make love yet," Angel said grinning down at Xander.
"No, of course not! I've been waiting so long for you to accept my love for you I think we should do this right."
"I think we need to date first."
"What?" Xander asked sharply.
"Yes! It'll be so much better if we build a solid foundation for our relationship first. I want to take you out to romantic dinners, to all the movies you want to see and spend whole nights just talking--" Angel raised his eyebrows. "Have you ever been to Paris? We can take a romantic trip to Paris!"
"But, Angel, dear, we're already so deeply in love do we need to prove it by… dating? Can't we just take this to the next level already?"
Angel laughed as he grabbed either side of Xander's waist, lifted him off the ground, and began twirling around. "No, that can wait. I want us perfect."
Xander lips tightened into a thin line and he narrowed his eyes at Angel as they spun about.
"Put me down, you idiot!"
"Just put me down!"
The moment his feet touched the floor Xander stomped over to the door.
"Xander, where are you going?"
Xander walked outside and slammed the door. He stood there for a full minute breathing heavily. Then he started pacing back and forth in front of Angel's apartment, muttering obscenities.
Xander stopped then turned his face up to the sky and…