Disclaimer: I don't own Big Time Rush
Logan Mitchell walks to the front steps of his best friend James Diamond's house. Gustavo finally gave the boys some time off, allowing them to visit Minnesota for a couple weeks. Now, after spending a few hours at his own home, Logan decided to hang out with James for a while. Believe it or not, Logan and James have always been the closest of the four boys. The boys have been best friends since Kindergarten. One time, when there were in first grade, some fifth grader named Jason Parks was bullying Logan and James tackled him. He didn't win the fight, but he wasn't about to let anyone hurt his friend. And in sophomore year, when James broke his ankle playing hockey, Logan was the first one at his side. Logan had called an ambulance, then stayed with James and attempted to comfort the boy.
The boys are like brothers and nothing will ever change that. They have stuck together through the good and bad times.
And whatever is going on in the house right now doesn't sound good. It doesn't sound good at all.
Logan can hear the sound of two people screaming at each other and a crash or two is heard every once in a while. Logan doesn't know what is going on, but he is desperate to find out. He slowly walks over to the living room window and peers inside. He watches as Mr. and Mrs. Diamond have yet another argument. This has been going on for a year and Logan is the only person that knows about it. James hasn't told Kendall or Carlos what goes on in his house. When the boys found out that they were going to L.A, James told Logan that he couldn't wait to get out of there, so he wouldn't have to hear his parents fighting.
"YOU ARE THE MOST SELFISH, UNCARING PERSON THAT I HAVE EVER HAD THE DISPLEASURE OF KNOWING!" Mrs. Diamond screams at her husband. She grabs a glass vase and throws it at him, but he moves out of the way and the vase hits the wall, shattering into a million pieces.
"IF I'M SO TERRIBLE THEN WHY DID YOU MARRY ME?" Mr. Diamond shouts back at her.
"BECAUSE I LOVED YOU! BUT MAYBE THIS WHOLE THING WAS A MISTAKE!"
"WELL, IF THAT"S HOW YOU FEEL, THEN MAYBE I SHOULD JUST LEAVE!"
"GO AHEAD! SEE IF I CARE!"
Logan watches as Mr. Diamond storms out of the living room, returning a few minutes later with a few suitcases in his hands. Logan hears the front door opening so he quickly kneels down, being hidden by the bushes by the window. He peers over the top of the bush to see James rushing outside, grabbing his dads arm.
"Dad, where are you going?" The boy asks worriedly. Logan looks up at the night sky and notices some dark clouds, indicating that a storm is on it's way.
"I need to get away for a while." Mr. Diamond says, resting his hand on James's shoulder. "I'm sorry, buddy."
Mr. Diamond pulls James into a hug and kisses his head before throwing his suitcases in the back of his car. He hugs James one last time before getting in his car and driving away. Logan watches as James messes with the sleeves of his grey hoodie, sniffling quietly. He walks to the front steps of his house and sits down. He rests his elbows on his knees and holds his head in his hands.
This vulnerable, stressed out side of his friend isn't something that Logan is used to seeing. James has always been the strong one of the group, not showing his emotions and trying to be strong for everyone else. Logan always told him that holding everything in isn't healthy, but James never listened to him. He would just act like everything is okay and ignore the problems, instead of dealing with them.
Logan carefully stands up and steps away from the window, watching James with concern. He stands there for a moment, unsure of what to do or say. Finally, he gets the courage to approach his friend. He sits next to James on the steps and wraps his arm around the boys shoulders.
James slowly looks up and stares at Logan with surprise and slight annoyance in his eyes. Logan doesn't know why James would be annoyed with him, so he might be wrong about the annoyance part.
"Were you watching the whole thing?" He asks with bitterness in his voice.
"Well...Um...Kind of...Maybe..." He stammers. He lets out a sigh, not wanting to lie to his friend. "Yes, James. I saw the whole thing."
"Great." James breathes out as he stands up. He turns around and walks into the house. When he walks into the living room, his mom is no longer there. However, he can hear her sobs coming from upstairs. He stares at the shattered pieces of the vase that is laying by the wall. It looks like a tornado came through this place. The coffee table is knocked over, there are several broken cups and vases. It looks horrible and depressing in here. His parents fight must have gotten pretty heated.
He collapses onto the couch and buries his face in his hands, feeling his heart aching. He hears footsteps getting closer and closer, and he looks up to find Logan staring down at him. He watches as Logan sits next to him on the couch.
