Title: Tale of a Regressing Sadist, or alternatively: Ｓ物語 (Praise my bad Japanese! -brick'd-)
Word count: about 3,900, oneshot
Genre: Romance, partial smut (ie, that one part touches the other part but I don't really describe what those parts are or what they're doing with them. It's all very vague.), bad comic attempts, fluff and some half-arsed serious-face moments.
Disclaimer: I do not own Aitsu no Daihonmei. Rights belong to Tanaka Suzuki and Be Boy Magazine. This story is NON-PROFIT entertainment.
Summary: At the warning of a classmate, Satou begins to worry that his torturing might just be pushing Yoshida away, and begins a straggling journey to try and better his ways.
Warnings: Implications and acts of sex, expressed cuddling/fondling, and if steamy kissing isn't up your alley of interest, don't read this. Nothing explicit, though, but I certainly could have gone that way, or might in the future. And in case you've stumbled upon this by accident and aren't in-tune with the more fun side of fandom, this all happens between two guys. Satou also thinks some decidedly S&M things. Look it up. Also, there might be a swear word hiding somewhere. Shield your eyes, hide yo kids, hide yo wives!
Satou was currently leafing through an old magazine in a class he, regrettably, didn't share with Yoshida, but one that he also didn't have with too many girls that fancied him in an annoyingly absurd and distracting way. He wasn't even all too sure what the magazine was about, but it did have a nice looking collar and matching leash being advertised that he felt would look perfect slung around Yoshida's slender neck. For probably too long, he stared at it in contemplation, turning his head this way and that, while he thought of all the tears Yoshida would shed in embarrassment.
While doting on his imagination's crying Yoshida, he failed to notice someone approaching him from the left. When he did, he tried to put on an accommodating face, but when he saw the expression of sadness set in the girl's eyes, he found it hard to think of anything more than, Annoying.
"Satou-kun," she whispered, at the same time he placed the name 'Inoue' to her being. "Who's your favorite?"
"Ah," he expressed, not exactly sure what to say, but bored nonetheless. Girls came at him every day asking for his attention, whispering behind his back the very question she had just so abruptly asked with no hesitation. "So you've come to ask that."
"I think I know who it is, but I can't be sure. I wanted to ask… because I don't want to assume."
She seemed honest in the question, enough that Satou actually humored the idea of telling her the truth. He could tell her that he was irrevocably infatuated with Yoshida, the very person she sometimes confided in when it came to their old classmate with the frightening face. He knew that her feet would shuffle even more so than now, that her face would scrunch in surprise, her mind would whirl in anger, and she would, predictably, go and vent her anger on Yoshida like all the other girls in their school.
"Is it Yoshida?"
Satou's mind blanked for a brief moment.
Without thinking, he accidentally blurted, "Why would you think that?"
Her eyes widened just the slightest, before a small smile bloomed on her charming, feminine face. Her hands wrung themselves together in an emotion he couldn't place properly, thinking it was probably between irritation, depression or nervousness.
"I thought so," she said simply, refusing to look him in the eye, in favor of staring down at her feet. "I'm sorry if I came off as rude."
"Don't worry," he recited by reflex alone, smiling easily without it reaching his eyes, propping his chin on his hand in a way he knew was attractive. "There've been worse questions."
"You're very different when you're around him, you know. That smile actually means something when it's for him."
Again, she said something difficult that Satou wasn't sure how to answer without sounding ridiculous. He silently cursed her, dropping his smile just slightly. Inoue seemed more confident in her posture now, even as she was being glared at by the other girls that occupied the room with venom in their eyes. Her bravery impressed him, especially since she wasn't accompanied by a fellow drone, but not so much that he was willing to praise her for it.
"What do you mean?"
"Yoshida's a good person, a good friend," she continued, disregarding his question entirely. "He really likes you."
Figuring he wouldn't be answered either way, he concluded that he would remain silent until she gave him an answer he wanted. Satou already knew Yoshida liked him, but the fact that she was so observant made him itch with possessiveness that rooted from not wanting Yoshida's loving expression to be seen by anyone but him.
