Because school is evil, which is why I haven't posted a fic in like, forever.

Slight spoilers up to the Nationals, I guess.

(Also: Happy belated birthday to Jackal, whose birthday was on the third! And I guess Yagyuu as well, whose birthday was on the nineteenth of October... yeah, I know I'm really late. -shot-)

"Yukimura-buchou," started Akaya one day.

Yukimura turned around. "Yes, Akaya?"

"Why are you so awesome?"

Yukimura's face lit up with curiosity. "Me?"

Akaya nodded. "The teachers at school let you do whatever you want, you own your opponents in tennis by taking away all of their senses, and you're just really good at everything," he explained. "And I don't get it. How do you do it?"

By now, the rest of Rikkai was listening in on the conversation, also eager to find out the answer.

Yukimura tilted his head in deep thought.

"If you want a day-to-day schedule on Seiichi, I could give one to you," Yanagi said suddenly, stepping in beside Yukimura. "Although I must warn you—the data may not always be accurate. Seiichi is quite unpredictable, and thus I cannot be one-hundred percent sure of my data."

"See?" Akaya continued. "Yanagi-senpai can't even get data on you, and he's the data master! So how do you do it?"

"I have no freaking idea," Niou replied, as if he was the one being asked. He slung an arm around Akaya. "Even I can't figure him out properly... yet."

"Face it, Niou, you'll never be able to use him in one of your illusions," Marui said, blowing a bubble.

"You'll never be able to use an illusion, period," Niou retorted.

"I can too!"

"Oh really? Let me see you be Sanada, then."

Sanada immediately turned to the trickster and volley-specialist, barking his trademark "Tarundoru!"

"Tarundoru!" Marui yelled back, attempting to copy Sanada's deep voice. He proceeded to bitch-slap Niou in the face, who swiftly dodged it.

Akaya ignored them and continued to wait for Yukimura's answer.

"I really can't say how, Akaya," Yukimura finally said after much thought. "Why else do you think I'm apparently awesome?" Inside, Yukimura was already praising Akaya for the compliments that he knew were definitely going to follow. He was no Atobe Keigo, but he did like to think highly of himself.

"Well, I wouldn't want anyone else for a buchou," Akaya started. "Fukubuchou is an evil rock, Yanagi-senpai is too confusing, Niou-senpai is too mean, Yagyuu-senpai is too polite, Jackal-senpai is too much of a sissy, and Marui-senpai is too stupid. You're none of these except for polite, but you don't push it over the top like Yagyuu-senpai."

Yagyuu coughed while Yukimura looked satisfied.

"Stupid?" Marui threw away any last attempts to be like Sanada. "I'm stupid? Brat, I'm a genius, haven't you learned that already? Geniuses are smart, gifted, talented, sexy—"

"Which is exactly why you're not," Niou cut in, smirking. "For once, the brat is actually right about something. Look at that, he's already a step higher than you in life."

"Shut up!"

Akaya stuck his tongue out at Marui before he started explaining again. "You're also better than the captains in the other tennis teams," he continued. "Tezuka-san from Seigaku is pretty much like fukubuchou so he automatically sucks—"

"Tarundoru!" Sanada bellowed.

"You must admit, Sanada, he is right about your similarities with Tezuka," Yukimura said, amusement spread on his face. "Regardless of whether you like it or not."

Sanada stood silent.

Akaya snickered, causing Sanada to give him a death glare. He hid behind Yagyuu before continuing. "And that one guy I beat in the Kantou tournament with the big dot on his forehead is way too weak—"

"His sister's kind of cute, you know," Marui pointed out, blowing a bubble.

Yagyuu looked mildly disturbed. "You barely know her, Marui-kun."

Akaya cleared his throat for attention. "And that other guy who beat Fuji-san in the Nationals plays boring tennis—"

"Even using him as an illusion against that Fuji was boring," Niou agreed, nodding in irritation.

"Stop interrupting me!"

"What's with his bandages?" Jackal asked. "If he's injured, then he shouldn't have even been playing."

Niou merely smirked.

"Wait, so if he was injured, that would mean that Fuji-san was beaten by an injured person, right?" Akaya looked thoughtful. "And then that means that Niou-senpai was beaten by a guy who weak enough to be beaten by an injured guy!" Akaya grinned triumphantly. "That shows how much Niou-senpai sucks at tennis!"