"I'm sure that they will come to their senses eventually." Logan says hopefully. He feels regret as soon as he speaks the sentence. Yeah right! From the looks of this place, James will be lucky if his parents ever speak to each other again. Much less "Come to their senses." So, yeah. It's not likely that they'll ever make up.
He knows that it isn't any of his business, but he can't help feeling angry at James's parents. Don't they see what their fighting is doing to their son? Can't they see how much they are hurting him? They couldn't even try to make it work? For James? They obviously don't care about James enough to stop this nonsense. It just doesn't seem right.
James stands up and walks out of the room. He walks into the kitchen and opens the refrigerator, grabbing a Pepsi. He opens the bottle and takes a large sip before putting it back in the refrigerator. He flinches when he hears another loud sob coming from his mom. He hates to hear her crying, but after everything that has happened today, he doesn't think he can face her right now.
He closes the refrigerator door and leans against it.
"James, I'm sorry. That was the wrong question to ask." Logan says as he sits on a chair by the kitchen island. He glances as James, who is leaning against the refrigerator with his arms crossed. His jaw is clenched tightly and Logan silently wishes that James wasn't so stubborn and guarded. James has built a wall around himself, refusing to let himself get hurt. But doesn't he get it? He doesn't need to be so protective of himself? He has friends and family that care about him and would never hurt him in any way. Logan starts to say that out loud, but his voice seems to get caught in his throat, preventing him from speaking. This is his best friend that we're talking about! They have always been able to tell each other anything, so why not now? Well, he doesn't want to upset James, so he is afraid to say anything at al. Even something as comforting as what he was about to say. James obviously isn't emotionally stable right now, so anything might upset him right now.
James slowly walks over to the island and sits on a chair across from Logan. He runs one hand through his hair, taking a deep breath.
This awkward silence is a whole new concept for the two boys. They have never run out of things to talk about, so why now? Logan realizes that this is a sensitive subject, but James would usually talk to Logan when his parents were fighting. And Logan would always comfort him, something going over to his house to distract him by helping him with his homework or something.
Right now, neither of them is saying a singe word. Logan silently watches as James absentmindedly messes with the sleeves of his hoodie, looking down at his hands.
After a few more minutes of sitting in silence, Logan decides that he can't take the silence anymore. This is ridiculous! They're best friends! They need to talk about this.
"James, buddy," He says carefully. "We need to talk about this."
"Why?" James asks him. not removing his gaze from his hands.
"Because we're best friends, and I don't think it's healthy for you to keep everything bottled up inside."
"Why are you insisting on talking about this?" James asks as he stands up. "I don't want to talk about it."
"Just let it go, okay?"
James walks out of the kitchen and begins walking towards the front door. He starts to reach for the doorknob, but Logan grabs his arm and pulls him away from the door. It is starting to rain outside and Logan doesn't want James to get sick.
With tearful eyes, he turns to face his best friend. He stares at Logan with an emotionless expression on his face.
He removes him arm from Logan's grip and turns back around, turning the doorknob and stepping outside. Logan immediately follows James as the boy begins walking down the sidewalk. Soon they are both soaking wet from the rain that is pouring down from the sky.
He grabs James's arm again, preventing him from walking any farther.
"Just let go, Logan!" James says angrily.
"I'm not going to let you walk away! You're obviously hurting and I wish that you would just admit it! You always do this, James. You get your heart broken and you just push everyone away. I'm trying to help you, James. But I can't do that unless you let me." Logan says desperately.
"Why bother helping me? It's not like you'll be able to fix my parents marriage." James says as he turns away from Logan.
Logan rests his hand on James's shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze. James wipes his tear filled eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie. He sits down on the grass, stretching his legs out in front of him.
Logan feels his heart breaking as he sits next to his friend. James doesn't deserve everything that has been thrown at him. His parents shouldn't have let things get this bad. They should've went to marriage counseling or something. But they didn't even try to make things better between them. They just let their marriage spiral out of control, not realizing or even caring about how much it might affect their son.
"You wanna know the whole story?" James asks quietly.
"It would be kind of nice." Logan says. "Well, I don't know if nice is the right word, maybe helpful would be better."
"Dude, I get it." James laughs weakly. His smile slowly fades, replaced by a sad expression. "The other day, my mom invited one of her coworkers over, and I overheard her telling them that she was going to file for divorce if things got worse. Now that my dad has left us, I guess that's what she's going to do."
"So your mom was already thinking of divorcing him."
"I guess so." James says. "It seems like their marriage was falling apart more and more every day. When mom was at home, dad would work late. When my dad was home, mom would work late. They made sure to avoid each other as much as possible. Did I ever tell you that they don't even sleep in the same room anymore? Yeah, my dad sleeps on the couch now."
