With Friends Like These

Who needs enemies? The story of Ludwig and Felicia's wedding and their myriad of friends who try to ruin it for the hell of it. AU, fem!Italy.

As a note, Angelique is Seychelles, Katyusha is Ukraine, Mei is Taiwan, Liesel is Liechtenstein, Bella is Belgium, Charlotte is Monaco, Lien is Vietnam, Jack is Australia, and Emily is Wy.

A/N: This is just my little pet project I began writing out of boredom. Ignore the choppy writing, please.

Axis Powers Hetalia will probably never be mine. Ever.

"So, Feli..."

Elizaveta sat perched on her friend's bed, a determined tone in her voice. "Has he popped the question?"

Her friend stared at her with wide, innocent eyes. "Huh?"

"Ludwig," Natalia drawled from the duvet. "Duh."

Felicia flushed. "E-eh? What about him?"

Angelique, sprawled out on the plush carpet, grinned and toyed with her ink-black hair. "What Elizaveta means is that has Luddy gone down on one knee in the middle of a park, poured his heart out with some cheesy speech of love and presented some diamond ring from France or something?"

The brunette's look of confusion didn't vanish. "Angelique…what are you talking about?"

"Good God, Felicia, has Ludwig proposed or not?" Mei cried in frustration.

The young women gathered in the room laughed at Felicia's crimson face. When she didn't reply, Elizaveta snapped her fingers. "Aha! So that means he has!"

"W-what?" Felicia stammered, her face turning from confusion to understanding. "U-um, I-I suppose he has…"

That was all it took to get her friends screaming in joy. Shouts of "Oh my god!" and "Congratulations!" and "When's the wedding?" traveled around the large room.

"When did he propose?" Liesel, Ludwig's doe-eyed cousin, piped up, and that was all it took to get the girls to be quiet again, hanging on to Felicia's every word.

"The other day."

"Where?" Bella hissed, almost furiously.

"He took me to this really nice restaurant a few miles out of the city," Felicia narrated wistfully, all traces of embarrassment gone. "Then after that we went for a walk in the woods. Then there was this really pretty clearing, and…that's where he proposed."

"How?" Charlotte asked dryly. Among the girls, she was probably the one who least believed in love – and yet Felicia's story interested her anyway.

"Did he get down on one knee and spout some corny words?" Angelique snorted. "Oh, can't you just imagine him doing that…"

Her friends laughed. The thought of uptight, stern Ludwig kneeling and pouring his heart out via a flowery speech was too much to bear, and soon they were chuckling all around.

"Yes!" Felicia replied suddenly.


Then loud guffaws.

"Oh, I wish I was there!" Elizaveta sighed. "I could've videoed poor old Lud talking like that…"

"Blackmail," Natalia whispered to her older sister, who grinned good-naturedly.

"Did he give you a ring?" Liesel asked, which somehow managed to shush the girls again.

Feliciana nodded exuberantly. "Really, your family's so straightforward, Liesel," she told the younger girl. She raised her left hand. "See?"

"Oh, my god!"

"Can I look?"

"It's so pretty!"

Feliciana passed the diamond ring around the room, enjoying her friends' delighted stares. "Look at it," Lien gasped. "It's gorgeous!"

Charlotte eyed it. "He even ordered it from France," she whispered. After meeting her friends' surprised eyes, she gave them a half-hearted shrug. "What?"

"Can I see?" Emily, a little girl whom Elizaveta was currently babysitting and who'd agreed have her sitter's friends over, piped up. Feliciana handed the ring to her, and she lifted it to the sun.

"I love it, Felicia!" she explained, her warm eyes lighting up under thick eyebrows that shouldn't have been there. "When I grow up, I'd like to…"

There was a crash and a bang outside, and the door opened and Gilbert crashed into the room and crashed straight into Emily, who just happened to be sitting right under the large, open window. He was followed by Jack, who poked his head into the room and signaled his shocked little sister. "C'mon, squirt, time to go."

Nobody responded.

Eleven stunned faces followed the glint of the diamond all the way until it landed into the mud two stories below.

Elizaveta was the first to react. "Gilbert!" she roared. "What the fuck – " Liesel strategically covered Emily's ears – "are you doing in my house?"

Gilbert shot upwards and made a mad dash for the door, stepping on Jack's foot on the way. Emily picked up her stuff, said a quiet goodbye, and trailed after them. Her brother scanned the room, gave the surprised girls a half-hearted wave, and sprinted off after his sister.

Mei blinked and looked over at Feliciana, who was still staring at the window. "Now what?"

"Gilbert! You're alive!"

Antonio's eyes were sparkling like emeralds, and Francis' face had an amused expression on it on seeing Gilbert huff into his room. "Ah, Gilbert, I see you made it back, ma chere."

"No thanks to you," Gilbert spat, holding a hand over his throbbing temple. "'Oh, Gilbert, get Elizaveta ASAP!'" he mimicked in a high falsetto tone. "Alfred and Arthur are having another one of their hot makeout sessions! And what do I get?" He pointed at the growing bump on the side of his head. "Really, if I didn't love you guys so much…"

"We know, Gil, we know." Antonio waved his hand. "So, we hear your li'l bro's getting hitched?"

Francis' eyes gleamed. "Ah, yes, to our dear Felicia. Cute, violent, and fairly wealthy. What a catch!" He beamed at Gilbert's horrified face.

Gilbert glared at him.

Antonio dared to crack a grin. "Oh, please, they're all growing up so fast!" He patted the silver-haired man on the shoulder. "C'mon, Lud's like, what? Eighteen? Nineteen?"

"Twenty-one," Gilbert snapped.

" –Twenty-one, gracias," Antonio continued. "Anyway, we're growing so old already! Fran's twenty-three and you and I are twenty-two. And Ludwig's getting married before you!"

Gilbert snorted. "Hah! Me? Get married? I'm too awesome for that!"

"I pity the foolish girl," Francis muttered under his breath. Out loud, he said, "So when is the wedding, mon ami?"

Gilbert put a finger on his chin and started counting on his fingers. "Let's see…February…April…six months from now," he finished.

Francis started clapping. "Wonderful! That means we've got six months to ruin it as best as we can!"

Gilbert started clapping until he realized what Francis said. "Wait – what? Ruin my little bro's wedding? But–"

"Oh, silly Gil, we're not really going to ruin it," Antonio said playfully. "We're just screwing it up a little to mess with their cute little heads. Don't worry, it's not like the church is coming crashing down or anything~"

Gilbert felt he had a reason to worry.

But he was Gilbert. He was never one to follow what he felt.

"I'm in," he sighed. "But lemme tell ya: Lud and Feli want this to be the wedding of the century. As in it's going to be set on some fancy island in the middle of the Mediterranean or something with professional chefs and all. To screw up something that big…"

"…we're going to need plenty of friends," Francis interrupted. "And as I'm sure you know, my dears, we are in no shortage of those."

Reviews are loved. 3