"…but I'm not sure that you like him as much," she whispered more tersely than before, shoulders quaking from the effort it obviously took to confront her crush with such a voice and accusation. "He adores you, even goes so far as to endure the abuse the girls in this school put him through, the abuse that you start by lying to get away from them. He tolerates your pranks, Satou-kun, because it's the only attention you openly give him, even if he really does hate it. He ignores the girls that fawn over you, that you don't even try to push away because you like their attention, despite having Yoshida's already. And he refuses people like Nishida,"
While listening to her accusations and complaints with ease, as they rolled off her tongue like a badly rehearsed play that he found repulsive, his fists clenched when the mention of someone like Nishida came up, and he almost turned to ignore her, but she continued, determined to get her words out.
"…that wouldn't hide that he loves Yoshida in public, and wouldn't share the attention he could give him with girls, just for the sake of looking cool."
The atmosphere was crackling with Satou's anger, but amazingly, the girl didn't seem deterred. Inoue looked remorseful, looking at her crush with an heir of pity and beseeching arrogance.
"What do you mean?" he asked again, voice booming despite it being so low, and causing a few girls to let out a screech that wavered between fear and worship. "None of this is your business, you foolish girl."
"I mean that you need to try harder, Satou-kun… or you're going to lose him."
With that, she walked away, leaving Satou with a truly frightening look that melted into pure, unadultered surprise. The hand cradling his chin fell to the desk, gripping at the side, but he knew that he would never lose Yoshida, because he'd never allow it. It wasn't that he was a freak or a stalker and would demand Yoshida's love by threatening him with claims to cover his body in hot oil, but…
He would try, because he would not lose his favorite because of anyone, especially himself.
The next day, as he was walking into the school building to a class he was undoubtedly going to be late for because of his fitful, sleepless night, Satou walked passed and interrupted something that only steeled his resolve.
Yoshida was talking animatedly with Nishida, smiling fully like a small child.
After stalking over, grabbing Yoshida and consequently dragging him away from his own stupidity (really, how could he voluntarily talk to Nishida and not know what it was going to lead to?), he vowed to try harder at avoiding everything Inoue accused. He was already gentler with Yoshida than any other person he'd been sexually interested in, so of course he could pull off something a little less enjoyable for himself, if it meant Yoshida not straying off to worse prospects, like Nishida or possibly Yamanaka, even if he had taken care of him already.
"Yoshida," he called sweetly the next day, holding out a box of chocolates that Yoshida eyed warily. "Will you share these with me?"
"You're incredible. You think I'd actually fall for that again?" Yoshida asked, looking offended in a completely adorable way.
Satou had the incredible urge to whisper offensive threats into his ear, to make him feel such dread that his eyes overflowed with tears that would roll down his flushed cheeks in a way Satou could never resist, but he refrained. Inoue's warning echoed in his head, making him see all shades of red when thinking of Nishida, and then blue from sadness that stemmed from a primal fear from his childhood. He shook it away, knowing it hadn't affected him that badly, but there was still that chance, one that he wouldn't take.
"I'm not eating those," he asserted, backing away. "I'll have to mooch water off of Nishida again."
"Ah, in that case, you should know that these are perfectly normal chocolates," Satou promised, opening the box and taking one out for himself.
"I said I'm not falling for it, you heathen!"
After Yoshida stomped off, Satou predicted that Yoshida was not one to be fooled thrice, even if they were noticeably milder pseudo-chocolates. He pawned the chocolates off to some unsuspecting classmate, and got a disappointing reaction that made him pine for Yoshida's sweet, horror-stricken face even more.
"Satou… I don't know what it is, but you seem to be acting strange these days. I mean stranger than usual."
"Oh? Is that so…" Satou muttered, stealing a potato chip from a bag in Yoshida's lap.
After a tiring day of school and finally being able to shake off Satou's rabid girls, they managed to make it to Satou's room unharmed and looking no worse for wear, though Satou was in a particularly foul mood. For all his good, honest work in trying to be more kind to Yoshida, and ignoring his urges to force the cutest faces out of him, he didn't seem to be getting anywhere. While Yoshida was incredibly naïve when Satou was in the process of doing something horrible to him, he was also unaware when Satou was going out of his way to do something nice. So much that he didn't notice at all.
Thus, he just popped in a movie that was only vaguely interesting (instead of a good, traumatizing horror flick) in hopes of pleasing Yoshida, or make him more likely to come over without force or clever coaxing next time. Satou was bored and frustrated.
"You didn't even put in a horror movie, like you usually do."