"Please don't apologize." James says, looking away.
"I can't help it." Logan whispers.
"Logan, it's not like you could've done anything to fix this."
"I know." Logan says. "But if I could've just been there for you more, I wouldn't feel so guilty right now."
"Will you stop with the guilt trips?" James says, standing up and looking at Logan. "You tell me that It's not good to bottle things up inside, but what about you? You blame yourself for things that aren't even your fault!"
"I'm serious!" James says, laughing humorlessly. "Just face it, Logan. You can't do anything about this, okay? It's over!"
Logan can sense some frustration and sadness in James's voice. He feels tempted to stand up and comfort his friend, but he just sits there and watches as James paces back and forth. He listens to James's heavy breathing, feeling slightly worried. He continues to watch James carefully for any signs of a possible panic attack.
"You know, sometimes things happen and there is nothing that you can do about it! Not everything is this world is that easy! Some things in this world are permanent and just have to be accepted. Like my parents! Their marriage is in ruins, but you don't see me complaining! They are never going to get back together, so I might as well just accept it! This is what my life is going to be like from now on! So it's better to just be strong, even though I feel like falling apart!"
Suddenly, James grabs a rock and throws it in some random direction before collapsing to the ground in tears. Logan's own eyes fill with tears as he crawls over his friend. He rests his hand on the boys back, listening to James's sobs. He finally gets the courage to wrap his arms around James, hugging him tightly.
James turns around and buries his face in Logan's shoulder, sobbing uncontrollably. Logan pulls him closer, trying provide as much comfort as possible.
"Why did he leave?" James sobs.
"I don't know, James." Logan whispers. "I really don't know."
And the two boys just sit there, one trying to comfort the other. Logan hates that James is going through this. James is a great person, so it's not like he deserves any of this.
With one arm wrapped around the boys shoulders, Logan places one hand behind James's head, whispering comforting words in his ear. He tries to ignore the fear, anxiety, and sadness in his heart. James has never cried before. Even when he felt like crying, he didn't. But now...Now he is just letting it all out. The emotions that he has been holding inside are finally being revealed.
"You're lucky, Logan." James says as he pulls away from his friend.
"What?" Logan asks in disbelief. How could James possibly consider him to be lucky? James is the one with the good looks. James is the one that gets the girl. Sure, James's parents are broken up, but he still has a lot going for him. Don't get him wrong. Logan loves being the smart guy of Big Time Rush, but sometimes he wishes that he could be more like James. He wants the confidence and good looks that James has. No way, James is the lucky one.
"James, I think that you're lucky." Logan says. When he hears James laugh in disbelief, he is quick to explain. "You're the one with the good looks, you always get the girl, and you were always more popular than me."
"Camille seems to like you." James says, referring to Logan's almost girlfriend. They aren't actually together, but there are some sparks between them. At first, Logan thought she was kind of creepy, with the random slapping and kissing. However, he soon started to have feelings for her.
"And what about Marlena Santiago from our homeroom class?" James asks. Marlena was a girl that the boys knew when they lived in Minnesota. She had a huge crush on Logan. Some might say that she was obsessed with him. She had way too many pictures of him in her locker, she would constantly stare at him in class, and sometimes she would even follow him around, trying to ask him out. He did end up going to the dance with her one time, but it was kind of a pity date because no one else would ask her out. And Logan, being the nice person that he is, felt sorry for her.
"Oh yeah." Logan shivers. "She was a stalker."
Upon hearing Logan's comment, James laughs. Something that he hasn't done all day. And this time, his laughter actually sounds real.
"Yeah, she was kind of creepy." He chuckles. He wipes a few stray tears from his cheeks.
"Are you okay now?" Logan asks him. James takes a deep breath before nodding.
"Yeah, Logie." He says. "I'm fine."
And with that, Logan pulls James back into a hug, happy that he was able to comfort his friend and make him feel better. That's what they've always done, and that's what they will continue to do. Be there for each other, like friends should be.
"Now let's go back inside before we both catch a cold." Logan says, standing up. He grabs James hand and pulls him to his feet. James crosses his arms, feeling the coldness of the rain that has soaked his clothing.
"Good idea." He says before following Logan into the house. As they walk inside, James realizes something important.
He is grateful to have a friend like Logan.
A/N: This is just a nice Logan/James friendship one shot. I hope that you all enjoyed it. Review!
By the way, I will be updating Round and Round and Life Changing soon.