Innocent Life: The Final Goodbye
written by blueheaven21
Watching the tears form in her eyes managed to break my heart…
She was a human who loved me more than she could and more than she knew she would. A smile was always plastered in her face whenever I would see her come by the house, visiting me or father whenever she had the time from school. But this time, a frown was visible on her beautiful features…
That only I could have caused.
Heart Flame Island was a home that the town citizens loved, along with their strong beliefs of the island spirits that protected the island from harm. I lived on the island, working as a fellow farmer in the Easter Ruins, trying to know more about the beauty of life as much as I could. The island where I stay is one of the precious things I have in my heart.
The man who I call as my father, Dr. Hope Grain, taught me the ways of life and the only person who knew me as much as I knew myself.
For the past years of my life after Dr. Hope died, I have worked as hard as I could with my farm and continued on with the doctor's research. I protected the island from destruction with all the crops I grew from the request of the Fire Spirit. I did all the tasks the Fire spirit could have given me and she soon began to trust me. Between the work and tasks she gave me, I found myself learning about human feelings. And also, the time came when I have come to have my own as well. Sadness, happiness and all sorts of emotions ran wild within me.
It was spring now and it was now my sixth year here in Heart Flame Island. I knew I haven't aged unlike the townspeople who have. But even though they knew this fact, it didn't bother them as they accepted me as their equal as I to them. The first outsider who knew about me unexpectedly was a long time friend of mine. Marcia. Hearing that name would usually bring music to my ears.
She was there. In her usual seat whenever she ate her dinner in Mushroom Park. I noticed Lionel wasn't there to spy on her and it somehow made me smile, knowing the guy had a major crush on her back when they were kids and he still do.
She notices my presence just as the sun was setting down the horizon, her usual smile on her lips. I could see a glint in her eyes that she was about to tell me something.
I knew her too well. From the day she started befriending me unto this day, I've known a lot of things about her that she doesn't know about herself. Soon, the time came when I noticed that she held feelings for me that she didn't want anyone to know. I acted as if I didn't know about it and continued on. From twelve years old, she soon became eighteen. Everything about her; her features and her body changed from a young girl to a grown woman. She matured, growing her hair long that reached up to her mid-back.
I reached up to stroke it, closing her eyes as if she was savoring the moment of my touch. She grew taller than me but somehow I knew that it didn't bother her that I was still a twelve-year old boy. The thing that only mattered to her was that I was there beside her. She was never a selfish girl…
"I have something to tell you Life." she started speaking softly.
I could see her fidgeting in her seat, hesitating on what to say. And I knew what she was going to say next. The three words I half wished she would never tell me. Those words would only bring her heartbreak that I didn't want to happen to her.
"We've been friends since we first met each other and even though you're a robot… I still have feelings for you." Her voice held such determination that she wasn't aware about. "I love you, Life. I care so much about you that I wish you will be with me forever."
The corners of my mouth lifted into a half-smile. My hands made its way to caress her cheek. She was waiting for an answer that I was afraid to give. Was I ready to give her the answer? My mind already has it and I'm hesitating to give her the answer. But I knew I had to. She's human while I'm a robot.
"Marcia…" She waited patiently as I ducked my head, afraid to tell her my feelings. "I love you too…"
"But?" she whispered. I got the feeling that she knew what I was about to say but she still waited with patience eyes.
"But…" I gave a long sigh. "I'm no good for you Marcia."
"But you are!"
Tears started welling up in her eyes and there was nothing I could do to stop it from falling. But I have to be strong; for myself and for her. I lifted my hand and wiped the tears away from her eyes. I could feel her trying to calm her composure.
"No, I'm not…I can't give you anything you need and I can't give what you deserve. I can't give you children. When you grow old, I won't be the same like you. My age will never change. I would still be a twelve-year old boy to you. And when you disappear, I won't be following you up there." I said in a gently voice, caressing her face like it was a fragile glass.
She was quiet. Silence, I gathered from people, was never a good thing. The wind picked up, ruffling my bronze hair as it picked up and blew Marcia's blond-hair. She finally came to a decision when she sighed, wiping her tears with the back of her hand. She smiled but it came as a grimace.
"Okay…" she said simply. "But can you do me a favor?"
"Yes, I can do that."
"Please, give me one last hug before I let go of you…"
It was a simple request; a request that I could do for her. I brought her in my open arms, wrapping my arms around her body. She held unto me as tightly as she could. She was a young woman now while I'm still the same twelve-year old boy from six years ago. That was a fact that she had to accept.