"You don't like horror movies."
Yoshida looked peeved when he replied, "And when have you ever cared about that?"
"I usually don't, but I figured you'd want to watch something without having to hide behind a pillow the entire time, or run out of the room only to run back in and climb into my lap out of freight."
Talking about it only made his hunger worsen, and Satou immediately put his head down onto the low-risen table in front of them. On screen there was an American, Japanese-dubbed movie playing about people getting laid when he wasn't. It was apparently supposed to be funny, but he failed to see the humor in having your tooth pulled out, or finding a baby in your closet.
"You're a monster," Yoshida said in monotone. "But you usually enjoy that, don't you…?"
Satou grunted in response.
"So you wanted to do something that I wanted to do?"
"What have you done with Satou?"
"You just called me a monster, so obviously he's right here."
Satou received no response for a long while, and just when he was pondering he just might have done something wrong yet again with his unintended sarcasm, he heard Yoshida's hand rustling in the potato chip bag. Figuring the conversation was over, he continued to keep his head on the table and ignore everything around him. Apparently, Yoshida was just as good at catching Satou unaware as Satou was at feeding him carefully hidden jalapeños.
"Thanks," Yoshida mumbled, chomping down on another chip and returning to watch the movie.
When Satou looked up, he saw the ghost of a smile on Yoshida's lips, and the only regret that was left was that he'd been too late to see it form.
"Oh, it's Satou-kun!"
"Good morning, Satou-kun!"
"I can't take it; Satou-kun is just too godly to be among the rest of the hopeless guys here!"
Satou saw Yoshida sigh, along with hearing the rest of the males in the classroom deflate with their chorus of exasperation. His friends, however, seemed content to just bicker on about the girls being on another level than the girls of other high schools, which he had no problem agreeing with. They were insane, but essential to getting the very best out of Yoshida.
"When will it stop?" Yoshida complained, face going sour.
"If you keep making that face, it'll get stuck that way," Satou said pleasantly, grinning.
He leaned over into Yoshida's personal space, wanting to grab and pinch his face into some painful or amusing expression, but he contained himself for the nth time that week. Yoshida seemed torn between wanting to say something rude to him, or bursting out in a brilliant scarlet color that Satou deemed just as gratifying as painful face-pulling would, though less amusing.
"You're too close, Satou," Yoshida commented.
"Really? I don't think I'm close enough."
"Oh, are you two practicing your comedy act without Nishida?" asked the puffy-haired friend, before making some commentary about a girl in 4-e.
Yoshida looked relieved that they all just seemed to think of it as an act, but clearly did not appreciate Satou getting into his personal space when surrounded by mammals of their species, so he backed off obligingly. Again, Yoshida's expressions varied, but Satou figured it was his own fault for choosing obscurity rather than the blunt, glaringly obvious, truth.
Being their last class of the day, the sound of the school bell ringing brought a pleasant feeling among the classroom, akin to the relief that swept over Satou whenever the girls of their school were preoccupied. Along with him, the girls were following him, some more closely than others. It came as no surprise to Satou or the rest of the leering males of the class when they approached him, asking away.
"Satou-kun, are you free this afternoon? We were thinking of going down to the new ice-cream shop that opened and treating you!"
He paused in the hallway, secretly scanning for Yoshida. Finding him watching, leaning against a wall and talking with his plump friend, he replied, "Sorry, I'm already going with Yoshida."
Predictably, the girls started staring in outrage. Yoshida tensed with emotion, fear striking at the calm atmosphere of the halls.
"Did he make you promise again? That's not right, Satou-kun! He's always making you promise, knowing you're too kind to—"
"I made him promise me, actually."
Leaving the girls to foam at the mouth and ponder at his words, when it was as easy as just accepting the truth to realize what he meant by his proclamation, he walked toward Yoshida to properly ask him to a different ice-cream shop, knowing the girls would probably follow him otherwise. Yoshida accepted with a confused expression, glancing apprehensively at the dumb-struck mob of girls as they departed.
During the week, Yoshida had gone from questioning his every action to actually accepting it with no more than a small, "Did you really invite me to do this, or is this one of your schemes?"
Satou saw it as a victory, and felt that there was no way that Yoshida could ever think of going to other prospects like Nishida, though he'd never let him, anyway.