Yukimura shook his head fondly. "He was really just looking for an opportunity to pounce on Niou, wasn't he?" He made his voice quiet enough for only Yanagi to hear him.

"I wouldn't be so sure about that, Seiichi," Yanagi replied just as softly. "He's really quite awed by you. In fact, we all are."

Yukimura smiled but said nothing, instead just turning back to the others in front of him.

"You lost to Fuji too, brat," Niou pointed out simply.

Akaya ignored him, but still pouted slightly as he finished. "There's also the other guy who also has a dot on his face. It would suck to have him as a buchou. His ego is way too big for his own good."

"Sounds like some people I know," Niou said offhandedly. Marui whacked him with his tennis racket.

"Yukimura-kun is impressive, though," Yagyuu spoke up, adjusting his glasses.

Marui nodded. "Isn't there a song about him where we pretty much start chanting his name at some point?" he asked.

"Kami no ko, sore ga Yukimura; kami ni erabareshi otoko, sore ga Yukimura... Yukimura..." Niou sung, his voice pitch-perfect.

"Yeah, that."

"I rather like that song," Yukimura said, nodding.

"Of course you do, you're the Child of God," Jackal muttered.

Akaya's eyes widened. "Exactly! You're the Child of God!" Then he pouted. "You get such a cool nickname. Mine's just either the junior ace or bloodshot devil."

"Bloodshot devil is kind of cool, you know," Jackal pointed out. Immediately he regretted speaking up and prayed that no one would remember that he was known as a Wall.

Akaya shrugged. "I guess, but it's nothing compared to Child of God."

"Well, I'm just known as the volley-specialist," Marui complained. "Honestly, shouldn't people be more aware of my genius-like capabilities?"

"Not when there are people like Fuji Syuusuke of Seigaku and Oshitari Yuushi of Hyoutei in the tennis circuit," Yanagi stated.

"If they are geniuses, I am an artist," Niou mumbled to himself.

Marui gave him a weird look. "What does that have to do with anything?"

Niou ignored him. "With the art of pretending, I'll topple the genius to the ground..."

"Fuji defeated you," Yukimura reminded him sharply. "Niou, go run 50 laps."

Niou shrugged and complied, muttering something about 'Meteor Drive'—whatever that could be.

Everyone else kept silent about how Yukimura lost to Echizen.

Yanagi cleared his throat hesitantly, breaking the awkward silence. "Seiichi also has a way of drawing everyone towards him," he said, bringing the conversation back into safe waters. "Regardless of whether one's original intentions were to follow him or not."

"I don't get it," Marui said sulkily. "How does Yukimura do it with no effort whatsoever, while my genius-ness is left unnoticed?"

Akaya's reply was immediate. "It's because you're stupid, Marui-senpai."

"I am not stupid!"

"It's also because buchou's smile is pretty," Akaya continued, completely ignoring his bright-haired senpai.

Yukimura felt pleased. He smiled at his kouhai for the compliment. Akaya felt a bit woozy from the sight.

"He's also really good at tennis," Jackal added, also taken in by Yukimura's smile.

"And he's just really good at everything," Sanada finished.

There was an awkward silence.

Yagyuu coughed. "Sanada-kun... you really needed to get it out, didn't you?"

"TARUNDORU!" Sanada barked, lowering the brim of his cap to hide any expression. "Yagyuu, 50 laps around the courts!" Yagyuu nodded and obeyed his orders like the little Gentleman he was.

Jackal felt sad that Sanada was made fun of for complimenting Yukimura, while he was left unnoticed as if there was nothing wrong with what he had said just moments before. Did they find it normal for him to shy away from his manliness?

Yukimura coughed lightly, drawing all attention to him. "So in other words, Sanada," he started, his smile changing dangerously. "You felt ashamed to express how you truly feel about me?"

Niou catcalled. "Way to go, Sanada!" he cheered, still running his laps.

Sanada looked nervous. "Y-Yukimura—"

Yukimura crossed his arms. "80 laps."


"Now, Sanada!"

In the end, the regulars never really got an answer for Akaya's question. Instead, they all laughed at Sanada for running his laps, all knowing how he couldn't escape the power of Yukimura; which wasn't too bad, either.


Yes, the regulars really enjoyed Sanada's moment of inferiority.

Virtual cookies to those of you who have listened to the song Marui mentions and Niou sings. The "Yukimura... Yukimura..." part always made me laugh for some reason.

(And did any of you catch the reference to Illusion? -is a Rikkaimyu addict- xD)