I finally let go after a few minutes, knowing if I didn't, I could never let her go. I smiled at her when she got up. For her last good-bye, she gave me a peck on the cheeks before walking down the park.
Years have passed since then and I was happy to see Marcia looking well. She was back to her cheerful self. The tension between me and her soon vanished after a few months as we still maintained our friendship. I still held feelings for her but I knew that she could never love me for long. I attended her wedding ceremony with her soon-to-be husband. I watched the life shone brightly in her eyes as she enjoyed her special moment with Lionel.
It became clear that I wished it was me with her right now. I felt a hand touch my shoulder and I turned my head to see Vita giving me a smile. She knew what I was feeling and asked me if I wanted to go back home. I nodded numbly, leaving the girl I have ever wanted in the arms of another man.
Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months and months turned into years. Spring slipped by and I found out that Marcia was now pregnant with her first child.
My life, at that point, decided that I should work even harder than before. I maintained good relationships with the spirit sprites, hermit and island spirits aside from the townspeople. I worked hard, earning more money for me, the research Dr. Hope left behind and for my farm. Everyday, I would ride on my buggy and go off deep into the forest to give my usual visit to the hermit that lived beside Mermaid Lake or I would just pick up some fruits I could ship for my farm.
I later found out that Marcia gave birth to a healthy baby girl and I rushed to her house, to see her in her bed, Lionel, her friends and the rest of the family with her with a baby wrapped in a bundle. I could see the sweat on Marcia's forehead and I could also see that she was tired, but the happiness in her face when she looks at her baby made me sigh in happiness.
Summer then rolled in, and Marcia gave me a sudden visit with her toddler in her arms. We started talking like the old times and she was becoming more and more beautiful each time I saw her. And I could see whenever she looks at her child lovingly: she was now a mother.
"How are you really doing Life?" she had asked me once when I escorted her to the gates. I knew what she meant behind those words and I couldn't help but smile.
"I'm fine, really." I replied with a shrug.
As we reached the gates, I saw Lionel waving at us. Before they left, Marcia gave me a worried glance. She must've seen the way I was eyeing them and maybe she must have felt the jealousy inside of me. I wanted a family with her. And she knew that.
Years slipped away from me as all the townspeople grew older and so did Marcia while I stayed the same. Vita soon left me after her years of serving my father and me. But before she died, she asked a niece of hers, Julia, to help me in the household and that her niece already knows about me. I managed a small smile when I looked at her grave. Still responsible as ever.
By then, the children in town grew up to be adults one by one. All of them knew I was a robot but still accepted me as an equal. I still continued on with my work with a new housemaid with me. The old people in Volcano town left this world one by one with old age.
Another year for me soon dawned. It was just like any other year. I wouldn't grow old and the people around me were, and I found myself becoming lonelier. Little did I know that the worst was still coming.
Autumn came and I was in a black suit with Julia beside me. I was staring at a grave that made my heart shatter to pieces. Marcia's daughter Maria, together with her husband, kids and close friends, cried for the loss of her dear mother. My mind went blank as I continued to stare at the grave with Marcia's name written on it. A wave of sadness washed over me as I felt my throat go dry and my head start to ache. Marcia. The girl who grew to be a fine woman and a loving mother to me was now gone from my life. This was the day I prayed that would never come.
"Master Life," I heard Julia call, touching my back to soothe me from the pain I was feeling. Julia was one of the few people who knew about my undying love for Marcia and I could feel her eyes pitying me from behind. "It's time for us to leave too."
I noticed that everyone left already, leaving me and Julia behind. I was too hurt to move. The pain and regret was too much to bear as I stood, hands clenched into fists.
"Julia…you can go on without me. I need to be left alone for awhile…" I whispered brokenly.
I lost a lot of people in my life. Dr. Hope, Vita and Marcia were among them. And I was the only who could never die, no matter how much I wanted to join them. I felt the presence of the sprites from afar, looking at me with sad eyes. I was just like them; never growing old and never dying.
I could see the face of Marcia in her deathbed burning in my mind. Even though she knew she was dying, she still kept smiling, telling me not to be sad and try to live my life to the fullest even though she knew it would never end. I started to cry. The tears were now falling down my cheeks. I knelt down on the ground when my feet couldn't carry my weight any longer.
I just cried, letting all my frustration of regret and pain go out. I screamed her name, begging to her not to leave. But it was hopeless. She was never coming back.
And with that, I said my final goodbye to the only girl whom I have ever loved and went back to my home with the only thing in my mind: I will never grow old. I'll always be a twelve-year old boy forever.