They chatted over ice-cream, and the happy faces Yoshida made when eating something sweet, while not being as satisfying as the ones he made when eating something sour or hot, was really quite nice. He swirled his tongue in expertise around the tip, and caught any stray drops from the bottom of the cone like a champion porn star, though Satou thought it to look a lot more perverse, since the action was so painfully innocent.
When he started humming around the spoon he used after having to resort to putting his large cone in a dish, Satou decided that having some form of sex was not just a question hanging in the air that day anymore. He would make it happen, just because Yoshida was doing something accidentally to him. It made the crime worse, somehow.
When a waiter came to hand Yoshida a napkin, preventing Satou's plan of licking his face clean from going through, he made sure to glare daggers and not tip the sorry bastard when they took their leave.
What wasn't stopped, however, was Satou walking close at Yoshida's side as they headed home. He leaned over and whispered into Yoshida's ear, and was pleased when small, blushing nod was his answer.
Yoshida was the only person Satou had ever been gentle with in bed. Every other person, every other mistake, he had only let out his sadistic nature. Rough, fast, and morally questioning acts and fetishes were all he indulged in with those other girls. It was all he craved with anyone, but with Yoshida it was different. Satou didn't have to pretend he didn't want to be sadistic with Yoshida, because he truly didn't when it came to lying in bed with him and merely touching his sides up and down in a small indulgence.
The way his breath would hitch was more rewarding than having someone on their knees, groveling for him. The way Yoshida leaned into him was more important than having someone plead to him for more.
Yoshida didn't wear frilly, disgusting perfumes, and he didn't cover himself in makeup to hide his face, even if people didn't appreciate it as much as they should have. Satou was free to nuzzle Yoshida's hair and smell the soft waft of his shampoo, and the light musk that was the product of their combined heat and grinding.
It wasn't quite night, so the moon wasn't high enough to shine on their half-clothed bodies, but Satou still found the light accommodating enough to watch the shadows push and pull across Yoshida's face as it moved in tune with his body. For the first time, Satou let his hands travel everywhere instead of just in one concentrated point. He couldn't tell whether Yoshida liked or disliked it, but judging by the way his breathing stopped and his heart pounded faster in his chest, he was sure it had done something. Satou's own heart had picked up pace considerably, and the smooth skin his palms touched was warm and pleasant.
By the time Yoshida was writhing against his chest and clutching the sheets in one hand like a lifeline, Satou was already gone, though with more composure than Yoshida, who was doing his best to hide the long, keening sound that left his throat against his drowning will.
When they were cleaned and Satou had lain back down, right next to Yoshida, he clasped his large hands around Yoshida's small face and pulled him close, wanting to kiss him. He did, and enjoyed the way their lips pressed even hotter against each other than they had previously. Yoshida was breathy, chest heaving with the effort it took to allow in the necessary amount of air to put all his effort into a decent kiss, and Satou was enjoying the way he so earnestly tried to be better at something he was already excellent at, in Satou's opinion.
"Only you," Satou whispered in a low murmur, smoothing his hands over Yoshida's flushed cheeks. "I can only be this gentle with you."
He refused to follow that statement with "because I don't want to break you", only because he knew it would do the same thing to the mood as before, and he desperately wanted to explore every soft, wet spot of Yoshida's mouth instead of bicker, no matter how exciting it was.
"Only you," Yoshida agreed, breaking apart for only a moment, though pressing the statement to his lips.
Yoshida leaned forward with enthusiasm, lips parted in a small gap that Satou took as an invitation. He made sure to become as familiar with Yoshida's mouth as he was with his own, and by the time he had finally pulled back up, he was overtop Yoshida, pressing him into the mattress beneath them and creating a small crater for their bodies to settle comfortably in. Yoshida was completely covered with Satou's body, hidden from the world in its shadow. His lips were puffy in a way that would have been attractive to anyone, not just Satou, and his hair was strewn all over his pillow, making sure his scent would be there for days. Yoshida's eyes were half-lidded in pleasure, his face red in much the same way and Satou predicted his entire body would be when he eventually leaned down and nipped his neck with vigor, before smoothing away the hurt with his tongue.
Satou was determined to not allow anyone else peer in on this side of Yoshida, no matter who they were, because it was a side that only he was allowed to be a part of.
It was after two weeks that Yoshida finally confronted him about his behavior, and by that time Satou was just starting to finally settle into a less-gratifying way of living, though he was sure he'd lapse right back into it, if given the chance.
"What's wrong?" Yoshida asked bluntly, not faltering in his steps.
"Hm? You're going to have to be more specific, Yoshida."
Taking a breath, Yoshida replied, "You haven't been blaming any of your avoidance issues on me, I haven't eaten anything potentially—no, definitely—hazardous to my health, my face hasn't been hurting from your constant pulling on it, the girls are teasing me more because you're being less cruel to me, and yeah, you're being less cruel to me. Or sadistic. Or less like your friend from middle school."
"I could starting pouring hot wax on you, if you'd like?"
"No! That's definitely not what I meant," Yoshida screamed.
"Then what did you mean?" he asked, even though Satou knew better than Yoshida did.
Yoshida thought for a moment, occasionally opening his mouth before snapping it shut again, before he finally ended his statement with, "…and on top of that, you haven't smiled or laughed in a long time. That's what I mean."
"But I haven't done anything cruel to you."
"So are you complaining, or are you happy?"
"I…" Yoshida trailed off, obviously pondering the answer himself, an answer that Satou cared a great deal about.
Satou waited patiently, only stopping in his easy steps when they paused for the light to signal they could cross the street, and again when they reached the intersection that branched off to two different roads, where they had to part. Yoshida was sucking his bottom lip into his mouth, shoulders slumping with the effort it took to scrounge up an answer.
"I don't know," he finally said, in a cop-out answer he usually used when he meant the exact opposite.
Or rather, when Yoshida didn't want to admit to something.
"I see," Satou replied, smiling. "Do you want to come over?"
Bucking up from his previous down-trodden emotions, he nodded and asked, "Yeah, any particular reason?"
"I just wanted you to try a new recipe I came up with. It's an Indian dish that tastes pretty good, but I added a few things of my own."
"Oh, so you do cook."
"Not really," Satou admitted, smirking to himself and thinking that the two weeks of boring, catering actions were finally worth something. "I was just hoping you'd try it."
Yoshida blushed brightly, but not nearly as brightly as he did that evening after tasting Satou's Indian-Japanese curry that covertly hid small, red peppers that had him crying and running to get water, only for it to make it worse.
All the while, Satou happily smiled wider than he had in a month, congratulated himself, and found himself relived at knowing that Inoue was positively, irrevocably wrong about Yoshida's feelings.
For all those wondering (or just confused by Satou's reasoning in the end), Yoshida saying "I don't know", really meant that he was unhappy that Satou was being nice, because in exchange for Yoshida's happiness he was making himself depressed. Yoshida didn't want to admit to it, just like he didn't want to admit to loving Satou because it wasn't the right atmosphere. This time though, he just didn't want Satou to know he preferred the torture over Satou being all grumpy and sad-face all the time. Aha. Oh, Yoshida, you lovely fool. I wanted Inoue to portray someone who was trying to do what she thought was right, though she was actually pretty off, since she doesn't know the entirety of their relationship besides what she sees in the classroom. Like how Yoshida is the one who denies public affection, not Satou.
I thought about making it Tsuyako, but… she really isn't the type to give Satou that kind of advice, especially since she's so observant and would see that their relationship is somewhat off-balance, but they both need to work harder at it, not just Satou. (Yoshida is too self-sacrificing and doesn't give as much as he takes affection, Satou doesn't think about Yoshida's feelings about his bullying enough, and is actually very selfish, though that's just my opinion. Yoshida should start some groping! Or take Satou to the movies! And Satou should join Yoshida in a bubble bath instead of giving him spicy chocolates! Even if it would be less fun…)
Moral of the story: Satou is a sadist, and Yoshida is a self-sacrificing fool. And, uh, be careful what you wish for, or some cliché like that, because you might just end up with a grumpy Satou instead.
I hope you enjoyed it! If not, I might lose my cool and need a shoulder to cry on. I'm serious. I'm all up for concrit though, because I'm the masochist to Satou's sadist.
Also, where's the rest of the fanfic? Really? Our fandom is awesome, WHERE ARE YOU WRITERS? If a procrastinator like me can do this much, I beg you to do more. Do it for our kami-sama, Zama! Or just me, because I'm a hermit who has nothing better to do.